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Maybe you're intensely real, and you're just faking fakeness.

You never know: if you get confused enough, you might forget all about it and just live. And that's all it takes to be real again.

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i feel numb all the time. the only time i don't feel numb is when i feel sad. but when i'm with other people i have to pretend all the time. like if someone says something funny i know i should laugh and find it funny but really i don't because i don't feel anything anymore. but then i have to force myself to laugh or smile anyway and pretend i found it funny even though i didn't... then i feel fake.

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It's okay: I got confused first. :-)

I thought at first that you were talking about a flower picture you posted.

So: you feel flat. You decide that you "have to" feel what people expect, so you fake it. Then you get angry at your own decision. Is that sort of how it goes? Is it possible that it's okay to feel whatever you feel, and to let people know it?

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We like you, Blossomy.

And, um, I bet I could've beat you in a most depressing person contest! ;-)

Maybe it's not possible to control what other people think, and in fact, people who like you for who you really are might be the only kind worth hanging out with.

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