Job fears

[Victimorthecrime]

Another thing that screwed me up was the concept of morality as it was taught to us in Catholic school.  

The problem w using morality as your compass is that it is anyone's guess what the moral thing to do is in any given situation.  For example it is commonly believed that helping someone is the moral thing to do. But is it?  If I help him am I robbing him of his independence? Am I cheating him out of a valuable life lesson?  How do I know what 'helping' really is?  Am I helping him out of a true desire to help or out of a desire to turn my head from my own problems?

Morality turns into an endless conversation with one's own shoes. 

[Small]

I faced this exact problem at university. I was so held up in helping others that I lacked the killer instinct in doing everything I could to get good grades. In a way,  it diluted my drive to study by allocating vital cognitive and subconscious components to others when it should have been my work. Learned a very tough lesson from this.

[IrmaJean]

That could go both ways, I think. True, that helping others could be a means of avoiding one's own problems, but it might also help a person get outside of their own head for a while and connect with different attributes they have. I think it's good to ask ourselves questions such as what is help and what is enabling? Balance can be tricky at times and maintaining good awareness can be helpful, I think.

I was brought up with a religion that I found didn't always match well with my personal beliefs so I unfollowed it...

I think it's sound advice to try not to allow feelings to cloud judgment (still working on that one myself at times) or stop us from moving forward with our goals.

How are things for you, Vic? Is work going okay?

[Small]

I don't necessarily subscribe to the "balance" theory. Woven into it, is the unspoken assumption that all categories need either an equal or fair prevalence in a persons choices. I agree with what Victim once said, to figure out what you're good at and devote yourself to it.

[IrmaJean]

I think about balance a lot. I don't think so much as a way to make choices, but rather as a guide to help keep myself centered and grounded. (I'm actually working on a balance themed painting right now, even though my daughter is the brains behind my work...)

In this particular instance, though, I would want to offer someone support, but not to the point of creating a dependence. I agree about giving power to one's strengths. I think that is wise advice.

 

[Klingsor]

So how's work going, Victim? Hope the Boardroom Bitches haven't been giving you too hard a time. 

[Victimorthecrime]

I am still hanging in there and things have gotten better than when I first started this thread.  But I can never fully relax because only the lord knows what genius idea they'll come up w next.  

This economy sucks the big one. Worst recovery in our history and worst labor participation rate since WWII.  Dell just announced 3,000 layoffs.  

How are things w you Pax?  I hope good.  Don't worry about going off topic if you choose to respond.  

[Klingsor]

I'm doing ok, thanks. I'm in school and just trying to keep my head above water. I consider myself very fortunate to have this opportunity.

I hear you on the economy. I worry a lot about the future in general. Regardless of the November election, I think this country is headed for hell and probably bloodshed. I hope I'm wrong. 

But...I'm just a minnow in an ocean. I try not to worry about it and just focus on my school. I'm glad things have gotten better at your work!

[Victimorthecrime]

Awesome about the schooling. Do it, do it, do it.  

100 percent agreement on your other 2 points.  

[Victimorthecrime]

I knew this would happen: all the stress I am under finally led to me catching a head cold.  It just started so let's hope it is mild.  

My employer has decided to transfer me out of the department I am in to another one that is horrible.  The reason they have to transfer is that is the only way they get people to work there.  If they posted it, no one would apply.  It will be all of 2017 before I could transfer out.  

I am researching how to go out on a mental health workmans comp leave.  Hopefully that won't be necessary but it might.  

My mind has been usurped by this thing.  It is all I can think about.  Doing my best to not have it this way, telling myself that it's just a job and there could be worse news in life.  That stuff works for a minute then I go right back to being worried and scarred.  I am not giving up; just trying to find a solution, a way to be less miserable.  

[IrmaJean]

Do you have any choice in this or are they telling you that you have to transfer? Can they do that?

Are you able to address your fears in this? Maybe some self nurturing activities could take your mind off it for a time, release some stress? I'm not sure what works best for you.

I hope you feel better soon, both physically and emotionally.

[Klingsor]

I'm truly sorry to hear that, Victim. Is the department into which you are transferring horrible because of the people you must work with/under or because of the nature of the work? 

You are a better man than me. I would likely give up and walk away, putting myself into an even bigger mess. That seems to be my pattern.

If I were you, I'd most definitely try to get the workman's comp. It's something I never considered in the past, but these days I would. I will be hoping for a solution to present itself to you. 

[jazz]

Vic, not surprising you feel unwell. Hope you can complain to HR about the proposed transfer. Get well soon.

[Victimorthecrime]

Thanks for the comments folks.  

Irma - yes they can do it. Corporations can do pretty much anything they want.  

Pax - it's bad because of the people.  There are a couple folks there that are flat out sociopaths.  

Jazz - oh yeah I am preparing my HR statement. The question is will it do any good.  

There is one small ray of sunshine: a supervisor of another department was walking by my desk and I had about a 10 second conversation w her where she said her department will have openings in January and that I have "the skill set". I am not opening any champaign yet because I don't know her well enough to gage the sincerity.  The company I work for takes dissimulation to new heights. But, that said, I do feel a little better.  

It is 16 degrees here and going down to 4 tonight.  

[IrmaJean]

I hope the HR report does help because no one should be forced to work in a hostile environment.

It's good that you can see some light. I hope the offer proves to be genuine.

It's bitter cold here as well. Our current temperature is zero degrees Fahrenheit (-17.8 Celsius). 

[Victimorthecrime]

Quick update. Ever see those movies where the condemned man is strapped into the electric chair when the phone rings and it's the governor calling?   Well that's what happened here to me. Two days before Christmas a senior executive at my company made the decision to leave things be as they are.  That's the good news.  The bad news is they could decide anything again come the end of 2017.  But for now I am ok.   

[IrmaJean]

I'm glad the changes you didn't want haven't happened as of yet...possibly they won't? I hope things continue to be okay.

[Victimorthecrime]

The company i work for is involved in a large merger and they are saying that since the other company is in a different market segment there should be mininal impact on the workforce but I am highly skeptical because there already have been layoffs and rumors of more on the way.  If I could do over again I would do anything, literally anything, then work for a corporation.  

[YOTH]

I hope it pans out in your favour victim. Sounds like one of those situations that had you on the edge of your seat figuratively and literally. It's difficult because all signs are telling someone in that situation to make the company realise you're in disposable, but that can backfire as it makes you visible to the people making the decisions. Fucking nightmare. What do you do if you don't mind me asking? I'm sure you've mentioned it I just can't be arsed looking for the comment lol. 

[LostBoy]

Hi @Victimorthecrime,

I've been through many corporate changes in my career. I have been in businesses the were being divested, I was in a plant that was shut down, my business has been acquired, we have added headcount and laid off people as well. It all sucks because as humans none of us really like change. Unfortunately, change is inevitable whether you are working for a corporation, work for a small business, or you own your own business. You will eventually either change or you will die.

I have been fortunate enough to not only survive through all of these changes but to thrive during most of them so I will offer my opinion on the topic and maybe there will be something that you can take away from it that will be helpful.

I have found that the best way to survive major changes is to embrace them, support them, and be a change agent for those who are implementing them. It is easy for us to become jaded and just say "to hell with it". I have seen many good people lose their jobs due to an unwillingness to embrace the changes. While I have not always agreed to the changes taking place, I went into them with an open mind and a willingness to learn and adapt to whatever was needed of me during the transformation. While some people may consider this "rolling over" I see it as making myself an asset to the corporation and not a liability. Most companies, especially during major changes, do not like liabilities.

Another thing to consider is that a corporation is not a single person or an entity in and of itself. A corporation is made up of people, just like us, from the top to the bottom. There are humans all along the chain and they are imperfect creatures who are all just doing their best to succeed in whatever they are doing. If something bad does happen, ensure that you are marketable, have an updated resume, make sure you have skills that can be utilized outside of your current organization, and work to continuously improve yourself.

