Hate having a 4" erect penis

[MrOkay]

I all ready told you ways to get around your size but you choose to complain and feel sorry for yourself. I'm not exactly large at 6-1/2in erect but I don't complain about it.

One last time. Go to Extreme Restraints and choose a Penis Extender. They're fairly cheap and you just might find that you like it.

You don't complain because there is nothing to complain about. You have about two inches on us guys.

[Wastedlife]

I'll give you two instances. About three years ago, I was working as a clerk in an office. An attractive brunette was really coming on to me a lot. She was about 30, a good 15 years younger than me. I'm not saying she was an angel, if she liked someone she'd tell them. One day she said, 'what do you think about friends with benefits?' I said, 'that's a cool idea'. And she said 'wanna be my friend with benefits'. Yeah, what me with my 3 incher? I couldn't see it, so I made my excuses and said I was married and didn't cheat. That's what having a small penis does to someone. Ha ha, I have thought about that woman every day for the past three years. I laugh about it, but what else can I do? I wasn't gonna take that risk of her laughing at me.

God I had so many of those instances as well, could have had so many women...but you just turn it down and make excuses because you know you don't have what those women are looking for, they want a man's penis not child's (this fact alone that most 15 year Old's got bigger penis then me is unbelievably depressing)... On one side I can have most women I want but then I cant, its so cruel. Three dam inches stand between me and as perfect life as someone can have...I really hope they come up with some sort of penis enlargement procedure soon (I'm most likely deluding myself but its all I got...)

[flander]

be thankful that you have those chances

[Wastedlife]

be thankful that you have those chances

Yeah nothing better then knowing women is interested in you but you cant deliver on what she wants...oh joy...I’m so grateful

[flander]

having the option to go for it and not giving a shit if she gets what she wants is better than not having that option at all

[gone]

Yeah, 'they' say size doesn't matter but it does.

As a man with a small one I am not confident having sex any more. And what makes things worse is that in those nine years I have been without sex I have had countless opportunities to have it. But I have either refused or ran away from it, because of the humiliation I'd feel - and I know any potential sex partner would be disappointed.

I'll give you two instances. About three years ago, I was working as a clerk in an office. An attractive brunette was really coming on to me a lot. She was about 30, a good 15 years younger than me. I'm not saying she was an angel, if she liked someone she'd tell them. One day she said, 'what do you think about friends with benefits?' I said, 'that's a cool idea'. And she said 'wanna be my friend with benefits'. Yeah, what me with my 3 incher? I couldn't see it, so I made my excuses and said I was married and didn't cheat. That's what having a small penis does to someone. Ha ha, I have thought about that woman every day for the past three years. I laugh about it, but what else can I do? I wasn't gonna take that risk of her laughing at me.

On another occasion I met a woman from work for coffee. Again she was attractive and had her own appartment. She told me she did and lived on her own. Somehow, we started talking about sex. I don't know how it happened but it did. It wasn't me who raised the subject that's for sure. And out of the blue she said, 'do you wanna come back to my place.' Look I am not saying it would have led to sex, but I wasn't gonna take that risk so I refused.

Those are just two instances where having a small one has badly affected my life. I have many many more stories but won't bore you.

I gotta admit, the very first time I took my now wife out this happened. I walked her up to her door, said goodnight and gave her a little peck on the lips. She just stood there and then asked if I wanted to come in for a while.

I have no idea if anything would have happened either, but I wasn't going to find out. I made up some very lame excuse (had to go into work early or sumphin like that.) and left.

I only took her out to get a friends wife to shut the hell up. I had no plans for a second date, and didn't really care what she thought about me cutting out. I didn't really give that date a second thought.

John

[Wastedlife]

having the option to go for it and not giving a shit if she gets what she wants is better than not having that option at all

I guess that's the difference between you and me, I care that she gets what she wants.

[flander]

that is irrelevant. Whether one cares or not, having the option to try is still better than no option at all.

[malign]

Wasted, the real difference between your position and flander's is that you're certain that she'll be unsatisfied before you even try.

He's not suggesting "ripping her off" in some way, he's talking about trying, and seeing whether she's satisfied. The probability may be lower than for larger guys, he's just saying it's not zero, and you are.

