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  1. 6 points
    Obsolete

    Resolute.

    I'll start by saying that if any of you, especially those of you that were really close to him feel that this post should be removed for whatever reason, let me know, I'll take it down as soon as possible. Res, you and I were not best buds. I don't even claim to know you well. I didn't. So why am I making a post of You? Because the little interaction I had with you on here, you were very kind to me. You made me feel welcome, you responded to my posts in a considerate and humorous manner. That's the you I knew. The little interraction I had with you meant a lot. I hope you have finally found peace mate.
  2. 6 points
    jazz

    Resolute.

    Thanks for this Obsolete. It's good to talk about Resolute, there was something special about him.
  3. 5 points
    Klingsor

    “Finally, A New Emoji...”

    I won’t go into detail but HR is working to get me moved to a position that requires minimal human interaction. If that doesn’t work out I’ve got some interviews coming up. Things are relatively ok and stable as long as all I have to do is go to work and come home. It’s when there’s traveling and meetings and non-routine bullshit that disequilibrium hits and all it takes is reading something like that Vice article to set me off. I found it at the worst possible time.
  4. 5 points
    LaLa

    “Finally, A New Emoji...”

    Isn't that an opportunity to find a new job? If you think the "culture" there would be the same, perhaps you could come there, among people who don't know you, with a made-up back-story, like being a widower (who's not ready to date anyone because of grief). I know it doesn't sound ideal, but it's just one of possible options; the one that quickly came to my mind. And I would say that even that seems better to me than giving up on life as a whole... I know it's subjective (-what is "better"). I know it's terribly hard on you to be in this situation, with these experiences. But you've been living in a bubble of stupidly biased (in their vies of masculinity and relationships) people, so you're also biased (because of them) in your view of people and possible relationships (thinking it's impossible for you to have friends among colleagues, for instance). Could you ask for help a social worker who would help to manage your search for a new job as well as searching for help with your mental health? I know it doesn't sound "appealing", but it might help, so who cares about apparences, fears ... I hope you won't leave the forum; you'd be missed and... possibly, you'd also miss some people from here. Hang in there, you're more a important person than you can see now...
  5. 5 points
    Sea182018

    Small victory

    So I’m kind of new here, only a month or so and a couple posts but I’ve been a long time reader. To recap my stats are 5.75 length and 4.5 girth not small and I have no issues with length but My main concern has always been girth. Last night my wife and I had sex and I was feeling more aroused than usual before. We both were able to achieve orgasm ( her with the help of a vibrator which I don’t care) afterwards she said something I have never heard in my life. She said that I felt really thick this time. It made me feel great. After a minute my normal negative thoughts kicked in saying well if I was bigger she would feel that all the time but for once I was quickly able to remove those feelings and be positive that i received a rare compliment. Small victory but a lot more hard work ahead
  6. 5 points
    jazz

    WhatsApp (Edit: Not Zoom)

    I hope you're not going to 'zoom' off and not use the forum anymore 🎌
  7. 5 points
    Klingsor

    "Outed" at Work/School: Coping

    Due to my inability to keep my temper under control and my gigantic mouth shut, I think I may have semi-"outed" myself at work RE penis size. Recently, Yoth informed us of his friend Tom's suicide because of SPS, a significant contribution of which was the harassment he suffered at his job. Yoth I believe has his own work-related experiences as well. I thought I'd make this thread to discuss ways to cope with the consequences of SPS at the two places where I think it's probably most damaging - work and school - simply because they're both like prison. You can't get away in most cases, whereas we aren't forced to mingle at bars or clubs or voluntarily accept abuse in social or informal settings. Yet.
  8. 5 points
    Small

