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Andromeda

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Everything posted by Andromeda

  1. Im sorry to hear about your problems Beth . I hope you will feel better soon. Take care of yourself
  2. I have to go to see my teacher in my high school and when I think about it I feel like I will have panic attack. I know I dont have to feel like this,because Im now in university,but when I remember all painful memories from school,I feel useless like before. I was so shy and kids like to bully someone who is different I guess and I always had great grades.That didnt help. So now I feel angry at myself ,because I cant get over it. I feel so ashamed and even feel guilty .
  3. I dont know how to live my life

    1. LaLa

      LaLa

      I can relate to this... :-( Making decisions is hard and controlling one's behaviour can be even harder sometimes. However, it seems to me that so far, you've been coping relatively well: you've managed to get to university, pass many exams, despite all the problems, make good friends, ... I know it's been very hard. But there's obviously "something in you ;-)" that is skillful enough to live (to study, to endure the situation in your family, ...). Don't forget...

  4. I feel better today and my mom is fine.No Beth my brother is 17,he is not adult,but even Im older he is more strong. He is under a lot of pressure,because doctors found that he have diabet and after that he acts so bad Its hard to talk with him.I tried many times
  5. Today was awful day.My brother went completely crazy and he hurt my mother and kicked me at the stomach and now my stomach hurts a lot.I just cant take this anymore
  6. Andromeda

    anxiety

    I love picture that you sent me,Beth Thanks for support
  7. Andromeda

    anxiety

    Anxiety is so strong right now . Im starting to have even physical symptoms
  8. I want to break something :(

  9. Andromeda

    Depressed

    My mother is under a lot of stress and Its hard to talk with her.She started thinking that somebody makes her magic or something and thats why things are so bad.I guess this is just her way to cope.Im trying to keep myself busy and start to study for my exams I didnt pass last year.I have to pass them now.But its hard to study anatomy,maths and genetics now.I cant focus and Im nervous.I know it is my fault that I didnt pass them,and now I just want to sleep and rest.My teeth hurts a lot,but I cant go to dentist.This makes me nervous too I just dont want to start to self harm again or become more depressed.I dont feel so angry now,but maybe its because I supress it.I know this is not healthy way to deal with it,but maybe its for the better I dont know why I write all of this.I feel little guilty for sharing something so pathetic Thank you for hugs Lala
  10. Andromeda

    Depressed

    Thank you for being so kind with me.Im not really sure I deserved it,but its nice Well Im feeling a little better today,but its always hard to live at home.My father is becoming more and more agressive and he is screaming that me and my mother are totaly worthless (it looks a little like phyhological abuse) and sometimes physical against my mother.I just dont see a way out of all this mess.Im not sure if my father could pay rent for apartament for next month,because we dont have money
  11. Andromeda

    Depressed

    No,I dont have money for conselor.I will try to fight with depression alone.When I was in high school I fight agaist it alone soo,maybe It wont be so hard now
  12. Andromeda

    Depressed

    Im not in contact with my friends.They dont live in my city so its better not to involve them.They know about my depression and they have experience with depression too,but I cant ruin their mood when they are on holidays.And I dont want to look like weak person again.There was times that I cried on their shoulders.But I know sometimes Im too much and people have their own problems
  13. Andromeda

    Depressed

    No I dont think is good idea to talk to her,because I cant ecspress well how I feel and like I said I dont want to depressed her and I just cant talk with my brother,because he is so rude when I try to talk with him and he dont want to for walks with me like when we was kids
  14. Andromeda

    Depressed

    Thank you IJ I have walks with my aunt and they are nice,but I need to tell somebody how low I feel often,but i know I cant.There is nobody with who I can talk.After my father lost his job,everybody in home fight more and my little brother dont talk with me or when he talk he is rude to me.I know its maybe because he is teenager,but its still hurts sometimes.I know I have to find a job,but Im so tired and my father said he is disappointed of me,he is sure Im just lazy.I have to pass some exams that I didnt pass last year,but I have to pay for them :(My family have to pay.Im just burden. Im not even sure Im good at science enough. No,I dont have problems with sleeping,but night its only time when I can concentrate to write my course work. I just feel hollow and like waste of space
  15. Andromeda

    Depressed

    Im not sure if people in my life needs me.Maybe they will be better without me
  16. Andromeda

    Depressed

    Well I talked with my aunt,but I dont want to bother her,because she is depressed too I prefer not to bother.Day are not so bad,but nights are so painful.
  17. Andromeda

    Depressed

    Depression hits me again.I feel suicidal and just empty.Too much things are not fine in my life right now
  18. I need something stable in my life

  19. I like photography,Its my hobby too,but depression hits me bad this month
  20. Im just too depressed and atmosphere at home is terrible
  21. Well I like to write.It always was my way,to express feelings,but I just feel too tired.I sleep too much and my mind is mess so I cant concentrate.
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