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My so called life


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  • 4 weeks later...

Another Saturday. I'm at my parents house this morning after staying last night, just popped downstairs and had 2 slices of last night's pizza with a cup of tea, and said hello to my mum. Well I sort grumbled it out, we're all in a bad mood because I managed to get into an argument with my sister in law who consequently took her baby and went off to stay with her mum.

 

I sort of expected my brother to rough me up or at least have some stern words of his own for me, and I'm still a little apprehensive about seeing him again today. Yesterday though, he seemed virtually indifferent to his wife and daughter leaving and he acted as normal towards me. Stoic, but polite. Is it a calm before the storm? I will soon find out.

 

When I got here yesterday evening for my sister's birthday party, I saw that her cats were locked away in her bedroom. She still lives with my parents when she's not away for work during the weekdays, so sort of has to live by their book. I fucking love the male cat, silver. We always find time to hang out, and he's a beg for attention lol.

 

My sister in law had stipulated that they must be locked up for the entire duration of the weekend were she to stay over, and my parents hospitably agreed to tickle the itch of her so called phobia. They are so naive. These are family pets, and I figured they ought to be around for their owner's birthday, so I let them out.

 

Anyway, my sister in law threw a fit when she saw, and screamed down at anyone who was unfortunate enough to console her. After I absolutely refused to put them back, she stormed out with her baby while glaring at me with those of big googly eyes. Lol.

 

Anyway, I sort of came upstairs to "my bedroom" following a come to jesus meeting and have been up here ever since. That's why I figured I'd scoff some left over pizza because I'm totally starving, even if that means bumping into my parents. I don't even know why I'm still here to be honest. I should have left last night but my room has all the sky channels open, plus a bathroom. It's like a mini break. Beats the hell out of the shit hole I call home.

 

Anyway yeah it's a shitty morning. I'll probably stay in bed and watch cartoons or something until an hour where leaving isn't considered rude or cowardly. (Says the guy hiding from his family under the sheets). This isn't the first time I've fallen out with my sister in law and come to think of it, the only people that seem to have minded those times were my parents, again. 

 

Anyway, thought I'd check in with you guys. I have 1 actual friend in the real world, so naturally I don't get to talk to many people. I'm pretty sure my mum is making breakfast so I'm going to go see if I can pig out on some before resuming my hiding. Man I should just go home but I want to hang around for my sister. It's her birthday and I want to give her present and catch up. I feel like Kevin McCallister from "Home Alone". Haha. 

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Well that sucks. I wouldn't mind swapping with you on this particular occasion though, because I'm like some comic book villain with no super powers that people disregard out of pity. Like a poor,  pussy batman running around his parent's manor shooting everyone with his finger-gun shouting bang bang while they clutch their chests and fall over to dutifully play into their little retard's fantasy. 

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Is your sister in law afraid of cats or uncomfortable with them being around the baby? I probably would have difficulty locking up pets for an entire weekend too. I keep putting off house repairs because I know the associated noise will upset and frighten our dogs. Pets can be great company.

Are you sure your parents feel this way about keeping a room for you? Is it possible they like having a place for you at home?

I hope your sister had a great birthday.

Take care.

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16 hours ago, IrmaJean said:

 

Her daughter   loves animals. It's just the sis in law that has this grand aversion. It wasn't even the fact that she was upset about being around the cats, she was literally screaming at everyone like they had shot her dog or something. Also claimed that I had deliberately let the cats out to get a desired reaction from her. 

 

In this particular case my brother seems fine with me, I don't know why. Perhaps he saw that his wife overreacted but even then, I was the cause of the commotion on Friday evening. They returned on Sunday, mostly because my sister in laws mum doesn't want her around either, or so I'm led to believe.

 

Beth I am a loser of the first degree. My parents pity me. Their intentions may not be sinister but I doubt my presence is somehow uplifting to them. My family aren't like the contemporary units we see on TV. They respect academia and socioeconomic status which makes me a second class citizen. 

 

I refused postgraduate education and had a complete breakdown. I spent years as a recluse, having to rely heavily on a line credit from my family so I didn't starve or become homeless. Now I'm supposed to go back and demand acknowledgement or appreciation? 

 

Men are just treated differently. If we're not resourceful we're useless. I have fallen short of every expectation put on me and for that I am alone. I have 1 friend, and spend my time withdrawn and isolated. I am pretty sure he looks down on me too but I don't know for certain. 

 

Soon even the young ones will see me for what I am. I remind myself of Rubius Hagrid from harry potter in that I'm never truly seen as an equal. I have given up on acceptance etc so I try staying out the way as much as I can. I've decided not to bring attention to myself when I visit my parents in future. It simply isn't worth it. 

 

I know I'm complaining but it wouldn't make sense for me to come here and talk things up. I'm pretty sure that everyone here knows I struggle with life anyway. Most of them do too, and I commend the stronger folk for posting positivity despite their suffering. Sorry I'm done.

 

 

 

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"Men are just treated differently. If we're not resourceful we're useless. I have fallen short of every expectation put on me and for that I am alone."

Preach brother preach!  In a million generations women will still not get this.  A man is what he can do.  Period.  No one gives 2 flying shits how nice you are, in fact if you are nice it is considered evidence of being a pussy. 

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I would agree with you, VOTC; that's been my experience, too.

Men claim to value niceness; but they hire alpha males for their businesses and they vote for (OK, i won't say his name, i'll just call him Well-Known Ignorant Egotist).

Women claim to value niceness; but most of them date alpha males.  Nice men -- they get a pat on the head and that "I like you as a friend" brush-off.

We all need to value niceness more; more than wealth, more than beauty, more than Coolness, more than strength in sports or battle.

I'm working on it myself.  Miss Universe, you're way overrated.

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2 hours ago, Victimorthecrime said:

"Preach brother preach!  In a million generations women will still not get this.  A man is what he can do.  Period.  No one gives 2 flying shits how nice you are, in fact if you are nice it is considered evidence of being a pussy. 

Another sublime post by the Master of Concision. 

There are so many resources today...online, in books, in magazines, on TV...that try to give men advice on how to get women. Every one of them has a different suggestion, but ultimately they agree on one single point: if you aren't John Holmes or a multi-millionaire, you have to cut off your testicles and treat the woman like the Virgin Mary in order to have one. As you said in a post recently, Victim, it's pure goddess worship.

Paddy Cheyefsky was an absolute artist. Total genius of expression:

Quote

...He shrieked at me: 'You old fink. You can’t even get it up anymore.’ That was it, you see. That was his real revolution. It wasn’t racism, the oppressed poor, or the war in Vietnam. No, the ultimate American societal sickness was a limp dingus...

 

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I wonder who decided that men are what they do? Because I personally think we are all so much more than that. I agree about society needing to value kindness more. I have wondered if there is a fear of our vulnerability often at play and that is perhaps why traits such as kindness and compassion are often viewed as weakness. I admire kindness, compassion, and sensitivity..

I was thinking about my son I imagine when I asked about your room at home, @Small. He moved across the country and is doing very well, but he hasn't been home in over 2 years. The door is open here for him always and I love when he's home.

Do interactions with your niece bring you moments of happiness? I hope you are able to feel that and connect with it. 

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