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  2. Embarrased in Front of My Wife

    It's not my intention to make anyone feel like shit. I feel like shit all the time, so I don't know what it's like to live tolerably or what I should or shouldn't post. I'm just trying to get the point across. I honestly don't know how you can draw any sort of equivalency between "big dick problems" and SPS. It's ridiculous. My conclusions on the penis issue are as follows: the brain is the most important sexual organ we have. Perception is reality - knowledge is essentially relational, and although the object is the same in every case, perspective determines the relation. Therefore I think the idea or aesthetic of a large penis matters more than the actual size itself. It's appearances. In the past, it may have been different because large penises were portrayed as comical or animalistic. But today that's no longer the case because modern life is so materialistic, and the idea of bigger is better is so entrenched, the overriding importance attached to appearances. All I know is that not a week goes by that I don't hear some joking reference to penis size at work. Corporate politics is irrelevant - if it's a heavily feminist environment you get the women discussing sexuality openly, if it's a "good ole boy" frat house atmosphere (the kind I'm most familiar with) you get more of the same locker room "heh heh heh, so-so's got a small dick" bullshit. Whats important to remember is that perception is not spontaneous, it's manufactured. The homosexuals made big dick obsession mainstream back in the 60's and 70's. There may have been outliers, but on the whole I don't think it was carried to the extreme it is now, not even among the hoi polloi.
  3. Today
  4. Embarrased in Front of My Wife

    I had a comedy bit about 'women who get the D are less angry'. My views were, oh really? It's my contention that you could fuck a woman with a 12 inch cock, make her cum multiple times, flip her over and cook her through, then finish up with a pack of smokes and a kip. One hour after that, she'd be ready to be pissed off about something regardless of your cock size. The Dalai Lama is flipping out about the young monks not using fabric softener on his robes, but she's like a Disney character with birds landing on her head? Leave a towel on the floor an hour later, all that goes out the window, hung or not. Otherwise why would big men like this guy be looking for fantasy sex with a cuck and a sexy wife/gf? Because it isn't real, that's why. This isn't life, it's fantasy. Like every aspect of sex that is meant to spice up and shake the dust off, it isn't long term, it's one off, a treat. And that ain't life. You guys are perfect, maybe not porn perfect, but only the minority are. Bigger men don't try, they're cock sure. Smaller men aren't cock sure so we make sure. Women prefer that, hence they married you and not king ding a ling.
  5. Embarrased in Front of My Wife

    I'm speechless regarding a response to the ad. It hurts to even read it because whether it's true or not it feels "real". My wife's text discussion, with her friend, further strengthens this belief because even though she didn't come out and say that she prefers a larger cock, the unspoken words came through loud and clear Circling back around to my original post, I think all of our discussions explain why I feel ashamed for my wife to see me nude and flaccid. I definitely do not feel like a "man" and even though I consider myself masculine in my hobbies (hunting, fishing, football, billiards, etc...), I do not feel masculine in my body. All male animals have some aspect that identifies them as "alphas", deer have antler size, peacocks have the size of tail feathers, and there are many other examples. I've often wondered if cock size was this aspect for humans. Since we cover our genitals it's not as clear cut but if we were all naked it makes me wonder if I would have ever had sex.
  6. Embarrased in Front of My Wife

    This is from a hookup site for a guy advertising for couples at a large city in Texas, USA. I won't link to the actual ad because he has pics, but he's not lying about the size. The ad could be fake, the pics are not. It begs the question, if it is fake, what would motivate someone to post it? Moreover, although this guy is much more eloquent than most, it's not unique - I masochistically look at these ads all the time, and it's always the same more or less..."hey, horse dick here for your wife's ecstasy..." So here's the text of the ad: **TRIGGER WARNING** **TRIGGER WARNING** age: 32 <q><b>Me: 32, intelligent, educated, handsome, bearded, fit, hung (10 inches and very thick) with stamina and talent to match. I have more than a decade of experience as a bull for cuck couples. I'm seeking a cuckold couple for an ongoing relationship, and I'm very open to training newbies. You: Attractive wife/girlfriend, or Cuckold husband/boyfriend. Let's face it, cuckolding is quickly becoming the standard relationship dynamic of our time. The reason is simple, it is a woman's biological need to be fucked by a superior man. Her body's desires cannot be contained by any amount of religious or social engineering. Women need deeply satisfying sex with attractive, dominant, well-hung men to truly feel happy and at ease, which is why more and more couples are starting to reap the rewards of cuckolding. Do you want to see your wife taken like never before? Do you want to see her with her legs spread wide open, her toes spreading and curling as a giant cock stretches her beyond belief, making her cream and squirt until she goes crosseyed and passes out from sheer bliss? If so, I may be able to help. Please respond with a brief description of yourself and your experience level, as well as some pictures. Make your subject line: "Alphas Play and Betas Pay" I look forward to hearing from you.</q></b>
  7. Embarrased in Front of My Wife