    whining thread

    Thanks for reopening the thread @IrmaJean. And thank you @Klingsorfor writing that. It brought a tear to my eye. It's been a year since Resolute has left us. And I didn't want to let this day go by without mentioning him. I miss him, and to put it selfishly, my life would be a happier place if he was still with us. I find it so difficult to think about him. In my thoughts, I have avoided him all that i could. But in the moments i am overcome with a recollection of him - I first find myself smiling, before being overcome with heartache & grief. I truly miss him. Klingsor has spoken perfectly on his character & there's nothing I can add to it. He is one of the few people that lifted my moods every time we spoke. He actually listened, and knew to how to say the right thing. I don't claim to know the wonders of the universe, or the cycle of life, death & perhaps life again. But I am a believer in God - and I am also a believer in justice. So I hope & pray with all my heart, that no matter where he is, our friend Resolute has found peace. Klingsor: In truth, our final conversations were the darkest we ever shared, and i often wondered if it were better that we didn't have them. I hope that in time you're able to see things as they were, and be at peace with the matter: He loved you and spoke about you up until the very end. Maybe when our lives are over we can see him again and if we do, I know full well that he would greet you with a smile. I don't know what else to say. I still miss him, and I haven't allowed myself to mourn him either. Though he would deny it, i think he would appreciate being remembered by his friends. I feel privileged to have known him, and honoured for him to have called me his friend. RIP.
  9. 5 points
    This is probably appropriate for a New Year's post ... Ten years ago December 30th, I checked myself into a locked psych ward, feeling depressed and suicidal. The amusing thing is how quickly I felt better, isolated away from my ex. By the third or fourth day, folks around me were clamoring to get out; I was quite content in there. I still had to go back, and stayed with her for just over a year more. But, though I had some periods of depression that year, I found that I had begun to figure out that some things aren't worth what I was paying. And that's one heck of a useful lesson, right there: know what you can afford, what your limits are, when to stop struggling, acceptance of what you cannot change. Which brings up another memory of the hospital, one of my favorite: a woman who was there for alcohol detox wrote out on an index card for me the Alcoholics Anonymous Serenity Prayer (they borrowed it; it existed before.) I still carry it in my wallet, folded in half and ragged along the edge, as a reminder. Whatever you think of AA, or of prayers, it does contain a valuable message. God, grant me Serenity to accept the things I cannot change; Courage to change the ones I can, and Wisdom to know the difference. Acceptance, Courage, and Wisdom. Quite a toolkit.
  10. 5 points
    Obsolete

    Happy New Year Gentlemen.

    Wishing you wellness and happiness in 2018. 😉 Enjoy.
  11. 5 points
    Sheliewolf

    Small penis stigma video

    Your most welcome. Well I'm sheliewolf the same girl from the video and I appreciate all feedback and suggestions! I made the video and the YouTube channel because after seeing Laureen Harper's comment, I decided that I was going to finally take a stand against small penis stigma and male discrimination, because I realize that it's the current social acceptance of small penis stigma and body shaming that is the cause for why so many men with smaller sizes suffer from depression and self worth issues , because of how people treat them and I know it's never going to stop unless people take a stand against it. Whenever I see someone post a heart breaking story revolving around their size, I tend to feel a strong desire to help them and make them feel better but I realize as much as feel good comments and therapy suggestions help I know that it is not enough and is not a true solution to the problem especially when most of it stems from public discrimination encouraged by the media. I realize that the only way to truly solve this problem is to address it at its source. The way I see it, it's like telling a child who gets bullied in school to not worry and forget about how the bully makes him feel but without actually putting a stop to the bully. I don't understand how someone is supposed to suddenly stop feeling bad about themselves when they are constantly being put down. I definitely see it as a major issue that goes well beyond self image and confidence problems. That's why I'm gonna be putting all the effort I can to fight this stigma, and spread awareness especially because I don't see anybody else doing it. I will listen intently to anything anyone has to say on the matter , and I will take every suggestion Into consideration as long as it serves to benefit and empower you.
  12. 5 points
    I keep hearing everyone speak of their size her and it seems this may be a problem of the mind and not always size. Please don't take my comment wrong but what I'm saying is the guys saying 5 or 5 1/2 inches are having the same thoughts about size that I do. I'm barely a little over 4 inches on a good day. It appears we all feel the same even though we're different sizes. This forum is very interesting. I'm really learning about how this affects myself and others.
  13. 5 points
    Lodz

    New member here

    Hi @Introverted Mine hides away as well. Not all of the time, but it's never very far from turtling back inside. It sucks to be cheated on, but i don't think your size alone is the cause of that. Thanks for being brave enough to come on here and share. You're not alone.
  14. 5 points
    Try not to dwell on your wife having been with someone who had a bigger penis too much, it's particularly toxic and can slowly deteriorate an otherwise perfect marriage/relationship. And so what if some guy was bigger, she didn't marry him, she married you. I bet if she was to describe you she wouldn't be so harsh, she'd probably say a great husband and a loving father, not fat, hairy with little dick. If I was you, I'd talk to her about how you're feeling, it's staggering what people don't know about us even though we're convinced they do. She's your wife, your lover and confidant. I guarantee she'd be supportive and loving. Don't let it get in the way too much, I wasted a lot of time in the past living in fear and denial and it isn't worth the bother. And if the internet and blogs regarding penis size etc bring up anger then avoid them like the plague. I come here now for the odd grumble and to catch up with everyone suffering from this bollocks, if it made me unhappy or angry I'd drop it like a shitty flannel. Do what makes you happy, brother. ☮
  15. 4 points
    Small

    whining thread

    It's 2 years tomorrow that we lost our friend Resolute. RIP We miss you.
  16. 4 points
    Victimorthecrime

    What's the point?

