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Showing content with the highest reputation since 05/17/2008 in all areas

  1. 197 points
    [possibly graphic, possibly trigger] I started cutting myself a few weeks ago. I'm a 24 yo male in my first year of med school. I've never been able to have a girlfriend or anything like that despite trying. I tried the online sites but failed again. I guess I cut to punish myself because I feel unworthy of love or romantic relationships. I have no problem making friends (although no I really don't hang out with people anymore) but I could never seem to find someone with mutual attraction. I'm in relatively good shape physically (so people say) but I still feel repulsive, maybe it's my face or something I don't know. I'm kind of worried because each time I cut it seems to get easier to do it. I know Dr. Dombeck said in his experience 100% of people who self-injure have survived significant abuse but I haven't. My psychiatrist thought I had PTSD like symptoms but no, I have nothing I can blame my inadequacy on but myself. I cut worse to punish myself when I have a fantasy that I could actually be in a relationship with a girl I actually like as though to remind myself what a piece of S I really am. Everyone says it's no big deal but my personality is changing as I'm becoming more reserved, withdrawn, yet more prone to outbursts. I started taking Zoloft last week but the cutting hasn't stopped. I'm ashamed to tell that to anyone in real life, I don't cut for attention I do it to punish. I am not suicidal right now but I worry if I fail out of med school I will be. School is the only thing holding me up anymore but I'm not doing well academically right now which frightens me. I just don't know what to do anymore.
  2. 52 points
    Cynthia

    CBT for ED's

    Several people in my cbt group had a lot of success with using the TEA form thought counter exercise in changing the way they looked at food and eating. I can't comment on first hand experience but it changed the way I looked at things and reduced the accompanying anxiety to almost nil so I can certainly see how the process would work on ED's as well and anxiety and panic disorder which I did suffer from. It may be worth looking into. The book we started my group with called Been there, Done that? DO THIS! by Sam Obitz is real good and straight forward if you want learn more about cbt. I hope this is useful to someone:confused:
  3. 52 points
    AmericanPsycho

    Fired my Case Manager

    Quite frankly I'm tired of her BS. Earlier this year she cancelled my trip to the store the day before and I was OUT of food. All of my money was in the bank so I had no way of taking public transportation. I had to order pizza for nearly 10 days while waiting for a few dvds to sell on Craigslist. I spent $153 on Pizza-Hut. She refused to take me yesterday but knowing the shit she likes to pull I scheduled with public transportation a week in advance.
  4. 51 points
    lola

    Mental Hospital

    I've been thinking a lot lately about death and killing myself. I want to see a therapist, and I've told my mother that I want to - she's supportive, but she's really disorganized and busy, so she never really gets around to helping me figure it out. I'm in college in a different city than her. So anyway, what I want it to go to a mental hospital. I know that it might be really really difficult, and maybe even not a positive experience - the rigid schedule, the restrictions, the lock up...but I want more than anything to have a stable, controlled environment for a short time so I can sort my stuff out in a less chaotic environment. Does anyone have experience in mental hospitals? Is this a reasonable want? Can you tell me what it's like to be in one? Any advice or insight? Any input you have is welcome.
  5. 43 points
    queenofmondays

