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mscat

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mscat last won the day on December 19 2013

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About mscat

  • Birthday 10/03/1968

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  • Biography
    single parent, disabled

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  • Location
    California
  • Interests
    Yorkie's, photography

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  1. Hi Jane, nobody who is a professional would laught about this. Perhaps yu could get a referral from your regular DR. to a neurolgist. Just to be on the safe side, and have a sense of peace. When my ED was so bad, I actually had to have pictures of my brain done, because without even knowing it I was talking and not making any sense. All kinds of things can cause brain damage, so if your extremely concerned follow through with getting checked out. I am nearly your age, and my memory is terrible. I have to write everything down otherwise I'll forget. Everyone is different, but if your really concerned, and have good health care insurance go for it, your probally fine, but if it is worrisome to you then go see a neuro.
  2. Thank you guys for your responses and positive feedback. I do not know if i actually said why we moved to a bigger centerally located city, it was for my autistic, intelectually delayed adult son. He is currently in a independant living program, through school, in CA severely disabled kids stay in school until age 22, he will be 21 in August, geez how time flies by! Their are no programs in the town we moved from or transportation, their are 3 in our new city. Throuhout the yrs as a single parent most of my real big choices has based upon my son. The father has not ever been the picture. But, of course seen my son as a infant, but I did not want a man to pick and choose to be with us, so he chose ot to. The weight loss at first fell offf rather quickly, now it has slowed down. I am not happy to say I have returned to bulima:( mostly if I feel have eaten something taboo, or bad for me, I quickly know how and it is still too easy for me to fall back into this. In my lATE TEENS AND mid 20's the ED was exlposivemeaning totally out of control, and falling into anorexia badly at my worst my weight was 75 pounds, but I did go into a ed treatment program, but my body fat was 3%. I was made to be in a wheelchair, because the nurses dr's explained their is fat around your internal organs, and they thought I was going to drop dead. I gained about 25 pounds in treatment, but after I was out I dropped weight again, falling to 87pounds. I am way above that weight, an still fat, still have a long way to go, but it is a little disconcerning the bulimia is coming back. Of course I am more the 20 yrs older, and have had hypothroidism for years now. Problam is, although I have not had any backslides into self injury for at least a year now, Bulimia could be seen as self destructive behavior. I just do not want it to take over my life again, I already have lost 4 of my front teeth and a side tooth from all the stomach acid , due to the bulima yrs ago, and have fake teeth, so No, I am not running around toothless. LOL. I still see the same therapist and psych. dr. But now my therapist sees me at home. Every Tues. I guess it is confession time, because I also engage in petty theft again. Mostly stealing diet aids, so not all is perfectly sunny. I wish these bad old habits had disappeared, a long time ago, but they have a way of coming back yrs later, at the same intensity, if not stronger. I have more tattoos, one in honor of my son , actually two. one says cure autism now, my sons name and the yr he was born on my right forearm ,and I have a autism ribbon, with the correct colors inside with puzzle pieces. so it is really nice. Also, I am still on SSDI and my son too he is on both SSI/ and recieves money as a adult child disabilty. We still have our little service dogs , which provides comfort and some stability. So basiclly thats it. Pretty much all by myself most of the time, with my two dogs. And son who comes home in the afternoon. I have also had money problems for this month, which absolutely sucks. the 2 friends of mine are going through some rough times, one may be pregnant again, who already has 3 small boys, at the age of 24, no help fromm the father, and anther friend knows she is is a alchalic/drinks too much and that is our apt. manager. it is good to finally be back here, I have a new computor, the last one crashed, and never turned on again, but this one is awesome.
  3. Hi Jenna, I do remember you. My childhood was riddled with abuse and neglect. Bt the time I was barely 3 all my brothers were taken away and placed in foster care, then my foster mother was abusive, and it only got worse as I became older. They were a upper middle class family and highly religious. I never had the connection that I fit into this family ever. foster mother was terrible, starting running away at 13, wanting desparately a way out. At aroung age 9 I hoarded as many pills as I could and OD. it just made me vomit. then I swalled a huge amount of straight needles and pins. at a young age, I always was a anious child, easily bullied at school, even had to fight, I always sunk in I was a bad girl, very bad, then I had thoughts of hurting people, very bad thoughts of carrying out these fantasies. I barely turned 16 and nearly was hit by a car, in a daze , so a counselor placed me into a mental hospital without telling the parents. I had also begun a raging eating disorder by then, and the abuse was then turned aganist myself, so I stayed in 3 different mental hospitals, as my foster parents moved out of state without telling me. I went to a group home for a yr or so until I maxed out of age. Suddenly the foster parents claimed me, moved to the bay area where they were living, but the ED went