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TheDane

Ranting on about women

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@LaLa  that is a funny vid ☺️ I suppose the slight difficulty is really getting to know them and all their faults/good points because it is unrequited, much harder work to try and imagine someone's faults.

 

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14 hours ago, jazz said:

@LaLa  that is a funny vid ☺️ I suppose the slight difficulty is really getting to know them and all their faults/good points because it is unrequited, much harder work to try and imagine someone's faults.

Did he blame himself for not asking her out?  I didn't watch the whole video, but that would be my obsession when attracted.  I can't imagine sitting around building a fantasy about the person.

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@smallguy  No, he never asks her out, too caught up in the fantasy of how wonderful he thinks she is. He does buy some barbecue charcoal from her though (that he doesn't need!)

Too busy adoring to worry about blaming himself.

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Growing up I went through this a few times where I would become infatuated with girls and became obsessed with them. I would think about them 24/7 but I never assumed they were perfect or flawless like the guy in the video. I would just fantasize what it would be like to be with them even to the point of imagining that we were married. Strangely though I never thought of them in a sexual way.

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6 hours ago, jazz said:

@smallguy  No, he never asks her out, too caught up in the fantasy of how wonderful he thinks she is. He does buy some barbecue charcoal from her though (that he doesn't need!)

Too busy adoring to worry about blaming himself.

Yeah, must be a defense mechanism!

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5 hours ago, lifelongvirgin said:

Growing up I went through this a few times where I would become infatuated with girls and became obsessed with them. I would think about them 24/7 but I never assumed they were perfect or flawless like the guy in the video. I would just fantasize what it would be like to be with them even to the point of imagining that we were married. Strangely though I never thought of them in a sexual way.

I became obsessed with a number of girls from grade school on through High School.  In grade school we would play together and even hold hands.  In middle school girls would even throw themselves at me.  But, I wouldn't respond because I knew I wasn't maturing like the other boys.  Soon, girls knew I wasn't maturing also and lost interest in me. 

I still had my favorites but no longer even talked to any girls.  I fantasized we were dating and soon started masturbating about them after 9th grade.  I didn't have the absurd fantasies of perfect, but I thought they were very special.  I met some of them at my 50 year HS reunion.  They still seemed special. 

We didn't talk about how weird I was in HS except one who had a locker next to her for 3 years which I did remember, but never knew her name.  She said she was highly insulted I never talked to her or even nodded.  I just laughed and said I hardly talked to anyone.  She was very attractive in HS and very social.  I was totally intimidated by how "cool" or "with it" she was in High School.

I never asked a girl out until my last year of college when I started drinking heavy.  Drinking lowered my inhibitions and allowed my weak libido to cause action.

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My dating success improved dramatically when I stopped asking girls out.  I just want to have fun.

Then they started asking me out.

It made all the difference. 

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