    college

    Hi everyone. I started going to college this year & I have never been more miserable in my entire life. Before college, I had problems with anxiety and depression since my sophomore year in high school. I've never been formally diagnosed, but I know what I feel, and I'm pretty sure it doesn't span the lines of "normal." Anyways, I'm almost at the end of my first semester in college. I know I should be in a lot better of a place than I am. The only person who I've really told that I've been feeling anxious/depressed/suicidal is my boyfriend, who tries to help me and support me, but it just doesn't go through with me. It's like everything he says or does hits a brick wall. I don't know why. I just feel so cold. I don't know what to do anymore. I can barely get out of bed to make it to my classes, homework is excruciating to get through, and as an added stress causer, if I don't succeed at college this semester or if I flunk out, my parents will be so disappointed in me. I don't know what they will do, which causes me even more anxiety. Finals are coming up and I don't know if I will have it in me to even show up for them, much less try my best. I just feel lost. I try to talk to people about what I'm feeling, but no one really seems to understand. Death is on my mind more and more these days, and that really scares me. I need help, but I don't know how to get it.
  6. 41 points
  7. 37 points
    Hello. I am new here. My fiancee is pretty shy when it comes to sex. He wont let me see him naked. I think its due to the size of his penis, its small (i guess cause he wont let me see it). But i love having sex with him, i can do him everyday and i am willing to do all kinds of sexual things with him too but he just isn't willing. i am pretty open sexually, more than the average person. We have been together for 10 months, I am pregnant and we are engaged so im pretty sure he knows i love him a lot and i do try to say things like how i find him attractive, dirty talk, i tell him i wish we could have sex everyday etc... He is actually really good at sex and I just wish he wasn't so shy. As soon as we have sex he lays on his stomach, gets dressed quickly, won't let me touch his penis, won't let me give him blow jobs, won't stand naked around me. I am trying to be patient but I don't know what else I can do to make him more at ease. i try not to talk about it too much but its not getting any better. I try to initiate sex but most of the time he just says later. When I first moved in we had sex everyday but he broke a rib and had to stop but since then its been like once a week which i usually initiate. It was like this before i got pregnant so i don't think it due to me being pregnant. i am a pretty attractive female and before the belly had a pretty nice body. I just would like some advice from men to see what i can do to make him more open... I dont know what to do. Sometimes i think he's shyness is due to his body image too (he has a little bit of a spare tire but nothing bad). Or maybe its his body and the size of his penis that make him shy. i like the fact that he is shy but i wish he wasn't shy around me and be comfortable enough to be more sexually open with me especially since we are going to be married. what can i do to make him more open?
  8. 31 points
    To have a normal sized penis? I'd give 20 to 30 years at least.
  9. 21 points
    Luna-

    Cuteness Overload

  10. 21 points
    Hello I always been thinking about the purpose of my life and goals/achievements in life but no matter how much i think i cant decide or know i love drawing abd writting but i just dont view being an artist or an author as my goal, i never had any interest or even a 'dream job' as a child i just dont know life without goals seems useless and boring this is why im depressed sometimes I keep hating life for no reason especially when i started watching anime i've wishing since then if the world was like anime way especially like 'naruto' and those i cant rid of this i keep feeling that my mind isn't in this world Can someone please help me or at least tell me whats this thing happening to me
  11. 18 points
    smallstar

    Coping Methods?

    ............................
  12. 17 points
    I recommend this article: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/01/27/opinion/sunday/schizophrenic-not-stupid.html?_r=0 The author, Elyn R. Saks, is a law professor at the University of Southern California and the author of the memoir “The Center Cannot Hold: My Journey Through Madness.”
  13. 13 points
    confusedboy16

    I can't cope

    I am at breaking point. I don't know what to do to calm myself. I am questioning everything now. Nothing seems the same or familiar to me anymore. I'm questioning the integrity of my actions, of others actions. Whether or not we actually do care about each other, or the only reason we do is out of self-interest. I think I have come to believe the latter, but I don't want to. That means everyone I think I care about, I only care about because it satisfies me, and I am only thinking about me. I don't want these thoughts to continue but I want to know the truth. I question everyone's motives. Even the "kindest" of people seems fake to me now. They are kind to others because they gain pleasure from their actions. Is this not selfish? I want to care about people purely for caring, but the more I think about it the more it makes sense to me that we don't care truly, we only care about what we get out of things. We love because we want to be loved. Be are nice because we want people to be nice to us. Equally, a lot of the time if people disregard us we seem to do the same. We dislike those who don't feed our egos. All this seems true to me. Not overtly, but beneath our pretensions. Everything I thought I loved, just because I love, not seems distant and false. As I said before in my previous thread I am questioning existence and purpose. Different thoughts are coming into my mind centred around philosophy (which I usually enjoy). I just want to stop living, that way my motives won't be selfish, as I won't exist. I don't want to live if I only care about what I gain from living. You can say that helping other people is selfless, but we do so because it makes us feel good - that is self-interest, however you address it. I constantly doubt myself, and my beliefs, and whether I am a hypocrite. I feel like deep down I know the human race is selfish, and I am lying to myself otherwise. To be honest, I just want to die. But then that would also be a selfish act, so it would confirm my thoughts? I don't want to think anymore. I want to be happy. Aren't we just using people for our pleasure? I only care about others because they bring me joy. This isn't real care? If we were to take away the mutual care then either side would forget about the other. Are all relationships mere symbiotic attachment? Do I only love my mother because I NEED her, not because I want to love her. I'm so confused. Absolutely everything appears foreign to me now. One minute I find release from my worries, the next I read some sort of philosophy online that brings back the anxiety. I have just been reading about philosophical pessimism, and how nothing matters. The world will end one day so what is the purpose in trying? Everything is just wasted energy. Every time we chose optimism we are only lying to ourselves. I don't want to feel like this, but I feel it is accurate and the truth. All of the energy I use on achievement is useless. I've also been questioning the morality of incest. Why do we still classify it as wrong? Everything just seems so odd and contrived to me. I don't want to live anymore.
  14. 12 points
  15. 11 points
    sdsurfin

