Look, I dont know where else to ask about this. I do not have an eating disorder, but all that comes up when I ask daddy google is about OCD and EDs, and I've never been concerned about my weight. I'm fat, I dont care. I used to like eating but now I'm just turned off by literally everything under the sun, not even just food. The dog is kinda wet - I wanna throw up. The butter smells buttery - I wanna throw up. This eggroll had been in my mouth for .002 seconds too long - I wanna throw up. I've struggled to keep down meals for days now.
I've become pretty agitated and upset that I wasted some buffalo chicken bites from a restaurant because I chewed one for two long and couldnt bear eating the rest. That probably makes it sound like i sit there chewing for five minutes, but it's a pretty typical amount of time: my brain just doesnt think so, I guess.
Other searches said depression, and I guess, but I've been feeling pretty okay for months. I'm not even on my medication anymore and I'm fairly unlikely to accept I'm still clinical. In other words, everything was fine and now I would rather starve than eat.
Yes, I have an appetite. I'm actively hungry. The thought of eating makes me nauseated.
I can forcibly swallow some things, but nothing tastes good it's only just tolerable. Tolerable or vile. Theres no in between or balance.
Sorry if I'm coming off as majorly aggressive, but the eggroll thing happened not long ago and it really pissed me off because i took time from my day to make it and my body is being a jerk about it.
I have a doctor's appointment in a week, but I have about as much faith in them as I do google right now. Is there literally anyone else who is like, "o ye, that happened to me, I feel, dont worry youre fine, something about age and DNA or something"?