blossom is......................soooooooooooo sleepy that she's not sleepy.... she wishes she could go to bed but she has too much painting to do......... this will be her 3rd sleeppppppless night.. | hmmm. she didn't have a good day today coz she got no sleep last night and then she was working all day today and it sucked all the energy out of her | but......................................... she is gonna drink lotssssssssss of coffeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i don't know what to say. i'm not very happy right now but that's normal.. i don't like being sad, i don't like being home for 2 weeks, i don't like lots of stuff but i especially don't like being chubby | i'll need to start exercising lots and not eating again:O| ykw is already starting to drive me crazy. there's not much i can do about that. i'm beginning to wish i could drive so that i could go away sometimes. i need to make all my bad feelings go away so that i can focus on my painting. but
well today sucked. it was the worst st. patricks day i've ever had in my whole life. i don't even feel like talking about why. i spent most of today crying in the house on my own. well that's no surprise is it????? it sucked. and it was all because of 2 of my housemates. they are probably the most fake people i have ever met.
decisions, decisions too many STUPID decisions. i hate them. i'm putting one of the decisions i have made into action tomorrow. i'm quitting therapy. so wish me luck!!! i know she will try talk me out of it like the last time. oh great. fight right outside my house.
i got my fashion handed up on time and i picked print in the end. i'm so sleepy today... i kept falling asleep in college so i came home just now so that i can try catch up on my sleep. it's sunny again today! i CAN'T WAIIIIIIIIIIT for rag week!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i hope it stays sunny !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i'm a stupid idiot. i've already messed up my life and i can't take any of it back. stupid stupid me. everything is wrong and i can't fix anything. everytime i try get a grip on it it slips and everything goes out of control again. i can't do anything right:( i'm tired. all my thoughts are mixed up. therapy is not helping me. too many decisions to make:(
blossom - doggy didn't go to college today but she has a good reason this time.. she was in sooooooo much pain all night that she couldn't sleep... she even had to go sniffing for painkillers at 6 in the morning... fortunately she found 2. blossom - doggy didn't get to sleep til about 7 and then her alarm went off at 8! she just couldn't get up... she was sooooooo sleepy.... poor doggy ( now the painkillers are starting to wear off and she has none left ( blossom - dogggy says "WOOF woof WOOOOO
wow. somehow daddy has figured out that i hate college and i'm not happy there. i thought he would be mad, that's why i didn't tell him but he's not mad. he's being nice and he says that he doesn't mind if i change colleges next year and he told me not to worry. and now i'm crying. why do silly little things like this always make me cry? i need to stop.
i dunnoooooooo what to do.... go to colleeeeeeeege or not go to colleeeeeeeeege??? even if i do go i'll have to leave eaaaaarly anyway...hmmm? guess whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat iiiiiiiiiiii ammmmmmmmmmmm gettttttttttting my haaaaaaaaaair dyyyyyyyyyyyed todaaaaaaaaay maybbbeeeeeee i'll jusssssssst stay home ) i cann work froooooooooooooom home!!!! it's nooooooooooot like i'm gonna goooooooooo back to bedddddddd or anything!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ) ohhhhhhhh.....
well, i dunno what to saaaaaaaay..... but WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! amazing!!!! something freaked me out a little but if it's meant to be i suppose it's meant to be!!!!
hmmmmm ( i wish i didn't have a cold... i was doing ok this week til i got it ( i have so much to do before tomorrow and i dunno where to start coz my head is all messed up and i just want to sleep so bad but i can't ( i think i'm going to cry i don't want to go home tomorrow :"o(
today kinda sucked but it was ok. painting is sooooooooooo frustrating ( i had therapy this morning. i was reaaaaaaaaly scared... how come nothing ever happens in therapy? i dunno. i'm really confused. then my cousin hurt me again but i don't want to talk about that. and i've got another cold (
OHMIGOD-OHMIGOD-OHMIGOD-OHMIGOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M SO EXCITED BUT NERVOOOOUUUSSSSS :eek: I HOOOOOOOPE EVERYTHING GOES TO PLAAAAAAAAAN, THATS ALL:D
my day started out good coz i was really excited about starting painting. when i got to college we were told to stick up the 4 self-portraits we had painted of ourself on our wall space. my first "surprise" was that my old tutor from last semester [yeah, the one that HATES me and everything i do] is one of my painting tutors this week. great. then my next surprise was that we have to paint naked man nearly every evening. i will be drawing naked man after lunch:( in 15 minutes. anyway, then the
i can't stop crying:( i think i'm just disappointed about not going to america anymore. i was really looking forward to that.. it was kinda the only thing keeping me going. i was supposed to go with my cousin and her friends but i called her tonight and said i probably can't go anymore. then i was on facebook less than an hour later and i seen that they had just booked their flights and they had left comments everywhere about how excited they are blah blah blah and then i started to cry and havn
i just asked my angels to help me today and then my angel book opened on the page "let your angels help you". so whenever i need some help i can ask the angels and we can work as a team to help meeeeeeeeeee! i had another strange dream last night... really strange. i wish i was good at interpreting dreams coz i'd love to know what this one meant.. :cool:
