Very small and very sad

[Perseverance]

Once I get past my emotions on this subject and focus on what matters I see a lot clearer. I'm draining myself on what usually takes up .003% of my time throughout the week. Which equates to 30 minutes assuming I have sex twice a week. There's so much more important shit.

Here's a breakdown of what I feel is contributing to my so far successful relationship.

1. Work. Soon I'll be making over 60k in my twenties. Not a lot but I'm driven to better myself and to ensure a good quality of life with my parter. I set goals and I expect to meet them.

2. I'm down for anything. I don't say no to much wether it's movies, concerts, types of food to eat. I like trying new things. I'm spontaneous. I say let's take a day trip here or there. I try my best not to be a boring fuck.

3. Other than my penis size. I don't take much serious. I try to be generous when I can wether its charity or being a good tipper.

4. I acknowledge my flaws and I make note to change what I can. Recentl, listening.

5. I try to be as thoughtful as I can be. I remember little things and I try to show my parter that over time. I think it counts in being a good boyfriend.

6. I tend to make people laugh. But that comes with not taking much serious. Other than my sexual performance.

Just off the top of my head I though of a few things that I can see that make me worth being with. Does my 4.5 dick take all of that away. If I was 3.5 would it not matter? Do people not connect and create bonds with each other? It's alllll about the dick? I am so confused.

Whenever I try and make sense of this on here soon to follow is a wave of "no no no you must feel like shit!" And guess what? I usually do.

Very nice to know this relationship i have would be non existent if my dick was 3.5 inches. One inch is all that is holding my gf back from leaving me.

If your on here, miserable, guess what? What you are doing is not working. Try something different. If you're scared to well then that's your fault.

If you don't want to just quit. Stop posting on here and get on with whatever the hell you want to do.

I have a small penis and no one will ever love me is a bullshit line. Stop bullshitting yourself and everyone else on this site. The odds are not in your favor no shit. Your attitudes are doing you no good.

Take your pick. Make it work or give up. Those are your options.

Now come on. Let it rain down on me. Hopefully by tonight I'll have read a post and I'll be in the bathroom slitting my wrists because life apparently isn't worth living. Jesus fucking Christ.

[u.r.what.u.is]

Perseverance, you are taking things like a man...I think it's helpful to read. You have a small penis, and you are as much a man as any guy with a horse dong is. Hell yeah!!

That's the thing...we are all men, no less than anyone else is. It takes a lot of work and healing to come to this realization, though.

[Perseverance]

Exactly my point u.r... You think I'm happy with my penis? No, I absolutely despise it and I resent my parents for it. That will never change. But acting like a man is the only route to go. Not like a child even though I posses a child's penis. I don't have all the answers but what I do know is I don't have to be miserable my whole life. I've been told countless times by partners to "get over it" it wasn't a deal breaker to them. I don't even know what that amounts to. I just get frustrated. How can I just get over it. Eventually they leave me for acting like a child about it. No one likes a complaining asshole mope.

So I'm here at this stage. Which some of you will have to put in the hard work to get to as well.

You're going to get laughed at.

Women won't call you back.

People will eventually find out your dick is small.

You'll battle depression.

But eventually you'll find a girl that will be willing to spend her time/life with you.

There's too many women on this planet to feel hopeless. Leave your town or country if it's a toxic culture. That's obviously the case in America and in England for the most part.

I just wish people would cut the shit. We GET IT. We got dealt a bad hand. So incredibly frustrated today. Honestly this is like being a homosexual. You're never going to feel right until you come out about it. Flowers don't blossom when they're kept inside a prison. There. Wrote some poetry for you guys.

[Wastedlife]

Exactly my point u.r... You think I'm happy with my penis? No, I absolutely despise it and I resent my parents for it. That will never change. But acting like a man is the only route to go. Not like a child even though I posses a child's penis. I don't have all the answers but what I do know is I don't have to be miserable my whole life. I've been told countless times by partners to "get over it" it wasn't a deal breaker to them. I don't even know what that amounts to. I just get frustrated. How can I just get over it. Eventually they leave me for acting like a child about it. No one likes a complaining asshole mope.

So I'm here at this stage. Which some of you will have to put in the hard work to get to as well.

