LostBoy Posted October 7, 2017 Report Share Posted October 7, 2017 Hello All, This was originally the thread titled "Chode - I learned a new word today". It had quite a few views and no responses so it got me thinking. While it was intended to be light-hearted and something amusing in a world that has many serious topics, the more I thought about it the more I thought it might have offended some of the group and that was definitely not my intent. I was in a good mood yesterday so I chose to step out and make fun of myself and become very vulnerable to everyone by admitting my shortcomings (versus the norm of beating myself down and hiding). I was hoping others would see the humor and follow suit but since no one commented it got me thinking. Are we ever allowed to laugh at ourselves or make fun of ourselves? There are a lot of people who do this for various perceived faults (I'm also a redneck and it seems to be okay to make fun of myself for that). I was just curious if any else feels free enough to laugh at yourself (lighted-heartedly and not mockingly)? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IrmaJean Posted October 10, 2017 Report Share Posted October 10, 2017 I find self-deprication (that is light hearted and playful and not about beating oneself down) a humble trait that I admire in a person. I do it myself too at times; I think it helps to not take myself too seriously. The other day I asked a customer at work " How are you?" two times in a row. I also got stuck in the walk in freezer. Graceful as ever. It can be a way of recognizing and sharing our humanity with others, I think. In the same respect, it might not be a positive thing if it's deeply hurtful or is a means of denying inner pain or a poor self image. I think it can depend on the context and the individual. LostBoy and Lodz 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostBoy Posted October 10, 2017 Author Report Share Posted October 10, 2017 I completely agree IrmaJean. I'm not able to do it often but every once in a while I'll see or hear something that strikes me as humorous and that reminds me of me or something I would do. I feel like as long as it's light hearted it's not bad to laugh at yourself a little. It just reminds me that I'm human and not designed perfectly (no one is). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Victimorthecrime Posted October 10, 2017 Report Share Posted October 10, 2017 I think occasional self deprecating humor is a good thing. Especially if the situation crys out for it. It relives stress and engenders goodwill. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaLa Posted October 11, 2017 Report Share Posted October 11, 2017 (edited) I ignored this topic because I supposed it's specifically about laughing at one's SPS (or SP, it depends). But now I see you probably mean it rather generally... Not sure if it's a good idea, but... I feel like sharing some of the self-deprecating songs I like - to illustrate that this kind of humour may have many forms and can be very hilarious: [warning: "strong language", mainly in the 2nd song, which is, BTW, mocking the so called first world problems, but I still think it can be also classified as self-deprecating ;-) ] Also; please, listen to the whole song(s), because otherwise you'd miss the point and some of the best self-oriented 'jokes'! Hope you'll enjoy! Oh, and this is also perfect: Yeah, and he also mocked his singing (well, not sure if it's justified, but he's also seriously said in some interviews that he's not contented with his singing / that he knows it's not very good, so... this can be seen as an exaggerated "complaint" about that) ;-) Edited October 11, 2017 by LaLa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaLa Posted October 11, 2017 Report Share Posted October 11, 2017 This is also a nice example ;-) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostBoy Posted October 13, 2017 Author Report Share Posted October 13, 2017 I started this thread when I was feeling somewhat better about accepting my body for what it is and not worrying about my shortcomings in the area of penis size. I was willing to laugh (a little) at myself and even post on here about it but today I sit here and I'm down on myself about the same topic. It's strange how we go through cycles of ups and downs in life. I think this is very normal because most people have good and bad days but it's strange that something I laughed about less than a week ago now makes me feel depressed. I know that I can't do anything about my size and I know that I really am small (it's not just that I think I am small) so one would think that naturally you would get past this at some point in life. Most of my 20's I was very down on myself and my body and I did self destructive things during this entire time period to the point of my wife almost leaving me. I then went through a long period of no issues (my 30's) where I never even really thought about it. Now that I'm in my 40's I seem to find myself falling back into the same cycles as I did in my 20's. I guess this was a long winded way of saying we have good days and bad days and that we should focus on the good and try to steer clear of the things that drive us down. Lodz 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lodz Posted October 13, 2017 Report Share Posted October 13, 2017 @lostboy1 you definitely hit on something there. Sometimes i am upbeat about being small, sometimes i'm glad i don't have to worry about concealing a bulge, sometimes i have even joked about my size socially and been accepted and even admired for it. And there are other times when i just don't think about it and everyhing is fine. And then when the positive vibes fade, there i am. Tiny. Pathetic. Unrespected. Unimportant. Unsexy. I guess that's where i am right now. :-/ LostBoy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LostBoy Posted October 13, 2017 Author Report Share Posted October 13, 2017 @Lodz I completely understand. It's so strange to go from one end of the spectrum to the other. The best thing that I can come up with is to try and focus on better thoughts and try not to let the negative ones take over. This is much easier said than done for me. When I get down on my size I find myself spiraling into dark places and being almost obsessive about searching out sizes statistics or looking at pictures wondering what I did to deserve what I have (or don't have). I find myself being seriously envious of anyone with an "average" size package. Lodz 