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Mistake

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About Mistake

  • Birthday 02/11/2002

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  1. I really honestly don't know anymore. I don't even know what to say or even think anymore. Like, I'm I just making this all up? Maybe I just want attention or something. Its probably it. Maybe I should say whats wrong? Yeah. Well, let's see. A lot of things are wrong? I don't even know anymore. Its Kinda late here. Just wanted to make a note of that. Sorry. But. Uh. I'm not even sure about myself anymore. I think I'm just a liar. You can think whatever you like. I just want to get it off my back. I'm situation is kinda iffy. I don't know what's wrong, so I'm putting it here? Anyway, I'm only a teenager. I feel like that's important. So I can't fix anything. I really want help, I honestly really do. I can't do this anymore. I tried to talk to my parent about things, but, she doesn't want to hear about any of it- she just, "Only you can help yourself.", and "You don't want help." I try to tell her about anything relating to me. She just keeps telling me its my fault. Starts yelling. So. I guess its my fault. Yep. Uh.. Anyway. I just 'struggle' with some really bad thoughts. Suicidal. Things that cause harm to me. Just normal stuff I guess. One of my close friends, bless her, said that they're intrusive thoughts. But, It's like they have a mind of their own sometimes, my thoughts? They're really loud sometimes. But, other times their not?? And they're not always there either. It's weird. I dont even know. They have like other voices, Is that normal? Like, a male voice or a females. Sometime close sounding to my families. People I don't know. The thoughts are just complete nonsense most of the time. Please note, they're not always there. so uh.. Yeah. On another note! Is it normal to feel 'away from yourself'?? I don't even know. I feel so distant. Gone. Like I'm not me. Or something. I don't know what's going on anymore. I feel like I'm falling away from everything I know. I can't even remember very well anymore. I get so off track. And I can't think. I'm super sorry if this makes zero sense. Uh.. I feel like I'm being stupid now. This isn't really urgent I just don't know. I have some other problems too. Mood swings.. But they're really dramatic and I don't think they matter. They're normal i guess. I only typed this originally because I was feeling like I wanted to die.?? But. I'm honestly okay now. I guess. Maybe. Sorry. Edit; along with the weird thoughts. I would like to also note that I often see odd things. I do ask if anyone else experiences things like this? They really make me fearful/paranoid, and its just a side thing I'm wondering. If anyone knows. Because I'm really unsure. Its just when I'm not doing too well with everything. It's really distressing.
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