totally out of control. Was kicked out of their place. I ended up renting a room called share rentals, and moved frequently due to the ED. I dropped to 75 lbs at 5'4 in a half, so was hospitalize again, got out and lost all the weight. Anyway, their were always fighting betweent the foster parents, really bad ones, the mother blamed me all the time, and always thought I was a liar. Never lied . My foster father was there for me on occasion, so when I got pregnant, and was not going to listen to them , or their wishes, he helped me get into my first apt. life completley changed after having my son, and I worked full time. Raised him, went through hell when he showed signs of autism, and aggressive behaviors ,got throught it, those difficult years. Only to backslide into more extreme behaviors years later towards myself. The anger I had was directed towards me, everything is/was my fault. I really went after myself with a vengence, but always knew what to say to stay out of a hospital, or from a 5150. Anyway, I still struggle with these things, still hating the foster mother, still fighting the anger and rage. Do what you need to do in order to take care of yourself and your family, try to focus on that, now that you are parent your awareness of your childhood experiences may come and go. You were a innocent little girl, not your fault. perhaps your parents were dealing with their own stuff, especially after your brothers untimely death. They may not have good coping skills. Again not your fault .
  4. OMG, it has been forever since i've been here, glad I placed this on my favorite list, otherwise I may have not been able to have found it . I have seen some old members already, so that is cool you are all still around, and seeing that the community has gown is great. Last April, my son and I moved to a bigger city in California, i can't believe it has nearly been a year. My son has autism with intelectual delays, and is now 19 years old. I'ved raised him all alone as a single parent since the day he was born, the father could not decide what to do, so I made the choice to cut all ties, because it was not going to work out. I worked as a preschool teacher for over 20 years, until I backslided into a few serious mental health problems. I filed foe SSDI several years ago, was approved, and my son also has ssi with being a adult child dependent. I moved to Hanford CA so my son can have more oportunity as he becomes a little older for vocational rehab services and learn to work. Plus my biological younger brother relied on me too much emotionally, and was abusive, towards my son, that all came out after the move. Even though we are about 50 miles away, it is far enough not to be manipulated by him and his family. We have been here since April of last year, so far so good. I honestly had a deep hatred living in that very rural town , not much to do, gang infested, with a small % of whites, predominately mexicans who looked down at other races especially if you did not speak spainish, not to mention this is a extremely poverty strckin little town. Babies having babies to where the middle school had to place a infant daycare program. not a racist at all, just being honest. Still in therapy, with the same therapist who now makes home visits, and on psych meds. But, their has not been self injury in a while, and my focus has always been taking care of my son, and made changes to my weight, nearly losing 100 pounds , and yes I am overweight, trying hard to lose more weight , without going to far under, Since I've been anorexic before with bulimia, I've mostly have done it the right way, but use diet pills , exersice, change of diet. A few acts of purging though. We still have our yorkie,and shih tzu , with us too. Not as isolated anymore either, their are a couple friends i'll talk to on a daily basis, which is very different from where I was never out of the home. of course their are still demons to fight, such as paranioa, BPD, and even eye problems now. I believe that is why I came back here, needing support, dealing with other issues too, so no, not all is perfect, Never is.
  5. maybe it is a inner ear problem, however, the first thing that came to mind was dehydration. Glad he will be able to see a neuro, but 6 weeks is a long time to have to wait. I hope it is not anything too serious.
  6. my gosh, since not being on the fourm for a while because of moving and all the changes in the last few months I had not updated this topic. After moving my son began talking more about how my brother treated my son, he also began hurting himself, leaving large bruises on his arms and a huge on on his stomach, I asked him why he was doing this, his response was he wanted to remember how it felt like after his uncle Tim hurt him, a lot of things came out, and I did not even know how bad my son had been treated by my own brother, it was much worse then I knew, I believe my son began telling me after the move because he felt safer, since now living further away from them . Recently I cut all ties with my brother. I turned off my cell phone. disconnected my cell, and it came to my attention my brother was calling my son on my sons phone, tring to ask my son why mom would not talk to him that made me pissed off that he was talking to my son behind my back, and saying to my son that getting hurt physically is a part of growing up. Well it is not, and it is bullying behavior his own son is really bad news at 16 yrs old, not so much a bully but has been in kiddie jail before and laughs teases matthew, my son. I changed my sons cell phone number, an decided to just use one phone, bought more memory on his phone, matt can't take his phone at his program school he's in, soI can use that one. Tim has a suspended drivers lisence too, so he cannot drive all the way to our new place by himself, especially where we now live their are a lot more police . I am certain tim has gotten the message , he is such a A****.
  7. mscat

