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Personally, I don't think it is a necessity, However I am not you, and do not know how passionately you feel about needing this closure. If you think you need it to be able to get your self out of this relationship and be able to focus on another one that might happen in the future with someone else, then I say do it . Don't be mean about it, just assertively state how you feel and how he wronged you and that it wasn't ok. Simply tell him how you feel, but do not get caught up in be used again by him, you don't have to be taken advantage of like that, and you have the right to be in a relationship (friend or boyfriend) that is more than that. If says he is sorry for what he did, then great, There is some closure. But then again he could try to justify himself , in which case, you just stop there and stop trying to create closure, because you did your part, but he is unable to do his. So you just leave. It is always good just saying it here on the forums where people can see it, and that in it self could be all the closure you need. Do not let your feeling of closure be proportional to his response, be completely ok with what your going to say, and not rely on what he chooses to say to know that the relationship is over. This is for you, not for him. Anyway, I hope I helped And I wish you good luck with your decision!

I've been Diagnosed with ADD and Depression. I am currently on meds for both ,and a anti-anxiety med on the side, due to a side effect of the ADD meds. I've just noticed that my life has kinda been like a roller coaster. Where occasionally I would go thorugh times where I don't care if I die that day, I'm just happy. this would be caused by a outside trigger, Like something that just made my week, But what would make my week would just be spending sometimes with a person I see as my father figure. However, most of the time I just lack any feeling of joy and become decently depressed (not self harming though). The depression is enough to keep me up some nights though, and i'll be very sensitive to any bad thing that could happen to me and any good thing would just be brushed off and I wouldn't really feel anything. I would sometimes make my self laugh in the mirror by my facial expressions and crude imitations of foreign accents as I talk to my self about my day. My question Is, Could this just be me going through a tough time in life, A need to increase my Depression meds, or Do you think that I could be bipolar.

I am new to the site, so i'm not sure how long I should expect a response to be. My question wasn't really answered. If anyone has anything It would be very much appreciated.

Is it that my problem is too mundane? or does no one really have anything to say? I can accept it if you tell me something I don't want to hear. At this point, any response would be great.

((Do note, that I first posted this in the "new members post here" section, but since that has very little views, I though I would get a higher variety of feedback posting here. Any opinion is appreciated)) Mostly I'm just wondering if i'm overacting..because it seems like, compared to most people, I have a pretty nice life, However my emotions tell me differently. my main problem is that I don't really have a father figure in my life. Never really did. Although as a kid my dad was involved in my life. He caused almost all of the problems that caused the divorce. Regardless, I don't talk to him that much..So I found that I could use my youth pastor as a father figure, I Hangout with him sometimes..although it's hard to do since i am an extreme introvert and he is extremely extroverted. I'm not suffering too much in my daily life..besides the occasional "can't get to bed" , like today. I get almost straight A's..I'm in Gifted classes..And overall think things are ok, but very often i'll have an overwhelming amount of emotion, that I can only describe as either emptiness or overwhelming want. I mean, When I see a (good) dad with his son, either sitting in church or doing what ever, my heart aches, And I long for that. Al though i hang out with my youth pastor, our "hanging out" will mostly be just playing a video game and including very little talking..if there is anytime with talking..I usually can't keep a conversation going..due to my lack of social skills. I find myself day dreaming about being a little kid and just running up to my youth pastor because i'm scared of something or just want to be hugged by my dad. I yearn to see how your suppose to treat a wife and try to emulate him in almost every way possible. It just seems like "It's not enough" <- That is where i have the problem..I feel I have a lot compared to somepeople and complain that it isn't enough..I mean what if i'm asking for is impossible..most of it probably is. For example i could never be his child. He already has 3 infants, He doesn't have the time or physical ability to be my actual father. I just..Idk..I know i have a lot of insecurities,and when I spend a lot of time with him, they just all go away. Maybe part of it is, is that I know that no matter how close I get to him..He's a youth pastor, with children of his own..I'll never occupy a part of his life that would be equivalent to the part he will occupy in mine. Even if It were to be a perfect father figure relationship...He, being a pastor, will probably have many more people do the same to him..And human nature states that he's ganna pick a favorite..And me being unsocial..How do i stand a chance for that position? Even if I did. He has sons of his own..It's completely understandable, and completely expected...And what i'm asking is most likely too much. But he's the most important person in my life, and He's never ganna love me as much as he loves his own children, but I sure love him more than I do my own dad. Idk...I just ...don't know..I usually have things figured out..This is like..trying to divide by 0..It just doesn't work.. :/ I'm just wondering if you all think I am overreacting. Am I justified in my feelings, or is this something that I just need to learn to accept as fact. Also What do you think I can do to help? Talk to my youth pastor, don't talk to him, etc Well, Feel free to leave a reponse on your opinon/helpful comment. Any Help is Appreciated , Thanks Please, I know this seems pretty mundane, but It is causing me a lot of emotional grief.