    Lost and Confused

    post deleted
  16. 11 points
    David O

    Recommended readings

    So, here's a new list of books, guaranteed to truly expand anyone's thinking: One Nation Under Therapy: How the Helping Culture Is Eroding Self-Reliance I Am Nujood, Age 10 and Divorced Guns, Germs, and Steel Enjoy!
  17. 6 points
    Yeah, I'd like to change my user name to something else. I made this user name because it was the first thing that came to mind and it's also misspelled, lol. So, let me know and then I'll tell you what I want to change it to. Thanks
  18. 5 points
    I think it's silly you guys think its impossible to me a nice girl. They're out there an a good relationship can be had. Put yourself in the best situation to find a good one. Jesus Christ do you people have any hobbies or interests? Find someone who loves what you love. Start there. Then when it comes time be honest with her about yourself. Lay it all out there. Man the fuck up. Women on her do you agree? Man standing up for himself and letting you know what's up and how he feels. If this isn't good enough for you than you can move on. I could see someone women loving that. I know some guys who are complete scumbag losers. Guess what there's too many of them and don't think females aren't like that either. They're fucking losers. We want to be accepted in society well take it. Fuck em. You know I'd love to have a bigger penis. It would change my life. I'm sure my GF would like it more or maybe not i really don't even know anymore. But sucks. We're beat. Can't have it. Reading these posts burns me up. I hate seeing you guys so fucking miserable. I know exactly the hell you're going through. I'm just done. I'm done being depressed. I have one life and I'm going to go down fists swinging. Fuck these whores who put us down. Fuck these guys making little dick jokes. Fuck media. Fuck them all. Why do groups have discriminatory laws for forbidding to treat people a certain way and not us? You guys on here are flirting with suicide daily. It's bullshit. You want people to continue to treat us sub human than fine. Do nothing. Quit. Or get out there. Stand up for yourself. I'm not letting one word get by me without a comment. Get it through these people's thick stupid fucking heads its not ok to go around putting people down. The shit people say has been holding you guys back. Ugh I'm just so god damn aggravated. Don't hold yourself back. Good women are out there. We have no choice but to be open to new things even if it means sex toys. I get down still but I feel like I need a good smack in the face to get my shit straight.
  19. 4 points
    Small

    whining thread

    It's 2 years tomorrow that we lost our friend Resolute. RIP We miss you.
  20. 4 points
    jazz

    whining thread

    I can't believe a year has passed already. Although I only knew Resolute through the forum and private messages, what did I learn about him? That he was witty, a deep thinker and supportive. He liked football, cars, jokes, discussions and fairness. I sometimes wonder, when various topics appear on the forum now, what his comments would have been - Res was not short of an opinion. If only we could have parachuted him away from his "unbearable circumstances" (his words.) A great loss.
  21. 4 points
    YOTH

    whining thread

    I didn't know Res well, but he was always nice to me. It was hard to understand how much losing a friend and confidant hurts, but they take a piece of you with them. It's a difficult thing to accept. I like to think, wherever he is, he's happy. 💙
  22. 4 points
    Klingsor

