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“Finally, A New Emoji...”


Klingsor

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Thanks for responding Klingsor.  I remember you hated that job.  I wish I could quit mine.  I guess things got unbearable there.  

Take a break.  Get back to the job search as your able.  Sometimes there are more possibilities than we at first see.  

I hear ya about being exhausted.  Hope you catch a break.  Keep us posted please.  

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I know I have no right to be upset, it's your path, not mine. But we're friends, Kling. There's hope for you, we're the same size for Christ's sake. Please don't give up. But if you do, I get it and I'm not pissed off. It's just more fucking bullshit. I can't sleep, I'm thinking about you, then Tom, then you again. It's not your fault I feel that way, but it hurts anyway. Tell me what I can do and I'll do it. Come here and live with us, I'll put you up in the spare room for as long as you need (genuine offer, couldn't be more serious). Start a new life in the UK. Change your focus to something, anything until the cloud has passed. After that, if you're still wanting out, I'll kill you myself lol. Message me, mate. Or at least message someone. 

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I appreciate everyone’s well wishes. Sorry for being melodramatic. I had a million things happen all at once last week not all SPS related. The job situation is still in the air pending discussions but I’m checked out mentally. No motivation or desire for anything but sleep/death. I’m not equipped (pun intended) to deal with life. 

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21 minutes ago, TheDane said:

Is the job problem because of workload stress or small penis bullying?

@TheDane - in the past he had stated that his office exhibits a hyper-macho culture where every male must either be a prodigious family man or a young stud tagging everything that moves.  Those men falling into neither category are suspected of either homosexuality or beta status, the latter opening the door to derisions regarding size and form of ones external genitalia. 

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I’m an engineer. I work in heavy industry. It’s pointless to try and explain this to anyone who isn’t familiar with it. A guy my age who isn’t married or actively dating women is suspected of being homosexual or extremely strange. In either case it amounts to the same thing because you won’t make friends, get any respect or get promotions. That has been my experience. I work for a smaller company now which introduces its own brand of bullshit and drama. And there are cultural considerations too. 

 I don’t have much to contribute to SPS anymore. There’s no point. All I know is it’s fucked my life up beyond recognition. 

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Isn't that an opportunity to find a new job? If you think the "culture" there would be the same, perhaps you could come there, among people who don't know you, with a made-up back-story, like being a widower (who's not ready to date anyone because of grief). I know it doesn't sound ideal, but it's just one of possible options; the one that quickly came to my mind. And I would say that even that seems better to me than giving up on life as a whole... :( I know it's subjective (-what is "better"). I know it's terribly hard on you to be in this situation, with these experiences. But you've been living in a bubble of stupidly biased (in their vies of masculinity and relationships) people, so you're also biased (because of them) in your view of people and possible relationships (thinking it's impossible for you to have friends among colleagues, for instance).

Could you ask for help a social worker who would help to manage your search for a new job as well as searching for help with your mental health? I know it doesn't sound "appealing", but it might help, so who cares about apparences, fears ...

I hope you won't leave the forum; you'd be missed and... possibly, you'd also miss some people from here.

Hang in there, you're more a important person than you can see now...

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It's a bizarre concept to even have to justify why you're single. But I can tell you from experience (unfortunately) that it doesn't matter if you're married with kids or single, people are just fucked in the head. If you show weakness, anyone weaker will pounce to make themselves feel stronger. You end up being a complete lie in work, half speculation, half absolute fabrication and you just have to navigate it. If I looked normal, you wouldn't know me from Adam. If I was my old self, you wouldn't want to know me from Adam. But when you're just trying to get your head down and you have anxiety/social issues, you ping the radar hard. Two choices, be a cunt or don't work. Not all work places are like that, but most are, even the ones that tout themselves as the opposite. In the words of Chopper Read "It's human bloody nature". Men are being villainised in society atm, so what would be considered sexual harassment if the roles were reversed isn't considered anything at all. And most guys are too proud to complain for fear of drawing more attention to themselves. I can't give any advice with workplace nightmares because I don't work. I can't imagine what it'd be like working daily without options, it'd be rough. But we have to stay strong for eachother and for ourselves. We matter, despite what we or others might think. All sounds wishy washy af, but it's true. If you're struggling, reach out. I'm speaking to a whole bunch of guys from here privately on WhatsApp, let me know of you wanna do that. No pressure, just someone to talk to in person who's going through the same shit and won't judge or ridicule. It's helped me a lot. 

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To be honest I've never had that kind of problem at work and I spent 8 1/2 years in the Navy. I'm a completely different person when I'm around people than when I'm by myself.

 

does anyone else find it infuriating that women have two hand gestures to mock us with (the finger pinch and the pinky finger) and we have nothing to fire back with.

 

I'm going to talk with my therapist this afternoon maybe she will have an answer.

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