    Howdy

    Different things have been changing in my son and I lives, now coming back here I see many changes have occured. In fact I was not certain this was the right community , however recognized a few names. Which then I knew this was still here . In April, we moved, got out of a very rural , gang infested area, into a larger city that has everything we needed to live more comfortably. It also meets my adult son's needs, with his autism, and intelectual delays, he is in a Independant living program for disabled young adults ages 18-22. After that their are a few programs in this city he can to for job training services. Where we use to live did not have the type of programs my son needed. The majority of the decisions I've made as a single parent since day one have been about my son and what id the best thing for him. We are happier here , and still settleing down. Things have not all been wonderful though, mostly for myself, fighting inner demons and a lot of triggers.
  8. hellooooooo?

    images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQuGalGVTZBPMvfhrXrtvSP3P42Ueh5YupnvXEWySQbfTGe-Jxmbg

    Anybody home?

  9. Hi irmajean, I have not been back to this thread in a while and now see you are getting a new family member ! Congradulations It is important to keep her on the same food when you bring her home at least a month . Depending on what she is eating you may not have to change her diet. Their are a lot of super good premium kibbles out there . Some cannot be found at your local petsmart but some can, such as Blue Buffalo , or Wellness. These are quality foods. I feed mine Taste Of The Wild and they love it. I reccomend you to make a vet appointment soon after bringing her home, get her health checked out first , and the vet will look at her teeth. Teeth can be a issue moreso in smaller breeds. And in dogs over 3 years old. Hopefully your dog will already be fixed so you won't have to worry about that expense. I also reccomend getting her microchipped, if she already is you will need to call the company and update the information, like your address, and phone numbers. The best things ever as far as what kind of bone to buy is the Bully Stick, they are safe and digestable, and dogs go nuts over them. I take the bully sticks away when they become small to avoid choking . Never give chicken bones or turkey bones, stay away from any type of fatty meats , or tuna fish. Once you choose a good healthy kibble keep her on it as long as she is eating well and not gaining weight. ABout names , it is reccomended to use short names or two sylabale names for a dog, because it is easier for the dog to remember and respond to her name. I'll tell you a kind of funny fact, people tend to name their dogs that are curremtly the most popular baby names for that yr. So their are a lot of chole's , Maddie's, and Bella's. I asked my son about the movie wher etheir was a Beagle in it, he knows movies LOL, that dog was named Lou, so maybe Louise? that was on the movie Cats And Dogs . SOmetimes people take the wait and see approach and name after they have their dog for a while and then choose. My yorkie I have is Suzi and my shih tzu is Miely .
  10. Bigger dogs can suffer from bloat , it has something to do with their intestines your suppose to make the dog lay down afer he eats a meal for at least 30 ,minutes , so not let him get excited . Yes Bloat can be deadly so you would want to research this carefully if you decide on getting a large dog. if I had more room i would get a third dog. I love em so much, to me a dog is so much better then a human friend, they love you unconditionally no matter what , and can make you so much better when your sad. Dogs have a keen sense about these things, when i was recovering from surgery my dog never left my bed, she stayed perfectly still and it was comforting to have her right next to me. They are amazing and absolutely incredible. SO yes I am a big advocate of dogs. They will be your best friend always and forever.