[Notdoneyet]

MrOkay, I'm not going to imply that being samller than average isn't a handicap for any of us.

However, those of you who continue to deprive yourself of a sex life are only hurting yourselves.

If you take the approach tat it is for YOU, rather than whomever you are doing it with you wil

find plenty of receivers. Just down't expect them to "go Dutch" whne on a date.

[Wastedlife]

Wasted, the real difference between your position and flander's is that you're certain that she'll be unsatisfied before you even try.

He's not suggesting "ripping her off" in some way, he's talking about trying, and seeing whether she's satisfied. The probability may be lower than for larger guys, he's just saying it's not zero, and you are.

Look I understand its not zero and that there are women out there who might be fine with a guy that has small penis. But odds of you being humiliated and possibility of everyone in your circle of friends or family finding out about your small penis is just to much, I can go without having sex for a long time, I can even go without a women for the rest of my life. But if I was ousted to people around me, that would destroy me. I would have to leave my family/friends and move to Alaska or something...

[malign]

You know, it's not my job to question your personal decisions, Wasted. Everyone assesses risk for themselves; no one else can do it for us.

Risk is a combination of two things: an estimated probability of how likely it might be for some bad thing to happen, and an estimate of how bad it would be if the thing did happen. Both estimates are subject to cognitive distortion, though; what you could call "exaggeration" (from a different point of view, it could be "minimization"; again, it all depends on one's point of view.) Fear can make both estimates larger than reality. Limited experience can also distort them; if the bad thing happens the first time you try it, you may walk away with the impression that it will always happen and never try again. On the other hand, if the outcome is one that the person is especially sensitive to, or has poor defenses against, it seems worse than it is. No one has ever died directly from embarrassment, but I imagine that a fair number have killed themselves from not being able to cope with it.

There are no lies, and hopefully few distortions, in that last paragraph. Instead, I've confined the opinions to this one. The above suggests some possible courses of action: find safer situations to try again, to see if the fear is justified, or work on how you would handle embarrassment so that it doesn't hurt as much. An example of the first idea would be to try to date a woman from out of town, who doesn't know any of your friends or family. The other could perhaps occur in therapy, or by using online CBT exercises. And they're not mutually exclusive.

And I know that either one sounds hopeless to you. But I'm not suggesting them to make you feel worse ...

[Jeep]

.

[Jessie]

I have been through airport scanners in the uk.

Yeah they probably did laugh at my expense at coffee break but they didnt know me and I wont hear their comments.

So it didnt really bother me.

[sophia]

Hi,

I am new to this forum and was reading this thread and I realize that it has been inactive for some time but I really felt compelled to reply after reading some of your personal stories about your struggle with a small penis. I came across this forum because I was doing some research on the internet about surgery because my fiance is considering enlarging his penis even though I am ardently opposed to it. My fiance is 5'4" and has a 4.5" penis and I not only love him to pieces but am incredibly attracted to him. I know that some of you say that being shorter with smaller penises limits your options in terms of women, and I don't know how to describe myself except to say that I am his ideal woman. I am 5"4" , 133 pounds am very fit (because I do a lot of strength training and have a lot of muscle mass in my legs and arms , which he LOVES btw) and have a large chest, and what he calls an hourglass figure. i don't think i'm ugly either and have never had a shortage of guys who liked me or were interested in me. I feel silly for including these details but I think its absolutely ridiculous that some of you think that you dont have options in terms of women. I have dated guys much taller, much more endowed, more conventionally attractive and even more successful career wise, and my current fiance makes me happier than I've ever been before. I will admit that it took me some time to warm up to him and that he was very persistent, and we are more conservative so we started having sex only after we were very serious about each other. He Is AMAZING at sex and works very hard to make me feel very good. there are a few constrictions (not being able to move back and forth as much and when I'm on top I worry that he'll slip out) but he more than makes up for it with creativity. and OMG with his tongue. trust me, women are less concerned about size than men are and no one goes around with measuring tape. after having been with my fiance for over two years and after him mentioning enlargement, i pulled out some cloth measuring tape while I was going down on him (lol) to size him up and thats how i found out. but i couldn't care less, its really about what he does with those inches that counts. and also, in terms of height, it sucks that i can't wear heels but i love that we're the same height because when he's on top, we can kiss the entire time.

appearances matter when it comes to attraction of course. but women can be attracted to a lot more than just appearance (or size) for that matter. I wasn't attracted to my fiance when we first met. Now, I can't get enough of his face. Or his penis

[mts]

--

[augustwest]

I'm 4" erect and have no problems having sex or wearing a condom. I read about lots of similar sized people saying they can't have 'normal' sex and I don't get it. Maybe psychologivally they feel inadequate and that ruins their sex. I say work with what you got and go for it. I have plenty of sex.

