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  2. Self deprecating fantasies

    I fantasize about being cuckolded by a girlfriend or wife. I'm single now, but I was in a poly relationship. She didn't use the term cuckolding, but she had a husband, and two boyfriends with big dicks. Yes, she really did. That 2nd boyfriend was a trans male. She asked him to buy a larger strapon than the one he was originally wearing. It wasn't until my birthday about 5 years into the relationship that I had the chance to see her with her tall hung boyfriend. He never wanted to let me watch, but she would have from the beginning. He frustrates the hell out of me, yet we are neighbors and really close friends to this day even though she has moved in with her trans male partner. A year or so into my relationship with her I realize that even if I couldn't watch her with the biggest boyfriend, if she called my penis small, I'd get somewhat of a similar dynamic. It did work. I didn't want that often though. At the end before she moved on she offered to do it more as she was trying to build intimacy between us again. It had died down because I saw her drifting really really close to the trans boyfriend and away from the rest of us. I have been and still am accepting of my desire to be cuckolded. The only BIG problem that I have with it is finding a primary life partner that is into it as well, or as my last girlfriend......is poly and has hung lovers. I don't need a whole lot of cuckold talk, just the right ingredients/people. Another thing that happened to me was that I got interested in fisting and large insertions early on in my sex life. My first girlfriend had a large vulva and very elastic vagina. It intimidated me, made me curious, and turned me on big time all at once! I've been into fisting ever since that first relationship, but I didn't know that fisting was an actual sex act till getting on the internet a year or two later. I had my first sexual experience in 95'. I think we should not feel shame for having these fantasies. I think when we do it is because we are believing mainstream opinions about these fantasies. Something that helped me too was looking at tumblrs about small penises. There are some that are not about humiliation. Both the SPH posts and the non humiliation posts have helped me to see that smaller penises can be sexually fun too. I think giving some light small penis humiliation a try is a good idea. It can be therapeutic. Some amount of acceptance happens. Going to nude beaches or being nude at hippie festivals has helped me too.
  3. Girl of My Dreams

    Your title caught my eye. I got involved with a woman that I REALLY like at the beginning of this month. We were at lots of parties last year and ended up caressing each other lots, but it always ended there. The, about 3 weeks ago she asked me for a date. She slept over after 2 dates. She has since dropped me, and just wants to be friends. I feel like it is due to my penis and that my house isn't complete/clean enough. I have a peyronies injury and struggle getting erections and I lost some size- girth and length. It really hurts since she has so many common interest with me and that has been very difficult to find. I agree with the suggestion of dancing around the topic of penis size, indirectly, to see what she thinks. I feel like I'm in a conundrum. I can be picky about a woman's level of fitness, yet I definitely could be physically critiqued for my height and stature. I've mostly stayed quite fit, but still. I also fear that I may have to compromise as I'm now 38. It's a tough choice. I've been with women that were good for me, but that I wasn't attracted to a lot. I think this is how this last woman viewed me, and she cut the ties. She knows I'm compatible in a lot of ways......but.....
  4. Today
  5. New Here, but Longtime Struggler

