Favorites and fairness

[frazzled1]

My grandmother had 6 children and though the youngest is now 41 they still complain about favoritism.

I am 40 I have 4 children and I am here to tell you that each of my very different children have a different mother. I had my 1st son at 17, I was scared and didn't know what to expect (from labor or general rearing). I muddled through the first year then got pregnant with my first daughter. I loved my little boy so much I was jealous for him before she was born. I was more afraid the 2nd pregnancy as I experienced some difficulties and I hated the physical and hormonal changes pregnancy causes. My boy had been a lap baby so I went the other way with my daughter. My son had both parents as an infant, my husband had joined the military and was away during my daughters infancy. I had a tumor with my third child and nearly died from it after her birth. My youngest was born 12 years later.

I don't treat them the same and I don't have the same relationship with all of them. I don't feel bad because I was a different person when each of them came into the world. And they each have grown into different people. There's no reason to feel guilty because I love them all.

[BlueAbaloneDog]

I loved that post! My kids complain about favoritism too, especially the oldest, and they all are opinionated about how I should be parenting the other ones. I say you're right, Boy#1 IS my favorite--right now. Yesterday Boy#2 was my favorite, and tomorrow Girl 1 may well be my favorite, etc. The truth is they all are my favorite, and I have ways of making each one of them feel special. But saying that each one has a different Mom really is true!!