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Feeling like a freak :(


RonaldU
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Hello everybody,

First of all, all my respect and empathy to all of you, this is very difficult to deal with. I just needed to talk to somebody that could understand how I feel. I understand that we aren't all in the same physical situation and everyone is different, but I think our suffering is quite close.

My problem doesn't come from my erect length, rationally I can assume I'm high average (6.3" BP / 5.5" visible cause I'm not in shape) so if it wasn't for my flaccid size probably I wouldn't feel like I do, which is horribly bad.

My flaccid penis is 1.5" visible length though. Probably my history in this sense it's similar to others on this forum: locker rooms are hell, jokes are common if I dare to be naked in front of anybody, any touching or preliminar with girls when I'm not erect or at least half is awkward, and so on. This completely destroyed my confidence and self-stem, and I feel really small when doing sex because of the image of me being always the smallest flaccid in every group of men.

I feel like a freak, like having something wrong. 4" change from flaccid to erect is not even in the data charts I've seen, I must be out of normal for that matter. Sometimes when being focus of jokes I tried to explain this, and said "I am bigger erect than some of you for sure", and of course it was worse, nobody believed it. I'm so tired of not being able to be comfortable in normal situations, like doing sports with friends and then taking a shower, or going to the beach and take a bath, etc... sometimes I don't even feel comfortable wearing pants because I don't have anything to fill them.

Internet doesn't help of course, if you don't have a 5" flaccid that goes into a 8" erect you are not even a man, and all women care a lot about size and laugh at you in secret, you know what I mean.

Is there anybody with 4" growing or am I really a freak?

 

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Hi RogerJolly and thanks for answering.

Yes, my flaccid varies quite a lot as well, but I always feel that to "don't cheat myself" I have to consider the smaller flaccid as the "real one". I may be wrong on this, I know, but it's very difficult for me to get out of that thinking.

I've done the bone pressed technique yes, but only for erection (I put BP aferwards in my open post) because is how erections are measured in studies. So I know my erect size is ok, you see I wrote I'm "high average", but because of how I look flaccid is not how I feel, in my mind I'm not ok.

I'm not gay, but if penis size is so important is because of what it socially symbolises, it goes way beyond the frontiers of the sexual intercourse. If it wasn't like that, we probably wouldn't be talking about this in a mental health forum and many people here won't be suffering as they are. We all would be way more optimistic about finding a girl with a good fit with us (there are bigger and smaller girls as well) and live and love.

I have a girl friend that when talking about sex, she always tells the story of her two boyfriends that were huge. The funny thing is she dumped them both after few months, despite she says sex was amazing. She is totally in love with a friend of mine that doesn't want to be with her, but they had sex, and I know from him he's average. What can explain this? Easy, if a guy with a huge dick (the alfa male that can destroy any vagina) chooses you, it means that you are an alfa female.

Big guys are left by women every day, so all this is not only about sex, is not even mostly about sex, it's way more important in a social context, and therefore al my problems about how I look and how I feel about it. I feel weird because I don't fit in social standards, my naked body doesn't fit on what a male should be.

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I range from 1.5" to something a bit shorter than 3". When I'm close to 3" I don't feel that bad.

I'm out of shape but not obese, I think I would gain 0,5" or so if I lower my fat % to the ideal one. Would be good compared to the amost 1" that I loose now, but it wouldn't be that drasticall I think. And for sex the BP length is usable so that wouldn't change.

 

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I think you bring up an interesting point that I also feel and is really messed up in society. Having a penis that is visually small(whether it's actually small like mine, or slightly above average like yours) makes men fear being naked at all. I often think how embarrassing it would be just to be seen without clothes on. How would people react to me if they saw what my body actually looks like. I'm slightly overweight too, and I know from multiple things on the internet that my body type is often used as a way to mock other people who are somehow reprehensible. It really sucks that society tells men, and women for different reasons, to be ashamed of the realities of their bodies. This isn't even a sexual issue, really, because it's just appearance. I don't know, I don't really have any answers or points beyond this. I just think this is really messed up and I hope that social progress leads to more empathy and less judgement of other people. That's what I strive for, at least. 

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Penis size it's really important, but mostly not in the way the constructed speech says.

We associate a big penis with power. If we had to draw a brave knight taking a bath after a battle, for sure we wouldn't draw a 1" dick. Why? That has nothing to do with being brave or strong, we "know" that. But we don't really KNOW it, otherwise I wouldn't be here and I wouldn't feel like s***.