In the end I always fall back to this quote:

"God give me the strength to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

I know, it's a little ironic considering I suffer from SPS and I cannot follow this quote related to that issue.

Anyway, I do wish the best for you in your situation. I personally know how stressful it can be and how painful it is to have to deal with the "unknown" for extended periods of time. If I can offer any assistance please let me know.

[Victimorthecrime]

@lostboy1 thanks for weighing in. I value your (and everyone's) opinion.  

I used to feel exactly how you feel. Sadly I think that thanks to so called free trade, globalism, computer technology, and idiotic government policy we live in a time where the last thing that matters is the working law-abiding tax paying citizen.  People can't eat jargon they can only eat food and I feel we are not far from violent revolution in this country.  I don't want it; I just think that is where all signs are pointed that we are headed.  

But your points are solid - we can only do what we can do and it is important we do that.  

I was laid off once from this place and managed to find another job internally.  That could feasibly happen again.  If it doesn't and I get cut loose I will get about 6 months of salary as severence and could then collect unemployment for 6 months.  I do own my own home and have some money in the bank.  I also have a FICO score of 800.  My plan would be to complete a medical billing course that I started some time ago and look for a job involving that.  If I really had to I could even get by on as little as $10/hr for a couple years. It wouldn't be pretty but it could be done.  That is just rock bottom worst case scenario.  

So basically I know in my heart I should worry less but like you said w the SPS some things are easier said than done.  

 

[IrmaJean]

I think it's a good idea to have a plan in place for all of the potential outcomes, though sometimes life does throw us curveballs. My family has been going through some major work changes recently after decades of security. It isn't easy and we're still adjusting, but I try to take lostboy1's approach...embrace the change. So challenging at times. I hope things work out okay, Vic.

[Klingsor]

On December 9, 2017 at 8:55 AM, Victimorthecrime said:

 

Feeling a bit melancholy mostly due to FB and you tube seeing people traveling, enjoying nature, concerts, friends etc. Also I see these guys deploying skills that I don't have w technology and handyman skills that I never developed.  There's this guy that lives in his solar powered van that he built himself and makes money on line and travels etc and it makes me both jealous and feel like an idiot by comparison.  He's not some pathetic wage earner worried about getting laid off.  

I can identify with all of this and what you said about corporations. I missed the Bitcoin crypto bandwagon too so there's another reason to die. Did your working class Irish Catholic background influence your decisions? My value system was shaped by Depression era old folks, by which I was told to make good grades and go to college and maximize your slave wages and negotiate for a better benefits package to pay for the medical adventures of post-retirement. Meanwhile guys I went to high school with who were fuck ups, clowns, and plain didn't give a shit are making six figures with their own construction businesses, self employment, catering, etc. The more I consider it the more my entire family is so goddamn risk averse to anything that they would rather work 40 years for peanuts and "benefits" rather than risk 10k starting a business or something. Or maybe they're just all stupid. It's prob a combination. 

 

[Victimorthecrime]

On 12/11/2017 at 8:28 AM, Klingsor said:

I went to high school with who were fuck ups, clowns, and plain didn't give a shit are making six figures

This reminds me of what I used to say about how "biology is destiny".  By "biology" I don't just mean a person's physiology but also his family.  So many guys were drunken fuck-ups some even w legal issues later had their ass saved by family money or connections.  

I read somewhere recently a quote along the lines of "life throws you many clues about where things are headed. If people would just learn to listen they could perhaps do something to change their destiny".  Not saying it's the golden rule or anything but worthy of consideration.  I missed a lot of clues earlier in life and I am trying to listen & learn and make adjustments now.  

[Klingsor]

Yeah and there's also mental heredity. My father didn't teach me anything about how to be a man. He was/is a violently insecure loser as well. These are little things which play just as much role as overt biology in shaping self-confidence. If you're incubated in failure and dysfunction it's difficult to summon the confidence or the jovial indifference of a silver spoon necessary to succeed at life.