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My penis is short and thin and I also have testicles retracted up into my body because of my tight scrotum skin. I love to have shaved pubes. My close up dick picks are often mistaken to belong to a underaged boy and are flagged. I am so extra small sized and I am so embarrassed by it. I feel like I have to be able to discuss the details of my tiny penis prior to any sexual play. [photo deleted by a forum moderator]

Hi there, I have just joined this forum so hi! My reason for joining this forum is actually because I went through a breakup very recently after 2 years. Before my relationship I went through a time where I nearly attempted suicide. It was my ex that stopped me. Now we aren't together any more I want to find my feet again but it's difficult because my mental health is on the down again and there's nobody around me to talk to any more. My ex learned exactly how to get me out of crisis every time but now I'm on my own it is really hard. So I'm struggling with being both alone and very lonely. Unfortunately none of the crisis chats ever seem to be online when I need them but someone pointed me in the direction of this forum. Right now I don't know the solution to this problem but I'm hoping I can get somewhere before I get back to the point I was at before my relationship, I just want people who genuinely make an effort to care. In more positive things about me, I have a cat who is very sweet, I love to bake and I am studying for a degree which is really hard but I'm hoping to graduate this year. Tick Tock

Hey... Just wanted to send a shout out to everyone who lives a lonely life like me. I am pretty drunk as I type this, so I'm gonna take my time and try to spell everything right I guess I'm posting here because I don't really talk to anyone about this kind of stuff. To start off, my penis, erect, is about 5 and a half inches and a decent girth I guess. But, I can't help but feel super self concious about it. I know it is basically classified as "average". Somehow, it doesn;t make me feel better about it. I read a lot of posts on here where people say it ruined their life and stuff like that, and I can totally sympathise with that. I wouldn't say that ,y life is ruined just yet, but I feel as though I'm heading in that direction. I just turned 25 years old and I've only had one girlfriend. Since I was about 13 or so, I thought that my penis was small. I now know, that that is mostly because of porn. A little info or background about my previous and only relationship so far... Kinda fell in love with this girl when she was my friends girlfriend. I kept my feelings completely secret from both of them. They eventually broke up. I tried to console both of them after the fact, but my guy friend became distant and wouldn't really talk to me. The girl told me that she had feelings for me and I told her that I did as well. We ended up dating. In the beginning, I was very shy and hesitant to do anything sexual because I was worried about the size of my penis and my weight (I was around 260lbs and 5 foot 11, so not super fat or anything, but self concious none the less). She made me feel good about myself and made me feel loved. We had plenty of sex in the early stages of our relationship, having sex up to 2 or 3 time a day. She eventually moved in with me and it was probably some of the best times I had in my life. I was 18 at the time and had no idea about how the world worked and such. I would go to work everyday and she only had a job for about a month out of the two years we were togeather. My ankle was all messed up so I was half crippled, but I went to work anyway. ( I am flat footed and it went untreated for many years and eventually lead to my ankle structure being all messed up, I dunno, medical stuff). I didn;t have enough money for a car, so I biked to work everyday. I am from Nova Scotion, Canada, so I even had to bike everywhere during the winter. She just played World Of Warcraft all the time and eventually didn;t really seem to care to much about my strugles. Anyway, she eventually became distant and said that I was "desperate for sex". We had a lengthy conversation about my need for sex and I didn;t think that having sex a few times a week was that crazy to propose or whatever. She basically said that I seemed too needy in the sex department. I said fine, I won't initiate sex anymore, I went 3 or 4 months without saying, doing or initiating anything of a sexual manner. When I finally tried to talk to her about it 4 or 5 months later, she complained that that was all I thought about. Note. I hadn;t mentioned anything of a sexual nature for multiple month prior to this. I ended up braking up with her because I felt like I was being used for my money. ( I was living at her mother's place at the time. paying for all of the groceries, the internet/phone bill and part of the mortgage on her mom's house. Anyway, I ended up breaking up with her because I felt like a tool. While it lasted, I felt accepted, loved etc.. All of that. But after the relationship, I felt like I was used. The entire two years we lived togeather, she worked for about a month. Basically at the end of the relationship, I