    whining thread

    Tomorrow August 20 will be one year since Resolute committed suicide. Small and I wanted to temporarily re-open his thread and say something. I hate sounding maudlin or saccharine so I'm just going to say what's on my mind. When I first joined the forum, I hated Resolute. I quarreled with him frequently and said some very stupid and embarrassing things to him. At some point, I'm not sure exactly when, we became friends. Although Resolute would joke and jibe, I never felt threatened by him or genuinely insulted. He always knew where to draw the line without being disrespectful. I frequently would bitch to him about other members privately (Roger, for instance), but Resolute never reciprocated. About anybody. He was truly one of the most honest people I've ever known, with no pretenses. He was intelligent and quick-witted, but not deceitful. He was also kind-hearted. He loved to debate me and also loved to discuss religion, philosophy, logic, etc. We had discussions on Skype that would last 6-8 hours that I really enjoyed. There are aspects of his life that he shared with me and Small and which I won't divulge here, but he truly had a shitty existence. Nothing he complained about was hyperbole or self-pity. The last 3 months or so, he turned me to the television program Fringe. Around this time, my grandmother died. I also finished my graduate program and started a new job. I was busy, depressed, and didn't get on Skype much. He loved voice chatting with Small and me, and I still very much regret that I did not make more time to talk with him. It still makes me feel like shit. I honestly don't consider myself a very good conversationalist on a voice call, and so I could never see how he could enjoy it. Thinking about it now, Small and I were probably the only human contact he had outside of his immediate family. I wish he was still here. But I understand the motivation. Not a day goes by that I don't want to cut my own throat. Resolute had his faults as we all do, but he was completely without pretense, deception, or hypocrisy. In a world of endless, walking contradictions, he was consistency, clarity, and logic. I don't know much else to say, other than that he showed me that good-natured companionship is possible with other people, something I had begun to doubt decades ago. Quote mining annoys me, but often you run across something that someone else has expressed superlatively well: “Friendship is the hardest thing in the world to explain. It's not something you learn in school. But if you haven't learned the meaning of friendship, you really haven't learned anything.” ― Muhammad Ali
  23. 4 points
    I hope 2018 has been good to you so far.
  24. 4 points
    malign

    Adult Imaginary Friend

    Hi, MDeCa. The first thing that struck me is that you left the rape until the end of your first post. I'm sure it has had a far greater effect than that on your life. Many survivors report having split off part of themselves (not exactly deliberately) so that the rest of them did not have to bear the full experience of what happened. Also, many, in order to feel more control over bad things happening to them again, try to justify the belief that they were to blame, so that there's something they can do differently next time. Unfortunately, it's not possible to prevent all the bad things that might happen to someone. More importantly, nothing someone might do could make them deserve rape. As to attempting to decide by yourself what diagnosis you might receive, there are several things. First, you wouldn't try that for medical conditions; abdominal pain could be appendicitis or an abdominal tumor or many other things. That's what docs are for. You don't have to follow blindly what they say, but their training is worth something. Second, the DSM is based on a concept of illness that's like scattering a bunch of bins over the landscape of human experience; if you fall into a bin, then you have that disorder. I don't think we're really like that. We don't have sharp cutoffs between health and illness. Moreover, I think there are continuums (continua, for Latin scholars) for many different traits, such as anxiety, psychotic manifestations, mood problems, and so on. I think a person can tell if they're obsessing over something, for instance, without them receiving a full OCD diagnosis. Third, you don't seem to have considered PTSD as an option. Leaving Ben out of it for a while, you said that you see and hear other things that you are aware are not in the outside world. You are aware of at least one occasion where you "lost time". You've been both suicidal and a danger to others. You describe experiences that you acknowledge are psychotic episodes. You've said that you're scared. Honestly, I don't care what you call it, those sound like a stack of good reasons to seek some kind of help. Now, my thoughts about Ben. Keep in mind that this is simply a person's opinion; use it only if it helps you. I think Ben is a part of you, whether you call him a spirit or a complex or an imaginary friend. That means that you can't be forced to give him up; he represents thoughts and feelings and skills that are yours and that you will always have. His characteristics helped you survive a terrible experience; they have value. But they're actually your characteristics, split off to deal with something the rest of you couldn't, at the time. You were thirteen. You did what you had to, and so did he. He took on the pain for you. Now you're twenty-one. You have resources you didn't have then. You have people who care about you; you have more experience; you seem to have considerable awareness. Personally, I think treatment would bring you closer to Ben than ever; in fact, it might allow you to re-merge with the capabilities he has, while allowing your gentler nature to temper the rage and desire to strike first that are causing you problems, hurting people you know wouldn't hurt you (including you.) Also, I don't think that your treatment would be medication alone. You've been through a lot, and I think that it will take a lot of healing before you feel, um, some kind of, safe again. Okay, end of opinion. I just hope that you will keep in touch, talk about the pros and cons, even let us talk to Ben if you think it would help. We've talked to a fair number of abuse and rape survivors; their stories are scattered around here. Maybe those other experiences can help you. That's why we have them recorded here, so that each survivor is not forced to start all over again. Finally, welcome, and take care of yourself until next time.
  25. 4 points
    Emed, I would recommend start working out and taking fighting lessons, if your genetics allow it. Learn how to put a guy on the ground with minimum exertion to embarrass him in front of his friends, and then learn how to beat the living fuck out of him. If you have a temper, learn to channel it with proper control because it can give you an edge. Uncontrolled anger can land you in jail - 99% of these guys are toothless tigers who hide behind their big fucking mouths and high school witticism. For the ones that don't, you'll have the skills to meet them anytime, anywhere. Ignore the stupid women.
  26. 4 points
    Victimorthecrime