[dvnJ22]

Hi,

I am new to this forum and was reading this thread and I realize that it has been inactive for some time but I really felt compelled to reply after reading some of your personal stories about your struggle with a small penis. I came across this forum because I was doing some research on the internet about surgery because my fiance is considering enlarging his penis even though I am ardently opposed to it. My fiance is 5'4" and has a 4.5" penis and I not only love him to pieces but am incredibly attracted to him. I know that some of you say that being shorter with smaller penises limits your options in terms of women, and I don't know how to describe myself except to say that I am his ideal woman. I am 5"4" , 133 pounds am very fit (because I do a lot of strength training and have a lot of muscle mass in my legs and arms , which he LOVES btw) and have a large chest, and what he calls an hourglass figure. i don't think i'm ugly either and have never had a shortage of guys who liked me or were interested in me. I feel silly for including these details but I think its absolutely ridiculous that some of you think that you dont have options in terms of women. I have dated guys much taller, much more endowed, more conventionally attractive and even more successful career wise, and my current fiance makes me happier than I've ever been before. I will admit that it took me some time to warm up to him and that he was very persistent, and we are more conservative so we started having sex only after we were very serious about each other. He Is AMAZING at sex and works very hard to make me feel very good. there are a few constrictions (not being able to move back and forth as much and when I'm on top I worry that he'll slip out) but he more than makes up for it with creativity. and OMG with his tongue. trust me, women are less concerned about size than men are and no one goes around with measuring tape. after having been with my fiance for over two years and after him mentioning enlargement, i pulled out some cloth measuring tape while I was going down on him (lol) to size him up and thats how i found out. but i couldn't care less, its really about what he does with those inches that counts. and also, in terms of height, it sucks that i can't wear heels but i love that we're the same height because when he's on top, we can kiss the entire time.

appearances matter when it comes to attraction of course. but women can be attracted to a lot more than just appearance (or size) for that matter. I wasn't attracted to my fiance when we first met. Now, I can't get enough of his face. Or his penis

There are guys here smaller then that (me included) and our options are limited, I've just taken mine off the table.

I really don't see what I can take away from this, But I think this story may help other guys here around that size, and I'm happy for that.

[Jessie]

I'll ask it - whats his girth?

and unless you had him standing up with a bone pressed dorsal measurement you under- measured him.

He's likely 5 or 5.25.

You may think Im nitpicking, well I of course I am, but it affects his placement in the bell curve.

It probably hurts him terribly about his slipping out and your well endowed exes.

Btu thank you for posting- I have saved the page to re-read

[sophia]

Welcome! Dont have much time to post.

How does he react to your enthusiasm/praise? Also, there may be other difficult factors, Does he know/is he jealous of your past lovers, does he feel embarrassed socially and if so how would you deal with that etc.

How does sex with your current less well endowed man compare to sex with the large ones? Isn't it more intense feelng with a big penis?