    And just to expand on this a tiny bit - it's not our fault. It's important to realize that life is often hard and that is completely independent of anything we have done. There is only so much we can even impact much less control.
  17. 4 points
    YOTH

    “Finally, A New Emoji...”

    I know I have no right to be upset, it's your path, not mine. But we're friends, Kling. There's hope for you, we're the same size for Christ's sake. Please don't give up. But if you do, I get it and I'm not pissed off. It's just more fucking bullshit. I can't sleep, I'm thinking about you, then Tom, then you again. It's not your fault I feel that way, but it hurts anyway. Tell me what I can do and I'll do it. Come here and live with us, I'll put you up in the spare room for as long as you need (genuine offer, couldn't be more serious). Start a new life in the UK. Change your focus to something, anything until the cloud has passed. After that, if you're still wanting out, I'll kill you myself lol. Message me, mate. Or at least message someone.
  18. 4 points
    Thanks for responding Klingsor. I remember you hated that job. I wish I could quit mine. I guess things got unbearable there. Take a break. Get back to the job search as your able. Sometimes there are more possibilities than we at first see. I hear ya about being exhausted. Hope you catch a break. Keep us posted please.
  19. 4 points
    retr0john

    I wish you well

    I hope this holiday finds everyone well and content, at least for a little while. If you can please be with family or friends whom you love and care about. I've grown to like and care about many of you long time posters here, and while I know we have our troubles and on going problems know that I and others here do think about you and wish you well. Happy Holidays, and for those who celebrate Merry Christmas. John
  20. 4 points
    IrmaJean

    Ranting on about women

    I have never had such a conversation either; nor would I. I believe that when someone shares their vulnerability, this is something I would always want to respect and honor. I have shared my thoughts here many times over the years. My personal feelings about sex have little to do with the actual physical aspect and much more to do with the emotional connection. The act is a gift of sharing self with another. Physical intimacy would be about the gift of recognizing a person in this sense and the unfolding of that. My personal feelings, for whatever they are worth.. I have heard women make general type of rude jokes that I have found offensive. One time I told a co worker that they probably didn't realize how painful this could be for some men. Otherwise I would not associate with people who talked about others in this way.
  21. 4 points
    Daveuk

    Day 6. New week

    Been a peaceful day in again. Did a bit of tidying up cleaning the flat and clear headness
  22. 4 points
    Small

    whining thread

    Thanks for posting guys. Resolute would have appreciated us coming together to remember him. You guys meant the world to him - his on forum correspondence with us really gave him relief from his struggles.
  23. 4 points
    IrmaJean

    whining thread

    Your words are touching and I think they honor Res's memory. I didn't know Resolute very well on a personal level, but we did have interactions here on the forum. He was very witty and bright and he was supportive of members here. I think he taught me a lot, though I have only recently been able to fully realize this through conversations with my daughter. Thank you, Res. I'm not sure what follows death either, but I do believe a person's essence is always present to those who connected with them. I hope Res feels eternal peace. Resolute is missed and he is remembered.
  24. 4 points
    jazz

    whining thread

    I can't believe a year has passed already. Although I only knew Resolute through the forum and private messages, what did I learn about him? That he was witty, a deep thinker and supportive. He liked football, cars, jokes, discussions and fairness. I sometimes wonder, when various topics appear on the forum now, what his comments would have been - Res was not short of an opinion. If only we could have parachuted him away from his "unbearable circumstances" (his words.) A great loss.
  25. 4 points
    Klingsor