    Issues with friends

    Well said jackbolin. "it's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog"
  27. 4 points
    Victimorthecrime

    I look terrible

    I hope you feel better about things Tina, you sound like a nice girl. I bet if you put your mind to it you could put together a nice look. The way we appear to others comes in large part from the confidence we project.
  28. 4 points
    confused12

    CBT for C-PTSD

    ....................
  29. 4 points
    Jessie, how was your size rejected? Was it prior to sex, or after a breakup? I understand this is likely a sensitive topic for you, and I apologize if I end up evoking depressive thoughts.
  30. 4 points
    dvnJ22

    I'm 35, virgin, and small penis

    Oh ok I saw that, awesome doc.
  31. 4 points
    Hi everyone, I'm completely new to this community so if this post is in the wrong place then I'm sorry! I'm on 10mg of Citalopram for depression and anxiety, I've been on it since Monday the 10th December - I'm due to move up to 20mg on Christmas Eve. My GP wants to take things slow because I'm 17. I had really terrible side effects for the first few days, dizziness, nausea/vomiting, fainting, memory loss, aching everywhere, shaking etc. and these side effects have completely gone. However, I am still experiencing a complete loss of appetite, I can happily go days without eating. I have recently felt a complete aversion to foods, specifically 'heavy' foods like carbs/fats/protein. I can sometimes tolerate 'light' fruits like apples/melon, and I can tolerate thin liquids, but the thought of eating a plate of pasta or pizza makes me feel sick! This is completely out of character for me, as I used to LIVE on carbs and absolutely adored Italian food. I was wondering if any of you had any suggestions to increase my appetite? I'm losing lots of weight due to not eating - and I was slim to start off with! I'm starting to look emaciated, and I want to eat and gain weight, but the thought of eating food makes me feel really ill. Help! Any advice is much appreciated! I hope you're all well.
  32. 4 points
    tonyala

    Why do women compare the two...

    I've been following this post for a couple of days. I'm a woman and I've been voyeuristic about the topic. Not out of malice, but because this story has stuck with me. I'll be doing something else and I'll start thinking about you all. After reading the female blogger's comments, I thought I'd like to chime in. First of all, I want to say that I've dated a couple of guys with very small penises. The first guy I ever fell in love with had about 4 inches. Another long term boyfriend had about 3 inches. I won't blow smoke up your ass and say that I was thrilled when I saw them for the first time, but it wasn't a deal breaker with either guy. I never looked at it like they were withholding dick from me just to be an asshole. It happens. God knows if they could have had a bigger penis, they would have. I completely appreciate and respect your self-pity. And to women who would say that it's just like having small boobs, I say "Please have a seat." It's NOTHING like that. Your manhood is entertwined with your penis in this society and it's so easy to believe that little penis= little man. Women with small breasts take some crap, I agree but this just isn't in the same ball park. Now about that blogger... I'm a blogger too and I blog in the same vein as this woman. I've also blogged about small penises. The difference is, I've called out women who make nasty remarks about a guy's sex organ. And I believe that women like that are small, nasty and trashy. WHY DO YOU DATE WOMEN WHO ARE SMALL, NASTY AND TRASHY? You're right. I don't know that you'll ever meet a woman who will clap her hands in glee when she finds out that you're smaller than average. Not that it won't happen, but realistically it's not likely. But is acceptance really all that terrible? Sometimes we just have to accept things about someone that we love. Things that maybe aren't perfect. But they're not deal breakers. They're just things. OP, I can tell that you're severely depressed. You've got issues beyond your penis size (which, by the way, sounds as if it's right around normal to me). But damn, don't KILL yourself over this. It's not your fault and it's not that big of a deal. I'm too old now for most of you but back in the day I was actually quite hot. Trust me, I was. And I'd have gone out with that Brady guy in a heartbeat because he's funny and smart and sincere. THAT is what's important. How much time do you actually spend having sex in a relationship anyway? This is already super long but I'm going to wrap it up by saying that both of my boyfriends who were smaller than average were really gifted in other areas. Compensate. Learn to accept. Being angry at your penis isn't going to fix anything. And neither is suicide.
  33. 4 points
    I know I've been depressed for years now... still I never consulted anyone about it but that's not the point here. I'm aware I have trouble concentrating on some things but I always thought it was because I was depressed. I'm not teaching anyone anything here but when you're depressed, well, you tend not to give a flying sh*t about anything and especially about the things you know you don't care about. That's why I never cared too much regarding why I could never finish one single page of a book or started daydreaming during a boring conversation. But now, I fear that I might suffer from ADHD (without too much hyperactivity). When I watch, say, a show I usually pause it after 5min and take a walk around the house. Then I might feel like listening to a song, so I do that. After that I watch five more minutes but stop again and browse the Internet. I just started a new job and when my boss explains me something, my mind just starts wandering everywhere even though I concentrate really hard keeping on with what's going on. I daydream all the time. Could I be suffering from ADHD or am I just bored and undisciplined?
  34. 4 points
    Guest

