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Calla last won the day on July 6 2010

Calla had the most liked content!

About Calla

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    Senior Member
  • Birthday 05/27/1976


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  1. Hi there...I don't know where you are based but I am in the UK and they just still dont seem to look favourably on ADs. When I first summoned the courage to see the Dr (after many yrs) I was crying my eyes out asking for help and he said "maybe you just don't deal well with stress!" I finally got some medication but was told it would only be for 3-6months. I got to a year and then they said time to come off. I truly feel I have suffered from depression most of my life, adult and child. But they say medication is a small part and CBT is the most part. But as I say my work life is complicat
  2. I just dont understand humans at all. The way they can be towards each other. I see little goodness in my day to day life so I always think "well whats the point, I may as well get drunk!" I was doing really well on 40mg of citralopram. I felt like a different person. Now over a yr later the doctors have said it's time to come off. I am now down to 20mg every 2nd day and I feel awful. But I just feel they wont believe me. They say all I can do now is CBT but because of my job I am away all the time. Like I say was winning the battle!
  3. ....now losing the war. Feeling like I want to be dead again now. And realise the plan is to drink myself to death as no one will ever love me. Pathetic again.
  4. Yes I mean anti depressants. Thanks for your reply. Ok I wasn't quite honest....it's me.....prob no surprise. I hadn't been near anyone for 7 yrs and been depressed (I think) most of my life. I have been on ADs for a yr and have recently slept with 2 men.....and its come as a bit of a shock to me. And also made me feel worse about myself....again no surprise.
  5. I have heard a story about someone on ADs who hadn't had sex for many yrs and then when on ADs started having sex with strangers. Just curious about any comments on this. Is this a worrying side effect?
  6. As a woman I'm with IrmaJean and I'm sorry you guys have met some lame women!! Life experience has taught me many things and a man is a man regardless of anything else and if you fit together then you fit. I know my words dont mean anything but just thought I'd chip in.
  7. Calla


    Thank you. I really don't want to stir up bad feeling believe it or not. It's just as I have been getting better it is still something which I feel I can't move on from I guess. It still affects me. So I felt that maybe coming back and just expressing how I felt might help. I also wanted to help others by being on here from time to time. I found that very helpful when I was last here. Feeling like I could maybe make a tiny difference to someone just by acknowledging them.
  8. There is a release from pain and there is a way forward. You just have to do a bit of work finding what works for you. But the alternative is not an option because it is just nothing,,,
  9. Calla


    Well thank you for asking. Well things got better after I was diagnosed ADs. But I still have a LONG way to go! When I was here I received some good advice but also felt the victim of some inexcusable bullying...given what this site is supposed to be about. I felt I had to come back to make sure no other vulnerable people were picked on.
  10. Calla


    And thank you Leo. I felt horrbily bullied here, But I accept other people who are entrenched in their own lives dont get how much they are destroying other lives.
  11. Calla


    Thank you...I remember you being nice to me. And IrmaJean. But most others had no patience, forgivenesss or understanding. I appreciate this site is hard to police. But being called Mental HELP means that people dont expect to be villified.
  12. Calla


    Since the last time I was here my life has changed a THOUSAND fold....it is SOOOOO different. And I accept my faults. But I would just like to ask if people felt the bullying of me was justified, especially by one or two members? I felt this site did an enormous amount of damage to me and I think this should be addressed in case it happens to someone more vulnerable.
  13. Calla

    Hey y'all

    Hi Irmajean....crossed messages there!! Doing unbelievably better! Which I hope will prove to some that things can get better. |thank you so much for your support during the dark times.
  14. Calla

    Hey y'all

    Thank you. Thats very nice of you. I hope you are doing well. I don't think I know your story so I may have left before. But I will try and have a catch up and hope you are doing well
  15. You sound like someone who knows their own mind. I personally think it would stem from something deeper than watching porn. In this day and age of "political correctness" most of us feel the need to "Regulate" ourselves.
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