    whining thread

    Tomorrow August 20 will be one year since Resolute committed suicide. Small and I wanted to temporarily re-open his thread and say something. I hate sounding maudlin or saccharine so I'm just going to say what's on my mind. When I first joined the forum, I hated Resolute. I quarreled with him frequently and said some very stupid and embarrassing things to him. At some point, I'm not sure exactly when, we became friends. Although Resolute would joke and jibe, I never felt threatened by him or genuinely insulted. He always knew where to draw the line without being disrespectful. I frequently would bitch to him about other members privately (Roger, for instance), but Resolute never reciprocated. About anybody. He was truly one of the most honest people I've ever known, with no pretenses. He was intelligent and quick-witted, but not deceitful. He was also kind-hearted. He loved to debate me and also loved to discuss religion, philosophy, logic, etc. We had discussions on Skype that would last 6-8 hours that I really enjoyed. There are aspects of his life that he shared with me and Small and which I won't divulge here, but he truly had a shitty existence. Nothing he complained about was hyperbole or self-pity. The last 3 months or so, he turned me to the television program Fringe. Around this time, my grandmother died. I also finished my graduate program and started a new job. I was busy, depressed, and didn't get on Skype much. He loved voice chatting with Small and me, and I still very much regret that I did not make more time to talk with him. It still makes me feel like shit. I honestly don't consider myself a very good conversationalist on a voice call, and so I could never see how he could enjoy it. Thinking about it now, Small and I were probably the only human contact he had outside of his immediate family. I wish he was still here. But I understand the motivation. Not a day goes by that I don't want to cut my own throat. Resolute had his faults as we all do, but he was completely without pretense, deception, or hypocrisy. In a world of endless, walking contradictions, he was consistency, clarity, and logic. I don't know much else to say, other than that he showed me that good-natured companionship is possible with other people, something I had begun to doubt decades ago. Quote mining annoys me, but often you run across something that someone else has expressed superlatively well: “Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It's not something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven't learned anything.” ― Muhammad Ali
  26. 4 points
    I hope 2018 has been good to you so far.
  27. 4 points
    malign

    Poll - Why are you here?

    So YOTH, you're saying that the best advice is the opposite of "Go fuck yourself"? :-) This actually relates to the conversation above. Even if SPS were only a problem of society, people would still need emotional and psychological support to deal with how society makes them feel, because however hard you try, society will take some time to change. I would give similar advice to a minority individual facing societal barriers, because the barriers will be here a while, still. Support would take the form of listening to the person's feelings about the insults they receive, validating that the insults are unwarranted and do not mean that the person is less human, and talking with them about how to handle what the world tells them in the most constructive way possible. In other words, what this forum is here to do.
  28. 4 points
    2thin2win

    Girl of My Dreams

    @unsung your post hit home. this was my experience, back in the day and may not necessarily be yours: I remember dating a not so bright girl back when I was in my early 20's. I mean i've dated several not so bright girls but one stood out and was unbearable. She just didn't grasp the simplest concepts in life and did not understand anything about the real world; it was amazing how this girl even got along in life. As time passed (only dated for 3 months), I really didn't look forward to seeing her at all cause it meant I had to listen to her talk and everything she said was just weird. It became dreadful to see the girl after the newness wore off. Needless to say we broke up; I pulled a douche move back then, but I was young at the time. In time, you'll see that a girl's acceptance of your size will NOT be a reason to hold on to her. It may be a very tiny part of the equation, but in no way will you be in a long term relationship with someone that you can't talk to, or hold a decent conversation with. To me, holding a decent conversation trumps most anything else a girl has to offer. I talk to my wife every night for about an hour after we get the kids down. I couldn't imagine doing that with someone I didn't want to listen to; it would be constant dread. But again that's me, maybe not you. The age thing won't matter with the new girl. My wife just turned 19 when I met her and I was 28 so I don't believe age is really a factor (Although i'm starting to wrinkle and she still looks like a teenager; i don't like that too much. i attached our pic from last year so you see what i mean and where you will be heading with this 18 yr old). However, some of the things the new girl said that you posted are red flags to me. My wife would never have said those things that you mentioned in your post; she just doesn't talk like that. This girl sounds like all the other girls who made fun of me. The Asian part has nothing to do with it. These Asians now days are nothing like my mom (she was born in China) and old style Asians.. In this new age, a lot of them are wild, rebellious and promiscuous....even more so than white woman. I'm seeing my asian girl neighbor grow up and she hides her black boyfriend down the street and meets him to go out; her parents are divorcing over it. My advice for what it's worth: don't let size interfere with anything you do in life. You already know that it doesn't matter as you are experiencing that right now. If a girl throws shade on you cause of it, you are way better off to not have her in your life. Go date and have fun. There will be lots more girls in your life before you settle down.
  29. 4 points
    Victimorthecrime

    My pathetic stump

    @Fedupwithlife sorry to hear you are feeling this bad about things. You are right about the jokes but take it for what it is worth. Anyone that peddles is such fare is a talentless hack seeking attention. Our culture is extremely course and nasty. I try to tune it out. Sounds like your relationship w your wife is less than great and maybe you could work on that. I have never been married so not in a position to comment beyond that. Focus on yourself and what makes you happy. Many of us are not happy about our appearance and capabilities in life. But we get one shot at life and then we disappear forever so I vote for making the best of it.
  30. 4 points
    You guys are both bigger than me but yet I'm the happiest I have ever been the last few days. Chin up! Think positive! Not all of society cares about the size of your dick, I have proof of that in the form of the wonderful girlie who I literally cannot wait (like I can't wait) to swoop up for the weekend. She loves my dick (she even said that, although she is really good at saying things she knows I would love to hear lol) but I do know that she did get off with it (amazingly), so...anyways, I just wanted to post my positive story here to help battle all of these sad emojis I am seeing.
  31. 4 points
    malign

