Jump to content
Mental Support Community

how do you grieve?


SoccerCoach88

Recommended Posts

So my nana just died. I was there for her last breaths. I am having a really really hard time coping with her loss. What do you guys do??? For me it was having a couple of hours and then I had to go back to school the next day, and deal with various other things that seemed so insignificant when they really weren't. My doctor always says "no time for self-pity"... I don't think that I'm in that stage though, I'm not sure if he's getting the fact that I'm trying to I guess learn how go grieve if that makes sense. In a way I'm still in the denial phase. The funeral is this weekend I guess what is when it might hit me. How do you guys grieve or is there no way of really doing it because its all different? I feel so lost and hopeless in this circle.

Thanks.

Best.

Kate C.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi, Kate. Grieving is a struggle and the path is often uneven. You have to find your own way through it and this can take time. I think that it is okay to allow your emotions without self-judgment. One thing that has helped me personally has been recognizing what the other person brought out in me. It may be a while before you are able to do this if the pain feels too close. The pain will ease in time, though this doesn't always happen in a smooth pattern.

Our capacity to love is boundless, and there is always the potential to discover new places within ourselves that we hadn't known existed. When we love another, we discover ourselves. The love you felt for your nana remains with you. This gift is one you may share again with others. You can remember her by continuing to live your life.

Try taking it one day at a time, Kate. Talk about your nana, remember her, cry and laugh...It will get easier, little by little. Do you have support in this? I hope that you do. Please take gentle care. I am sorry for your loss.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

For me, I'm finding a lot of sarcasm in my grief. I also have found some interesting emotions in me. For sarcasm for example, if one of the flower places calls, and my parents asked who was on the phone, I'll tell them something like "oh they'll be delivering reminding you your nana died flowers".... or For a while they kept the sympathy and condolences cards up, and I just took them and piled them up. I called them reminding me my nana died cards. I'm confused if this is anger, or just the way I deal with things. For me, usually I'm the funny one the one to make people laugh when I don't try... Now it's just like sarcasm is most of what comes out of my life.

THe funeral is tomorrow, and I don't know if I'll actually stay in the church or not. I mean I was there for the hard part, when she actually died but for some reason I don't think I can do this. I guess I'm confused about life right now.

Kate C.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...