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Toosmallforcomfort

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Toosmallforcomfort last won the day on January 14

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  1. Couple things.... While I enjoyed a Creighton basketball game and hearty steak dinner in Omaha, this location is not the geographic center of the US. This spot resides in Kansas. #2 If you have had great sex in the past, that tells me you can do it again. Unless your wife has sought other suitors who have given her a different experience in the interim. If not, and you have performance anxiety, I would recommend PDE-5 inhibitors, i.e. viagra, cialis, etc. You get erect more frequently and for longer and might be worth the money. Easy way to be 18 again per your penis. If your back goes out, don't blame me. IMHO, it seems that a physical response can override any psychological hindrance you may have given your admission that you have had a positive sexual experience with your wife in the past.
  2. There will be many, many books, documentaries, articles written about COVID, including the huge baby boom that will be upon the World starting in several months.
  3. Well what I would say that guys like us have to "trick" the opposite sex that we are confident enough to deserve their attention, despite our specific physical shortcomings.
  4. Uptight got in touch with me recently about what I thought about the pandemic. I just wanted to come clean why I have been absent. I was a frequent flyer in here for a time, as you know, because I was in distress. I learned from your comments, suggestions and opinions about a topic (SPS) I never really contemplated about in any real fervor. I reached a point where there was longer a need for me to talk/be involved in these discussions. There was no personal issue with any one of you, but rather I moved on from my despair of my short penile stature. So, I thank you. I wish you all well and stay healthy during this troubling time.
  5. Obviously, a question for SPS sufferers. If your wife or significant other tells you that they want an open marriage/relationship after 10 years of being together, would you: a. Yes, of course. Anything you want to make you happy. b. Yes, with reservations. c. No, we should work on our relationship. d. Hell no. Hit the highway.
  6. Okay so she is a hypocrite. I thought liberals were all about acceptance of everyone and everything and sexual orientation and no matter what you look like and what you feel. But time and time again it shows me that certain hypocrite liberals will only support or disparage things that are good for them, personally. These songs are all about going in the gray zone of social acceptance , creating controversy and giving her more attention then what is typically deemed necessary in the music Realm. This isn't uncommon, this is been done before numerous times in the music industry and continues to this day. Push the envelope and stir the Beast. She happened to stumble upon something that we in this forum find unnerving, unacceptable and quite honestly hurtful. You don't have to tell me I'm fat, I'm fat. You don't have to tell me I'm small, I'm small. You don't have to tell me I'm short, I'm short. Although I know it's human nature to bully and feel Superior at the expense of other weaker individuals, but it does not mean that we have to do it. We are greater than Apes. If I wrote a song and plastered it on YouTube about large, loose vaginas, I would lose my job, my family, and God knows how many other things. But it's free speech and no matter how hurtful it is, there's not much we can do about it except complain about it and not listen.
  7. I was asked earlier from someone in this forum what would I do next. Find someone else? My initial reaction was I need some time. But honestly, I've been in a celibate marriage, not her, the day my wife told me she no longer wanted to have sex with me close to 4 years they day after we sought couples counseling for the last time. Sex was always an anxiety producing experience ever since I could remember. Knowing where I stood in the bell curve yielded my lack of bedroom confidence. So these last four years or so, I have not had that specific anxiety and I've been OK with that. Imagine knowing that you have to have sex with your wife to just keep her happy enough to stay in the marriage. And then doing such a poor job at it, she no longer wants to have it with you. Actually, I'm surprised I was married for as long as I was. So now if you ask me, I think I'm ok being asexual. Am I 100% ok with that? No. But, celibacy for me avoids anxiety that would happen again if I chose to date unless something in my mindset makes a dramatic change at age 46. There lies my conundrum.