    Adult Imaginary Friend

    Hi, MDeCa. The first thing that struck me is that you left the rape until the end of your first post. I'm sure it has had a far greater effect than that on your life. Many survivors report having split off part of themselves (not exactly deliberately) so that the rest of them did not have to bear the full experience of what happened. Also, many, in order to feel more control over bad things happening to them again, try to justify the belief that they were to blame, so that there's something they can do differently next time. Unfortunately, it's not possible to prevent all the bad things that might happen to someone. More importantly, nothing someone might do could make them deserve rape. As to attempting to decide by yourself what diagnosis you might receive, there are several things. First, you wouldn't try that for medical conditions; abdominal pain could be appendicitis or an abdominal tumor or many other things. That's what docs are for. You don't have to follow blindly what they say, but their training is worth something. Second, the DSM is based on a concept of illness that's like scattering a bunch of bins over the landscape of human experience; if you fall into a bin, then you have that disorder. I don't think we're really like that. We don't have sharp cutoffs between health and illness. Moreover, I think there are continuums (continua, for Latin scholars) for many different traits, such as anxiety, psychotic manifestations, mood problems, and so on. I think a person can tell if they're obsessing over something, for instance, without them receiving a full OCD diagnosis. Third, you don't seem to have considered PTSD as an option. Leaving Ben out of it for a while, you said that you see and hear other things that you are aware are not in the outside world. You are aware of at least one occasion where you "lost time". You've been both suicidal and a danger to others. You describe experiences that you acknowledge are psychotic episodes. You've said that you're scared. Honestly, I don't care what you call it, those sound like a stack of good reasons to seek some kind of help. Now, my thoughts about Ben. Keep in mind that this is simply a person's opinion; use it only if it helps you. I think Ben is a part of you, whether you call him a spirit or a complex or an imaginary friend. That means that you can't be forced to give him up; he represents thoughts and feelings and skills that are yours and that you will always have. His characteristics helped you survive a terrible experience; they have value. But they're actually your characteristics, split off to deal with something the rest of you couldn't, at the time. You were thirteen. You did what you had to, and so did he. He took on the pain for you. Now you're twenty-one. You have resources you didn't have then. You have people who care about you; you have more experience; you seem to have considerable awareness. Personally, I think treatment would bring you closer to Ben than ever; in fact, it might allow you to re-merge with the capabilities he has, while allowing your gentler nature to temper the rage and desire to strike first that are causing you problems, hurting people you know wouldn't hurt you (including you.) Also, I don't think that your treatment would be medication alone. You've been through a lot, and I think that it will take a lot of healing before you feel, um, some kind of, safe again. Okay, end of opinion. I just hope that you will keep in touch, talk about the pros and cons, even let us talk to Ben if you think it would help. We've talked to a fair number of abuse and rape survivors; their stories are scattered around here. Maybe those other experiences can help you. That's why we have them recorded here, so that each survivor is not forced to start all over again. Finally, welcome, and take care of yourself until next time.
  32. 4 points
    Sheliewolf

    Small penis stigma video

    That is a good question. My husband has a small penis actually. It's never been an issue for me as i actually have a preference for small sizes, I prefer to have small over large, but he still has his insecurities.That's not the sole reason I'm doing this though. I am also a mixed race Hispanic Asian , I suppose you could call me a hispaisan. But being part Asian the racist aspect of small penis stigma has always bothered me on a racial level, and it has always been upsetting to see how the men of my race are treated based on the stereo type. But I would say what really initiated me was after googling small penis randomly one day and stumbling upon a small penis group on Reddit. Reading through all of the posts and comments in there about the experiences that they go through with having a small penis just really kind of hit hard. I felt a strong desire to reach out, which led me to create an account and begin posting on there. I would post alot of advice and talk about my relationship with my husband and how im someone who prefers small and many appreciated it, but there were also those who would thought my advice and feel good comments were useless because no matter what it wouldn't change societies outlook on them. And seeing those comments made me really think about things in depth and realize that they were right. While my posts may make someone feel good for the moment and my advice may help out individuals who have confidence enough to use it, in the grand scheme of things however just mere comments aren't going to make everyone's lives suddenly get better, Which is why I decided to take it all a step further and created the YouTube channel on order to advocate for a change in the way they are treated. Laureen Harper's comment and seeing no one do anything about it is what pushed me over the edge.
  33. 4 points
    Klingsor

