I was recommended here

[Ravenkitten]

I am ending this year as a 20 year old female whose depression has worsened since high school, and whose year has been absolute shit.

Reasons why 2015 has been the worst year of my life so far:

• Monty Oum, someone I looked up to very much, died at the beginning of the year.
  
• I suffered my first severe panic attack shortly after his death
  
• My depression began to worsen
  
• I had to start therapy
  
• I discovered that a good friend was actually a toxic friend
  
• I only got to come home for one month due to summer school
  
• I had several more panic attacks over the summer
  
• I lost my financial aid
  
• My boyfriend of four years broke up with me
  
• I have been disqualified from the school I was studying in before I could switch
  
• I may end up being disowned by my parents for being kicked out of school
  
• I very much want to kill myself because I would rather die than be a disappointment
  

This year has not been kind to me at all, and it's almost like high school is repeating all over again. My therapist from school said I might have PTSD, so along with my depression, it's just a whole crock of shit.

[TooOld4This]

Don't die, Ravenkitten; you're a precious person.

If you lose face with your parents by being kicked out of college,

find a different college and start over there.

When it comes to college, you aren't a failure as long as you try again and again.

You're not a failure if you screw up -- only if you give up.