Hi,

Those are really insightful questions. At first he had trouble when I gave him positive feedback because he was reluctant to believe that I was enjoying having sex with him. He had to get to a point where he really trusted me and felt confident in our relationship to be able to take the praise, which he does now and he gets very flattered. I think he feels safe and comfortable and confident in the space we've created, and it comes through in our intimacy- everything from kissing to oral sex. He is not jealous of guys I've been with in the past, again at first he was jealous because he didnt feel like I liked him the way he liked me so his jealousy stemmed from this fear that I would leave him for someone better. He wasn't just jealous of guys I'd been with before , he was jealous when guys expressed interest in me early in our relationship or my guy friends. We got past that initial stage where his insecurity fed his jealousy, and we did because he was really kind to me and honest about how he felt. Now he has a sense of pride lol that I "chose" him over these others. When we go out socially, he does still feel a little embarrassed- he often says things that really hurt my heart about how he doesnt feel like he's handsome enough or hot enough for me and how everyone must feel so bad for me because I'm with him. He is very aware of how we are being perceived and It takes some work on my part for me to reassure him that that isn't true and that all that matters is how I feel about him. Its so ironic because he has such an inferiority complex with me sometimes, and I actually feel like I'm the lucky one. I don't think that his insecurities are debilitating or crippling, they are just something we have to address whenever they "flare" up. We all have insecurities (myself included) his are just manifested in this way. Since he is so open and mature about how he feels and doesn't express his insecurities in a self-pitying way, we are able to tackle them. Also, I also share my insecurities with him and so I hope that takes me off this pedestal he puts me up on.

I will admit that the feeling was more intense when having sex with a man with a larger penis. I felt it every time. but sometimes, it could hurt too. With my fiance , there are some times I'm so wet that I have trouble feeling the sensation at all, meaning I can feel the pressure of his penis but I dont feel the friction. Its worth the trade off though, he is very generous (thats why I'm so wet in the first place) and like I said in my previous post, very creative. Also, he prioritizes me , so I am never left unsatisfied. I prefer sex with him. I am worried though that I might have trouble feeling it after I have kids, but we'll cross that bridge when and if we reach it.

[sophia]

I'll ask it - whats his girth?

and unless you had him standing up with a bone pressed dorsal measurement you under- measured him.

He's likely 5 or 5.25.

You may think Im nitpicking, well I of course I am, but it affects his placement in the bell curve.

It probably hurts him terribly about his slipping out and your well endowed exes.

Btu thank you for posting- I have saved the page to re-read

I understand the importance of an accurate measurement in this forum, but I actually think I over measured him. He says he's smaller than that and I was a little hasty with the tape, especially since its forgiving because its not a straight line. he says he's barely over 4. I gave him 4.5 because I think I measured him right before he was going to cum so he was at his 'biggest'. (needless to say that killed the mood, but we started over ). I don't know his girth- i wouldnt say he's big in that way either though. I will find out and get back to you

[sophia]

There are guys here smaller then that (me included) and our options are limited, I've just taken mine off the table.

I really don't see what I can take away from this, But I think this story may help other guys here around that size, and I'm happy for that.

You should try to be more positive because honestly a lot of women don't enjoy sex *that* much because they can't all orgasm from it. girls gab all the time about how some nights they just have sex because they love their husband/boyfriend, and are totally not into it. I enjoy the sensation from penetration but I love a good O way more. I was already very invested in my guy before we ever had sex, the size of his penis didn't change how I already felt about him. maybe try working on the relationship part first? I'm sure this is stuff people have already said and you have probably already heard, but I think that its worth reiterating.

[dvnJ22]

I am worried though that I might have trouble feeling it after I have kids, but we'll cross that bridge when and if we reach it.

If that happens would you leave him or cheat on him?

[dvnJ22]

You should try to be more positive because honestly a lot of women don't enjoy sex *that* much because they can't all orgasm from it. girls gab all the time about how some nights they just have sex because they love their husband/boyfriend, and are totally not into it. I enjoy the sensation from penetration but I love a good O way more. I was already very invested in my guy before we ever had sex, the size of his penis didn't change how I already felt about him. maybe try working on the relationship part first? I'm sure this is stuff people have already said and you have probably already heard, but I think that its worth reiterating.

I don't think that far ahead, I'm surprised I'm still alive, and not in prison/mental ward. I'm not interested in showing myself naked to anyone. Long boring story.

[sophia]

I'll ask it - whats his girth?

and unless you had him standing up with a bone pressed dorsal measurement you under- measured him.

He's likely 5 or 5.25.

You may think Im nitpicking, well I of course I am, but it affects his placement in the bell curve.

It probably hurts him terribly about his slipping out and your well endowed exes.

Btu thank you for posting- I have saved the page to re-read

oh, i forgot to mention, when he does slip out he does not miss a beat. he actually kind of taught me how to work around it and still be on top so that he doesn't slip out. I think it really is about confidence, and we've really gotten to a great place where he is so confident in the bedroom and it makes for amazing sex