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Ranting on about women


TheDane

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  • 3 months later...
On 11/13/2018 at 10:21 AM, TheDane said:

Of course you think that.....

I would still like an answer to this.
Why is it that girls who are not interested in size dont want it publized and/or participate in such interviews?

Because we are reserved and don't talk openly about such things.  We like sex to be private between 2 people!

Don't you realize that the women eager to talk have been hurt by men and are striking back?  They could probably care less if anything they say is true!  I've been hurt by men too, both emotionally and physically, but I still try to see each man as an individual, not "have fun" putting them down.  

Ok, there is some mind reading for you to ponder.  I can confirm it to be true only for some women I know personally who like to talk that way.  They think men are such evil jerks that turning things back on them is good.

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On 11/14/2018 at 2:47 PM, TheDane said:

Rhetorics class101 - topic avoidance by claiming ignorance

We can only be knowledgeable about some of the women we happen to know! 

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1 hour ago, Ruth Ann Ritchie said:

Because we are reserved and don't talk openly about such things.  We like sex to be private between 2 people!

Don't you realize that the women eager to talk have been hurt by men and are striking back?  They could probably care less if anything they say is true!  I've been hurt by men too, both emotionally and physically, but I still try to see each man as an individual, not "have fun" putting them down.  

Ok, there is some mind reading for you to ponder.  I can confirm it to be true only for some women I know personally who like to talk that way.  They think men are such evil jerks that turning things back on them is good.

That is one take on why they act like they do.

unfortunately I am too tired and depressed from not having a sexlife for 15 years and being dumped all the time due to my small penis. So my mind is not as sharp as it used to be and English is not my first language either.

I've seen that you liked som of LaLa's comments. I cant tell you how much it annoys me that when women come here it's like on a mission to stand up for themselves saying "i'm not like that" and then even defending girls like those in the video.....I would be ashamed of myself if I defended what they represent

Take LaLa for instance...... it's always a lot of wishy washy explanations as to why we shouldnt blame women for our troubles. even though people are so sad and depressed from not getting any sex at all myself included. Some even comitting suicide. But no no.... you always have an explanation. Not once have I heard," you might be right about that" or "I agree with you on that." about anything

Granted. people in here are biased against women, myself included. But there must be a hint truth beyond the bitterness

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56 minutes ago, TheDane said:

That is one take on why they act like they do.

unfortunately I am too tired and depressed from not having a sexlife for 15 years and being dumped all the time due to my small penis. So my mind is not as sharp as it used to be and English is not my first language either.

I've seen that you liked som of LaLa's comments. I cant tell you how much it annoys me that when women come here it's like on a mission to stand up for themselves saying "i'm not like that" and then even defending girls like those in the video.....I would be ashamed of myself if I defended what they represent

Take LaLa for instance...... it's always a lot of wishy washy explanations as to why we shouldnt blame women for our troubles. even though people are so sad and depressed from not getting any sex at all myself included. Some even comitting suicide. But no no.... you always have an explanation. Not once have I heard," you might be right about that" or "I agree with you on that." about anything

Granted. people in here are biased against women, myself included. But there must be a hint truth beyond the bitterness

I understand since English isn't your first language that you must have misinterpreted what I said. 

I don't blame you for disliking women who enjoy putting men down about their penises.  It is very shameful behavior regardless if it stems from being abused by men or just sadism!  I dislike women like that myself.

I would like to hear why you are so sure you are "being dumped all the time due to a small penis."  How do you know it's not in your mind?  I never thought of my husband, for instance, as being on the small side.  I've had good sex with obvious small guys, but he compulsively misinterprets good sex between us in a negative way.  He thinks I secretly hunger for a big penis like I've admitted I've had in the past. 

I'd  like to hear some details of your experiences.  Feel free to private post to me if you would feel more comfortable.  I've been leary of posting anything specific about my husband because I fear he might come to this forum!

I'm actually here because my current husband has small penis syndrome.  He hid it from me with bravado for years before and after marriage!  There were signs, but I guess I was too anxious to avoid the stereotypical male characteristics so I let everything pass.

I planned to start a thread about it to see what people think I should do about my husband.   So far, I am just trying to read some of the threads to get an idea of what small penis syndrome is all about.  

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I think that people have different needs and wants and different feelings about relationships and attraction. 

I had a conversation with someone recently about how baffling it is to me that some people can find another person attractive at first glance. It doesn't work that way for me? I need to spend time with that person, get to know and recognize them and then they may, little by little, become more attractive to me. They were equally baffled by my experience as I was by theirs.

I think we can learn from one another through open conversion and supportive listening.

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7 hours ago, IrmaJean said:

how baffling it is to me that some people can find another person attractive at first glance. It doesn't work that way for me? I need to spend time with that person, get to know and recognize them and then they may, little by little, become more attractive to me.

I'm exactly like you in this regard, IJ. I don't believe people who claim to "love" someone without really knowing the person know what love is.

I think this definition is the only 'explanation' of the notion that at least somehow works for me: "Love at first sight is what occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet."

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On 3/14/2019 at 9:39 AM, lifelongvirgin said:

I've always wondered what it is that separates the women that will accept a man who has a small penis and will love him and date him and even marry him from the women that want nothing to do with them. What is the personality trait that differentiates the two groups?

I loved and married a man with a small penis. 

I was attracted to the complete respect he gave me with no agenda to get me in bed.  This was paramount to me as I had experienced an abusive relationship in High School.  I was pretty promiscuous in College and for a few years thereafter.  Some of the sex was good for a time, but no decent relationships developed.  My relationship with my husband started at work very slowly.  Years had gone by before we talked in a personal way at all.  We finally noticed that we shared personal interests.  The first dates were more like "meet-ups" for activities we both liked though he generally did pick me up.  People would assume we were an item, but we'd laugh and say, "no, we just like to do X."

