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  • 1 month later...
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And The "POLITICALLY CORRECT" Axe Falls On Me AGAIN..After 31/2 Months Of Working My Rear End Off, Coming To Work Early & Never Missing A Day. I Was Informed My Services Are No Longer needed.

All Because ONE Individual Decided To Play A Race Card Do To His Own Insecurity. I Became The Target & Guinea Pig. Born The Wrong Color & Wrong Sex In The Wrong ERA. Paying For Others Past Sins. Sorry If I Offend Any Of You Who Happen To Read This But I Am Tired Of All My Hard Work Going Down The Toilet Because Of Some one's Dislike.

At 53yrs. Old I Have Had & Seen Enough Of This Continuing BSSSSSSSSSSSS.

At Some Point Balance & Fairness Need To Take Place In A Society Full Of Hate, Mistrust, Favoritism, Racism & Bias.

So Down The Dark Long Path I Go Again........Still Alone & No One Gives A Shit............

Ya I'm Pissed......................................And Im Tired Of Running Scared, Being Shit On & Afraid To Be Me &n Speak My Mind While Others Can Say Anything They Want

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And The "POLITICALLY CORRECT" Axe Falls On Me AGAIN..After 31/2 Months Of Working My Rear End Off, Coming To Work Early & Never Missing A Day. I Was Informed My Services Are No Longer needed.

All Because ONE Individual Decided To Play A Race Card Do To His Own Insecurity. I Became The Target & Guinea Pig. Born The Wrong Color & Wrong Sex In The Wrong ERA. Paying For Others Past Sins. Sorry If I Offend Any Of You Who Happen To Read This But I Am Tired Of All My Hard Work Going Down The Toilet Because Of Some one's Dislike.

At 53yrs. Old I Have Had & Seen Enough Of This Continuing BSSSSSSSSSSSS.

At Some Point Balance & Fairness Need To Take Place In A Society Full Of Hate, Mistrust, Favoritism, Racism & Bias.

Hi Jim. I was hoping your absence was due to good things happening. But...sometimes we just can't catch a break. Sorry you're still dealing with so much. I know somebody who blew the whistle on some financial fraud at one of the big 3 auto companies. He was ostracised, passed over for promotions, treated like the bad guy. Well, he went up the chain of command and now they are paying him disability for all the emotional distress (and probably to shut him up). If there's serious wrongdoing, you can always fight them. Do what this guy did or hire an employment lawyer for wrongful dismissal on the basis of race/sex - whatever is provable. If you can get on tape an admission of guilt, I've found that works rather well.

So Down The Dark Long Path I Go Again........Still Alone & No One Gives A Shit............

Ya I'm Pissed......................................And Im Tired Of Running Scared, Being Shit On & Afraid To Be Me &n Speak My Mind While Others Can Say Anything They Want

Well, I give a shit Jim. I hate, hate, hate to see persecution on the basis of race or gender. If my memory and social skills were better I'd probably go into politics to try to bring about changes in this area. Sorry that my giving a damn doesn't help you, but at least you know somebody cares.
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  • 5 weeks later...

It has been a long time since I have logged on to the site. I'm sorry to hear what has happened to you. You more than anyone deserved to have something stable and sound.

If you are still reading these messages I feel you are getting a lot of what I am.. people not responding back to you on basic things.. and it feels cold, apethetic. It is a new norm in society to ignore tough questions rather than give replies that require effort. That is one thing I love about this site you can tell people actually care.. and it makes such a difference to those that are hurting.

I hope this helps but I have found the ignoring or seeming to not care is complicated. I will give one example that just happened. I had a friend I would get together with several times a month. He stopped coming on for a bit then popped back up. Sent him invites to hang out.. no response. Tried off and on for 2 months to get in touch with no luck. Finally next time I saw him on I asked why the silent treatment? he didn't respond but accepted my next inv. We had a good time and he acted like nothing changed.. nothing happened. Afterwards he wrote a message saying he had a good time and we would have to do it again.

I don't understand it.. don't know half of what is going on in this crazy world..

but it seems like it is complicated often times.. and it sems like not all of it is based off of hate and cold disinterest like I was personally feeling and thinking. I felt so hurt.. now I'm just simply confused ;P

Like Athena I care as well and hope your doing ok. You guys and others here pulled me out of the darkness. Never will forget that. I have said it often... but again thank you.

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  • 2 weeks later...

