Small

I hope you're keeping well too. You're in my thoughts & prayers.

Merry Christmas my dear friend.

It's 2 years tomorrow that we lost our friend Resolute. RIP We miss you.

@retr0john Are you in the mood talk about some of your sparring sessions? I recall you saying you have a stocky build & walked down some of the taller guys. I'd love to hear some of your stories!

@retr0john Slight elaboration on his boxing - When we first started he had a mean right hook, for some reason he was able to get his bodyweight behind it right off the bat and we have since developed it. At that stage he wasn't able to hold his stance even on the pads - and ended up standing square on and crossing his feet etc. Over the last year I have got him to work on his stance and technique a little. Once he got that down, I noticed that his straight improved considerably! He is actually a lefty so should be in southpaw - but he is more comfortable in the orthodox stance so we do it that way. His speed isn't the best - and he is still learning to be coordinated. I suppose the latter just comes with practice. He's just recently started to get comfortable with punches coming back at him without going into a shell. It isn't pleasant to take full on shots from him now his technique is better. They HURT! In our last sparring session I actually had to tell him to go easy on that.I just put up a guard, stand in range and roll with the punches best I can. I wouldn't mind stepping into a boxing ring again and sparring so long as it is light work. Anyway - enjoy your sunday.

@retr0john Got a bit of time to sit at the computer so thought I'd respond to this. Yeah I am an indoor cat if you ever saw one. I live in a medium sized flat/apartment and have done what I can to make it a comfortable little haven and spend most of my time in it. Have had to spend a little more money than I'd like on the TV, movie channels and a lot of the little things to make it feel cosy, but I guess it's worth it in the end. I had you down as a hands on man so I am not surprised at all. I actually am quite comfortable in the meetings but occasionally I lose my cool (internally) and it really pisses me off that I can't say what's on my mind at those times! I have to direct a small team and when it doesn't go right I am accountable - and it's hard to be firm when I have to dress everything with a ''please'' and ''thanks''. Ugh. I am not very good at boxing!!! The Christmas before lasy my nephew asked me for boxing equipment. He is a physical lad - enjoys the rough and tumble play and can get aggressive when he's frustrated. I had a chat with my brother and told him it's probably a good idea to have him box or wrestle - that way he get's to express himself physically and can learn a good craft. That's how we got started really. I got him some boxing stuff and figured I'd teach him the basics myself. I did box for a number of years and also did muay thai so I can teach basics. I don't think I'm schooled enough to teach at more experienced places. It's a workout for me too - holding the mitts properly gets me active. I would love for him to wrestle because he looks like he's built well for that - but his dad doesn't want him to commit to it since he already has other extra curricular activities (Kids these day huh?). When I was young it was basically school, cartoons, and playing outside! I'm glad you are getting your kids to familiarise themselves with firearms. Especially your daughter - she may not like it now but she'll be grateful for it in the long run. I have only fired a gun as a child and that was on my uncles farm in the country. I actually got to fire two of his guns - a pistol and a shotgun. Other than that I have neither seen nor used a firearm. Do you own your own firearm? Do you like going to the range for leisure too or is it just to learn and keep sharp? Last summer when I went on a lot of walks there were times that I wished I was armed. I'm not a big guy - on a couple of occasions I walked past some rough looking guys and had I been attacked things wouldn't have gone so well Good luck with making those pasties! I can tell you from first hand experience that they can be quite delicious. As a teen I went to a place here called Greggs (back then it was called Braggs) on the high street for their pasties and they were something. I hope you get to join the gym and get back into working out. Do they have boxing facilities? Have fun at the Range John! Thanks for the well wishes. Keep your chin up.