    well, malign

    I have the impression that I lack both the technical ability to write you a PM and an idea what concerns you think I'd tell you about. Sure, I do you the favor of creating another fake email adress. And I just want to say that you're either stupid to think I blame you for your absence and what happened or you think it's wise to put me in a position of saying something forgiving. I don't think you're stupid and I don't think I'm stupid either. I won't keep changing. I merely needed to add something and I did. I don't expect anyone to understand why it was important since that would indeed require a miracle. So there's no need to try and integrate my views into the "community". What I come back for now is you, malign. I'm sorry you won't be able to fix this, but thank you for trying. Much as I like your wisdom, you can't possibly change or make up for all the crap I see. Even I can't. And I'm quite brilliant. I've just had enough. Please take care. S. (Can hardly wait to read comments on how "the crap I see" really is a mental problem of mine. Do you know what this reaction is called? I do.) http://www.moillusions.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/12/trippy_coffee_beans_comic.jpg
  35. 3 points
    IrmaJean

    Mental abuse and Human Rights violations

    Raisul, do you think it's possible the nightmares you have been experiencing could be a response to your daytime distress? You mentioned being bullied in the past. That kind of experience, especially if it was ongoing, can stay with a person and affect their mental health. It also sounds like you have been having difficulty getting restorative sleep. Sleep deprivation can wreak havoc on both physical and mental health. Have you considered seeing a medical doctor about your sleep difficulties? I also agree that seeing a psychologist might be helpful.
  36. 3 points
    Small

    ----

    A friend can make all the difference in the world.
  37. 3 points
    It was an ok Christmas 🎄 believe or not. I ate well, got a great nap, watched the tube, ran some errands, did some cleaning, talked to a friend on the phone. Now I am chilling watching football and drinking decaffeinated coffee ☕️ but feeling anxious so I took 2 St John wart capsules. Trying to remind myself it is 4 day work week leading into a 3 day weekend but it's not cheering me up.
  38. 3 points
    YOTH

    SPS Celebrity List (Motivation)

    @RonaldU "But you are doing something you don't like others doing to you." I'm lost here, what did I do exactly? In a positive tone and good mood of course. I'm just adding one of the greatest footballers who ever lived to the list. And yes, I'm doing what others have done me, that's the point. I thought we were compiling a small penis list for the government so we can be tagged and tracked 24/7
  39. 3 points
    lookingforafriend

    Just here for anyone for SDS.