You're going to get laughed at.

Women won't call you back.

People will eventually find out your dick is small.

You'll battle depression.

But eventually you'll find a girl that will be willing to spend her time/life with you.

There's too many women on this planet to feel hopeless. Leave your town or country if it's a toxic culture. That's obviously the case in America and in England for the most part.

I just wish people would cut the shit. We GET IT. We got dealt a bad hand. So incredibly frustrated today. Honestly this is like being a homosexual. You're never going to feel right until you come out about it. Flowers don't blossom when they're kept inside a prison. There. Wrote some poetry for you guys.

You are full of all this grate advice and from your post your life seams to be perfect (making good money, perfect girl)...yet you seam to spend a lot of time on this board and what you call ”toxic” environment. Why is that? Could it be something that I always said that no matter what you have or achieved you will never be truly happy because of those missing few inches? That's the whole point dude, there will always be a empty space and feeling of inadequacy that will never go away....

[Perseverance]

You are full of all this grate advice and from your post your life seams to be perfect (making good money, perfect girl)...yet you seam to spend a lot of time on this board and what you call ”toxic” environment. Why is that? Could it be something that I always said that no matter what you have or achieved you will never be truly happy because of those missing few inches? That's the whole point dude, there will always be a empty space and feeling of inadequacy that will never go away....

Who's life is perfect? Gimme a break no ones is. Mine is far from perfect. I recognize I have a mental issue and it feeds off of this insecurity. I obsess over a lot of things and it's unhealthy. I'm sure some of you guys fit into that catagory as well. My attitude is the deciding factor here, in fact it's always been.

I know I can truly be happy. I don't have much but what I do have, nice car, wonderful gf, a job, my health it's actually not so bad. I'm an emotional guy, super passionate so issues in general sometimes drive me over the edge. I'm playing against what could be and yeah it sucks.

Why am I here? Venting helps sometimes. Learning from other people, "supporting" each other. I like to help, hopefully I do that somewhat.

Honestly, I don't think I'm very smart when it comes to writing. Half the time I feel like I'm rambling.

Maybe I should calm down. I'm totally aggravated today with more than just this. If it means anything I want to tell you guys I want try and help out however I can. What is it that we want? A girl to have sex with? A partner? Both are achievable even if it means you have to walk through hell on broken glass to obtain it. Blah blah blah. That's what I think I sound like.

[Wastedlife]

What is it that we want? A girl to have sex with? A partner?

I want to see women's eyes glaze over when I pull out my 8 inch penis. And when I start to penetrate her I can see the pleasure on her eyes as she's having difficult time taking it all in but she wants it so bad, it hurts a bit at start as I ease in gently but when she gets used it to she's in 7th haven and cant get enough (and calls me big daddy, this is optional))...I cant have what I want.

[malign]

Isn't that the perfect illustration of the problem, though?

It wouldn't be enough for her eyes to glaze over, or for the pleasure to be visible in her eyes, or for her to not be able to get enough.

It has to be because of its size. Nothing else will do.

[u.r.what.u.is]

While I would like to offer help in the same vein as Perseverance's, I feel that my size (5") disqualifies me from really telling guys with smaller equipment how to feel or what to do. Are there guys here with 5" or more who feel ashamed? I assume so because I was for decades but no longer am. I'd be willing to chat via PM to anyone who cares to write. Not to hijack this thread...

[u.r.what.u.is]

Wirelan, my girlfriend is a tall woman who's done it all... The exact kind of woman I once steered clear of, even theoretically. She might not glaze over, but she loves my stuff, and the feeling of me inside her makes her look into my eyes and tell me that she loves me. I no longer feel the need to be one millimeter bigger.

[Jeep]

.

[IrmaJean]

Thanks.

I like to shine as myself. :-) It's a new thing I've learned to do over the past few years. It feels very freeing and it does really seem to affect how others respond to you too.

(I just found your replies too and responded. There are new things to learn all the time about the new forum...for me too. )

WL, if you find a caring woman who appreciates you as a person, she may do all of that because she wants to be with you. Wouldn't you rather she want to be with you and not just with your penis?

