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THERAPIST's VACATION THREAD


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  • 2 weeks later...

I have this week and next week. I was unable to express why I was feeling the way I did and left session feeling unresolved. I am in an I hate myself mood in the moment. That may change, though, they come and go. I really just don't care, unfortunately, my feelings are betraying me.

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  • 2 weeks later...

My T is gone, and I am officially in the midst of a T Vacation. The last session was a very grounding one. T listened to what I said, and he responded in a way that showed me that he respected what I said to him. I had a really good night the night after session as good things were going on family-wise. That was Thursday, and I still feel grounded. On the way home yesterday, I was afraid because I started to feel the part of me that is in pain, and I sat there wondering if it was going to manifest or just wanted me to know it was there. So far, so good. I haven't done much today in spite of my better mood, but I am okay with that. I am now sitting on my bed listening to the rain fall on the roof, and it is thundering a little which is very calming to me. So far, so good. I have 32 days to go, not that I am counting or anything.

2 764 800 000 milliseconds

= 768 hours

= 32 days

= 4.5 weeks

= 1.0521 months

= 1.0836 months(synodic)

= 0.0877 years

= 0.0876 years(calendar)

Hey, it isn't four weeks, it is four and a half.

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Have you tried sitting with your pain at all when it comes up, Tsunami? I find it really helps me to not fight emotional pain in an agitated way, but rather lean into it, listen to it, and then let it go.

Do you have anything of t to hold in your hand? I find this helps me. Maybe it also helps to find ways to comfort yourself and know it is okay to do that.

I am here and listening.

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And it's just .087 of a year! That's like 9 cents on the dollar. You can do it. :-)

But part of being able to do it would be to allow the one who's in pain to speak too. Can she be more specific about her needs than just that she needs the therapist back? What does he bring back, and is there any other way to get that, or at least to soothe not getting that, while he's away?

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Have you tried sitting with your pain at all when it comes up, Tsunami? I find it really helps me to not fight emotional pain in an agitated way, but rather lean into it, listen to it, and then let it go.

Do you have anything of t to hold in your hand? I find this helps me. Maybe it also helps to find ways to comfort yourself and know it is okay to do that.

I am here and listening.

You make a good point. I usually feel the pain and then get fearful and start to fight it. I have started thinking about just being mindful when this part of me comes up, or when I am ruminating myself into a bad mood, and it helps when I can do that. I felt it again tonight, but not full swing. I know it is only day three (almost four), but even though I have felt that part of me a little, I haven't felt compelled to contact my T. The scary part is that I can't predict what will happen, if I will stay grounded, or if I will be consumed with terror and emotions. Thanks for listening and reminding me to be mindful. It is surprising how difficult it is to remember this when I am in pain. Take care!

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And it's just .087 of a year! That's like 9 cents on the dollar. You can do it. :-)

But part of being able to do it would be to allow the one who's in pain to speak too. Can she be more specific about her needs than just that she needs the therapist back? What does he bring back, and is there any other way to get that, or at least to soothe not getting that, while he's away?

LOLOL! I like your point of view:)

I know that when I feel that part of me that I feel terrified and am overwhelmed with emotion, so I think I am compelled to contact T because he is a safe base. T soothes this part I guess. I think it would help if I stopped disowning it, so I have work to do. I don't really know how all of this will pan out, but I hope I make progress:) Thanks!

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Tsu, I'm pleased to hear that you're doing so well so far! :) And I like your counting! :D

I suppose it's gonna be hard sometimes, but I'm also sure you can do it ;). The farewell and the start were very good and that's important.

We're here with you...

Thanks, Lala:) So far, I'm o.k. I like the counting, also. Instead of using a calculator, though, I cheated and used a website that converts time:) I appreciate everyone being here, and I do suppose it will be difficult at some point. I suspect as it gets closer to the end, that I will get more anxious, at least that was my pattern with my last therapist. I don't feel attached to him nor do I feel detached from him right now, I feel grounded, and it isn't centered around him. I know that can change, though, without warning. I have no clue. Take care:)

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Remember this good, calm feeling so you can come back to it in the days to come. :)

I wish I could:) When I have different parts, or ego states, or feeling states, emerge, I usually have an intellectual memory but I usually can't access an emotional memory. I am not sure if that makes sense? I think it is a good idea, and I will try to be mindful. I am kind of embarrassed right now, because I feel like I am making a big deal about nothing, because the state I am in is grounded. I am me. But I know that other states will bring other emotions. I guess I am really living in the moment:) Thanks Luna!:)

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  • 2 weeks later...

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