Look at the gay community. Gays are the group that cares more about penis size in the world, or at least the gay friends I have do a lot. Why is that? The anus is completely different to the vagina, and all the theory about vaginal stimulation being better with a bigger dick doesn't apply there. But generally they want big dicks!. Same for many women, big dick means more than just mechanical action, it has a lot to do with appearance and psychological stimulation. Today I've read on this forum an article about a study in locker rooms, on how the biggest guys are more popular (and like I frustratingly experienced all my life considered to be the biggest when erect like if all the penises grow the same), and better considered in social pyramid... by heterosexual men!

That's why men with small penis generally feel like "they are not manly and are useless" and not that "they can have problems in intercourse with a % of women because of both persons anatomy", which is in fact the reality, as not all women have the same standard genitals. It is curious that in a world dominated by men, that is never took into account. It's the same thing again: if you are a REAL man, you can please ANY woman. And the only thing ANY woman needs to be pleased is a BIG DICK. And if she says the opposite, is because nobody with a BIG DICK FUCK HER (she had bad luck if she's pretty, or nobody wanted if she's "ugly") or she's lying.

That's our world :blink:

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Hello,

I'll definitely will check that old discussions on this matter, I know I'm new here and that obviously I'm not discovering the truth for anybody, just one argument lead to another :)

On 9/4/2016 at 5:16 PM, RogerJolly said:

You know, Ronald, I think it is very likely that some women quite genuinely don't think that "bigger is better" - at the very least ones suffering from a condition such as vaginismus, for example!

Seriously, If we look at things like sexual satisfaction surveys there is every reason to believe that there is a diverse range of sexual responses among different individuals.

Of course, I do think that is like that, like in every other thing every human is different.



 

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On 06/04/2016 at 0:37 PM, RonaldU said:

 

Hello everybody,

First of all, all my respect and empathy to all of you, this is very difficult to deal with. I just needed to talk to somebody that could understand how I feel. I understand that we aren't all in the same physical situation and everyone is different, but I think our suffering is quite close.

My problem doesn't come from my erect length, rationally I can assume I'm high average (6.3" BP / 5.5" visible cause I'm not in shape) so if it wasn't for my flaccid size probably I wouldn't feel like I do, which is horribly bad.

My flaccid penis is 1.5" visible length though. Probably my history in this sense it's similar to others on this forum: locker rooms are hell, jokes are common if I dare to be naked in front of anybody, any touching or preliminar with girls when I'm not erect or at least half is awkward, and so on. This completely destroyed my confidence and self-stem, and I feel really small when doing sex because of the image of me being always the smallest flaccid in every group of men.

I feel like a freak, like having something wrong. 4" change from flaccid to erect is not even in the data charts I've seen, I must be out of normal for that matter. Sometimes when being focus of jokes I tried to explain this, and said "I am bigger erect than some of you for sure", and of course it was worse, nobody believed it. I'm so tired of not being able to be comfortable in normal situations, like doing sports with friends and then taking a shower, or going to the beach and take a bath, etc... sometimes I don't even feel comfortable wearing pants because I don't have anything to fill them.

Internet doesn't help of course, if you don't have a 5" flaccid that goes into a 8" erect you are not even a man, and all women care a lot about size and laugh at you in secret, you know what I mean.

Is there anybody with 4" growing or am I really a freak?

 

If I understand your post correctly, you are a "Grower", use it as your Party Trick. I hav seen a Penis go from the size of a button mushroom to 8 inches, i hav only seen this once, but Bloody hell, it was impressiv!

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  • 2 weeks later...

RobaldU, we are in similar boats.  I am under 6" erect, but in pretty good shape, so I dont have much hidden by fat. 

My girlfriend has told me that my penis has the most differential between flaccid and erect she's ever seen, and she's seen a lot.  She is absolutely unconcerned with my flaccid size,  and she has,  in fact, said that if she was me,  she'd be very anxious about others seeing my dick flaccid.   She totally gets it, even though she is NOT one who thinks bigger is necessarily better.  The bottom line is,  she thinks I'm hot, and we have great sex.

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It's good to have somebody that understands you, specially if it is your girl friend!

That's the reason I've said that for us, this is not really "sexual", it is more social. I'm really anxious in everything related to nudity and the symbolisation of masculinity on flaccid penis size :/

For some reason I also feel better knowing I'm not the only one made like this :), but I still have big fears of being into another situation where I'm the object of laughs because of my flaccid size.

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  • 3 months later...
On 06/04/2016 at 0:37 PM, RonaldU said:

 

Hello everybody,

First of all, all my respect and empathy to all of you, this is very difficult to deal with. I just needed to talk to somebody that could understand how I feel. I understand that we aren't all in the same physical situation and everyone is different, but I think our suffering is quite close.