[Perseverance]

Wirelan, my girlfriend is a tall woman who's done it all... The exact kind of woman I once steered clear of, even theoretically. She might not glaze over, but she loves my stuff, and the feeling of me inside her makes her look into my eyes and tell me that she loves me. I no longer feel the need to be one millimeter bigger.

Kinda feel the same. I get that look that my gf loves me. She might not be clawing my back but she keeps coming back. I really would like her to open up about toys but I kind of think she won't. Not sure if she even wants to.

And really... Kind of nice knowing she doesn't really care if I go down on her or not. Kinda like "let's get right to it" unlike my past partners. It's like they "needed" it.

[Wastedlife]

Isn't that the perfect illustration of the problem, though?

It wouldn't be enough for her eyes to glaze over, or for the pleasure to be visible in her eyes, or for her to not be able to get enough.

It has to be because of its size. Nothing else will do.

Its about what big penis can give you, like knowing that if a women is interested in you then she will want you even more when you drop your pants. As opposed to seeing her disillusioned face when she sees and 10 year old boys penis on full grown man. Its about having the confidence to talk with any women or man and being able to handle any situation...if you are denying that benefits of large penis extend far beyond just satisfying a women for males (or in your case I don’t know if you believe there are any benefits at all...) then I think we will never agree on this issue.

[malign]

That's okay. I know and like many people I don't agree with. :-)

"Any benefits" is pretty difficult. For instance, I'm fairly short, so when I was younger I sometimes wished I was taller. I thought that being taller would have all the benefits, like being able to see over crowds or reach stuff on high shelves. And of course, it does have those benefits. But then I had occasion to be crawling under desks a lot (installing computers), and I realized there are benefits to being short, too.

I know you'll say it's not the same, and of course it isn't the same. Nothing's ever the same. But it could be relevant anyway.

So, first of all, do the benefits of having a large penis extend to, say, interactions between males? I guess they might, but not in any direct way. Any conflict in life that gets resolved by both guys whipping it out and measuring seems a bit far-fetched. So any effect is indirect; something would have to be different about the psychology of the two men. If one of them believed that his small size made him less able to hold his own in the conflict, made him less confident in other words, then maybe size would have affected the outcome. But belief is psychological, and that means changeable ...

Similar arguments work for interactions between male and female, as long as sex is not the expected outcome for either. Hopefully, for most of us in most situations, we're not going to end up in bed with the women we interact with. Sexual encounters, I agree, will need a different kind of adjustment, but I'm not sure if they're relevant to everyday interactions.

So, could there even be a benefit of having to overcome being small? Well, it might teach you to look beyond the surface to what's really important in a person. A guy's penis handles a remarkably limited number of the situations he's put into; he handles the rest.

[Wutty3]

Why are men with big penises happier than men with small ones..Why is there such a thing as small penis syndrome and not large penis syndrome? Why would more women participate at a website dedicated to men with large penises than one that is dedicated to men with small ones? Why is having a small penis a bad thing and having a big one is a good thing? Why is average now the "new small"? Having a large penis may not equate to happiness but it sure as hell goes a long way towards it in today's culture and society. Just look around you.

[malign]

"Society" also wants rail-thin women and for us all to spend as much money on junk as possible.

It's possible not to go along with that and still be happy.

[Wutty3]

Why are men with big penises happier than men with small ones..Why is there such a thing as small penis syndrome and not large penis syndrome? Why would more women participate at a website dedicated to men with large penises than one that is dedicated to men with small ones? Why is having a small penis a bad thing and having a big one is a good thing? Why is average now the "new small"? Having a large penis may not equate to happiness but it sure as hell goes a long way towards it in today's culture and society. Just look around you.

I'm sorry but after this last go 'round I'm in a rather black mood today...I give up. Who needs love and companionship anyway...I have my cat and my right hand. At least they don't cheat or complain.

[malign]

Just don't get them mixed up ... ;-)

Listen, everybody has times when they get down, and it's hard to believe in ourselves in those times. But they do pass.

[Wutty3]

Nah...I'm tired of "it passing" It's "been passing" ever since I was a kid. Just waiting for the next "thing to pass" Nah....I'm done....perhaps being the creepy old dude at the end of the cul de sac that lives alone, never talks to anyone, or gets out of the house is my destiny. I often times wish my parents would have never met and brought me into this shithole world.