    Honestly, that wasn't even what I was looking for when I was reading her texts. I just happened upon it. They were talking about ex's, in general, and my wife said that she looked her ex up on Facebook and he was still extremely hot. She then went on to talk about his size and how it made her sore to begin with until she got use to it. Then there was some bragging about his expertise in oral pleasure. Needless to say, I felt absolutely miserable after reading that discussion. I think that drove me to one of the lowest points in my life. That occurred about 2 years ago and it still hurts me to think about it. I never did mention it to her and likely never will. I am very glad though that I haven't seen where she has told others about my size. I'm not saying it hasn't happened but that conversation would have been much worse to me if she had told her friend about my size as a comparison.
  8. Embarrased in Front of My Wife

    Ouch. I went looking for emails like that ince when my wife left herself logged in on my laptop. Glad i didn't find any. What i found was emails from her friends from back when we started dating telling her i look just like her ex, and that they like me a lot better than him. So there's that going for me. 😁
  9. Embarrased in Front of My Wife

    @Powerhouse8000 there are plenty of co-ed nude spas around here in the bay area. But wait, you're saying you're too big to even have sex? Jesus Christ. I bet that is super frustrating, but my initial reaction is still one of extreme jealousy. At least the world we live in looks at what you have as the pinnacle of masculinity, and you don't live your life in shame. Some guys here suffer from the perception of being small when they're really average. Maybe your perspective could help guys like that realize they're lucky. But most of us are actually small. We get laughed at, everywhere from tv and movies, to social environments, locker rooms, and inevitably, in the bedroom. We are conditioned to live in shame, from every angle. Question our own manhood. Try to hide it. Control who knows. Fear the next time someone finds out, knowing they will laugh, privately if not right in front of you. You must realize that is a different order of magnitude of trauma than what you experience on the other end of the spectrum.
  10. Yesterday
  11. Newbie

    I do the same thing, it's normal I think. During sex it's just about us, but when I masturbate it's usually about her with some black guy or something and sex is an ordeal rather that pleasurable entirely. But that's fantasy, so it has to be out the box. I know she wouldn't cheat on me, so I usually imagine I'm in a parallel universe or something. Porn has ruined us all 😂😂
  12. The Bathmate Diaries

    Yeh, the dots are quite common, they're very faint, but it's a sign of over pumping or the pressure being too high. I very rarely get 90%+ erections when I'm by myself anyway, so it's actually increased mine by about 20%, I'm harder than ever since pumping. I'm being realistic and not going crazy, so once a day for 5-10 minutes fully erect (or there abouts) is enough. The increased blood flow alone is nice, but I'll keep at it. Work has had my clock up the wall recently, so I'm gonna start working out a bit if I can, keep it low key and not put too much pressure on myself to do it regularly, just weights or something.
  13. Newbie

    Hi @Lodz , I'm with you. I definitely fantasize about her being with bigger guys when I masturbate and even sometimes during sex. It is erotic and I'm not sure why. Maybe I'm thinking that she could be really satisfied with a bigger guy and her satisfaction makes me happy? I don't know what it is but it definitely occurs.
  14. The Bathmate Diaries

    @YOTH i've never had the red dots, but i've pumped til i couldn't get hard for a few days. Scared the hell out of me. I thought my dick had died. I read a rule of thumb that if you can't get an erection at 90%+, rest. @lostboy1 it works by pulling more blood into the penis, which stretches the tunica. That's the balloon-like sheath just under the skin. Repeated stretching of it via pumping, eventually makes the penis thicker. But only to a point. It doesn't make guys like us into porn stars.
  15. Newbie

    This is the most triggering thing in the world for me. Thinking about my wife's former lovers and their presumably bigger packages. This is complicated further by the fact that it turns me on. I fantasize about her with bigger men when i masturbate, when we have sex, when i'm eating lunch, brushing my teeth. It's like my brain eroticizes it to protect me from the painful truth of it.
  16. Planning. I'm not good at it.

    "Life is like a shit sandwich -- the more bread you have the less shit there is to eat."
  17. Last week
  18. Planning. I'm not good at it.

    Here's the text of a meme I saw on FB: I never give money to the homeless. They are going to spend the money on alcohol and drugs. I need the money for alcohol and drugs.
  19. Planning. I'm not good at it.

    It's hard to work a full time job and keep to a regular exercise routine. There are only so many hours in a day and there are other things that have to get done in life outside of work - shopping, chores, housekeeping, paying bills, whatever time one spends w family & friends, pets, downtime, sleep.
  20. Planning. I'm not good at it.