  8. I speak bad about my ex to my Mother and in this forum. That's it. Never to my kids. Oh yea, in therapy sessions.
  9. https://www.sandiegouniontribune.com/news/health/sdut-penis-length-study-2015mar02-story.html So, I haven't posted in awhile because I needed a break from this forum to reset my thoughts. Many of you know I like concrete stats, things that are black and white, and logical. When it comes to SPS, much of it is not logic and more about emotion and self inflicted ideals stemming from a lack of sexual confidence based on real or perceived small penis size due to societal expectations or personal experiences. I found this comprehensive study, although I'm sure many of you have found the same information, about average penis size. It is a metanalysis of several studies with a huge sample size of 15,000 men. That means the results should be pretty reliable and one can extrapolate these results to the rest of the male population. Unless, many of the measuring studies where flawed in some way or another, i.e., poor ethnic sample distribution, self and not direct measurement, etc. I just wanted to point some things out to everyone, if not for myself. Of the 15,000 men, the average erect size is 5.17 inches. One standard deviation is 0.65 inches. Therefore 68% of all men fall between 4.52 and 5.82 inches. 16% of all men are greater or equal to5.82 inches and 16% are less than or equal to 4.52 inches. So how many of us suffer from SPS? 50%? I don't think so. Or, maybe we do and not all of us below the average exhibit the same severity of symptoms that hinder our potential achievements in sexual, personal, or life experiences. This is where it gets fuzzy for me; it's not all black and white. There is something quite complex about how we all handle this short coming differently. Now, when it comes to women and their preferred penis size, the most quoted research study by far (https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4558040/) showed that women preferred a penis of slightly larger circumference and length for one-time sexual partner (length = 6.4 inches/16.3 cm, circumference = 5.0 inches/12.7 cm) versus long-term sexual (length = 6.3 inches/16.0 cm, circumference = 4.8 inches/12.2 cm) sexual partners. Therefore, if we average this to 6.35 inches, this places the ideal sized man to be about only 14%(estimate as I don't have the stats of the study, but obviously less than 16%) of the population. This tells me there are a lot of sexually unhappy heterosexual women out there based on their said preference. And, if they are sexually experienced, as this is a numbers game, the more chance she would have found that 6.35 inch guy and would have eventually settled for someone smaller. Again, law of averages dictates that fact. Now, I understand the penis alone is not everything to the heterosexual experience for women, but physiologically, it has to be a very important component. So what's my point.... SPS should be an epidemic, but it doesn't seem to be that way, or maybe it actually is and is just silent, festering in most men's minds and never discussed or realized. As my soon-to-be-ex-wife says, you should fake it till you make it. Well, I didn't fake it and it cost me my marriage. Although, I suffer from a lack of sexual confidence because of my size (less than the mean, but within one standard deviation), I find it illogical that I continue to struggle to find my way out of this funk given the sheer number of men that are sexually confident, married and in long term relationships. Logically, however, I am still human.
  10. Actual still play one at work. I like what I do and I'm good at it. I have confidence in what I do and how I handle coworkers, put out fires, grow a business. IMO, this has much to do with my brain and my upbringing, rather than my penis size. The problem with me is when I went home and dealt with my significant other. I changed.
  11. In case you were wondering, my current mindset on relationships is nonexistent. I have zero intimate confidence at the moment. I'm focusing on my children and my job which are everything to me right now. She tells me she forgives me and wants to be friends, all knowing that she will get a multi-seven figure payout in a few months and monthly alimony, including half time child support, in the top 1% of income earners tax free. BTW, she does not work. I'm in no mood to have that kind of relationship with her, but only as the mother of my children.
  12. Both of you are generally correct from your interpretation from my posts. Johnson, my decision after knowing of her second affair, whose penis size I did not know, was to allow, per her request, to leave at most nights and come back the next day to keep the family unit intact. Kids were 10 and 7 at the time. He was married with similar children ages with a wife and children in a different state. I became exceeding jealous when she went for a weekend to meet his parents out of state. I begged, pleaded, bought her loads of expensive shit that I'm too embarrassed to divulge here and convinced her to stay. She stayed and agreed to counseling, etc. We went once to a therapist, she didn't like him, and did not want go to therapy again. Within a year, she told me she did want to have sex with me any more. I became depressed, started to drink, and withdrew from her. Then she had an affair without me knowing about it for 1.5 years and he broke it off. Then 3 months ago, my 14 year old daughter and I got kicked out of the house, and within a week, she was traveling 1.5 hours away to see her bf. She calls me a "little man in so many ways", "and that she thinks she was my beard". No doubt that a certain type/quality of sex is what she desired and I was not able to perform. Now, I'm not proud of all this. But you are right, divorce, no matter what, was the only option for me and I filed on my birthday. She told me multiple times she would never file for divorce. BTW she first asked for a divorce nearly 14 years ago at her brother's wedding. Now to uptight's comment... I agree with everything you said, but for one. I had my doubts from the beginning given her self expressed " bf experience", but I didn't feel it was a mistake at the time. I thought that I could overcome my sexually inadequacy issues with someone that seemed to support confidence in me. No doubt I was marrying up in the looks department. Think of a George Costanza type and a shorter Lucy Liu. Plus, I was riding high in self, nonsexual confidence at the moment from other things that were going on, i.e., med school, fellowship, job, etc. I thought I found someone that could "fix" me. Didn't work out that way.
  13. Although I don't know you, what I do know for certain is that now is not the time for you to die. No way. From what I do know about acute psychosis is that you need to get on some type of psychotropic medication (perhaps temporary), calm your mind a bit and go into therapy, again. Reach out, no matter how awkward it may seem, to family and friends. I wish you luck.
  14. No need to regret posting anonymously. But from your words, you are in a very bad place and that sucks. You already know what you suffer from and I think that's a great first step... Acknowledgement. But you need to be brave enough to take another. Are you able to consult a licenced therapist? That would be my recommendation. No shame in that. I believe most, if not all of us here, have done that at one time or another.
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