I Want To Thank You For Your Responses. And I Am Sorry I Did Not Respond Right Back.....Just A Lot On My Plate Right Now And I Just Don't Know What Direction To Go Anymore???????

As far As My Three Children...My Twins Are Doing Fine & Continuing To Pursue Their Goals. My Oldest Now Has A Job & Seems To Continue Improving...Although I Still See Signs That Bother Me.......

Either Way I'm Just Not Sure Of My Own Future........I Came Back To Be Near My Three Children.......They Now Slowly Will Be Going Their Own Way & Moving Ahead And Forward With Their Own Lives.......I Again Have No Money, No Job, And I'm Tired Of Relying On Others Myself...........

I Try To Play it One Day At A Time..........I Just Wish I Saw All Of This Coming Years Ago & Had Planned Better For MYSELF.......It Sucks Not Having A Job, Money Or A Place To Call My Own & MY HOME.......I Have Myself To Blame In Some ways I Guess.....Being A Solitary Person I Have Alienated Myself & Trust Of Others..........

Right Now If I Ever Get Work Again I See Myself Working Until I Die & Never Making Enough To Be Independent Of Others....I Don't Even See Myself Finding Love Of A Woman Again........Funny Just As A Lady & I At Work Were Getting To Know Each Other They Released Me........

As For Athena & Random You Have Also Stuck With Me From The Beginning...Somehow Someway I Have To Use This As Motivation As Well As The Fact I Have Three Children..........My Dad's Life Was So Different & He Was My Role Model.........He Succeeded & I Have Failed......Of Course His Wife Stuck With Him & Mine Did A Number On Me.........So I Just Have To Figure It How To Live My Own Life & Somehow Enjoy Life Until I'm Gone............

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I Try To Play it One Day At A Time..........I Just Wish I Saw All Of This Coming Years Ago & Had Planned Better For MYSELF.......It Sucks Not Having A Job, Money Or A Place To Call My Own & MY HOME.......I Have Myself To Blame In Some ways I Guess.....Being A Solitary Person I Have Alienated Myself & Trust Of Others..........

I planned very well and it still didn't work out. **** happens.

Right Now If I Ever Get Work Again I See Myself Working Until I Die & Never Making Enough To Be Independent Of Others....I Don't Even See Myself Finding Love Of A Woman Again........Funny Just As A Lady & I At Work Were Getting To Know Each Other They Released Me........

You know, I came across some college courses that only take a year and one can be earning decent money upon graduation. One was 'Community Support Worker'. There are government services that help pay for the majority of the cost too. There's huge demand for graduates and there are many fields to work in from mental health, youth services to immigration. Basically helping people. I bet you could enjoy and excel at something like that. I have come to the realization that I will probably have to work for the rest of my life too. So I'm seeking out career options that I are motivating. It took me a long time to get my head around 'working forever'. But it's not so bad if you can just find some direction. I also think that once you take care of yourself, you will find somebody special...

As For Athena & Random You Have Also Stuck With Me From The Beginning...Somehow Someway I Have To Use This As Motivation As Well As The Fact I Have Three Children..........My Dad's Life Was So Different & He Was My Role Model.........He Succeeded & I Have Failed......Of Course His Wife Stuck With Him & Mine Did A Number On Me.........So I Just Have To Figure It How To Live My Own Life & Somehow Enjoy Life Until I'm Gone............

Don't be so hard on yourself. You succeeded for a lot of years Jim. It is easy to look at the present circumstances and say that you failed but you haven't. You've just lost your way at the moment. Why not try the 're-education' route. I bet you could find some free career counselling services. Applying for low-skill jobs that everybody else wants is a tough slog. And they're not the most satisfying jobs either.

Anyway, I'm sorry life is so hard on you still Jim. I hope that you can take some of my comments to heart and find a little hope for getting out of your situation. I'll be here whenever you need a little support, and I know Random will be too...Take care of yourself Jim.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 2 weeks later...

Jim..I know that I have not participated in this forum much at all..to many memories of things long past.

I just want to let you know I still think of you and only hope the very best for you..you and I have had to many great discussions in that past. I just don't want things to end the way they did and that I sincerely and only wish you well.

things have changed drasitcally in our lives..I have had many losses in the last few months..however..my dear mother keeps going...and it has truly become a mystery for me as why she does. I have sold, given away many things just to survive..I know that you know what that is like..I am not far behind you my friend at all..the days of riding free on my horse are long over now..they all have gone to new homes save for one who so far I can keep close to me.. I have lost many friends..but have gained new ones in their absensce...I truly did not want to loose your friendship as well...

