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Showing content with the highest reputation since 05/17/2008 in all areas

  1. Just posted some of this in the New Members thread, but I figured it was more appropriate here. I turn 26 this month and got here from the 26 year old virgin advice post when googling it on a whim. It is helpful to read how other people feel and are dealing with similar issues. First off to explain where I am: As I said I am a 26 year old male virgin, and (as others here have also said) I have never kissed a girl and never been in a real relationship. I understand the majority of my problem stems from a lack of self-esteem, but I fear the longer this continues, the less likely I will ever have
    261 points
  2. goose

    Still numb

    I have spoken here in the past about my Dad and his illness. He died 6 weeks ago and I have not reacted. I know when my mother died I grieved hard and felt it took its natural course. My Dad was so precious to me, it just feels so different this time, like I am in denial. I do know when I start to think about his death I easily can block it out. I have not been to his house since, nor have I been to the grave since the funeral. Is it natural not to grieve sometimes? Goose
    257 points
  3. Just started recently... i'm 193 pounds and 5"10 or 5"11 and I just feel disgusted with my body... im 17 years old and i have 2 months to look good for my girlfriend, she was away for awhile and i let myself get this way... i was 170 pounds and looking pretty in shape now im just disgusting. i made myself throw up a few times after i ate.. its only been a few days and i already feel really tired, but i don't care, if this is how i can lose 30 pounds in 2 months then im going to do that... i'm gonna drink lots of water so its not dangerous. do i need help? im already kind of addicted and liking
    218 points
  4. Anyone else have a problem with reading? It feels like my eyes are constantly moving, and wanting to stray away from the page.
    215 points
  5. noni

    Possibly Adapted BPD

    I need help. I don't know what kind of help, general or specific, but I need help. So I've been neglecting my own emotions as always, I voluntarily forget a lot of information that goes on, I can't handle listening to my parents helping me solve my problems even if they are objectively talking because it triggers very unpleasant emotions. I can't function right now, I have a lot to do. Not sure if I fit 5/0 criteria for BPD, probably I'll fit 4/9 criteria. I'm desperate and I need help. The reason I think I'm an adapted BPD is because I've been reading about BPD yesterday in general sources
    214 points
  6. .......................
    207 points
  7. eppursimuove


    Well havent been around in months, i feel ive learned a lot in the past time i feel good, im really lazy i sould remedy these soon with some activity. But in general im ok i think. Havent take meds in a long time, havent gone to teraphy either, last times i went my psychiatrist told me he saw me ok and he didnt see the need that i took meds for now, so i continue with out taking them, maybe ill go before christmass just to confirm im ok. Havent visited my psychologist also, but i sould go visit her to see everything is ok. One day I just decided to live more, still have those days when u dont
    202 points
  8. Hi - i've been reading these forums for a few months, but thought I should finally post. I think I have a quite complicated back story. Sorry if this is long, but I really feel I have to completely open up, and tell you my background so I can be properly understood. To start with, I've got a long history of OCD like symptoms. In fact, I have a long family history - all of my siblings (two sisters) have been treated for anxiety/depression/OCD, as well numerous cousins. Lucky family eh! I'm incredibely shy, socially. I'm terrified of even talking to someone on the phone. I even find calling a
    201 points
  9. chloem

    Hope and Emotions

    Today is the anniversary of my diagnosis and I wanted to celebrate by telling people how I was able to recover from Schizoaffective. When I was diagnosed, everyone told me not to listen to myself, treated me as if I was crazy all the time and told me I would never recover. I had no self esteem. My future seemed horrible. My life changed around because I read a couple of books by crystal hatfield. She taught me to write positive affirmations so that I could focus on the positive. When I focused on the positive, I saw new opportunities where others saw none. She taught me how to deal with the nu
    199 points
  10. [possibly graphic, possibly trigger] I started cutting myself a few weeks ago. I'm a 24 yo male in my first year of med school. I've never been able to have a girlfriend or anything like that despite trying. I tried the online sites but failed again. I guess I cut to punish myself because I feel unworthy of love or romantic relationships. I have no problem making friends (although no I really don't hang out with people anymore) but I could never seem to find someone with mutual attraction. I'm in relatively good shape physically (so people say) but I still feel repulsive, maybe it's my f
    197 points
  11. Athena

