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Are pets therapeutic?


IrmaJean

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My eldest daughter (15 years of age) suffers from very many of the same struggles that I did for much of my life. She is socially anxious and quiet and has great difficulty even speaking away from the home. She is terrified of doctors. She still often carries around small stuffed animals for comfort. At home, she is a joy. Happy and chatty, with a great sense of humor. She loves reading and is an amazing artist! We tried therapy, but she did not speak (I mean not one word :D) to the therapist after many sessions. She has been opening up to me more and more so I am getting a good understanding of where she is coming from. She does a lot of catastrophizing around school and what terrible things might happen. She has great difficulty speaking up for herself when she needs to. She's very anxious and often shuts down around large groups of people. The kids in school often tease her for being so quiet. She is usually left alone to do work because no one chooses her for groups. she has a few acquaintance type friends and one very good friend who has been a friend for many years. I've been trying to help her and have recently considered that maybe family therapy might help her to relax about speaking. Maybe if she sees me talking openly, it might help her to talk. We are close and always have been. She seeks me out and enjoys spending time with me.

E loves animals. She wants a dog and has wanted a dog for many years. So lately we've been watching The Dog Whisperer together. This guy is amazing!! He uses a lot of psychology and often to help the people involved with the dogs. E has always been closed off to listening to any psychology, but I think now her mind is opening up to it. I honestly never realized that people had such an effect on their dogs' behaviors. Very interesting stuff. I think we are both learning a lot about human behavior and dog behavior watching this show. I am wondering if owning a dog might possibly be therapeutic for her. She told me we could both "work on stuff" together. I wonder if she is trying to soften me up to the idea. :) I get so attached to pets. I worry and stress about them and don't know if I want the added concern at this point. But it could be helpful to my daughter. I'm wondering what others' thoughts and experiences are? Could owning a dog be therapeutic for my daughter? What are the possible benefits to her? I am still trying to decide...:confused:

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My eldest daughter (15 years of age) suffers from very many of the same struggles that I did for much of my life. She is socially anxious and quiet and has great difficulty even speaking away from the home. She is terrified of doctors. She still often carries around small stuffed animals for comfort. At home, she is a joy. Happy and chatty, with a great sense of humor. She loves reading and is an amazing artist! We tried therapy, but she did not speak (I mean not one word :D) to the therapist after many sessions. She has been opening up to me more and more so I am getting a good understanding of where she is coming from. She does a lot of catastrophizing around school and what terrible things might happen. She has great difficulty speaking up for herself when she needs to. She's very anxious and often shuts down around large groups of people. The kids in school often tease her for being so quiet. She is usually left alone to do work because no one chooses her for groups.

A lot of teens go through stages like this, but it looks like E's difficulties socializing with others and being very shy and quiet have nothing to do with her age.

E loves animals. She wants a dog and has wanted a dog for many years.

So does my daughter. But her desire to own a pet has a lot to do with not having any siblings. She wants a friend to play with.

So l I am wondering if owning a dog might possibly be therapeutic for her. She told me we could both "work on stuff" together

Yes, I believe that animals can be very therapeutic because they bring a lot of comfort and very warm feelings to their owner. They will also never betray, are very loyal, won't judge or make fun of you. What I am trying to say is that animals have a lot of qualities that humans don't. Most likely E will end up opening up to her puppy which eventually can make her feel more confident and comfortable around her peers and people in general.

I get so attached to pets. I worry and stress about them and don't know if I want the added concern at this point

I totally understand where you are coming from. Owing a pet is a big responsibility and that is the reason why I am not getting my daughter a puppy. Plus we are both gone all day and we live in the apartment without a patio or a balcony.

But it could be helpful to my daughter. I'm wondering what others' thoughts and experiences are? Could owning a dog be therapeutic for my daughter? What are the possible benefits to her? I am still trying to decide...:confused:

Yes, true, it might be very helpful to her. I think that you have to weigh all pros and cons before you decide.

I hope i was helpful a bit.