    Forum Poll

    I call mine Limp Bizkit.
  34. 4 points
    LostBoy

    Being grateful

    I'm grateful for this community, as well. It has been very nice to openly talk about these painful topics that have been bottled up inside me. I'm also very thankful for my family and my health. Overall, I am a fortunate person.
  35. 4 points
    Klingsor

    Being grateful

    I hope everyone here is able to find something they can be grateful for, whether it's health or family or something else. I'm grateful to this community for allowing me a place to let off steam regularly. I don't return to work until next Monday and I'm supremely grateful for that.
  36. 4 points
    YOTH

    SPS Article (SPS Community Contribution)

    Peno-centric is good, but I would have went with Knobsessed myself.
  37. 4 points
    Lodz

    Forum Poll

    "I don't technically have a micropenis..." Let me see if that line works next time I'm at a bar. 😀
  38. 4 points
    Victimorthecrime

    Planning. I'm not good at it.

    I have never been very handy (to say the least) so anytime I do anything I feel proud. I managed to insulate a drafty window. Three years ago this window was so drafty that it caused a heating pipe to freeze and break shutting down the heat to the entire house and I froze my ass off. Since then I had an electric heater next to the pipe which stopped it from freezing so now I can turn it lower and save money. I wore goggles, a face mask and latex gloves the way the Flex Seal can instructed so proud that I had the good sense to do that. Now that I have confidence I can proceed to other protects w the Flex Seal. And various other small projects around the house.
  39. 4 points
    Lodz

    Small Penis 12 Step Group?

    It seems to make sense to me. Nothing I can do can relieve this suffering. When I put a little faith into it, and tell myself, I'll be fine if I just stop obsessing, I feel relieved. I have been in a 12-step program in the past and probably still should be. But I was never able to share my darkest secret and belief. I never felt safe sharing it, like I do here. But this is just a website. We can't see each other's faces. We can't give hugs. We can't see each other's tears and feel the warmth directly that way. Text is so cold, even at its sweetest. I wish there were a meeting I could go to for this and vent. But when I've googled it, all I've found is a joke site that just makes fun of our affliction, and one actual group (not a 12 step, just a support group) in New York City. But the stigma is so heavy that I don't think anyone would show up, except in giant metropolis' like NYC. It is the nature of this condition to be scared. To hide. To isolate. But we are here. We are breaking our isolation and bonding if only a little. If there were an in-person support group like this in your area, would you go?
  40. 4 points
    YOTH

    Small Penis 12 Step Group?