We would often have dinner to talk about our interests.  One time he drank more than usual and suddenly blurted-out that he loved me.  I expected he would make a move in the car, but nothing.in spite of me sitting close to him.  I finally took matters into my own hands, wrapped my arms around him and kissed him hard.  I stuck my tongue in his mouth.  We french kissed and made-out like school kids for a long time.  Things progressed pretty rapidly from there.  When we finally got naked some days later I was surprised how small his penis was, but wasn't concerned.  I never measured it, of course, but it did almost disappear in my hand when I grasped it.  But, it always seemed hard and ready to go.  He told me he was a virgin as I had suspected.  He orgasmed too soon to satisfy me for quite a number of our early sessions.  After I showed him how to get me stimulated before attempting intercourse, he had less trouble lasting long enough to satisfy me.

This may not be the best way for a relationship to develop.  I was clearly "on the rebound" reacting to bad experiences.  Our marriage lasted a long time but finally fell apart.  So, I'm one type of woman who had no problem accepting a man with a small penis.  I don't really know, but 2 shy people would probably be a more stable combination if a small penis is involved.  The inequality of our sexual experience was a problem.

 

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8 hours ago, lifelongvirgin said:

How old were you when this happened? I wonder what percentage of women would react the way you did? from what I hear and read it seems to me it would be a minority of women.

As a small dicked man, I married twice.  Both women had been badly abused by their father as well as while dating.  So, maybe they tolerated me in reaction to those experiences.

I was a little more assertive than the man raritchie described, but not much.  Whatever assertiveness I had was so-called Dutch Courage (alcohol--the old British put-down to the Dutch during a sea war over colonies).

So, maybe the situation isn't as rare as might be supposed.

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On 3/15/2019 at 7:28 PM, LaLa said:

II think this definition is the only 'explanation' of the notion that at least somehow works for me: "Love at first sight is what occurs when two extremely horny, but not entirely choosy people meet."

I was very "hot to trot" as is said when I entered High School. I was fully mature though still only 14 about to turn 15 in the Fall.  Parents kept older boys away from me in 7th, 8th and 9th grade which I deeply resented.  I thought I hated my parents for that.  They let me date for school and supervised dances and functions and movies if parents drove.  I always had multiple guys asking me out.  I'd basically go as far as they wanted if we could get alone somehow. 

Finally, I had intercourse with one of the boys.  It didn't last long enough to do much for me, but there was blood from bursting my hymen.  I panicked and told my parents.  They panicked too and put me on birth control pills.  I definitely wasn't choosy, but had no interest in "nerds" or boys obviously not maturing.

So, the sentence I quoted did describe me.  I was extremely horny and not very choosy.  But I didn't "fall in love" with any of the boys in Jr.  High.  I was eyeing the older boys for that.  Looking back, it must have been instinctual.  I wanted a top alpha type guy who everybody respected and followed.  I immediately "fell in love" with the Sr. football star just watching him from afar and the way he was treated when I went to High School.  I was thrilled when he hit on me.  Soon we were going "all the way" in his car.  So, I was choosy, but it was all instinct, no thinking about character, etc.  Of course, he didn't really love me at all.  After a time the relationship lead to pretty severe abuse which amazes me that I tolerated.

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Oh, I forgot part of the point I was making.  Penis size wasn't on my radar screen though I was disappointed some the Jr. High boys were "still little boys" down there.  I was looking for boys with status, but it was still fun "making out."

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On 3/16/2019 at 12:45 PM, lifelongvirgin said:

How old were you when this happened? I wonder what percentage of women would react the way you did? from what I hear and read it seems to me it would be a minority of women.

I think the more common reaction, rather than raritchie's is anger at the particular man or anger at all men.  Rather than take the blame for her behavior that provided the occasion for abuse many women last out at men for the rest of their life.

Of course, it strikes me that both reactions, are over reactions, but understandable.  A balanced reaction would be more appropriate, that's not the way of the world.

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2 hours ago, lbaker said:

I think the more common reaction, rather than raritchie's is anger and the particular man or all men.  Rather than take the blame on her behavior that provide the occasion of abuse many women lash out at men for the rest of their life.

Of course, it strikes me that both reactions, are over reactions, but understandable.  A balanced reaction would be more appropriate, that's not the way of the world.

I was angry, very angry at any man who appeared in the slightest abusive.or even normally aggressive, I guess.

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To be honest when I asked " I wonder what percentage of women would react the way you did? " I meant how you reacted to the fact he had a small penis not about the abuse.

 

I guess it's a pointless question because women will all have their own priorities and desires when it comes to penis size so asking just one woman doesn't really tell you much. That's what makes it so hard for us guys because obviously when you meet a woman you have absolutely no idea what her priorities and desires are. You won't find out either until you get undressed for the first time and you are at your most vulnerable.

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17 hours ago, lifelongvirgin said:

To be honest when I asked " I wonder what percentage of women would react the way you did? " I meant how you reacted to the fact he had a small penis not about the abuse.

I guess it's a pointless question because women will all have their own priorities and desires when it comes to penis size so asking just one woman doesn't really tell you much. That's what makes it so hard for us guys because obviously when you meet a woman you have absolutely no idea what her priorities and desires are. You won't find out either until you get undressed for the first time and you are at your most vulnerable.

Maybe not pointless you could make some guesses through conversation.  Underlying anger possibly could be detected.  I would be surprised if women want to hurt your feelings unless they are angry at you or in general against men.  But you are right that wouldn't reveal size preferences unless explicitly expressed.

But the way I reacted to his small penis was tied-up in my reaction to abuse.  My main focus was that he was not abusive or even aggressive.

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