    Are you lonely because you have/think you have a small penis? Do you live in the UK? A group of us on this site from all over the UK are like minded and are here to be supportive - please read on....
  40. 3 points
    Someday

    Not sure what I'm looking for

    by signing up here. Maybe I just need to vent. Like a lot of guys here I don't mind too much about my erect size (5 inches). But my flaccid size (1 inch) is what has bothered me my entire life. I don't even like looking at myself in the mirror. For a tall guy at 6'5 though, 5 inches just doesn't look right. I'm not a virgin but have limited experience with women going into my late 30's. Women always expect tall guys to be hung and that's part of my hesitation to get back out there. I can remember in high school we'd have the option to take communal showers after gym or after practice. I did it one time and never again. I would always skip the shower and just be the smelly guy for the rest of the day. Even when I had to get a physical to get cleared to play sports by the doctor, I remember her smirking a little bit. Growing up, I always had the mentality that I had a micropenis. Eventually I found out that because of my erect size I don't fall into the mirco category. But nobody really sees your erect size, they always see your flaccid. Not to toot my own horn but I consider myself (and have been told numerously) that I'm a good looking guy. College educated. On the outside, I seem to have it all going for me. But nothing could be further from the truth. Growing up I knew when girls were flirting with me. I knew when they were showing interest. Maybe I'd take them out once or twice, but I never pushed it further. Some of my friends have even called me out on being gay. Which isn't a bad thing, btw. People constantly ask me how I'm still single, or what's wrong with me. I usually respond jokingly like "you don't even know." Most of the time I'm pretty good at keeping myself busy to keep my mind off of things. I work a lot and on top of that I like to workout a lot and and hang out with my single friends. So usually it's not on my mind. But every now and then the loneliness does creep up on me. Usually it's when I see a couple out together having a good time. Sometimes I even despise the guys that I see out with beautiful women. Even though they've never done me any wrong. My confidence has never been high. Usually when my friends go out to the bars/clubbing to go troll for girls, they ask me to come along. I usually come up with some lame excuse involving work the next day even though I'm off that day. I feel like if I had a normal penis my confidence would be through the roof. Reading through the topics it's nice to see I'm not the only one with this problem. Anyways, thanks for listening.
  41. 3 points
    The Guest House This being human is a guest house.Every morning a new arrival.A joy, a depression, a meanness,some momentary awareness comesAs an unexpected visitor.Welcome and entertain them all!Even if they're a crowd of sorrows,who violently sweep your houseempty of its furniture,still treat each guest honorably.He may be clearing you outfor some new delight.The dark thought, the shame, the malice,meet them at the door laughing,and invite them in.Be grateful for whoever comes,because each has been sentas a guide from beyond. - Rumi
  42. 3 points
    Luna-

    I'm still standing (better than I ever did)

    Helllooooo. Just a brief visit (I think, at least that's the plan for now). How is everyone??? I am well, truly well. For about 3 years now. No episodes, no symptoms! Faithfully taking my meds - no ways am I going to risk destroying my stability and good life. Swallowing a few pills 3 times a day is easy-peasy when it means I can have my life in return. I packed up and sold my house, car and most worldly possessions and moved my life in South Africa back to my home country, Denmark. I've been away 43 years. I absolutely love it here. Plus I brought my cat with me and she now miaows in Danish. Let me hear your news? Luna
  43. 3 points
    Resolute

    whining thread

    i finally had a proper meal today (they've been few and far between). was invited to a relative's. i also walked there, so got a bit of exercise, lol. it was actually nice. even though i had to be insincere, it was still nice. i hadn't seen anyone in a while, so this was a good opportunity to catch up. we're also invited to another relative's tomorrow, which is even a longer walk, lol.
  44. 3 points
    you leave the house??? jeez, no need to boast mate!
  45. 3 points
    I agree with this completely. Men are always portrayed as sex-obsessed, to the point where it's not necessarily true. I don't think that a "real man" exists in reality. I think the concept of a "real man" is just a social construct. It's an inherently vague concept, one that lays out of reach for virtually all men, since no one can truly ever attain its status. Men should not be worshipping women. They're not worthy of being worshipped. I didn't mean that to sound misogynistic, but it's true. Women are just human beings and thus members of an animal species just like men are. I don't want to cause any to be offended by what I am about to say, but I mostly have contempt for men who feel that they have to serve their girlfriends or just women in general because they want to please them or something. I don't hate women at all, I just think that wanting to please them is unnecessary, just like wanting to please men is unnecessary. Men are not female sexual organ worshippers, that's ludicrous.
  46. 3 points
    i know. but all alliances are temporary and based on convenience. moreover, freud asserts that the only reason why people collude is to hurt their common enemy with more force.
  47. 3 points
    Jeep