Hi @retr0john I'm glad I saw this post, i very nearly missed it. All things considered i am doing okay. I've had a lot of ups & downs recently but have mostly been focusing on work. I've managed to find myself in a position where i do most from home & only got to the office for meetings, and that suits me just fine. I just got home from my sister's house where i spent the afternoon with my niece. We hung out, talked, debated & she put some fish & chips in the oven. I've been teaching my nephew a little more boxing. He's 8 years old - not completely coordinated yet but he's a big boy. Looks like he could have a heavyweight type build! So far he manages to stay in his stance with decent technique. He hits like a mule too. It's mittwork so far with very light sparring. (I don't hit him - he gets to beat me up & practices defending the occasional shot) I'm glad you're getting back in shape again! Were you terribly out of shape? Do you set KM targets or are you walking more casually? I haven't walked regularly since last summer & I'm hoping to get that going in the spring! I rollerskate too and that is a better workout than it looks What are you planning to do at the gym? I'm happy to see you had the kids over & got to cook again. I've been rooting for you these past few months & it's good news. Do you have any more plans to get together with them? And have you got the appetite back to cook again? I don't cook myself so I appreciate a well prepared meal. I mostly boil rice & make a veg & meat stir fry for both lunch & dinner. For breakfast it's toast & scrambled eggs. (No drinking raw eggs for me) Thanks for posting John. I'm happy to hear from you & hope you keep seeing positive developments.

Hi Beth, Hope you've been well. Please don't feel the need to apologize on my behalf. I'm glad the mods/admin have deleted the message though. I dropped in to contribute but it seems that my commentary is unwanted - so I'll be taking another hiatus. Thanks for being kind & patient in your conduct. Best Wishes, Small.

Hitler? Seriously? Hope you see sense & delete this comment.

Unfortunately I'm way past counseling as a career. I've lost interest in people's problems & would rather not, if it can be voided, know a great deal about them. I know it might sound paradoxical since I exchange posts with members on forum, but I usually limit this to my own issues as much as possible (unless i consider the poster to be a friend). To put it colloquially, I suffer so much that most people have come to irritate me. The one stipulation is how debilitating a problem is - if i believe someones issues to be similar or greater degree than mine in terms of how they limit their quality of life then I'm able to sympathise. I would however, based on the current prognosis of my wellbeing, place only select groups of people in this category & I assure you I'm objective as possible. I don't subscribe to the notion that all problems should be viewed exclusively on the emotional effect they are (self) reported to have on an individual. I've discussed this briefly with Klingsor & Resolute in the past. Self reports are often riddled with defense mechanisms and the emotionally intuitive (paradoxically) may appear to suffer the most but are also more greatly equipped to wrestle with their problems. My sole question is "how much does this limit your ability to experience a normal life?". I've found that this separates the men from the boys so to speak. To give you a working example - I would sympathize with a paralysed individual in a wheelchair, but I couldn't give a shit about the tears of some girl that's battling a depression that's rooted in her past. When I was less broken I'd move heaven & earth to catch this girl's tear before it fluttered to the ground. But today it wouldn't illicit any form of a (meaningful) response from me unless I was particularly curious about the moving parts. Having said that I will always consider myself a student of psychology and devote a great deal of my time to it. Anyway, I'm sorry to have hijacked your comments section. And I'm not trying to be disagreeable or display a show of rebellion to the status quo. I don't want to be disliked or anything, but wanted to clarify my position on the matter. Clearly you have maintained a respect for the human condition and that will make you productive as a counselor and as a member of society. I don't knock that I encourage it. Edit: Once you have completed your Master's program I hope you are able to transition into counseling. I would consider it a loss to the field if you somehow decided it wasn't viable.

Hi Malign, Well done on pursuing a Master's degree in counselling psychology - the mental health field was in fact an ambition of mine from when I was 19 years old and I have failed miserably in getting there. I hope that you are able to complete your course and go on to practice in the field. I have a read a number of your recent posts on the forum and you come across well in terms of your ''active listening'' skills as well as posing some valuable questions. As Beth alluded to, I think that the most important characteristic to have in being a counsellor (or working in any branch of mental health) is the ability to sympathise with the human condition. This is something that I no longer have and would prove a firm hindrance for me in the pursuit a like-minded career. I don't care much for most people or their problems based on the fundamental inconvenience - my problems far surpass theirs. Unlike me though, you do seem to have a healthy helping of sympathy and empathy - so I would rebut the worries you have with saying that you are in fact the perfect candidate to work in this field. You're engaging, and clearly have some instinctual notions of where to lead the conversation with someone that might be struggling. I'm rather conflicted here actually, not to sound like a sour puss or anything, but a part of me can't help but feel envy of your position in comparison to mine. You are supposed to be a stranger to my world yet you've hopped on over from software engineering to outdo me in the one thing I'm supposed to be good at. Anyway, I hope that my post doesn't prove to be a stain on this thread. I was trying to be nice (funny right?).