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m.allen

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m.allen last won the day on June 4 2016

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About m.allen

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  1. i just need help

    How are you doing? Are you still feeling this way? Like Irma said, these feelings can pass. It's very likely in the future that you'll look back on that moment and be glad you didn't end your life. Things can get so so much better for you. I guarantee not everyone thinks you're annoying. Your parents would be devastated and inevitably blame themselves, and you have a friend who cares for you too. You're not as easily replaceable as you might think, the pain of your death is something they would carry with them for a long time, possibly forever. But more than that, you will be selling yourself short on a full life and a chance at happiness. Trust me in that your perspective changes a lot as you get older. I would have resented that kind of statement when I was younger, but it's true. You will see that things you worried about now weren't the great things you made them out to be (I hope that doesn't sound like I'm belittling your problems, I just mean to say that perspectives change; especially from adolescence to adulthood) and things can get drastically better for you as you get older. School can be rough and young folks can be cruel. Fortunately, most people grow out of this and I think you could have a chance at a truly great life. As far as we know, it's the only life you've got and things can almost always get better and be worth living for. Depression can warp everything into a pit of pointless despair though and if it's this that you're suffering from then I highly recommend seeking professional help in the form of a therapist or something. It's surprising what even just talk therapy and cbt can do for people, and (while I know people groan when I bring this up) eating well and exercising genuinely changes your mood and views on things. If you can get a gym membership (or do fitness blenders for free on youtube) and start doing that, it's surprising how good you will start to feel after you begin doing it every day. It's like stepping into the mind of a different person. It just takes that initial push to get yourself to do it. I find counting down from 5 in my head and moving on 1 works well. 5 4 3 2 1--> and I'm up and going to the gym. Anyway, hope this helps you or someone else reading this. All the best.
  2. whining thread

    He is planning on ending his life this Sunday, I hope he won't be upset that I am telling others this, but I'm really worried he's making a huge mistake here. I'd appreciate it if you guys could all send him your support too by whatever means you can.
  3. whining thread

    Hey Res are you around still? Tried skyping you from a new account but didn't go through and it won't let me send you private messages on my iPad... I hope you aren't following through on your plans to end your life.
  4. My Micro Penis

    Sorry to hear that, life certainly isn't fair. Accepting it is definitely the way to go. As far as we know this is your one chance to live and, ultimately, you can choose to live your entire life feeling sorry for yourself & feeling anxious about it or accepting it & living life to it's fullest potential. Your issue is a tough one, but no one is perfect and I guarantee any girl you're with is self conscious about something as well. For me I started losing my hair when I was 20, which really ruined some years for me when I could have otherwise accepted it and enjoyed what I did have: health, clean conscience(at the time), good family & friends, etc. I can't get those years back I spent stressed out about my hair loss and I ended up going bald anyway, so what did I get from worrying about it? Nothing. Just wasted time when I could have gotten over it and enjoyed myself best I could. Not saying your issue is just like mine, but I hope you can extrapolate that into your own situation. I'm not sure about others, but I also feel that self consciousness goes away more and more as you get older, I imagine things will only get easier for you as time goes on and you become more and more comfortable in your skin. You sound like a good guy and that's all that matters in the end. All the best man and hope you can feel good about yourself.
  5. Old panics

    If you truly love your dad, as it's obvious you do, you should respect what he would want, and that is obviously for you to stop harming yourself and considering suicide. Death is an unavoidable part of life for everyone, the only thing to do is treat the time you have as precious. So, spend time with him, worrying will get you no where, and thinking of suicide isn't what he would want.
  6. Wish I could die

    Maybe a beneficial thought experiment could be to imagine how the 'you' would act if you liked yourself? How would this 'likeable you' behave and think? What is the first thing they would do? The second? And so on. And then one step at a time, allow yourself to slowly become this likeable version of yourself. This version of you that you like and are proud of. Maybe it could help to stop before you do something and think if it's something the you that you like would do, or if it's something the you that you hate would do, and then choose to act in ways that make you proud of yourself and begin to like yourself. Creating small goals at first is probably best and then build on that momentum. If you were watching a movie about your life, how would you want the protagonist or 'hero' in the movie to act? What would you want them to do? What would you think is the healthiest, best & right thing for them to do? And then do those things. One step at a time, do those things, and when you fail to do those things try to use that as motivation to succeed next time. People can help you through this and we are here for you, but this is something that you're going to have to change within yourself. Best of luck. I'm sorry times have been hard.
  7. Beast

    Well I'm sorry to hear that you and your friends seem like you're drifting apart right now. I think the best thing to do in this situation is just to be open with your friend about how you feel and also try to understand where you friend is coming from. Listen to them to understand why they are acting this way without getting angry at them and calling them names. I can see how pain can be a simple escape from your feelings, I do the same thing with movies or video games sometimes when I'm stressed out to take me away from what's happening. Ultimately the more you run from something (in this case your feelings) the stronger this thing you're running from will become and the more power it will have over you. I think what you need to do is be brave and face your bad feelings next time they come without running from them. Just sit down and let yourself feel bad for a little while, I promise you that it will suck, but the feelings will slowly fade. And the next time these feelings come in, it will suck again, but a little bit less than before. But the more you try to run from your feelings, the more you're going to have to keep running and those feelings will just become even more intense. You should want the best thing for yourself. And that is to do the healthiest thing, which is difficult as there's no easy way out, but is best for you in the long term. Which is to talk openly to your friends about how you feel, try to empathize with how they might be feeling and allow yourself to feel sad without trying to escape it through harming yourself. If you do these things then these feelings you are experiencing won't have so much power over you as you are facing them down. That's my advice, I wish you all the best. It might help you to read some problems other people are going through on this website to gain some perspective on your problems too.
  8. Beast

