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To stay out here or return to Amishland?


brodman

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I told Jedidiah Id make this thread for him hed like everyones opinion he knows the end decision has to be his and all that but wants to know what everyone here thinks

Basic question is if you all had to decide the decsion like him about returning home to stay or remainin out here in the rest of the world with little to no further contact with your family friends and way you grew up for 16 years what would you choose and why?

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Thanks Mike.

btw That person I told you about from the other website I had been going to registered here. I thought it could be helpful to him however, he barely got a welcome in the new members forum. Maybe my telling him about this website was not a good suggestion. His getting lost reminded me of Hotspot and I wrongly assumed perhaps a few others could understand and offer support. He sent me an email stating he does not feel welcome or wanted. I asked Hotspot to write to him and kindly he did. I know only people you invite can post inside here perhaps you and the others would not mind him joining. I do not believe anyone hurting should feel all alone. He did not get a basic welcome from more than I think 2 people out of nearly a hundred reading his thread which is sad.

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I hardly do welcomes anymore. :) We seem to be having a flurry of new members joining and I find it hard to keep up. If you can tell me his username, Jedidiah, I will go and reply to him.

As to your question: I did not grow up in a culture different from the one I'm in now, so I know no other way. So I cannot make an informed choice. You are in a unique position. In the end, I would say what I said before: I will support whichever choice you make.

This is just a random thought:

Our world "out here" is messed up. When people are cruel and horrible, I want to say to you "go home". I am very alone and human bonds are very precious. Yes, there are exciting things here and many beautiful ones too, but relating to people is not as easy here. So much conflict.

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Id want to get to know the person first before inviting them in and then Domino tells me wed have to vote on it cuz even though this is my blog I really consider it everyones that posts

Also think I mentioned to you Ive been thinking of movin my blog off of this site altogether nothing immediate but is thought been bouncin around

I have noticed over the months Ive been here that a lot of folks join up and then you never see them again I dont know if the dismal welcome has anything to do with it but Id bet it dont help Its hard goin some place new with bunch of strangers layin out your problem or problems and then not even gettin a hi I remember when I joined tons of people read the post and although I get not everyone is in place or has advice but to be around here for a while and having known what its like to join up somewhere and probably feelin really self conscious to not be able to offer up a hi seems lame and dont gleem of supportive welcomin place

I get that all new people have to post in new members forum to weed out spam think thats good idea but doin somethin for them instead of only manin the door for potential problems seems odd Now we all know I couldnt be part of welcomin party anyway I did send pm to the new guy username is astoria Luna if you wanna say hi to him he seems like confused but nice guy

For the big decision Jed ya know like Luna said Im gonna support which ever you choose but like I also said providin I get lifetime visitin privilages if you return home for good

Until I went to stay with your family and friends my decsion would have been absoutly do not go back to stay now it isnt so cut and dry I still dont agree with lots of the "rules" but I get them better and dont see your parents as the uncarin selfish people I did before meetin them and livin with them In one way I think you should run home and stay and for my own selfish reasons I want you to stay out here and also think the world really needs someone like you out here If I got to make descion for you even though Id hate it in lots of ways Id say go home

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I went and replied to astoria. I remember reading the thread and simply not knowing what to say, I suspect the same is true of at least some of all the "Views" on the thread. Unfortunately we have also had many newbies join recently, so not everyone gets enough attention. Wow, that must be very upsetting to get such amnesia so often. Sure hope he can get to the bottom of this.

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OK, this might appear jumbled because I am so, tired but unable to sleep. If none of it makes sense let me know and I'll try again. :confused:

Jedidiah, the Mrs and I have talked several times about your impending life changing decision. I agree with Mike's thought about the world needing more people like yourself. The Mrs. and I also think the importance and presence of family is substantial.

When you and I first started talking I leaned more towards your staying out in this part of the world. Your excitement, intelligence and inquisitiveness I thought might possibly eventually make you depressed and feeling unfulfilled returning home. Family being very important to me I also thought your not being able to retain those relationships could be severely detrimental. There for I then started leaning towards your returning with a packed head full of fond memories to recall. Living within a world you know best surrounded by loved ones.

Then you became severely ill and I don't know if you remember or not but I asked if you had to decide right now, which would you choose? Do you remember what you said? You told me you missed your world but were so, happy to be out here you couldn't ever really see yourself being truly happy returning for good. I thought that was quite telling.

Now the Mrs and I have different opinions. My wife thinks you would be happy and fulfilled if you returned home. All the excitement and glam out here will likely wear off over the years leaving you to regret making such a permanent decision of not returning. She also thinks your sensitivity and kindness will be squashed if you remain in this part of the world.

I think not having your community and family right by your side will be tough. Not being able to visit or be a part of that world in anyway even tougher. I do however, think you would fair well not returning. You have that capacity to draw caring supportive people to you. Being able to study and work at whatever you desire, eventually making your own family I think could fulfill some of the emotional holes leaving your world would create. Overall I do think you could be happy and exceptionally successful out here in this part of the world.

I am glad you've had the opportunity to experience both sides of the coin sort of speak. The end decision as you know must be your own. Only you will have to live with yourself and no one knows you better than yourself.

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