    New Person

    .
  48. 3 points
    Hi everyone This is my first post and I hope a step in the right direction to understanding what's going on. I will give you the basics I'm 32, work an average job in the city and live with my partner who I have known for about 5 years. Every morning for the past 20 years I have woken up in a state of anxiety, not always about the same thing, but the general worry is failure and money, which as you can imagine has made me an excellent saver with little actual money worries. I feel my days involve avoiding situations and people that may push me over the edge. It only takes a small event to push me to far. When this happens I won't sleep, eat, socialise or make any attempt to live the life I know I deserve. This happened to me about once every three months, last time my partner lost his job. The past 5 years I have become more aware of the control anxiety has over me. I have been on some amazing holidays and gone through some happy life events but have never enjoyed them or the moment as I am always worrying about small detail and the risk. I try very hard to hide the way I feel from my family as I do not feel they would ever fully understand and let's be honest I am ashamed I feel this way. This has resulted in me being a bit of the black sheep in the family. Little comments that are dropped by them are hard to swallow. A recent smack in the face was when a close friend said out loud " you never know when she is happy because she never smiles and lets her hair down!", of course I laughed this off (again) I have visited a number of drs and they have prescribed me medication for anxiety but it just made me very dizzy and jumpy, not great when I work long hours and need to be alert. I am hoping some of what I am writing is ringing bells with someone reading this...... My concerns are for my future. I try not to look forward too much but my partner is now asking me about having children. The thought of it petrifies me, but even worse would be trying to bring up a child dealing with this anxiety. I am looking firstly for someone to reassure me that I am not alone in feeling this way, I feel I am going to break badly at some point in the near future, 20 years is a long time and I see it as 20 years lost. Has any one got any advice on dealing with this case of anxiety? I have had a number of therapy sessions about 8 years ago, I also had a number of group therapy sessions but I felt the other people in the room had little experience of the kind of anxiety I suffer with. Well I am going to click post and see what happens, if anyone can relate to this post then please reply.....
  49. 3 points
    mysmallone4

    Just One man's experience

    I am a 74 year old man with a 4" by 4.75" erect penis. I just found and joined this community. I wish it had been availaable 50 years ago when I really needed it. I thought perhaps sharing some of my experience might be helpful to someone who is struggling with this issue. I don't pretend to have an answer that will make everyone happy with what they have nor am I going to tell you there still aren't times when I would trade mine in on a larger model. I will tell you I am happy with my "little guy", he brings me tremendous amounts of pleasure. Even at my age, he stands proud several times a week. I have over the years met, talked with and had relations with many women who liked small ones. Through this wonderful internet, where I have posted pictures of him, I have had contact with women of all ages throughout the country. I started a chat room "small penis husband"s" and received responses from both husbands and wives. I figure that some men like women with large breasts and some men like women with small breasts. Some women like men with a large penis, some women like men with a small penis. It is just a matter of finding the right match. Just think how much fun the reasearch is. Actually, my experience has been that many women are not that concerned (or at least kind enough not to say) about penis size. It is we men who get so focused on size. I admit to being bi and I have many men contact me who either have small ones or like small ones. I was not always in this posture. Highschool was hell. I wouldn't go out for sports because of changing in the locker room. It wasn't until I was in college and desperate for sexual experiences, that I started reading every book I could find on love making techniques. I believe if I had a large one I never would have bothered. I was fortunate to meet a couple of girls who were really into sex and experimenting. They taught me a great deal about how to please a woman. I knew then as I know now, I work so hard at it as an offset to my small size. Today I am confident I can please most women in bed. And thanks to the internet I can exchange pictures with people all over the world. I can walk around a nudist park without a bit of shame, because I know there are as many eyes enjoying "my small One" as there are people thinking how small I am. I don't know where I am going with this, so I think I will stop. I look forward to discussing the various topics and to chatting with some of you in the days ahead. Frank
  50. 3 points
    Hey I was wondering if watching porn can lead to being a pedophile. I have really bad anxiety worrying that I am a pedophile. Even though I don't look at or masturbate to CP, and I have anxiety attacks for hours if I get a fleeting thought about a kid and I stay away from kids and being near them worries me. I am worried about that and haven't watched porn for months cause I am worried it will lead me to being a pedophile. What do you all think...
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