    What happened? It sounds like you went through a tough breakup. Beauty is an impermanent thing and not something to worry about, but you shouldn't harm yourself as a way to prove to yourself that you don't care about it. In the end you're still caring about beauty by trying to be ugly, you need to just stop worrying about it altogether. Harming yourself is only going to make things worse, true happiness is built off being able to love & accept who you are. If this is a breakup, I've been through a terrible one myself a long time ago. One day you will look back on it and be able to find some lesson in it and/or be able to enjoy the good that you experienced as well as the bad and/or be able to move on from it. It's ok to feel bad in this moment, but please don't do anything drastic like self-harm. I recommend you call or stay with a friend or family member who you can trust in the meantime. I guarantee that some point in the future you will care about your life again. I know it hurts right now, but be strong and let yourself feel this hurt in a healthy way (again, without harming yourself or others) so you can move on from it later. One day you will be able to put it behind you, but for now it is going to hurt. I'm sorry you're going through this, life sucks sometimes (trust me I know). In the meantime please don't go through it alone. Reach out to someone and talk about this. All the best.
  9. I'm so tired

    sorry to hear of your troubles Stressmonkey, i can imagine it all feels so overwhelming right now. it's healthy to feel sad and stressed sometimes, but try to find balance too if you can. don't overlook the good things in your life, like that you're on your way to a great career in nursing, have a healthy daughter, etc. i've been on the receiving end of a similar relationship in the past, i know how much it hurts to be stabbed in the back like that. ultimately, it's better to find out sooner than later though as this isn't the kind of person you want to be with long term. i'm sure this issue with your daughter will pass, the work load during your program will eventually ease up and you'll meet someone new when you're ready. there's a lot to look forward to. i can see how you'd feel swamped in the meantime, but i guess just try to enjoy the journey by taking it moment to moment when you can. hope you're well.
  10. good day to die

    no one will laugh at you here, especially me. i have loads of issues and struggle every day. if you need someone to relate to i'm always here and you can always pm me too.
  11. I can't stop eating

    sorry to hear about this Lala. i know i can't fully understand what it's like to be going through this for you, but be strong. you possess the willpower to say no to anything. it seems to me like when people let themselves do something they don't want to do or believe isn't right that they lose a bit of respect for themselves, and that it becomes easier to falter the next time because of that. respect yourself and your health. it won't be easy to say no to cravings or to binge eating, especially if it's a response to deal with some there problem you might be having, but know that you can. you have the willpower to do it and i know you can say no. to make things easier i would suggest eating before you go grocery shopping and only buying healthy foods. snack often in the say on things like bananas, apples, raw nuts, greek yogurt, carrots, peas, etc. so that when you do make your meals you aren't diving into whatever is easy or what you crave. try to plan ahead a bit and have healthy snacks in between meals. i guarantee you will physically feel better if you eat better as well as emotionally too. it takes a lot of willpower for sure, but i know that you can succeed in this. and if you mess up once in a while it's ok, just make sure you jump right back on healthy eating. and on that note, i would recommend exercising too if you don't already. it can literally make your life better and longer, and once you get into it, it becomes something you can actually look forward to.
  12. I really want to die

    So, a part of you wants to do something that has great potential to be very harmful to someone, but you haven't done it. There is obviously a part of you that doesn't want to do this too. If you can promise yourself that you're not going to do it can you then let yourself out of the house? Let yourself live? If you have the urge to do something terrible and you don't do it, that doesn't make you a terrible person. What makes you terrible is actually doing it. I don't think the general public wants you to be locked away in your house at all. Imo I think they would want you to recognize that you should never harm anyone or take advantage of anyone, but that as long as you never do it, then you should forgive yourself for not being perfect and get out there and live. There's probably a lot of ways you could put good into the world if you let yourself do so. Coming form someone with OCD and anxiety, that's what I think this is mostly. I have been aroused by young girls at times, even masterbated over it a few times, but I recognized it wasn't a healthy behaviour and had great potential for a lot of harm if I ever actually did it, so I moved on from it and only seek healthy relationships now. Maybe you can never move on from it, but you don't have to act on it if you don't want to. It sounds to me like you truly don't want to if you're willing to shut yourself up in your house over it. So, trust yourself that you're not going to do it and as long as you never actually do it then you should get out there and LIVE. All the best.
  13. Variables

    difficult to think* your way out of.... auto correct... blah
  14. Variables

    woah. you seem so intelligent and introspective for a 14 year old. I hope you're making some ground on your issues. From my perspective, I feel like I want to shake you out of it -but if only it were that simple. you're on the right track seeking help for sure. im trule sorry this is afflicting you. I think you're caught in a deceptive thought pattern and obviously that is something that's difficult tontine your way put if without outside support. it's probably hypocritical for me to give you advice, or anyone for that matter? but here goes: you're going to die one day. sounds like terrible advice but hear me out. once you can truly comprehend that, at least for me, it puts a lot of the bs in perspective. NOTHING will ever be perfect. this is life. but wasting your days not being the person you want to be is silly. it's not easy to change, but in the face of this truth how can you not do anything but be the person you genuinely want to be? I can tell just from your post that you have a lot of potential. I hope you can find the strength to be who you truly want to be. and take a lesson from me; make sure you're a good person along the way. hope you're well B. B.
  15. i dont know but im alone

    things can get better, don't deprive yourself of that opportunity. i'm sorry it's this way right now, you're not worthless.
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