  11. This is correct information, wait until your new dog is adjusted to his noew home and surroundings too. A dog gets a little stressed out during the transition, so it is best to try and keep things the same for a while. Their are so many super high premium foods out ther now days. Most are not goint ot be found at your local grocery store. Even the foods sold at the vet are not going to be the best kind, vets get a kickback from selling these products even though they are not quality such as Science Diet. A good food would be like taste of the wild, Wellness , Blue Buffalo . DEpending if on if you get a puppy just feed a puppy formula becasue this have more protien for a growing body. When switching to a new food mix it in a little with her old food, this will avoid any stomach upset . Aslo once you and your daughter choose a dog it is important to take the dog to the vet for a exam , so you know your new dog is healthy .If she is a puppy you can sart her vaccinations at that time too.
  12. danni, I saw on tv a Great Dane who was a lap dog, LOL. just like the little dogs they do not realise how small/big they really are. horses are absolutely beautiful , i have not ever owned one, but have rode of them , they intimadate me a little by their sheer size and strengh. IrmaJean, your daughter is going to be thrilled to have a dog! Maybe you could allow her to start getting supplies for the new family member. She would love that. that was one of my favorite things to do when i fifnally had my puppy , their are too cute things just for one small dog. Where I live in shelters, are filled with Chi's and pitbulls it is so sad. Pitbulls are a little harder to adopt out due to their aggressive nature, or what is heard in the media. Try and check out Petfinder.com that is anther really good resource. Make sure your daughter or you do not go to a petstore for a puppy/dog. That is the worst place , many of the dogs are from puppmills and have either illness or behavioral problems. If you decide to go through a breeder then find one who is reputable. DOn't fall for any of those "designer" breeds either, that is a marketing ploy that breedres use to jack up the price and sell a mixed breed pup. Never buy over the internet either, many are scams and want a tremendous amount of money that is not worth the expense. Saty away from and emails that say we are on a mission in Africa and have a puppy we cannot keep, or it might say they are from Camroon, all of those are complete scams, and have been on the internet for years now.
  13. Irmajean, I have 2 small breed dogs, one is a yorkie , and the other is a shih tzu , my shih tzu is a total lap dog, very sweet and likes to be near me all the time. Our yorkie is very attatched to my son, it has become 'his" She is also extremely sweet and loves to give kisses. Yorkie's are hyperactive though and do bark a lot. I think your daughter will be so happy to get a little dog. Anther great place to look for a perfect little dog would be at a shelter , these dogs are in desparate needs to find good homes, they have small ones too.
  14. I gre up having a family dog, but did not get my own until nearly 40. I see what i had been missing out. Personally my dogs are very theraputic, so sweet and loving, they are amazing. It is true that petting a dog releases endorphines , the feel good chemical in the brain. That is why digs make wonderful services animals and are used in therapy all the time. It can be a little stressful owning a dog, taking care of one, traing the dog, vet care, and grooming costs, but wiht all that it otweighs the love a dog has for you. i love it when we come home and my dogs are so happy and excited, they are so cute even if were are gone a short time they act like we have been gone days. I have two small dogs and they are very happy and well loved. they offer great companionship and your daughter will never feel alone having one. My disabled son is so attatched to our yorkie , and the yorkie is attatched to him , more then myself, so it is beneficial to him. i have a shih tzu who is the sweetest mild mannered little dog ever, she hangs out with me all the time and is never far away. Dogs give back 10000 times more then i ever knew they did, it has been a wonderful experience having them, I just wonder why I did not get them sooner in my life.
  15. Hey Darkness, welcome back ! Since you already had a social security card they can look that up , and issue a new one? If you have any old school ID's that should work? Just to tell them you are who you say you are? Your birth certifficate should help . I see where your stuck , but S.S should let you get your card>
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