    Alone, in my own head, surrounded by my fantasies, everything I plan for works out great. In reality, it never does. It's been like this all my life. I had a high school crush whom I only dated successfully in my mind. As stated before I masturbated to thoughts of current girlfriends but couldn't have genuine sex with them. Same with college, every job I've had...alone in my shitty room in my own thoughts I manufacture delusions of grandeur and success then I actually get there and it's just hell. Thats my life - endless fantasy and escapism punctuated by periodic stints at real life when I want to kill myself. Possibly a mood stabilizer might help like you suggested but I don't know. I should get more exercise but I get demotivated watching other guys and give up. I don't know what to do.
  21. Planning. I'm not good at it.

    Sorry if you are feeling down Klingsor. I am struggling w feeling anxious and sad. I just can't seem to make any significant progress on anything. The minute things start to go the slightest bit my way life will drop a boulder in front of me. Today I am feeling bewildered. Asking myself "how?". Is there something chemically wrong w my brain or other physiology? Doing my best - eating better, avoiding alcohol, trying to minimize stress, trying to be proactive. But improvements are around the margins at best.
  22. Diet/Gym/Health/Sanity

    @R▴SH▴▴N Thanks but it's pointless.
  23. Best options for dating/meeting women online?

    I have deleted my account on Fabswingers and hid my account on Fetlife today. I honestly think it's probably better to try using a normal dating site. Between those two sites I met up with one woman in total. Compare that with 30+ that I've met off of POF over the course of five years. I don't really understand Tinder that much, so have been chatting to some women on POF again. Generally what I find is that while I do get conversations - I've had about 20 different conversations of varying lengths in the past week since I joined - the women that I do talk to tend to be pretty average or in some cases below. The genuinely hot women are for the most part out of reach to me. So I think I should join a gym. Yes, I do get exercise at my work 5 days a week, and it is physical manual labour most of the time. Yes, I am trying to eat a reasonably healthy diet most of the time. But I could still be in better shape than what I am, even if I don't look awful. I don't have a lot of money this month, but after the clocks change next month I'm going to seriously consider joining a gym. I have done the gym before but that really was years ago. I have doubts about whether I would have the time or energy to go to the gym through the week, but definitely I would have the time to go on weekends. Don't know whether I would like to do cardio (rowing machine, treadmill etc) or weights or both. I have got some trainers and some sports clothes so have all the necessary stuff to get started. What about swimming as well? Is that worth a try? I have a couple of reservations about swimming though - I would only want to go at a time when there are no kids there. Don't want to be seen as a paedo. Again, it's the demonization of men thing. Also I'm not sure what the accepted standard clothing for swimming is. Is it better to wear long shorts that drag in the water, or the tight Speedo type swimwear? You have to have a good body to be able to look good in the latter as it is very tight - they basically just look like women's bikinis but with extra space to accomodate a man's bulge. But then the problem with the long shorts is that they can also fall off your arse if they are loose, and I have had that happen on holiday before. Also whether it's at the gym or at the swimming pool there are going to be lots of women in tight clothing to perv on. One thing that puts me off a little bit, especially with swimming, is the idea that people would think that I was going there to have a perv. But even at the gym women wear all these tight leggings don't they that show off their ass? My body is not actually bad, I am tall with broad shoulders and quite a lot of muscle already. I just think I could do with improving my stamina and also getting rid of some excess body fat. I am not by any means very large and I don't look particularly fat but I am carrying a little more weight than I should. I do find the hot women very attractive. The ones that look like porn stars or pop singers. The only way to get them is to be the sort of guy that they would go for, and since they are for the most part every bit as shallow and looks obsessed as men, if you want them you have to look your absolute best and be in good shape. Anyone want to offer any advice on this?
  24. Diet/Gym/Health/Sanity

    Sorry to intrude, not sure about the adolescents and penial growth development but to look into treat before they get older. Klingstor, on behalf of your depression and anxiety, it's best that you drink plenty of water if not the other thing you drink and go for some 5k jog/runs. When you are comfortable let those jogs turn into runs and wear comfy gear. Eat nutrients and keep pacing yourself until you hit "runners high". Try to also incorporate some weights and calisthenics before going on a run if you can. Cheers.
  25. Back again with a whole new set of issues.

    LOL! No not at all, he just said he could relate to what I posted.
  26. Back again with a whole new set of issues.

    Did he post an abusive message in here which was deleted?
  27. Embarrased in Front of My Wife

    Oh well. Each to their own and all that
  28. Embarrased in Front of My Wife

    Oh well. Each to their own and all that
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