    Thanks Griz. I'm glad to hear from another syndrome person. I flop back and forth between wanting to enlarge my penis, and then somewhat embracing it. I was a very active member at thundersplace for years, a non profit penis enlargement forum. My view of my penis has been quite a roller coaster ride, especially having had this peyronies injury.
  6. This is a very good question but I'm honestly not sure I have an answer. I think the reason it frustrates me is that while I've been married for many years and have somewhat learned to deal with my SPS, at least externally to the world, I see many younger people coming on here for support and direction who are really struggling to exist. They are looking for informative help in how to deal with their struggles. In talking through this, I think I feel that the "hand grenade" posters throw out very vague advise or experiences and "muddy the waters" for people who are just coming to the site for some quick support or grounding. I realize most people who come here don't stay and that is what I would expect for many people who are seeking answers for their own struggles. I guess it just bothers me when the posters who are offering solutions jump in with a vague post and then disappear. I really wasn't upset at the OP but I did want him to explain his motivation for coming here in the first place. Unless your in the mental health field, or struggling with a problem, I have a difficult time understanding the motivation of seeking out a mental health forum.
  7. Yeah, and then there's the opinions and assholes thing, that we've all got at least one. It can be very hard deciding which one they're currently talking out of. :-) You may have read it correctly, lostboy, but as Beth said, we'll never know. Maybe he's an ex-sufferer who has a hard time being patient with his old self, and that's why he's so blunt. (In other words, it's about him and not you.) The real trouble, whatever his motives and as you pointed out, is that he failed to offer constructive advice so that he might help others.
  8. That hand grenade, my way or the highway posting is like meeting a drunk guy at a garden party who tells you that "You have to buy insurance with a permeable guarantee, but only in a slide market otherwise you'll be poor until your dead". He might be taking compete sense and giving you the tip of a lifetime that could save you years of worry and stress. But he came over smelling of roll ups, smugness and Stella Artois, so you just nod and go "yeh, permeated insurance on a water slide, will do". And shimmy off sharpish. On the flip side of that, nobody will ever post something that'll change your mind about your situation unless you're at the end of your metaphorical rope and want to change anyway. So, fuck it.
  9. I do think our forum can be like virtual group therapy. Every interaction, even the uncomfortable ones, can teach something, I think. How we respond to others can help us learn about ourselves. I have to remind myself that it's impossible to know the motivations of others. I also have to remind myself that people won't always interact with me in a way that I need or want them to. I do think that most people who come here don't stay... It's difficult to know why or why they stopped by and decided to post. I could speculate but only the OP knows for sure. (Talking to myself here too) Lostboy, I think you're a great contributor to the site. I enjoy reading your calm and insightful, supportive posts. I get triggered sometimes too and/or have a strong response to some posts or posters at times. Why do you think this kind of post elicits such a response for you? Does it feel diminishing of your experience? I hope not. Maybe you're right about the OP, maybe not, maybe we will never know. Either way, I'm sorry the post was frustrating and upsetting to you.
  10. Yesterday
  11. @lostboy1 - looks like he was with the Russians too.
  12. I really hate to admit that I was right regarding the OP's rapid disappearance but apparently I called this one. This is what frustrates me about posts like this. Someone joins the forum and their first post is them bragging about curing cancer, or SPS in our case. They offer no context to who they are, what struggles they have been through, how they learned to deal with it, or anything even resembling being constructive. Just that they have solved the world's problems and we need to drink the Kool-Aid. If I am off base here please let me know, but as I mentioned before I see a mental health forum, like this, as more of a virtual group therapy session. Maybe I'm looking at this site the wrong way but it frustrates me when these "hand grenade" posters swoop in and drop a bomb of a post like the OP did here. Sorry, off my soapbox now.
  13. Can't laugh

    Hello and welcome! I wonder: Have you already read this and if yes, what do you think about the reactions that forum member received - do they apply to you and how would you reply to them? Take care!
  14. Can't laugh

    At 13, hormones can really cause havoc with your emotions and moods. It's great that you are recognizing this because most people don't. Being aware that this is occurring and trying to find ways out of that mood are a few ways to improve. The hormones will continue to impact you for several more years and during that time I saw permanent changes in my personality.
  15. Last week
  16. Can't laugh

    I can't laugh at the usual things I laugh at anymore. Am I just depressed or is something else going on? The only time I laugh are on rare occasions. And im 13, so does that have to do with it?
  17. New Here, but Longtime Struggler

    @itsSmaller I can tell you that anyone is welcome here. The people here have welcomed me in here and I’m a good size. I struggle with thinking I’m small and inadequate. Even though I know I’m good enough. If that makes any sense.
  18. Girl of My Dreams

    So, when I was married, my buddy and I used to go for wing Wednesday every week. We had been going for a while and then he mentioned that a friend of his was coming with us, which I said fine, it ended up being a really good looking girl. And because I had a wife, I didn’t care and just talked to her normally. We got along great. We talked mostly instant of her and then buddy. The next day at work, he said that she had told him that if I didn’t have a wife that she would totally go on a date with me. She loved how normal I was. I tell that story because could it have been that subconsciously you knew you have a great girl with you right now, so therefore you could actually be yourself around her? I had never been good with chicks that I had liked before, but because I wasn’t thinking about trying to impress her, I didn’t care.
  19. Girl of My Dreams

