i fucking give up
Well, starting over again is going REALLY fucking well so far.
I can't qualify for the insurance I need here because I need to have been uninsured for a period of 12 fucking months.
Getting forced to either go back to a job I hate (if I can even get it back) in order to live with a friend (which is reasonable, but I can't face ANYONE right now, let alone the retail public)
or stay trapped at my parents' filthy house trying in vain to scrape 5 or more years worth of crap and neglect off in return for sleeping on a couch and POSSIBLY getting some mental help.
OH WAIT
THEY'RE POOR AS FUCK TOO
how the hell do they think I believe they're going to get me a decent shrink who'll actually fucking help me do ANYTHING.
This is all bullshit, I never should have gone away, I should have either put on my big-girl pants and DEALT with it, or just slit my fucking throat.
Nothing is going to get better now, and it's only going more downhill form here.
I CAN'T FUCKING WAIT.
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