    Orchid Children

    A few days ago I read an article about how the short version of the "Transporter Gene" predisposes a person to suffering more from stressful situations than a person with the long version of the gene. They categorize these people "Yellow people" and "Blue people". Today, I read in the newspaper about "Orchid Children". The description sounded so similar to that for the "Blue People" in the article above. The fact that I heard about something from two completely different sources talking about essentially the same thing really piqued my curiosity, so I googled “Orchid children and transporte
    193 points
  12. It's really interesting that you posted this. I was just thinking about it yesterday. A friend of mine has been going through a difficult time since her kids left for college. I've been trying to be supportive and can really understand where she is coming from having just been through it myself over these past few years. I think as you grow older you become more aware of your own mortality. You begin to question your choices in life and search for your true purpose. Everything takes on such more meaning and resonates deeper. I never thought of such things at age 20. My emotions now, at age 41,
    188 points
  13. I've been in hospital for near enough three months and I'm finally on leave for the first time. Okay, so it's just one night, but it's a start, right? I'd love to hear how everyone is doing! That means YOU!
    173 points
  14. Darkness


    is a cool dude who has taught me that only i can create strength for myself, both emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual! I'm there spiritually, but the other three are kind of failing, mostly physically and mentally. There are certain financial barriers to physical and mental, and more less tangible trammua stopping me from getting there emotionally, but I think I am starting to see the darkness at the end of the tunnel, if that makes any sense lol. though a question, what is the difference between mental and emotional health? I know how spirtuality feels different then emotional, but is
    161 points
  15. rachel

    Is this love?

    I would be so much thankful if someone help me. I have a friend that I like so much, I care about her, I think about her everytime and so many things remind me her.. I just wanna stay together with her, and make her the happiest girl in this world, but I can't tell her about my feelings, 'cause I know that her never going to love me like I do. I'm sad. I guess sometimes of it just be a big passion, but no, no way. I'm jealous about her, because I fighted so much hard to get her trust, and love. Sometimes I think how I'll survive if she date someone, love someone, and that someone don't be me.
    151 points
  16. David O

    Recommended readings

    This is possibly one of the most useful sections in the forum as it may provide others with the benefits of excellent self help resources. Following, as a starter to this section, are a list of a few highly regarded books. I'll be adding to the list periodically as time permits and my hope is that others will join in For Depression: The Depression Workbook Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy Revised and Updated The Feeling Good Handbook Ten Days to Self Esteem Mind Over Mood (text and workbook-- 2 books) For Anxiety and Phobia The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook Hope for our Ne
    131 points
  17. Hello. I'm 15(female) and when I was 14 i was "raped" or "sexually assaulted". I use quotations because i don't believe it "qualifies" to be called that. If you could take a few moments to read this quickly and tell me if you consider what happened to me "rape" or not i would very much appreciate it! I had a 16 year old boyfriend when i was 14. He got very serious very quickly and i trusted him because he was a not-so-close family friend. One day, he told me to give him oral sex. I refused. He proceeded to ask again, demanding it. I refused. He then slid his penis across my face and told
    115 points
  18. danni