Edited by Lana73
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Thanks, Lana. :D

You're right in that this isn't a phase with E. I first noticed the behaviors at around age 2 and things got worse as she approached her teenage years. My therapist had even suspected a form of autism, but I still don't think so. It would be easy to think that seeing her when she is shutdown, though. She doesn't make eye contact and won't engage at all. I think her behaviors have leveled off and haven't worsened over the past several years, but I would really like to help her feel more comfortable with herself. I am also hoping that she learns by watching my gains.

I was hoping a dog might break down some barriers and help her to open up, be less inhibited. The added responsibility could also help her to feel more independent, capable, and confident. I will do some researching and think more about this.

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I've had pets my entire life, my own, being a terrier i got for my 4th birthday. That dog was my shadow for 14 years (keep that in mind). Ive seen pets do amazing things for kids. Or anyone, really. Have you ever seen those therapy dogs they bring into hospitals, and nursing homes? Its pretty remarkable the impact the animals can have. A dog, however, when you dont have any others, can be a big jump in committment. Does she have any interest in getting a hamster (or something of the like). Sometimes thats a better way to start off, since they can stay at home unattended for short times, and kids get a sense of the responsibility involved. Have also pet-sitted? Pet-sat? an awesome guinea pig... it was like a dog. Keep em socialized...

=)

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Is your kitty causing you problems, epp? I have always loved kitties.

Hamsters? She loves them, yes. Sunflower Seed, Pumpkin, Cookie, Cashew, and Raisin. We've had several over the years. They only live 2-3 years. Also had a bunny rabbit for about 10 years and a cat for 16 years. There are only fish left now.

E's close friend has 3 guinea pigs. That's one pet I've never owned. As a kid, I do remember the comfort I felt having my cats nearby. We'll see...

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By all means are animals theraputic!! Many studies have even shown this, many take dogs into nursing homes..the patients there calm and blood pressure drops as they are petting them.

I love the dog whisperer,,LOL I need him to help me with my terriers. He is one of the best psycologist out there IMO not just with dogs..but people too..I love one of his episodes he did a time ago where he had the horse whisperer Perelli on his show together they were amazing..

Anyway I don't know what I would do without my animals..the always are there to calm me..the dogs make sure I get out and exercise, the horse bring me to such a calm of meditation I can't even describe..there are many types of service dogs,,not just for the physically handicapped but for emotionally as well..even dogs who can alert their owners who suffer from siezures and will alert them that they are about to have one. My mom's cat is so devoted to her and works hard to comfort her..he will even wake me up if she is experiencing extreme pain or distress..he hardly leaves her side, he even let me now of a bad UTI she was having one time. There is equine therapy too for emotionally troubled kids. The experience of being on a horse does amazing things for them..they come to life.

If not ready to get a dog yet, perhaps there is something she can do..as to first help out at a shelter, help an elderly person walk their dog or something like that. But yes..animals provide so many things.. I too was an only child, but I had many animals around me all my life. I even have my rabbit, Mimzy..such a charactor and soo snuggely.

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I am leaning toward maybe giving this a go in the spring time. I love animals too, but I am just afraid of being stressed out worrying. Fearing my fears? :confused: Life is about living, though, and risk. So I will think now about what kind of dog would fit best with our family.

Yes, I think if Caesar from Dog Whisperer were my therapist, I'd be attached within an hour. :o Calm, assertive energy. I need to work some on that.

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Mmmm, I think almost anything can be therapeutic, or counter-therapeutic; it depends what the person does with it. Still, a pet, especially an affectionate one like a dog, is another relationship, and we all know that relationships are therapeutic (except when they're not ...) After all, that's the assumption behind the existence of this site, that people learn in relationship to others (and pets count.)

In particular, a dog that E picks out avoids her obvious difficulty with people, at the moment. Something like that might get through her defenses and show her how to open her heart ...