    I've thought of setting one up tbh, but as you say, who would go. We end up in the doctors reeling off the effects of SPS but never being honest with the cause. I'm depressed (pills) I'm anxious (pills) I can't work with this on top of the stress of working (get on with it). I'm suicidal (counselling) but I've done that, never told them why I was there. I'd dig through the back yard of my psyche pulling up skeletons from my childhood but avoid the corpse I'm living in. I'm really motivated to do something for all of us, but what? How can I help? I can't! I'm so wrapped up in my own misery and anxiety and depression that I couldn't help without a small loan of a million dollars. I don't know the answer. I'm not in a good place at the moment, I'm weaker than ever and acting stronger than I have for 10 years, I'm blagging and faking my life and I'm so tired. Mentally, physically, emotionally. I'm a husk of a thing.
  41. 4 points
    The first encounter with the mother of my kids was harrowing, I juiced the whole time (Cialis) and I'm glad I did. I was terrified because it was the first time I'd ever had sex without being drunk aka the first time I'd ever had sex I'd remember in the morning. Luckily we'd kind of fallen in love prior to sex so it wasn't a total deal breaker (although on the pills every encounter was successful), she's later said that she wouldn't have cared if I'd had a micropenis, that it wasn't important. But she's an absolute a gem, very rare, but these women are out there. It's probably 1 in 1000, just glad I found her. You just have to put yourself out there and trust you'll find eachother. I can't say you won't kiss a few judgemental frogs, but that's life, it's a numbers game.
  42. 4 points
    Female opinion/input weighing in here...first and foremost, I need to first say that EVERY VAGINA IS DIFFERENT, as are the women (and their preferences) attached to said vaginas. .Johnw, I can understand why you 'had a meltdown' over your size, because you say you have experienced mockery and ridicule. In the interest of blunt honesty, I say fuck (figuratively, of course) the assholes you are hanging out with, because they ARE NOT your friends if they continue to do this while knowing it is bothersome to you. Speak up and let them know this behavior is unacceptable, and if it continues then you need to find better friends because these guys are just mean and hurtful assholes. You deserve to be treated with compassion and respect. That right there will be the first step in improving your overall happiness. (I'm hoping that these people just made an offhand joke about your size once, you laughed it off in an attempt to not let them know it really bothered you, and now they think its OK because they've not been told differently.) Now moving on... Yep, dick size matters in sex. AND so do A FUCKING LOT of other things. Not gonna patronize you and say "use your hands, mouth, etc...(but those ARE great, just saying, lol) But in my handful of partners, the one I stuck with and married WAS NOT the biggest I had been with, he was the one who took the time to learn ME. Honestly, for me (and I know I'm not the only one) big dicks aren't all that. Powerhouse 8000, I can understand your plight too. Huge cocks can feel like a battering ram on a sensitive vagina. It hurts, and that's not enjoyable for either partner. The thing is, you gotta find the right girl for you and YOUR unique dick. Wanna know what women LOVE during sex/foreplay? A guy who will ASK and LISTEN TO what they like and feels good. And I don't mean shit like "Does my cock feel good, baby?" during the middle of sex. Corny, and definitely not a turn-on for me or most girls I know. (And yes, we discuss this, just like guys discuss girls. Its just a fact of life.) ASK HER where she is most sensitive. Pay attention to her reactions. Watch for her eyes suddenly rolling back, her mouth dropping open unexpectedly, or her hips lifting off the bed. These are great nonverbal clues that she's feeling good and you're bringing her pleasure. Move that dick around and try different stuff. Lots of women will not speak up and simply fake it or lie because they are too worried that if they say something they will hurt your feelings/ego. Because honestly, we know this is a VERY touchy subject for men, ESPECIALLY those who already feel inadequate. Let her know that you are willing to listen, experiment, and learn what gets her off. Because THAT is what will keep her satisfied and coming back for more. Some girls like doggy style because the penis rubs along the back wall upon entry, and also leaves the clit open for finger stimulation at the same time. Some like reverse cowgirl for the same reason. My preference (and honestly, the ONLY way I can orgasm during penetration sex) is to be on top, forward or reverse. You ever notice how when a chick rides you, she will swivel her hips? That's no accident, guys. Not only does it give a woman a sense of empowerment to be on top, but it also allows her to control where the friction goes and how intense it is. Because here's a little known secret... Lots of women don't even know how to get their own orgasm during penetration sex. But if they're on top, and something feels good, they WILL keep doing it until they cum. Vaginas are sensitive!! Sometimes, it will feel awesome until the friction gets too intense, then it just becomes uncomfortable. Letting her be on top allows her to change tactics if that happens. You on top/in control... Notsomuch. And you telling her when shes making you feel good will spur her on too. Something else... Some of my most intense orgasms have occurred during what my husband refers to as me "tip fucking" or "head fucking" him. Taking only his head/very tip in, sooo slowly, then bringing it out just as slow and dragging it up to my clit, then again slowly back in, just the very tip. FUCKING LOVE that shit. I will come hard and fast every. single. time. So length is not as big of a deal as guys think, if the movement is on point. (This particular technique is great for big OR small issues, BUT because the head of the penis is generally more sensitive it can be more difficult to maintain stamina/hold back orgasm for the man). Think about it... If she cums when you finger her, then as long as your dick is close to the same size as your finger it IS doable (with practice and trial and error). Ever hear the phrase "Its not the size of the wave, its the motion of the ocean"? NOT A LIE. Another fuckawesome thing is to penetrate her as far as you can, and then both partners alternately (or simultaneouasly) squeeze the genital muscles... without moving in or out. This feels SO GOOD, because there is the constant internal pressure combined with intermittent pleasure pulses when squeezing. I personally think it to be almost painfully enjoyable to see how long you can both stand this particular locked position, before your bodies start to wiggle for friction without your consent... And trust me, you WILL start to wiggle. Try having a friendly contest too see who can stay still and pulse the longest, and who caves and starts moving first. It's even more difficult for me to stay still if my husband is kissing my lips gently with his tongue, (almost simulating eating my pussy, but on my mouth.) Or sucking/pinching my nipples while we are locked still. Mouth lips and pussy lips have connected nerves, just like nipples and pussy lips. Thats why "making out" turns a girl on. And don't forget that some women NEED clitoral stimulation to orgasm. No matter how big/small/thick you are, it won't matter if you ignore her clit. And some women have a clit so sensitive that if you barely touch it during sex it hurts like a painful stabbing. Learn HER body and pleasure points. Consider vibrators...a lot have a ring of rotating ball bearings at the 5"-6" point. That's because the vagina is super sensitive at the opening, and not as much all the way deep inside. And most vaginas average 5"-6" deep before you hit the cervical wall, which can be painful for some girls. Rotate and/or wiggle your hips at full penetration to stimulate that opening. COMMUNICATE with each other, people are not mind-readers!! All that being said, If you're too embarrassed or insecure to ask and then accept/alter if something isn't feeling good for her, then your sex life isn't going to improve no matter what until you get past that. Hope this insight was at least minimally helpful. If not, hopefully it was at least a little entertaining, lol.
  43. 4 points
    YOTH