[malign]

Well, I didn't exactly say to "wait" for the bad times to pass. This is a mental health site, after all: there are positive steps you can take to help them to pass, such as trying to adjust your approach to the shithole so that, among other things, you don't take it so personally.

I know it sounds unlikely, but I also remember how it felt to me when I first came here, suicidal myself.

[Perseverance]

"Society" also wants rail-thin women and for us all to spend as much money on junk as possible.

It's possible not to go along with that and still be happy.

The media has conned people and twisted their brains. For example I personally do not find rail-thin women attractive, I mean they can be but I don't seek them out. I like it when a women has a little weight. I'm not talking actually fat but ya know... A little fun weight. Although hot, I do not fantasize about Victoria secret models. It is not reality and it doesn't turn me on like the 45 year old mom does at the grocery store. I saw "We're the Millers" With Jennifer Aniston in it where she does an underwear strip tease and I'm like... Not turned on at all. I don't not find that woman attractive, because at this point I've noticed Katherine Hann is in the movie and I'd rather see her in her underwear, that woman I find very very attractive. My gf probably would think I was full of shit with that statement. Anyways I don't spend my time focusing on other women but I do notice pretty women. Everyone has different tastes. Sometimes my friends don't agree with my taste in women and I tell them the same right back.

Point is society obviously tells me one thing about women and odds are I normally disagree. Yet women buy into that shit.

There's no doubt in my mind society today is sick. On so many levels, not just this. People are dumb and are easily manipulated. I'm just really not buying what they're selling.

I bet some people wouldn't find my gf attractive, some would. I think she's the most beautiful woman I've ever seen.

I say this all the time. I feel this way... Why can't women feel the same.

[u.r.what.u.is]

The 45-year-old "Mom next door" is exactly whom I find most attractive, thus I am constantly being attracted...especially because I have no problem with some extra pounds and I can really dig women from anywhere in the world. The attitude transformation I have experienced recently has made it a LOT easier to be at peace seeing all these women, even though I have no intentions with them. Simply having the confidence that they would most likely still find me attractive with my clothes off is fantastic. And believe me, my stuff is rather modest, especially in the flaccid state. Maybe I'd struggle more if I had been rejected over penis size, but it hasn't happened yet, thankfully.

[Perseverance]

The 45-year-old "Mom next door" is exactly whom I find most attractive, thus I am constantly being attracted...especially because I have no problem with some extra pounds and I can really dig women from anywhere in the world. The attitude transformation I have experienced recently has made it a LOT easier to be at peace seeing all these women, even though I have no intentions with them. Simply having the confidence that they would most likely still find me attractive with my clothes off is fantastic. And believe me, my stuff is rather modest, especially in the flaccid state. Maybe I'd struggle more if I had been rejected over penis size, but it hasn't happened yet, thankfully.

And if you do get rejected it can't discount all the other times you didn't. I'm not sure what your situation is but i hope nothing is holding you back from getting what you want.

[u.r.what.u.is]

And if you do get rejected it can't discount all the other times you didn't. I'm not sure what your situation is but i hope nothing is holding you back from getting what you want.

At this point, finally, I can say that nothing is holding me back. I think a full mental cure has happened to me, in stages, over the years...and the year 2013 completely broke the back of this demon. I no longer feel jealous of, or intimidated by, the guys who carry the big bulge in their trousers. I no longer shy away from women or feel that I am inadequate for any of them. My sex life is fantastic now. My only regrets: 1.) That this didn't happen sooner, and 2.) That I relied on so much pornography (i.e. fake bullshit) over the years. Yes, this could have happened with or without SPS. But I think porn has made fully enjoying the REAL sex a little tougher...as my mind often wants to wander in sex. I guess that's a whole other topic.

[Perseverance]

You can say that again in regards to the porn thing. I enjoy porn a lot. I would love to enjoy it with my gf and actually feel comfortable in my own skin. I understand porn isn't helping at all but I really want to be able to fully let go because porn is very entertaining. If I could actually act out my fantasies with my gf I would stop watching but as it stands I'm not doing half of the disgusting shit I like. Lol prob cause it's not normal.