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So, basically, ever since I got cancer, my mother has seemed to really not care much for me at all. I have 2 brothers, both of whom have been suspended from school several times, the older in a great deal of legal trouble, something I suspect my little brother will soon experience as well. The reason I'm posting this is that even though I've never had any issues like that myself, she seems to greatly favor my brothers. This only began after I got cancer. It's just really upsetting that she could do that. She's now spent nearly as much money on my older brother for his problems too. She also tried to ignore my brother's drug problems for a while, even when he was stealing money from her for it. She also tried to blame it on me for getting cancer, even though she knew he had started several months before I got cancer. But the point is, anytime they do something wrong, I seem to get the blame for it. I experience constant verbal abuse and sabotaging of my life. And physically I suppose you could say she's right at the border of what someone could g to jail for. But what really dug deep today (it's been worse than usual this week) is that my little brother was in the bathroom when I needed to take a shower. He was recording some video for an app called music.ly and using the mirror for it. When I asked him to move so I could take a shower, he began cussing me out and started hitting me. (something I'm not allowed to do anything about) Then my mother comes up and he tells her what happened and she begins beating me too. I now look up and notice this post is getting to be quite long.

So, to end this, any ideas or advice?

Anything is welcome, even if you simply had similar experiences and can offer no assistance.

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hello, kres; and welcome to the community. sorry to read about your cancer and your situation at home. my experience hasn't been exactly the same, but i'm the oldest of my siblings and i think i got the rawest deal (both in my family and life). anyway, take care. and i hope things improve for you.

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5 hours ago, Resolute said:

hello, kres; and welcome to the community. sorry to read about your cancer and your situation at home. my experience hasn't been exactly the same, but i'm the oldest of my siblings and i think i got the rawest deal (both in my family and life). anyway, take care. and i hope things improve for you.

Thanks for your support friend. Arigato

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Can you move out? Or go live with a relative? You shouldn't have to put up with that, cancer or no cancer just as a human you shouldn't. It seems to me she might view you as less of a human since you got cancer though or she is emotionally disconnecting from you in case the worse happens. But like I said even if you didn't have cancer parents play favoritism all the time. Have you ever read a child called it? You might relate to it. I am sorry this is happening to you. 

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Kresivo, I'm so sorry you are going through all of this. It sounds as though your mom has a lot of her own issues that don't reflect on you. However, her behaviors do affect you. :( I'm not sure how old you are, but I hope you are able to find support and help with this situation. Is there another adult in your life who is supportive? If not, would you be able to share with a school counselor?

Is there any place for common ground with your brothers? Do you enjoy any activities together or are they always distant, unsupportive, and abusive? :(

Are you able to do anything kind and nurturing for yourself? Take part in an activity you enjoy...write, paint, exercise, read...or anything that feels connective and comforting. Do you have friends who are supportive? You are bearing a lot of weight being ill and also living in the environment you are. I wish you strength and healing.

 

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