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaLa Posted October 13, 2017 Report Share Posted October 13, 2017 22 hours ago, lostboy1 said: It's strange how we go through cycles of ups and downs in life. I think this is very normal because most people have good and bad days but it's strange that something I laughed about less than a week ago now makes me feel depressed. I can relate to that; I've been having this kind of experiences all my life, too... 49 minutes ago, lostboy1 said: The best thing that I can come up with is to try and focus on better thoughts and try not to let the negative ones take over. This is much easier said than done for me. Yeah; I like your approach and I know it's quite different to want to do it that way than to actually do it ... LostBoy and Lodz 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Powerhouse8000 Posted October 14, 2017 Report Share Posted October 14, 2017 On 10/11/2017 at 7:41 PM, LaLa said: This is also a nice example ;-) This clown needs a good punch in the face to shut him up. Just because he may not feel he has any problems as a straight white male, how does he feel he can belittle other straight white men without knowing what their own individual problems and issues are? Prick. I can think of many straight white males who have worse lives than those who are not straight, white and male... A workmate of mine, when I asked him whether he thought women had easier lives than men, said "of course they do". What struck me about it most of all more than anything was the immediacy of his answer. It's like he didn't even stop to consider that leftists, feminists, academics and so on would all give the opposite answer. But when all he sees is men working hard all day and women pushing prams and walking dogs, it's easy to get that impression. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaLa Posted October 14, 2017 Report Share Posted October 14, 2017 (edited) 1 hour ago, Powerhouse8000 said: A workmate of mine, when I asked him whether he thought women had easier lives than men, said "of course they do". What struck me about it most of all more than anything was the immediacy of his answer. It's like he didn't even stop to consider that leftists, feminists, academics and so on would all give the opposite answer. But when all he sees is men working hard all day and women pushing prams and walking dogs, it's easy to get that impression. I don't get this example: What more does it say than that there are men who don't think things over and answer with their prejudices, totally sure abut them being "true"? At least you used the right word in the end: "impression". I wonder what you'd say if I mentioned the huge number of countries where women are, based on laws, religion, and customs, heavily discriminated against. You would dismiss it as "not applicable to the society you live in"? Or the one where the comedian lives in? But even more easily, I could dismiss the claim of your colleague based on my personal experience and personal impressions. What seems much less senseless is to consider arguments and precise points and explications of the ways the lives of some precise "kinds of" men and women (or other groups of people, based on, let's say, ethnicity) differ and what could be done to get rid of the existing unfairness and discriminations. (And, BTW, the song mentions several points...) I'm not saying "women have it worse". I'm convinced that it's impossible to say that all members of one group have it worse than all members of another (at least when the criterium to classify people in the groups doesn't involve well-being or suffering, of course). 1 hour ago, Powerhouse8000 said: This clown needs a good punch in the face to shut him up. I wonder if this is your typical reaction to people you don't like. Sad and potentially dangerous... He's a comedian. I see you don't get his humour and it would be OK - there are many comedians I don't like to listen to, too, so I get it. It's OK to differ in our "tastes" and preferences. But violence...??? I'd recommend you to listen to several minutes of this conversation - this part about comedians and morality: http://meaningoflife.tv/videos/39211?in=29:57 Edited October 14, 2017 by LaLa Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaLa Posted October 14, 2017 Report Share Posted October 14, 2017 BTW, @Powerhouse8000, this comedian has also a song you might appreciate in the context of your search for a girlfriend . I wonder if you'll give him a chance and have a listen: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Powerhouse8000 Posted October 14, 2017 Report Share Posted October 14, 2017 I wasn't entirely serious saying he needed to be punched in the face. But people like him are just annoying and arrogant. As I said, he may think it's funny to take the piss out of "straight white men" but I don't. Straight white men are just the same as any other people really, with their own issues and problems. Why single them out? Because they're the only group that it's OK to make fun of and making fun of anyone else is politically incorrect? I honestly think these leftists are their own worst enemy. If they say they want equality, why do they speak of straight white men as being lower than dirt, even when they themselves are members of that particular group? I agree with you when you suggest that it's impossible to generalize about members of a particular group. People of any race, ethnic group, nationality, sex, gender identity, sexual orientation, religion, [dis]ability, health, social class, age, level of income can have problems in life, and this ridiculous idea that all straight white men are somehow privileged over the rest of humanity needs to be dispensed of immediately as it is utter nonsense. If there's one thing that's strange, it's the way that politics has become a competition to try to prove who's the most needy within society. In the past, it would have been seen as pathetic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Powerhouse8000 Posted October 14, 2017 Report Share Posted October 14, 2017 5 hours ago, LaLa said: BTW, @Powerhouse8000, this comedian has also a song you might appreciate in the context of your search for a girlfriend . I wonder if you'll give him a chance and have a listen: That one was a little bit better, I will admit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaLa Posted October 15, 2017 Report Share Posted October 15, 2017 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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