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xenophon

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xenophon last won the day on December 2 2009

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About xenophon

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  • Birthday 12/25/1944
  1. I have not been here in a good while. I have been living, acting and feeling 'normal' ( yea, normal is a setting on a dryer), so I have had no reason to come. And, very little to say if I did come. All is well at my end. I hope folks here are coping with the - inescapable - insults of life.
  2. yes, the cravings always pass. And eventually, the cravings will lose strength and come less often. Finally, the cravings will stop entirely. There is a natural healing process; you will new different and more life affirming thoughts, feelings and activities.
  3. I lost my father and my first wife with in a year. I do not know, specifically, what anyone could have said or done.
  4. Congratulations, symora
  5. Insofar as the loss of loved ones are concerned - and I have lost most of mine - it is "normal" to feel terrible. There would be, I think, something unusual going on if you did not feel terrible. The idea that someone may be simply go on as if nothing serious happened is quite unrealistic. I felt terrible. Nowadays, I don't feel terrible. And, that is OK as well.
  6. Yes it is. I am quite glad matters are working out. feeling bad is not fun.
  7. I am doing fine. I am reading, doing some gardening, doing genealogy, enjoying my family, etc. I have no health, physical or mental, issues. I have no money worries. The church that I go to is fine, well within my comfort zone. No complaints. After the emotional turbulence of a few years ago, life has leveled out.
  8. Yes, it is interesting. It does seem to me that people do inherit tendencies of personality. Just my impression, though.
  9. I am thinking about the 'nature/nurture' idea. I think that we inherit personality predispositions. That is the 'nature' side of it. 'Nurture' is our interaction with life, and how it effects our personality/beliefs/attitudes/behavior. I have no idea of the ratio of 'nature/nurture'. All that may be a bit serious for this thread.
  10. I scored INTJ. The introversion was strong. But the others were much less so. Iam on the 'cusp' of the other three.
  11. I did have experience with SMART Recovery. I did not go to live meetings, so I can't say anything about those. I found the rest useful: the tools helped me to relearn logical thinking, manage turbulent emotions; the message board had nice people who were helpful and supportive. The live meetings at the chat room were good, even though they were chatty. The message board was a good outlet and the tools helped. SMART did the task that I assigned it to do.
  12. Christian and jewish religion have a lot of beliefs/doctines that people have to -usually - exhibit an acceptance. Christian denominations have argued and fought over [ literally] these ideas from the start. One often wonders why they were worth a fight. But, but people decided that they were worth a fight. These ideas can get very complicated. If you want to belong to a certain denomination, you learn just learn to let a lot of it go. Spirituality, generally, is not like that. It is, usually, very difficult to put into words; basically, it is a set of feelings.
  13. It has to do, I think, with considering others first and self second. One may call it politeness or good manners. I think that it is more than that. Although good manners are important in that manners provide a method for dealing in a civil manner with others. Good manners are grounded in the dignity and essential equality of humans. One can, of course, frame it so that God comes in.
  14. Through relationship is true. I know that I am much better off through relationships. I agree with symora -- where we learn and perfect our virtues.
  15. Well, first of all, there really are no 'giants'. There may be some who think that they may be giants. Self respect and self confidence are quite important though. Having both does not indicate that you think that you are a giant. Wanting to have a drink and a smoke and actually having one are quite distinct. catsirish, you are not unusual iin that regard. Finding the meaning of life is not always easy. We all find our own path to that. In the USA, most people just go with the standard versaion of Christianity. It is OK to go down a different path.
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