Dang, I almost sound pink. ;-)

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Yes, I think if Caesar from Dog Whisperer were my therapist, I'd be attached within an hour. Calm, assertive energy.

ya. Calm, assertive, and HOT!

ooo the dog analogies...so many places i could go with that. but just for you Mark, I'll keep them to myself...however i did mention to Sue yesterday that

A bitch is a female dog.

Dogs bark.

Bark grows on trees.

Trees are nature.

Nature is beautiful.

And So is Ceasar Milan.

=j

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Ah yes, the wisdom of children (though I'm not so sure about Ceasar Milan. Hotness tends to vary by individual taste.) :-P

I love dogs, Jai. Though I can't reasonably have one of my own at the moment, when I'm out walking, I greet the dog more than its walker. It's possible I have dog genes ...

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I gre up having a family dog, but did not get my own until nearly 40. I see what i had been missing out. Personally my dogs are very theraputic, so sweet and loving, they are amazing. It is true that petting a dog releases endorphines , the feel good chemical in the brain. That is why digs make wonderful services animals and are used in therapy all the time.

It can be a little stressful owning a dog, taking care of one, traing the dog, vet care, and grooming costs, but wiht all that it otweighs the love a dog has for you. i love it when we come home and my dogs are so happy and excited, they are so cute even if were are gone a short time they act like we have been gone days. I have two small dogs and they are very happy and well loved. they offer great companionship and your daughter will never feel alone having one. My disabled son is so attatched to our yorkie , and the yorkie is attatched to him , more then myself, so it is beneficial to him. i have a shih tzu who is the sweetest mild mannered little dog ever, she hangs out with me all the time and is never far away. Dogs give back 10000 times more then i ever knew they did, it has been a wonderful experience having them, I just wonder why I did not get them sooner in my life.

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Thanks so much, mscat. I'm thinking of a smaller type dog and hoping it will be helpful to E. :)

Malign: Go ahead and embrace your pink. Pink is beautiful. :o

Jai: Have to agree with you about Cesar. I find him rather appealing too. The soft, gentle voice, perfect posture, nice smile...Umm...Seriously, though, what he teaches has offered me new perspective and that's always a good thing.

Okay then, back to puppies. :)

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Shanrucas is right on. There is lots of research out there regarding the therapeutic positives that animals can have. When I was getting certified in EAP (equine assisted psychotherapy) Watching the people with the horses and seeing such amazing transformation is something that warms my heart to this very day.

But....aside from research.... Pets can be a wonderful way to help E come out of her shell. I didn't even know most of my neighbors names until I got a dog!! But having Gabe was an ice breaker not just here but anywhere he's with me. Plus he's a great companion. He's made of velcro so he's always attached. (except when the cats won't let him :o )

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Thank you, everyone, for your thoughts on this. :o I think this is in part about me getting past a fear of mine to take a chance with this. I think this will be great for her. :) I mentioned it to her and her face lit up. :) It will be a very loving home for the dog of her choice.

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Irmajean,

I have 2 small breed dogs, one is a yorkie , and the other is a shih tzu , my shih tzu is a total lap dog, very sweet and likes to be near me all the time. Our yorkie is very attatched to my son, it has become 'his" She is also extremely sweet and loves to give kisses. Yorkie's are hyperactive though and do bark a lot. I think your daughter will be so happy to get a little dog. Anther great place to look for a perfect little dog would be at a shelter , these dogs are in desparate needs to find good homes, they have small ones too.

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mscat. I have a lap dog too!!! He happens to be 60 pounds but he is still very much a lap dog. I'm still trying to break it to him that he can not be a lap dog while I'm driving. He's not impressed!!

We are playing snuggle puppy right now. My favorite game!!

IJ....I understand the fear as well. Bad things can happen and pets do die eventually. But....from personal experience. When my horse "danni" died (my screen name inspiration) after having her for 25 years, it was the most devestating thing that had ever happened to me. Worse than the abuse/rapes. It was absolutely paralyzing at the time. I had never been an adult without her. I got her when I was 12. But.....after the initial grief happened and I could look back more objectively.....I realized that despite the incredible hurt I was feeling, I wouldn't give back even one minute of the time I had with her. She was so special to me and I cherish now every second I had with the gift of Danni.