    I agree with you about that, darkness. I guess I'd like to one up this a bit. I sometimes think that it's not that they DON'T get people of other faiths....it's that they WON'T. I think some people are so rigid and self rightious that to even entertain the idea of tollerance and respect for the beliefs of others is unimaginable to them. Maybe they think they are compromising their own beliefs by trying to understand and respect those of others. Something that makes me really uncomfortable in this thread is the black and white labeling of faiths. Whether it be satanism, christianity, buddhism
    113 points
  19. Hello. So basically my question is how to get out and date? I am 28, never had a girlfriend, never dated or even kissed a girl and I want this to change. Most people will say friends are the best way to get out and meet girls but I don’t really have any friends so that is one option that is out. Another thing people always say is get out and do activities that I enjoy, hobbies and such, but I been trying for a long time to find gatherings for the hobbies I am into with no luck. I have tried online dating but a big problem there is with no real world experience I lack any for the online world a
    111 points
  20. Does anyone here have this same thing? I tried to find a phrase that summed up everything, so I found this: I can not sleep and can not wake up. My mom says I do not sleep because I'm on the computer. But this is not the point. I get on the computer because I have no desire to sleep. I almost always stay up until dawn. Without eating anything. But most times I stay up until dawn, and still lie awake until dawn the next day. And do not feel sleepy. Sometimes I get 29 hours without sleep, and still unwilling. But for some reason I lie down, I sleep for 18, 19, 24 hours. And when I wake up, I'm s
    90 points
  21. Since the first week of school, with my six years old, I lived in fear of the people. The school was a terrible phase and still is. I stay quiet while my coleagues robbed me, beat me, offended me. Every day was like that. Always stand it firm, but in the fourth year of school, I started to not go to class, and when I was there, I was standing at the door afraid to enter the room. So I fled from school once, and did most confusion. As I already said in another topic, I have not finished school, out of fear. I'm so ashamed and afraid of people, that if I'm in a public place and my hair standing
    88 points
  22. Hi all I realise this topic might have been discussed in detail in earlier posts, but I am new here and was just looking for some opinions from community members. I worked with my counselling psychologist for 9 months. We had to terminate as she is moving to another city. We cannot continue working via skype as this is just not an option. I feel rather interesting about this termination. On the day it ended, I broke down and sobbed for half an hour, almost as if going through short-term grief. I loved spending time with her and getting to know myself using her guidance. We would laugh often bu
    82 points
  23. I am convinced that there must be something wrong with me. Some sort of mental or psychological disorder. Firstly, I’ll say that my memory is lacking severely. I can watch a movie and forgot a lot of it by the next day. I remember very few events from my childhood. Of those events I do remember, I don’t really remember anything in vivid detail. Everything is a blur to me. Family and friends usually speaks of events that had occurred in the past but I cannot remember any of it. My memory seems to really hinder my experience in school and my ability to learn, well, anything. Even things I’m real
    80 points
  24. It's funny that I'm posting here considering I'm in hospital but when a patient absconds and returns drunk, there are no staff for support. I've just spent 8 months in hospital, I won't be spending 8 months here too so I'm trying to stay well and keep safe but tonight it's easier said than done. After binging on chocolate and crisps, I spent half an hour with my head down the toilet. I have torn my eusophagus. Again. I won't be eating again because I can't keep this up. I'm 5'7" and went into hospital at 7 stone, came here at 11 stone. I never really spoke here about having an ED but hey guys,
    78 points
  25. I have never actually got anyone to agree to have sex with me, but if they did, and laughed at it I would [removed description of violent act]
    74 points
  26. Faint

    ...si trigger

    I self injured for the first time in 3 months ...voices and thoughts telling me to do it Dont have a therapist nor do i want one ...i see my dr every month and we talk about the cutting She thinks that am getting better with it but am not ... wanting to do it more and more as the months went on Last night was when everything started to come out about how i was really feeling about my cutting Been wanting to cut for months and i feel i need to do it again and again Until there is no more skin left for me to cut Am on medication for my voices but am on the highest dose and there nothing
    74 points
  27. Hello all. It seems there's a lot of things wrong with my life, but I'm not here to complain. I'm sure someone has got it worse even though my life was hell. Okay, so basically my abusive father somehow got a hold of my phone number and has started calling me every weekend for the last 3 weeks pretending to be all friendly and stuff. I only answered the phone because obama is forcing me to get obama care, so I signed up for VA healthcare, I answered the phone thinking it was them. Anyway, today he finally showed his ulterior motive: Asking for cash. I'm doing alot better than he is, whi
    72 points
  28. Being almost 30, disowned by my parents for no reason at all, I'm trying to see things from their perspective. As most know, my brother died in may of 2011 from a drug overdose. Most also know that my parents considered him the "favorite" out of the two of us kids. My whole life I've been treated like dirt, and didn't really see that it had affected me until the last year or so. After my brother's death, they started verbalizing what I already had figured out, when they'd say things like "we've lost our only child" or "I could have coped better had it been you" and things of that nature.
    71 points
  29. Endlessnight


    I posted this on another thread, but since I didn't get any replies I am posting it here too: Two or three times I have written posts on here only to delete them shortly after. It's not that I don't feel this is a safe place to post, but that I feel maybe I dont need to go there. The memories I have inside me have been with me so long that I dont know if saying them out loud will make a difference. I mean, if i've lived with them all these years I must be okay, right? Why do I only seem to have memories of bad things? I try to remember nice things about my childhood, my teenage years, my 'mat
    70 points
  30. Esruc

    What is this?