felt used. She got her hooks in me with her love and kindness, and took advantage of my generosity. She always said that she loved me as I was, my weight, my penis size, everything. But by the end of it, I was left with a sense that she was using me for a place to live/ security or whatever. I felt lied to. She became so distant towards the end and I feel like I became just as her boyfriends before. People who only wanted her for sex, according to her. I knew then, and I know now, that she was a manipulator and wanted me to think those things. I know I am a nice guy and I wouldn;t want any woman to be just a sexual object or however you would describe it. I know I am a hard worker and it's not my fault that she lost interrest in me... Anyway............It's been over 5 years since I broke up with her and I've been alone ever since. I just wanted to share that with someone and I figured this is as good a place as any. Thank you to whoever read this and I'm sorry if I misspelled some words, for I am intoxicated at the moment. I find alcohol makes me feel good... I have been alone, and without sexual contact for the past 5r years or so. People tell me that I am funny and charismatic. But truly, I always feel ashamed of myself and self concious. Even when female friends invite me to lunch or a movie or something, I feek ashamed and scared. Hopefully I am making sense right now to someone. I feel so good when I make people laugh, but any mention of sex or sexuality makes me feel depressed. I'm, sure some of you guys know what I mean by that. I hope to someday find a woman whome I can love and be with. But for now, I live a life of loneliness and depression that nobody knows I live.

(A quick note; This started out as my ramblings to myself in an email to myself. As I went on I thought that maybe there is help out there. Also there are a couple references to me being a diabetic without clarification. now you know. Thanks for reading.) You are not a victim. although life seems to be at a high lighted low there has to be more out there from you. Death is not an option at this point so stop killing yourself. you have intelligence so use it. Quit being everything that you despise. Nothing will be easy but things still must happen. Your sadness makes me sick. How can I change myself? Change by me for me is needed in my life, desperately! Im so tired of hating myself. Every car that passes I deep down inside wish it would have hit me. I realized the other night something. I was about to go to bed and then I asked myself... should I take my medicine? my answer: No, lets shave another year off my life. What in the fuck is the matter with me. I have been unconsciously killing myself for years. Is it because I hate myself? Is it because I do not think I am cut out for this life? Is it because I am too weak? So many questions I have about myself. Im 25, you would think I would know about myself. I dont. This is the longest string of misery I have gone through that I can remember. Its not that they are all bad days but just no sun shine in the skies. My life feels like a waiting room for death. I fear responsibility. I hate dependency and yet i position myself for no independence. I know what I want but take no action to get it. I know where I want to be but I take no moves to get any closer. Im 25 years old and I live with my parents. I own practically nothing. I can not drive and more than likely never will again. I can not have my own bank account. Every obligation or contractual agreement I have ever had I have failed at. Any goal I have ever set for myself I have come far short of. Every relationship I have ever had I have failed at. I have very very very few friends. I have never been consistent with anything except failure. I want more than anything to be better, or so I tell myself and yet every day that goes on, nothing changes. All of this is so true that it hurts. . . almost suffocates my thoughts. The ONLY good I have done in my life is love and care for my puppy and even still... he has not been to the vets since I got him. He was never neutered. I say I want nothing more than to be better but if that were true wouldnt I be doing something about it? I think what I want more than anything is selfishly, to be dead. Because consistently, I am doing things towards that. In my eyes, I am worthless. I do not deserve the pitty or the charity give to me. I feel terrible as I am a burden to any ones life that I am in. They are blinded because I am their son/family. I wish they could see how worthless I am. It amazes me how I can have such a level head on my shoulders and still allow myself to be such dirt. I know better. I know what I need to do. I know I know I KNOW and yet... nothing. there should be nothing more to this than just doing what i need to do and yet that is not it. or something is seriously holding me back. and I know that something is myself. I am functional. I make my bed everyday. I fold my laundry. matching socks. I dirty a dish and then clean it. but everyday its like my own misery is consuming me. I can focus less on everything that matters and focus more on my self loathing and the day dreams of dying fill the empty space between my thoughts. my dreams used to be hopeful and now they have become lonely. I have tried meds...nothing. I exercise regularly...nothing. Ive tried to find religion but i can not believe. I am losing any and all hope. I just want to be better. Please help