Edited by danni
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E likes Yorkies, so thanks for that info, mscat. I'd probably want to stay away from hyper and barks a lot... 60 pound lapdogs might be questionable as well. No offense to Gabe. :P

I'm glad that you had such a wonderful bond with Danni. I've never owned a horse, but I have ridden one a few times...way back when I was around 12.

I've always had a special bond and connection with animals, but my comfort zone has always been with cats. I spent a lot of time observing them as a child and I understand their body language very well. I haven't owned a dog since I was a teen. I feel much more informed about them now, though. When I think about it, this could also be a great way to give us quality family time together and get some exercise too. We've been browsing the shelter web sites. Lots of chihuahuas and pitbulls. E is so excited already, she's having trouble talking about anything else.

Edited by IrmaJean
words out of order
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danni, I saw on tv a Great Dane who was a lap dog, LOL. just like the little dogs they do not realise how small/big they really are. horses are absolutely beautiful , i have not ever owned one, but have rode of them , they intimadate me a little by their sheer size and strengh.

IrmaJean, your daughter is going to be thrilled to have a dog! Maybe you could allow her to start getting supplies for the new family member. She would love that. that was one of my favorite things to do when i fifnally had my puppy , their are too cute things just for one small dog. Where I live in shelters, are filled with Chi's and pitbulls it is so sad. Pitbulls are a little harder to adopt out due to their aggressive nature, or what is heard in the media. Try and check out Petfinder.com that is anther really good resource. Make sure your daughter or you do not go to a petstore for a puppy/dog. That is the worst place , many of the dogs are from puppmills and have either illness or behavioral problems. If you decide to go through a breeder then find one who is reputable. DOn't fall for any of those "designer" breeds either, that is a marketing ploy that breedres use to jack up the price and sell a mixed breed pup. Never buy over the internet either, many are scams and want a tremendous amount of money that is not worth the expense. Saty away from and emails that say we are on a mission in Africa and have a puppy we cannot keep, or it might say they are from Camroon, all of those are complete scams, and have been on the internet for years now.

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A Great Dane lapdog??:eek: That would have to be awkward. :P

Thank you for all of the information, mscat. It's great that you and your son find comfort in your dogs. :)

We've been looking through Petfinder.com. You just punch in your zip code and all of the available pets show up. I'm thinking we are going to go that route and just keep looking until we find a dog that seems to be a match. We also went to Petsmart and looked at dog equipment. I'm going to need to educate myself about the healthiest food to buy. Maybe it would be a good idea to buy something, though, to help me get over the hump with my fears in this.

Thanks again.

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regarding what food to buy. There are recommended brands but the best thing to do in the beginning is to find out what food they are currently eating to keep their diet consistant. New food should be introduced slowly.

This is correct information, wait until your new dog is adjusted to his noew home and surroundings too. A dog gets a little stressed out during the transition, so it is best to try and keep things the same for a while. Their are so many super high premium foods out ther now days. Most are not goint ot be found at your local grocery store. Even the foods sold at the vet are not going to be the best kind, vets get a kickback from selling these products even though they are not quality such as Science Diet. A good food would be like taste of the wild, Wellness , Blue Buffalo . DEpending if on if you get a puppy just feed a puppy formula becasue this have more protien for a growing body. When switching to a new food mix it in a little with her old food, this will avoid any stomach upset . Aslo once you and your daughter choose a dog it is important to take the dog to the vet for a exam , so you know your new dog is healthy .If she is a puppy you can sart her vaccinations at that time too.

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Yes, thanks for the reminder. New foods can cause tummy troubles if introduced too quickly. I was wondering about dry vs. canned. When I was a child we had a dog die from bloat, which I thought was caused by the swelling of dry dog food? I might be wrong about that. I'll try not to spin my anxiety worrying about the dog we don't even have yet. :)

Should we move my thread to the lounge? It's up to you, but all the dog information is very helpful to me. Thanks. :)

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