May never respond..thats ok..I just want you to know many things have change and I still think of our great coversations of the past...love to you.

Shannon

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Sorry I have not been on here as much as I used to. Things are so busy, yet what do we ever get done eh? Never forget the lessons we picked up here even in the toughest times. Your a great person Jim. Your going through tough times but it doesn't change who you are.

As for me thought I was on the right path again like you. Actually 2 weeks ago had another girlfriend after all this time. Things were going great.. she really cared for me. Then found out just like my last GF she had a physically abusive ex!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Guy ripped up her clothes 3 days ago, she said she was going to meet me today and figure out what to do, her phone was off all day.

Here we go again.

Not going to let it change me like last time. Learning from mistakes.

Still what is the chance.. I gave up on dating.. she found me. I can't seem to get away from abusive men. Sorry Jim not meaning to dump on here.

Just wanted to let ya know often things in life tend to loop.. just grow a little stronger each time. Get a little further along. I did kiss her twice.. that is a new record for me lol.. second and third kiss I have ever had.

Always thinking about everyone here. This site has been such a blessing.

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Hi Jim, Random. Both of you are good strong, people, and I admire you both so much.

Don't let the bad times get to you, one day I know you will find the happiness you deserve. You are in my thoughts even when I don't post - sometimes I find it too hard to put into words what I want to say. Take care. ((((((hugs)))))) M.

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Thank you. I use the lessons I have learned from here everyday. I was upset, but just wanted Jim to know we are always here for him. A lot of us here life keeps punching us but we grow stronger.. we get to where we can take even the low blows.

As an update I got a odd random email from the girl I was dating's cousin, said she was in rehab and would be for some time. Not even sure how she got my number or knew of me. Tried to get in touch with the person to find out what happened with no luck. Lot of people hurting out there.

So it wasn't me that caused the break up this time, just life.

I use this site as a buffer zone when I am hurting. When I start to hurt the worst I think of my friends here, all the lessons I learned.. all the positive comments, feelings.. and how others struggle.. fight against the pain. It gets me through most of it. Helped heal me more than I would be right now.

Maybe saved my life at times.. not sure. Still going through crazy stuff like Jim, like most of us, seems like for some people it never stops. But I am coping with it a bit better at times. Because of this site, because of the friends I met here. Even the tiny escapes from pain, when pain is all you know, are like miracles. Thank you to everyone reading this :)

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Hi Jim, Random and a few others who have checked in here. I just wanted to touch base and say Hello because I'm not here that often. Trying to meet people face to face for a change :eek:...and with a renewed effort not to make it such a rollercoaster ride. I've learned a fair bit over the last year...from my T, from people here and on another site, from failed relationships. I hope I have learned enough to be able to have more healthy relationships. We shall see...

Hope all is well with you guys.

Take Care,

C

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Great to hear from everyone. Hope Jim is doing better.

..I think the woman I was dating was a scam..

Feel so stupid. What I didn't mention she asked for rent money said she was about to get evicted. I gave it to her, then is when all the crazy story happened. I hope I'm wrong.. but I think I fell for a scam.. I feel so used and hurt right now :[

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Hi Athena, so glad to hear you are trying again and haven't given up. Good luck!

Random, I'm so sorry to hear you are feeling so used and hurt. Do you know for sure she lied to you? Perhaps it wasn't a scam and she was telling the truth? I hope you find peace and happiness Random, you deserve it.

Hi Jim, hope you are doing okay.

Take care everyone. M.

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Yes unfortunately it was a scam. today I called her and she answered by mistake. her: Hello Me: Hey how are you? her: holding the phone away "OMG" almost laughter small pause click...

But I'm ok. I'm stronger than I was. Before it would have devastated me.

I am hurt I won't lie. But I will survive. We hurt but we must carry on.

We either conquer the pain or have it conquer us.

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..thank you. I'm ok, hurt yes but not devastated. I didn't love her like I did my ex gf. Part of me wanted to get revenge either by taking her to court or pestering her till she gave me my money back.. but I let it go..

I'll give it to God, people that do things like that suffer far worse than I will over time.. they cause their own pain.

..what really stinks that I told no one I gave her something of my grandmother's.. nothing expensive but it meant something to me, and I know though I asked for it back.. I'll never see it again.

See the thing is I wanted so hard to believe that I found someone to love me for who I am, even though so many triggers went off saying something wasn't right I still fell for it all.

Hope Jim is doing better. Know things have been hard for him.

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