Okay, so I joined the mentalhelp/mentalsupport community almost an year ago, but after several afterthoughts I thought that perhaps I wouldn't need any help and that I should try to live my life by myself. I've been going by that for the entirety of the past year. The thing now is that now I'm starting to realize that I need help, and if not help, I at least needs lots of advice. Okay, I will try to keep this pretty short, and not too wordy. Around June of the past year, I started becoming a more emotional guy, and a lot of the emotions I usually kept bottled up inside me started coming out, and didn't really care about many people before that time, but afterwards I totally changed and I really started have more expressive emotions. I think this was due to a lot of things going on in my life at that time that didn't allow me to keep all those emotions bottled up inside me, so I had to become more expressive. At least, that's what I think. So, afterwards, in August 2011, I started school, and I had a decision to make about who I would be closer friends with and such, and I changed those who I hung out with frequently, choosing to go with those who were more understanding. Anyways, I made a mental note to myself that if were to be really close to a girl or date a girl, I would do it on the sole basis of personality and not looks because that is what I believe in. Other than that, school and everything else went successfully. Anyways, this girl (Lucy, for anonymity) indeed did show up in my life who had an awesome personality, and the way we met was that she was having relationship problems with her boyfriend that that time, and I totally liked the person that she was. Anyways, she would come to me about the things in her relationship that were bothering her, like her boyfriend calling her fat, or their many breakups. I tried my best to help her, and to be there for her. After a few months we became best friends and we ended up trusting each other a lot with almost everything in our lives. Every little thing we would share with each other. Sometimes staying up until 2 or 3 talking or messaging. Now, this was just the start. It was a great friendship, but I didn't really think about an actual relationship with her until much later, not only because she was already dating someone, but also because it was just a really really good friendship and I didn't think about it like that, I just wanted it to last, perhaps forever. So it was February 2012 that she said she broke up for good with this guy that she had been having a sort of a cyclical relationship with. After her breakup, I think we became closer friends. Anyways, she said she wanted to date another guy afterwards, and I advised her, no, on the basis that he wasn't right for her, but also that I would miss her and our friendship, and that no guy would ever be good enough for her. This prompted her to ask that if she would have to be "forever alone" and I replied that we could be forever alone together. Now, that was a joke, but that was about it. The March 2012 came along and we were just really really good best friends. We talked a lot, again about almost everything in our lives. We just trust each a lot, almost completely. That's what I wanted, and I guess I kind of wanted that, what ever that was to last... forever if possible. Now, beginning of April came and she said that she something to tell, but didn't want me to get mad about it, I said okay, and it was that she was going to start dating her ex again. Now, the thing is when things are really good with her boyfriend, our friendship doesn't matter that much, and I told her she shouldn't be dating her ex, but she said that I was just jealous that her dreams were coming true, and that she was finally happy. After hearing that, I distanced myself a lot from her, but we still talked because of school. We just started having a few conflicts because we didn't agree on somethings. Anyways school ended in June 2012 and I dropped all contact with her for about three weeks, but after replying to a few messages, she profusely apologized to me and said that she needed me back as a friend saying she was on the verge of tears about losing our friendship. Now, earlier (February) she had promised she wouldn't go to her ex if it meant risking our friend/relationship. Anyways, end of June, I just couldn't do anything about it, I agreed to be friends with her. Truth is, I missed her, I felt lonely without her. Now July has gone by, and I feel like I've already lost a part of her because she's with someone. Recently, she asked if we could go to college together, and even suggested we could dorm together, but I don't know what to do. And I've just been overthinking a lot about life and our friendship. I don't know what to do. I'm not really sure what I want. I feel weird. I need some kind of help or advice about how to go about this. I'm just really really confused, and this entire situation seems to be affecting me much more than it should.