    I have these times were I feel like I really want to change my life. I want become better. Eat healthy, lose weight, go outside, make friends, and be happy. I tell myself I can do it, that I will do it. Then, I sink back down and asks myself, "What's the point?" I've never had a real friend before, why should that change now? I'm a piece of shit who doesn't deserve to be happy. I'm not meant to enjoy life. Is this normal? Do other people go through this too?
    67 points
  31. I was wondering how long one's lifetime can be then. Let's say that I'm gona live up to age of 90.. Presently I'm 20+ I've been talking medication for couple of years already. 70 years left. If I take medication for 70 years more.., could I possibly live up to 90.? Or..? The thought about taking medication for more than 70 years seems a bit unreal.. or maybe why should that be strange? Maybe it does nothing to the rest of our bodies. What do you think about this?
    66 points
  32. nathan


    I was born to hate people. If I lived in a less civilized time i'd be a rapist and a murderer. I'd be someone despised by everyone. I wouldn't be good enough to be infamous. Id just be the bad person I am, and no one but the unfortunate ppl who knew me would know from experience. Experiences theyw ish the y never had. Because like I'm a sick disease. I do things the wrong way. inevidably. I might aswell accept who I am and not try to be different. I might as well accept that I am a bad person and go with it. at least I could take a stand on that, so ppk could know who I am, and therefore othe
    65 points
  33. I don't try and look up on the Internet "does size matter"? Anymore, I try and focus on other things and yet on forums, friends, all the sudden it pops up. It's really upsetting to try and feel about yourself and a woman just tears you down. I'm having a hard time believing that all women don't care about this.
    62 points
  34. This is my first post here. I've tried being strong and resisting but 2 weeks with constant fear and hardly any sleep has forced me to seek help. I just feel like giving up, as though whatever I try, whatever I do I cannot win and life seems to shaft me constantly day after day. I work part time cleaning toilets which feels degrading, this job was only a stop gap until I completed my electrics course, however, I recently found out that the course was bogus and I have been conned out of £6000 with no way of getting the money back (its very complicated),worst part is I had a loan for it so I'm s
    62 points
  35. It might be useful to consider why you can't brainstorm on your own. It might also be fun to try to imagine that you are brainstorming with your therapist, on the inside ... Is any part of you willing to try to take on the therapist role for the sake of that role-playing game? After all, even in therapy, it's the client who is doing the bulk of the work, at least once the client has given themselves permission to do that in the presence of someone else. Maybe you need to give yourself permission to do that in the absence of someone else?
    62 points
  36. I would like to apologise in advance for any potential ramblings, I've hardly slept these past 48 hours. Life as a law-abiding paedophile has been quite inconvenient. I have been surrounded by children (mostly family) for a majority of my life, and being sexually attracted to some of them makes for some fairly frustrating situations. I'm 22 years old (my 1992 in my name should be 1991, I blame my laptop keyboard) and I've recently moved out and gotten my own place in Denmark. I've had sexual attractions to pre-pubescent boys for as long as I've had sexual attractions, and close contact or seei
    61 points
  37. Hi, im a 40 yr old guy who is in need of sexual emperience with women. i have only had normal sex and want to have more adventerous sex! i haven't even had anal sex or !
    60 points
  38. This is hard to talk about but I'm going to try my best to make it not sound wrong or like something else. So when I was younger whenever I saw another kid my age go to the bathroom or naked or anything, I was simply excited or interested. It was a weird thing, it just caught my attention. It was a form of curiosity. Anyway, as I'm growing older, I'm having moments where that part of me sort of returns. I'll state here now that I do not think I have a sexual attraction to children... having sexual attraction to something, in my opinion, is something much greater than how I feel in these s
    55 points
  39. Walked into the sex shop with a buddy and saw this beaded three inch penis sleeve. Nothing too crazy. For the female users I ask..... Is this worth buying? It basically is a silicone tube you stick your dick in that adds girth but it also has beads on it. I figured it looks fun and it won't completely come off like I'm trying to thicken my penis because of the beads. I was thinking about buying a 5-6 inch vibrTor she could maybe use if she lets me do anal while she uses it. I dunno. Just throwing ideas out there. I want to surprise her, don't really feel like asking.
    54 points
  40. Hello everyone , my name is Cindy Helen , I'm 17 years old . I am depressed . I always had problems with the school lacked in many classes and so I lost five years. All seemed well at the beginning of this year , I moved in with my father . I was sad because I hate him, but the school was motivated to accomplish my dreams . I moved to my mother's house , now I live alone here , because she works in another city . I can not leave the house . Do not go out three months or in the courtyard of my house . I spend the whole day sleeping , or lying down . Reading , eating . I really want to change ,
    54 points
  41. mts

