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i have butterflies in my tummy....


Blossom

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i really do have butterflies in my tummy.. i can feel them fluttering around. i'm getting very anxious about moving out.. i think i'll miss it here. and i'll miss my family. and i'll miss having a garden.. i don't think i want to move out anymore:( i'll be all alone when i go and i'll have noone. i want the butterflies to be gone..!!

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You DO have butterflies in your stomach!!! [they are gorgeous!!--to bad they have to be making you nervous] [maybe you can let them out and watch them fly in your garden???]

I know it's scary, Blossom, but there might be some very special people there that you are supposed to meet. AND you might get some amazing art inspiration.

It's possible for ye.......... :D

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It's OK, Blossom. You will learn some things regardless. Later on, if you need to change colleges, you can. It's very normal to feel frightened by it all, but you are stepping out into the world, and there are magnificent things out there... truly. You will be growing your artful spirit, and that's the right choice, right?

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i dunno finding.. maybe i shouldn't go to college atall.. how am i going to socialise with so many people..? and who's going to remind daddy to take his tablets every morning and night...:D

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I know it's tough to imagine, but you will take it one day at a time. How do you think the other's feel? There are others there who are just as unsure about it all, even if they don't say so. Just because you can't picture good things doesn't mean there won't be any.

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I'm more balanced about it than I was last night, for sure!!! There is always crappy stuff to have to deal with, BUT, the staff I directly deal with are quite awesome for the most part, and the best part of all are the kids. THAT'S what I'm trying to keep my mind on, not all the crappy threatening stuff.

Is next Sunday your first night there?

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THINGS I'M SCARED ABOUT:

  • noone will like me in college and i won't fit in.
  • i will get artist's block and get kicked out.
  • my housemates will be mean.
  • my house will be broken into
  • i'll get stabbed
  • my life will get worse instead of better
  • i'll start drinking too much alcohol again and i'll become a party animal and junkie.
  • i'll get kidnapped
  • i'll lose contact with all my old friends
  • ill never get to fix my relatiionship with my family.
  • being independant and a grown-up
  • not knowing anyone
  • everyone elses art will be better than mine
  • not getting a job out of it

:D:(:(

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That's a lot to be scared of no wonder you have a fluttery tummy. Just remember most of these kids are away for the first time too. So you'll have something in common with most of them right off the bat. If you get artist block look at Malign's demented bunny. If that doesn't inspire you nothing will;). As for the rest of the list try to deconstruct it one fear at a time. See if there are any that you can just look at and say no I'm not going to worry about that. Get out of my head. I wish you the best of luck.

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i still have butterflies in my tummy today. this time they're excited instead of nervous!!!!!!!:D I CAN'T WAIT FOR THIS WEEKEND TO COME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i FINALLY got a letter from college today to say what supplies i need (there's a lot..) and they sent a little book with all the college services and stuff like that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIKES I'M SO EXCITED RIGHT NOW:D:D!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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