    @cqbrenner - it's a dilemma. If your linguistic skills are such that you could get a read on the new girl's size preferences through conversation that would be ideal.
  20. Girl of My Dreams

    This is a risk regardless of your cock size so you have to decide if it's a risk worth taking. She could end up not liking you for 1,000 other reasons aside from your dick. You have a known and an unknown and you're decision is based on a physical feeling of lust (prettier, has a better body, etc...) for the unknown since it sounds like you really just started talking to her. I'm just on the outside looking in but it almost sounds like you're basing your feelings about this new girl on her physical attributes while hoping she doesn't judge you on yours. Again, just my impression from the cheap seats.
  21. Girl of My Dreams

    I am 2" soft and just under 4" hard.
  22. I've possibly already posted this, but it's always good to repeat...
  23. Girl of My Dreams

    @cqbrenner oh ok. Sounds like you really like the new girl. I suppose you could roll the dice so long as you are mindful of the risk. There have been guys here 6" and think they are so small so depending on just what your actual size is, it may be less risky than you think. Let us know what you decide and how it turns out.
  24. Girl of My Dreams

    There has been strong hints that she wants to date me. I am not 100% certain, but some of the things she says or the way she acts around me leads me to believe that she would like to date if I wasn't with my current gf. But I get what your are saying, my size is the only thing holding me back and it sucks.
  25. Girl of My Dreams

    Just because she is talking to you does not mean she wants to be your girlfriend. And even if she does then there is the size issue. I would stick w the first gal but that's easy for me to say. Good luck 🍀
  26. Girl of My Dreams

    Just mention penis size to the girl of your dreams. Tell her about a friend who is a lovely guy, he's dating a model but he's self conscious about his size. She says how big, you say 3 inches and see how she reacts. You'll know sharpish whether she's worth the leap of faith. I've had these thoughts before, but it's only outside beauty that I'm attracted to anymore (there are limits obviously) it's the fact that they've accepted me for who I am, it'd be a crying shame not to return the favour accepting her physical shortcomings.
  27. New Here, but Longtime Struggler

    @itsSmaller I know what you're saying, it's daft that there's a cut off point for suffering over size issues, but anyone is welcome here. I think, if you're in pain because of this and looking for a place to feel at home, this is the place. There are sub-sub-sub genres of SPS, but there are no cornered markets on pain and suffering. On a happier note, where are you from roughly, USA?

    Welcome to the community, Precious. Are you able to listen to your needs and care for yourself through these distressful times? When in self destruct mode (I have been there), it can be easy to abandon yourself. Deep breathing helps me to center myself. I try to slow my responses down, sit with myself, and be present. . Anything that frees the mind could be helpful. Everyone is different though, I think, and your needs might be different. Jazz has some good suggestions with exercise and art/creativity. I also agree with Vic that the combination of medication and therapy might also be helpful. Has anything been helpful to you in the past? I hope you feel better, Precious.
  29. Girl of My Dreams

    I am really having a tough time with this and I thought i should reach out for advice. So I have been dating my current gf for a little over a year. She knows about my small size and it has never been an issue for her. I am grateful that she didn't mind that I am small and at first, I was so happy to have finally found someone. To be completely honest, she is a great girl, but there are many things that I feel like I am not completely attracted to her. Apart of me feels like I am settling and it's not a good feeling to have. Now I feel like I am being the shallow one even though I have dated so many shallow girls that made fun of my size. This sucks and I feel horrible. Apart of me feels like I can do better, but then I remind myself that I am under 3 inches and I can't probably do better. And that is on my mind a lot. So to continue on. A girl that I have had a crush on for a really long time, we recently started to talk. I am not cheating on my gf and I will never do that. But apart of me keeps thinking that I have a great choice with this girl if I were to break up with my gf and pursue this girl. But then I think that this girl might not like my size. The heart break of ending my current relationship to get into another one where she may have an issue with my size will break me. But at the same time, why can't I go after the girl of my dreams? Why can't I have what every other guy that has a normal size penis get? Why can't I be that happy? Sorry I am probably rambling on now. I just don't know what to do. Thank you all for your time.
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