    The man in the mirror

    So anyway, blah blah blah, stupid rant. Night.
    53 points
  42. Luna-

    Cuteness Overload

    The title is just a warning that this is about lolcats (and loldogs too if anyone has any, we won't be too felinist). If you think that is mushy, this is the spoiler. Grumpy Cat may make an appearance just to balance the overload; we can all be crabby. Some days extra crabby. But mainly, this is supposed to be funny. Feel free to contribute any funny ones you have seen. This is the thread background: And here is the first one:
    52 points
  43. Cynthia

    CBT for ED's

    Several people in my cbt group had a lot of success with using the TEA form thought counter exercise in changing the way they looked at food and eating. I can't comment on first hand experience but it changed the way I looked at things and reduced the accompanying anxiety to almost nil so I can certainly see how the process would work on ED's as well and anxiety and panic disorder which I did suffer from. It may be worth looking into. The book we started my group with called Been there, Done that? DO THIS! by Sam Obitz is real good and straight forward if you want learn more about cbt. I hope
    52 points
  44. Quite frankly I'm tired of her BS. Earlier this year she cancelled my trip to the store the day before and I was OUT of food. All of my money was in the bank so I had no way of taking public transportation. I had to order pizza for nearly 10 days while waiting for a few dvds to sell on Craigslist. I spent $153 on Pizza-Hut. She refused to take me yesterday but knowing the shit she likes to pull I scheduled with public transportation a week in advance.
    52 points
  45. lola

    Mental Hospital

    I've been thinking a lot lately about death and killing myself. I want to see a therapist, and I've told my mother that I want to - she's supportive, but she's really disorganized and busy, so she never really gets around to helping me figure it out. I'm in college in a different city than her. So anyway, what I want it to go to a mental hospital. I know that it might be really really difficult, and maybe even not a positive experience - the rigid schedule, the restrictions, the lock up...but I want more than anything to have a stable, controlled environment for a short time so I can sort my s
    51 points
  46. This is what I feel is the female equivalent to a man dealing with a small penis. From the wiring in a females brain to a mans there's a goal. Birth children and competing. It's extremely important. Dealing with family and society and the expectations. The fact there's no cure for you. I feel like this would be far worse for women if it were acceptable to mock them and laugh at them for their misfortune. I posted the link below. Men with small dicks please read and let me know go you agree this is a close comparison to how women would feel in our shoes. I don't buy the fat skinny big tits smal
    50 points
  47. Mava

    Depressed for too long

    Life is pretty hard, I have been thinking it is that way because so I can appreciate the good times. Somehow I feel like by dying I would set myself free from all the troubles and things that torment me everyday. This thought has been with me for a long time stuck to me as the final and glorious solution. I have taken so many so many pills and go to therapy for too long, psychiatric hospitals once and it was useless. I spent a couple of years taking classes that I like and trying to meet people and make friends, but people can be cruel and most don't care or don't wanna deal with it. I am alo
    50 points
  48. My dad was recently diagnosed with Advanced Prostate Cancer. Complete shock... My dad is in better shape at 65 than I am. He isn't the best communicator. I'm trying to get a grasp on the emotional effects for a vibrant man going thru radiation and hormone therapy. (He refused surgery). Anyone here been thru this personally or had experience with a loved one going thru this? Just looking for some insight on the emotional side. I've read all the medical stuff. Worried about his mental state at this point. Thanks
    50 points
  49. I don't know what to do. I feel like no matter what happens things are always going to go wrong. I'll start off by giving you a summary of my life I guess. I've had traumatic experiences, as most people have. I've been abused by my dad growing up. My parents are both hooked on drugs. I was raped when I was five and molested when I was fourteen. I've had three people close to me murdered. One being my cousin when I was eleven, a childhood friend when I was twelve, and I just recently discovered that my aunt's death was also a murder when she passed back in january. I'm always having to watch pe
    50 points
  50. A little background: My dating success over the past few years has been rather abysmal. I've had a couple blind dates that didn't go over well and it seemed they were there mainly for the free meal. I think the last kiss that I got was just a quick peck on the lips in 2006. So my boss tells me that we're going to have a visitor from one of our overseas departments and wanted volunteers to take M to dinner a night or two. That's usually not a big deal, we possibly hit some local touristy things, get something to eat, drop them back off at their hotel, and then submit the dinner bill in an ex
    48 points
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