Resolute Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 Can we be our own therapists?sometimes. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Victimorthecrime Posted September 30, 2014 Report Share Posted September 30, 2014 I am not sure we have any choice! A good therapist just unlocks the answer already inside you. mts 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted October 1, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 1, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted October 1, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 1, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malign Posted October 1, 2014 Report Share Posted October 1, 2014 Maybe. We have limits.But also, we can grow, and expand those limits.And the word "control" is a two-edged (at least) sword, because what we may really need is balance. Balance is the result of forces that aren't under direct ego control, which of course scares the ego. But an ego left alone to run things tends to go off the deep end, either towards grandiosity and perfectionism, or towards giving up and hopeless self-abasement.So, back to your question: maybe our uncontrolled reactions aren't as bad as we (some part of us) thinks they are? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Resolute Posted October 1, 2014 Report Share Posted October 1, 2014 Maybe. We have limits.But also, we can grow, and expand those limits.And the word "control" is a two-edged (at least) sword, because what we may really need is balance. Balance is the result of forces that aren't under direct ego control, which of course scares the ego. But an ego left alone to run things tends to go off the deep end, either towards grandiosity and perfectionism, or towards giving up and hopeless self-abasement.So, back to your question: maybe our uncontrolled reactions aren't as bad as we (some part of us) thinks they are?what's this ego business? shouldn't the mind do the "controlling" ? meaning that anything completely uncontrolled (or at least supervised) is bad. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted October 2, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted October 2, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malign Posted October 2, 2014 Report Share Posted October 2, 2014 It's true that a complete lack of control is unbalanced, yes.But so is complete control.To me, it's like the difference between a benevolent parent who watches a child so that they don't hurt themselves, but allows them to try whatever they want other than that, compared to one who just abandons them to do whatever they want or one who manages their every move. Probably the first parent doesn't think of what they do for their child in terms of "control" at all.I'm not an expert, but it seems to me that mania is at least partly organic (from your body, chemical), and might not be controllable by an act of will alone. But the inflation of self that often goes with it ("I'll be able to rule the world" or "I'm the only one who can stop the plot against the government") is a sign of an unregulated ego. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted October 3, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted October 3, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted October 3, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 3, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted October 26, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 26, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted October 26, 2014 Author Report Share Posted October 26, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IrmaJean Posted October 26, 2014 Report Share Posted October 26, 2014 I do the escape thing too sometimes with soft music or a sentimental romance movie. I think it's okay sometimes to give our minds a break from all of the stress. Maybe the company of others helps us to find our own energy? I hope your day gets better, mts. mts 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Victimorthecrime Posted October 26, 2014 Report Share Posted October 26, 2014 Totally agree Irma. I do light exercise, read, watch TV, enjoy food, take a nap, enjoy tea or coffee, you tube, affirmations, and even just go for a ride in the car because I am lucky enough to have satellite radio. Even doing chores & errands can help stress because of the sense of accomplishment. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted November 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted November 19, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted November 19, 2014 Author Report Share Posted November 19, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IrmaJean Posted November 19, 2014 Report Share Posted November 19, 2014 I'm sorry things are so painful and difficult, mts. Are there ways to connect with joy as well or perhaps peaceful feelings? Maybe this helps to balance out some of your painful feelings? Do you enjoy any hobbies or activities?I hope things go okay for you today. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Victimorthecrime Posted November 19, 2014 Report Share Posted November 19, 2014 Me too mts, positive thoughts and good wishes. I hope you can find away to love and accept yourself w/o regard to anyone else's opinion. That is what I have had to do. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted November 20, 2014 Author Report Share Posted November 20, 2014 - Victimorthecrime 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted November 22, 2014 Author Report Share Posted November 22, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IrmaJean Posted November 22, 2014 Report Share Posted November 22, 2014 What don't you understand, mts? I could answer for myself, but that would just be my personal experiences. I think women are all very different from one another. Maybe it helps to get to know the individual? Open expression and acceptance can help, I think. Take care. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted November 22, 2014 Author Report Share Posted November 22, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mts Posted November 22, 2014 Author Report Share Posted November 22, 2014 - Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.