I'm extremely sorry to hear that things are very rough for you right now. just a thought : Could you being angry at so many people an "Not wanting to take sh*t" from anyone either maybe be associated with your dad? maybe you want to feel like because you don't have a dad, no one else, except the dad you wish you had, has your permission to have authority over you? Also you dream is very interesting..I could be completely wrong, and please tell me if I am..but perhaps it is associated with you wanting to be apart of a brotherhood, with people you could fellowship with (like how the army is) but, because of your past events, you feel that your are going to be betrayed from this fellowship, that is why it is not a pleasant dream. You said that you have had nothing bad happen in your life, that you had a loving , caring mother, and you may feel like you shouldn't have this problem. However , from what I've learned over the years, is that even though others may have it worse off, your emotions don't cease to exist. They are still very important. I'm glad you came here for some help, It is definitely much better than trying to find a solution by your self. From what you've told e, I use to have a similar anger problem when I was younger, where I would Think and say terrible things to my mother, simply because I just had this strange, and bizarre hatred towards her, I couldn't exactly explain why it was. However after a long while in consoling, I see that it has to do with my parents divorcing and me not having a father figure in my life. You aren't a monster, i'ma just tell you this now, because you aren't. You have emotions that are overwhelming and your reactions to them are not rare and "one in a million" you are a normal human being having a reaction to a bad situation. Have you ever seen a counselor? even if you are still in the anger management classes, there are emotions behind that anger that need to be dealt with. The are still good, they may help you to deal with the anger in a healthy way, But having someone to talk to about your emotions is still very important, even if that place is here, or with a counselor, it is better than nothing. I hope that what I said has helped in any way. Take care.

I already see a counselor, She is with the church, since they do counseling for free. She is a female though (I find it easier to open up to females, seeing as my mother is my domicile parent.) Just sometimes problems occur and they can't really wait until my next appointment. So I found out about this website my mere chance and found it as a good place to vent and get a high variety of feedback. I will go check out Who's post and see what I can contribute. Maybe we could help each other reach a conclusion.

Well, since it's 5am And I don't find there to be much of a reason for me to simply wait 'till I have been approved. I hope it is not too much of a problem If I vent a little about some feelings.. Title : Daddy problems - How cliché Mostly I'm just wondering if i'm overacting..because it seems like, compared to most people, I have a pretty nice life, However my emotions tell me differently. my main problem is that I don't really have a father figure in my life. Never really did. Although as a kid my dad was involved in my life. He caused almost all of the problems that caused the divorce. Regardless, I don't talk to him that much..So I found that I could use my youth pastor as a father figure, I Hangout with him sometimes..although it's hard to do since i am an extreme introvert and he is extremely extroverted. I'm not suffering too much in my daily life..besides the occasional "can't get to bed" , like today. I get almost straight A's..I'm in Gifted classes..And overall think things are ok, but very often i'll have an overwhelming amount of emotion, that I can only describe as either emptiness or overwhelming want. I mean, When I see a (good) dad with his son, either sitting in church or doing what ever, my heart aches, And I long for that. Al though i hang out with my youth pastor, our "hanging out" will mostly be just playing a video game and including very little talking..if there is anytime with talking..I usually can't keep a conversation going..due to my lack of social skills. I find myself day dreaming about being a little kid and just running up to my youth pastor because i'm scared of something or just want to be hugged by my dad. I yearn to see how your suppose to treat a wife and try to emulate him in almost every way possible. It just seems like "It's not enough" <- That is where i have the problem..I feel I have a lot compared to somepeople and complain that it isn't enough..I mean what if i'm asking for is impossible..most of it probably is. For example i could never be his child. He already has 3 infants, He doesn't have the time or physical ability to be my actual father. I just..Idk..I know i have a lot of insecurities,and when I spend a lot of time with him, they just all go away. Maybe part of it is, is that I know that no matter how close I get to him..He's a youth pastor, with children of his own..I'll never occupy a part of his life that would be equivalent to the part he will occupy in mine. Even if It were to be a perfect father figure relationship...He, being a pastor, will probably have many more people do the same to him..And human nature states that he's ganna pick a favorite..And me being unsocial..How do i stand a chance for that position? Even if I did. He has sons of his own..It's completely understandable, and completely expected...And what i'm asking is most likely too much. But he's the most important person in my life, and He's never ganna love me as much as he loves his own children, but I sure love him more than I do my own dad. Idk...I just ...don't know..I usually have things figured out..This is like..trying to divide by 0..It just doesn't work.. :/ Well Feel free to leave a reponse on your opinon/helpful comment/ or snide remark about how your life is much worse. ((<- An attempt at humor, not trying to say " ohhh My life is sooo bad because 'this' keeps happening , even though I brought that topic up a few times. By Now i'm sure you've picked up that I do underplay my problems, Which is the opposite of the norm, and for good reason.)) (Apologies for the many errors in my grammar, It is after all, 5am. for me) Any help is appreciated, Thanks.