    Why, how & when to Flirt - short video

    Yeh, I'm ok @Obsolete Just muddling through, work is keeping me busy. Had a few off/rough days there but they passed thankfully. Just trying to keep focused on the positive.
  44. 4 points
    Obsolete

    I hope you guys are doing well.

    Hey Vic. I'm glad you're ok. I'm doing just fine myself. I'm no longer hating on myself and wishing I never existed. I'm taking a lot better care of myself these days. I'm nowhere near where I want to be though. There will always be things that bother me, things I can't change but hey, I believe it was you who used to say this often - "it is what it is"-.
  45. 4 points
    YOTH

    It's been one year since my first post...

    @Small Ok, I'll count myself lucky then lol. It does sound cheesy some of my posts, but this is the first summer I've actually gone out and lived normally in about 10 years. It's been the best summer on recent record for me where I've said yes to meals out, shopping, walks, going the park, coffees in the day time etc. That sounds cringey af but it's been a reality for too long. I'm not saying it's directly because of the forum, but it defo played a part in the whole accepting myself.
  46. 4 points
    Obsolete

    Diet/Gym/Health/Sanity

    Started my banting diet some weeks ago, I've lost around 3-4 kilos so far. I intend to keep this up. I didn't wait to feel motivated to start, I just decided to make some changes in my life and my weight was the first thing I opted to tackle first. I haven't been obsessing over my dick for a while now so that's great as well. I'm not down on myself as often either. Life seems ok so far. I'm glad to see you're doing well as well YOTH. Take care?
  47. 4 points
    Victimorthecrime

    Issues with friends

    Well said jackbolin. "it's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog"
  48. 4 points
    jackbolin

    Issues with friends

    I can't really add much more than what others have said, but I can say that I've been through the exact same situation as you. Had a g/f, we had mutual friends, we broke up, she told the biggest mouth bitch of the group and then it was all over the place. Now I handled it a bit different. She didn't have any pics of my small guy, so I just denied it and offered to whip it out for anyone who wanted to see. I called their bluff, and of course they all said "no, don't do that". But I realized that these people were NOT my friends, and I cut them out of my life. I went on to get married. Now, that didn't exactly work out but it had nothing to do with my small penis. I tell you that because we all should realize that there are women out there who don't care about size. They are indeed more difficult to find, but they are out there. It's been my experience that it's best to be upfront about your size before any sexual activity occurs. That eliminates a lot of awkwardness, for you and her. I know how much situations like these suck, I know how frustrating/angry/sad/lonely, etc etc it can be. Just make up your mind that the size of your penis does not define you as a man and as a human being, because it doesn't.
  49. 4 points
    Hello everyone. I have been a long time lurker on his website and more specifically this sub topic. I have read mostly everything and I just want to say I know exactly how you all feel. I used to be a happy confident guy but one day I woke up and I haven't been the same since. For around the past year every second of my day has been taken by the same thoughts- I have a small penis and what can I do to make it bigger. I think it all started when I made the huge mistake of asking my wife then girlfriend if she had had a bigger penis before. I knew the answer before I had asked the question. I almost tried to stop myself from asking but didn't. In in the last year I got married and had a baby and still all I can think about is this. I spend all my day on websites reading the same stuff over and over again trying to believe the lie when people say size doesn't matter. I now look at myself as nothing but a fat hairy guy with a tiny penis. My wife says everything is fine but that means nothing to me now i thought I was the only man in the world who felt this way until I found this website and as horrible as it is to feel this way the fact I'm not the only guy like this makes me feel a bit better. Reading some of your stories the similarities to our stories are frightening. I know none of what I wrote probably makes sense but I just wanted to thank each and every one of you on here. The fact you take the time out your day to help out strangers really makes me smile. Thank you.
  50. 4 points
    Welcome to the community. I'm glad that feeling a sense of community here on the site has been comforting in some way to you through your struggles. Knowing that makes me smile. I'm sorry that you have been feeling insecure with yourself. I'm not sure what to say that might be helpful. We're here to listen. I hope to hear more from you in the future. Congratulations on your marriage and new baby. I hope you are able to enjoy some peaceful, loving moments with your new family. Take care.
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