My problem doesn't come from my erect length, rationally I can assume I'm high average (6.3" BP / 5.5" visible cause I'm not in shape) so if it wasn't for my flaccid size probably I wouldn't feel like I do, which is horribly bad.

My flaccid penis is 1.5" visible length though. Probably my history in this sense it's similar to others on this forum: locker rooms are hell, jokes are common if I dare to be naked in front of anybody, any touching or preliminar with girls when I'm not erect or at least half is awkward, and so on. This completely destroyed my confidence and self-stem, and I feel really small when doing sex because of the image of me being always the smallest flaccid in every group of men.

I feel like a freak, like having something wrong. 4" change from flaccid to erect is not even in the data charts I've seen, I must be out of normal for that matter. Sometimes when being focus of jokes I tried to explain this, and said "I am bigger erect than some of you for sure", and of course it was worse, nobody believed it. I'm so tired of not being able to be comfortable in normal situations, like doing sports with friends and then taking a shower, or going to the beach and take a bath, etc... sometimes I don't even feel comfortable wearing pants because I don't have anything to fill them.

Internet doesn't help of course, if you don't have a 5" flaccid that goes into a 8" erect you are not even a man, and all women care a lot about size and laugh at you in secret, you know what I mean.

Is there anybody with 4" growing or am I really a freak?

 

You have my exact problem. My flaccid penis length makes life very unpleasant sometimes. I'm a similar size to you BP and similar normal. I wish by bulge was normal, just for an easy life. You're right btw. Sex has nothing to do with penis size anxiety. I'm not saying it can't play a part, but for me, it's other men. Being judged solely your flaccid penis size is fucked up, but a fucked up reality in our society. Nobody even gives a shit if you're bigger than them erect. All they care about is how it looks flaccid. I think we have to understand that we're dealing with two worlds here. The world of erect penis size and sex and the flaccid penis size and mens opinions of you. Both can overlap, but both can be completely separate and cause chaos with our minds equally. The 'Am I Normal?' and the 'Do Others Think I'm Normal?' categories are of the same ilk and cause the same mental disorders, but are equally destructive as separate problems. Obviously the man with the micropenis would say he'd kill for an average penis size and his flaccid size wouldn't matter, but that's only his judgement from the view of a man living with a micropenis. If his life was different and he had an average size penis but a very small flaccid grower, he'd be in the same mental state as we are. Same can be said for Billy above average. Even he feels small compared to other men with a huge shower. But life down here can be unbelievably crippling. I work with spiritual people who talk a good talk about acceptance and compassion and yet I've heard them talking about my assumed cock size and laughing. If only I could truly and clearly see this for what it is. The Ego's attempt to keep me locked in chains, scared to set foot in the world for fear of being judged and cast out of society as freak, never to try, never to trust and realise what I REALLY am! Am I the body who say no to swimming in the pool? Am I the body who say 'Not in this lifetime' to showering in front of other men? Am I the body that is crippled with fear at the prospect of being in public? Am I? Fuck that shit!!! I'm sick of it! I am not a body....I am free. For I am still as God created me!!!!

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8 hours ago, YeshuandMe said:

it's other men. Being judged solely your flaccid penis size is fucked up, but a fucked up reality in our society. Nobody even gives a shit if you're bigger than them erect. All they care about is how it looks flaccid. I think we have to understand that we're dealing with two worlds here. The world of erect penis size and sex and the flaccid penis size and mens opinions of you.

Yeah. Fucking shit bullies don't care at the end of the day. But then they'll always find something to attack you over, skin, hair, teeth, weight, nose. etcetera.

The more girls that Ronald fucks, the more the word would get around that he is a super grower!! Maybe the micropenis guy doesn't have that option?? Just sayin.

 

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  • 3 months later...

I know a guy with a 3" penis but he dresses well. You'd never know. He has a wife and a son. I have a 5.5 inch cock, I don't dress well, and you know my cock looks small. I have a wife and a son. On paper, I'm average, he's below average. But his whole life he dealt with his size in private, and looks average in jeans/pants etc. I dealt with my size in public, being laughed at, with the shittest bulge in history. You see what I'm getting at. I have my moments, but I'm not running over the same old ground till my heart explodes. I'm living life and loving everyone around me, even if they don't show me the same courtesy. We have to forgive and live otherwise this unfortunate situation will eat us alive. Hope you have a great Christmas/holidays ?

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