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Hi LInda,

I am going to post this in the right section now , LOL . Your 13 yr old has PDD , and my 16yr old has autism too. I have told myself many times that I did not think I could handle anther child after having Matthew . I am ao impressed with your abillity to have 7children ;)

When Matthew was small he was very out of control and echolia , just would repeat in 3 words the last he heard someone said. His speech was non functional until age 5. Now he loves to talk about , his interests... One sided conversations. He was on ADHD meds at the age of 4, because he was so hyperactive and aggressive. Now, he grew out of the hyperactivity, and does not take any meds. However, when he is bored more autistic behavior appear. He is also unfocused at times , and will keep getting up , to do other stuff, and then back to the same actvity a few min. later.

Matt is also a big boy ... he is picky about food , but loves to eat his favorite ones.. He is cognitive delayed as well, and although he is big , taller then me now, people still think he is younger then he really is.

He gets along better with adults and older kids. Younger kids are mean as hell , and bully him. Matthew , is more on an 7-8 yr old level emotionally , and cognitively , and kids can be absolutely cruel.

I protect him from any amount of bullying, and put a stop to it quickly. kids in his Classroom are fine. Adults are understanding with him too.

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Matthew is at school today .He goes on the bus at 6:15am and is not home until 4:50pm. Matt has to go out of town in order to be in the right classroom for his needs. When he is gone I feel a little lost. It is amazing how much energy is put in , when he is home, and how much he impacts my world. He is my world, now when he is away , it is difficult. Sometimes, I let him stay home, just because ... Shame on me, but, he has such long days at school .

Even though his conversations are one sided and always on the same subjects he is entertaining, and now it is all too quiet.

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You are so right Linda,

their needs to be balance :) I try very hard to keep my issues separate , and not divulge anything upsetting about what goes on personally with myself. Since Matthew is more concerned about having his things, and hie movies, dates, names of actors , dates , it has worked out.

At 16, he is a pretty happy teenager, and that is how I like to keep things .My brother is very good at helping, and loves his nephew. They hit it off well. The whole reason why i moves to this small town was to be closer to him and have family that I could be myself around, and he and his cousin could grow up being friends, knowing each other. :cool:

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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Mscat,

We know how hard you work with your son and how much energy you have put into getting him the help he needs. But, Linda raises a good point and you seem to agree: that you need a life of your own where your needs are met separate from your son.

That has been hard for you, has it not?

Allan :)

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Yes it is. I am a single parent, have been for the 16yrs + years he has been on earth. my life changed for the better for a long time after he was born. I grew up, took resonsibilty , and the focus changed in my life. He is number one importance .

He's not here most of the day, so i am alone with our 2 small dogs all day long. i am fully disabled physically and emotionally and stuggle with that most of the time in which i keep separate from my son.

I do not ever go out of my apartment alone, because of fear and panic, and the inability to drive right now alone very far. Thankfully my 2 dogs brings me much comfort. I have to spend time away from my son, he is a big chalenge and handful to say the least. This kid only communicates one sided conversations, and alwas repeats his interests in mind, and it is the same thing. Over and over again. He's loud, overbearing, and demanding. As well as very young for his age, because of the cognitive delays he has as well as the autism.

Fortunately, he is into his movies , and enjoys watching them over and over again especially certain sentences or parts . He does this on U tube as well. with head phones.

I definately need my space away from him, he is a great person, but just a handful.

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It is better now that he is older. Just now dealing with a young man, who uses vulgar language, and is cognitivly delayed, and bigger then I. He's loud, at times, demading, and can be extremely chalenging. Glad he goes to school . At times.

Physically , I am unable not to do much , because of terrible pain still ... that never goes away. At nights are even worse . I start phyical therapy next week , and have a contracture. in my left arm, where i am unable to straighten out the arm fully or extend it. Most of my body is very stiff and painful .

just today, I got my handicap plates and a placecard for my car. a perm one. Now it is a double wammy , the mental issues, and the physical issues, are nearly unabearable.

However, i have to stay strong for Matthew, my son. He is going to need me for the rest of his life.

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