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What am I?


Daegan

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I noticed you said you were raised by an older generation whom are also likelier less savvy with this new age techno generation you are part of. Not that such a thing ought to cause issues, but I wonder what factor the lack of a relevant role model has played in your view of the life ahead of you?

Yes you have role models, but how relevant are they to you and the potential for your life? Maybe this is where fear or anger lies? The natural human instincts to anxiety. Seems your brain is prone to the fight response to your own anxieties and looks for a target due this pent up cycling inside of you. Other's might be more prone to the flight response and withdraw and become depressed?

In fact my guess is most people who experience anxiety as an ongoing have both but in different measure. Hence timidity or aggression in varying ratios.

So , the solution to your plight would seem to me to be role model seeking, or some way ahead that changes things that might get you there. Maybe a career that broadens your horizons?? Something to latch onto as a plan to be somebody else in 10 years? Focus.

These emotions and energy behind them need a leader in you to take them someplace. That plan.

Also don't be defeated at derails or odd distractions that interfere with this. Try and keep some constants for you - ones to the place you aim to get.

That role model thing is tough though. Like you need answers and all you have is unknowing with not a place to get it from.

What kind of careers have you considered?

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I suppose you could always do that and see where it leads. Do you resent the mainstream career paths and opportunities available to you? Is there something about following the authority and routines of careers that subdues how you feel?

I was thinking your idea might get you someplace or not, since it seems to be about randomly hitting on life. In some ways that is a possible way to explore the world. But what then? Are you hoping it will lead someplace and just trust to luck? Are you looking forward to doing that?

I suppose what I'm interested in - about you - is whether you feel you are cutting your options due being trapped by your own aggression, when if you could control or direct it, maybe other options would be on your list and relieve some of the pressure to just run and see where you get to?

It's about how to keep your options alive so you don't feel cornered by life. How to lose or rodeo the feelings that keep you out of the saddle of your own life. Then maybe you can ride out someplace?

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How are you doing with your anger, Daegan?

This may not fit you at all, but I can remember a long phase when anger was keeping me sane, giving me clarity in a very confusing part of my life. I was later able to let go of it, but I can still remember how it was.

Oh and I keep trying to think of a question that you'd have to answer with "No, Way." :D

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I have to ask about your anger and what you and your friends focus on in your time with each other? What interests you? You seem to find the world at a disadvantage to yourself. Have you considered going on a mental journey as well as a physical one? I am talking about meditation and thought. It helps me with my anger, although I still think most people are idiots. The things people let others do to them is just unheard of and it makes me think they are drones. If you have a decision about another human being before you know them, you have to have a basis to that particular feeling, you have to think of them sub consciously as bad, so where does that come from?

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  • 2 weeks later...

Well I will knock out a few questions, my anger is still there it has just died back down to the coals now that the school year is stupid and I don't have to listen to idiotic speech.

My interests are well, depends on the mood Top, it can range from reading to taking apart an old laptop to make a spearhead. I do indeed automatically associate negative connotations towards people I see and do not know, and have no idea where it stems from.

I await your question Way, make it a good one ;)

I am going back to my counselor in a week or so, and am debating whether to play mind games or not

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Oh! And that girl I was trying to date it lasted 2 days before she was like 'it's too awkward we're like brother and sister' I am not related to her whatsoever (I thought I should clarify that, I don't have a sister), anyways I have no qualms I was only dating her so she would have a nice guy for once instead of her usual Dickhead (pardon my cussing it is the most accurate description out there) boyfriends, her loss I guess,although it would be nice to have someone to take the loneliness away

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Doesn't her friendship (as opposed to her dating-ship) still take some of the loneliness away?

You can still be her friend, and maybe protect her a little from richardheads. Or at least help her when she finds out that they are ...

I'm curious what purpose there would be in playing mind games with a therapist. {I did it myself, with the therapist that my parents forced on me, when I was eighteen. Trust me: neither of us profited.} But it was only a few years later that I went into therapy on my own, when I found that I wasn't doing any better on my own. Is it that this therapist isn't the right one for you, or that you aren't interested in therapy right now (or some other reason)?

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Indeed, but I have this void for lack of a better term in my life

I have tried helping her, she doesn't use it

I want to play mind game 'cus it sounds like fun, I would like therapy but not this one, I feel as though since it is Christian based she's going to try to shove that on me, I need a different place to go to

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I briefly enjoyed the mind games I played with my first one; I had a lot of resentment at being forced into it. But it got old quickly. No one could make me do or say anything I didn't want to, and that wasn't that difficult to prove. {And of course, I'm sure I didn't need to prove it to the guy my folks sent me to; I'm sure he already knew it.}

The harder question to answer is what do you want to do and/or say? Is a different therapy possible? Is it possible to take what this person says, whatever its bias, and still use it to help yourself? Christianity, or any other religion, doesn't necessarily prevent mental health. It's all in what you do with it ...

And I do understand wanting someone special to be with, and feeling lonely without. I was just saying that real friends can be a comfort in between, that's all.

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I probably won't play mind games and about the Christianity thing, I'm a Buddhist and at school it was almost constantly people trying to convert me, I live in the Bible Belt, and frankly I'm tired of it.

I have a group of friends that help take the edge off but the loneliness is still there.

I'm like a brother to this girl and she's like my sister, I just wanted her know that there good men out there she could date, instead of these richardheads (I absolutely love that and wonder if I can use from now on)

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I've always wondered where the Bible Pants are ... ;-)

I don't copyright my material, Daeg; you're welcome to it.

One of the hardest things about caring for someone and trying to help them is that you can't make them accept it. She'll have to learn her own lessons, I'm afraid. But I bet she appreciates you being there for her.

Religion is a difficult subject. If only because maybe they're all "right", in a way ... I doubt that anyone's going to get the Universe to fit exclusively into their set of words. It wouldn't be a very big Universe if it could.

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Hahaaha, right you are Mal, and I told her that she needs to start learning lessons on her own

I agree with the religion talk as well, I just quickly change the subject or get them to squabble amongst themselves for my amusement

The dictionary this website uses for spell check doesn't count amongst as a word what has the literary world become!!!??

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