ThomasKimbrell Posted June 18, 2016 Report Share Posted June 18, 2016 Depression is like someone kicking you in the stomach over and over again and telling you you deserve it and brought it in yourself Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaLa Posted June 18, 2016 Report Share Posted June 18, 2016 Hello, Thomas, welcome! I'm sorry you've been struggling with depression . I think your description sounds poignant... Do you want to share more about your experiences and problems? What brought you here? Take care! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThomasKimbrell Posted June 18, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 18, 2016 I am manis depressive and seem to do 9 things correct and or thing wrong.It is the one I do that gets me fired and treated as if I am a miscreant pariah in this society. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaLa Posted June 22, 2016 Report Share Posted June 22, 2016 (edited) I'm sorry, Thomas, that I haven't replied sooner ... It's sad that people around you treat you so unfairly ... Do you feel like sharing what happened? (You don't have to, of course; but perhaps it could help "to vent" a bit here.) How are you coping? Have you some support; some help from family, friends and/or professionals? Is there somebody who helps you to put things that happen to you in another, useful perspective? (Perhaps we could, if you describe some situations that made you feel so refused by society (?).) I think that besides careful listening, this can be very important to get when one's depressed, because depression makes us see everything "in dark colors only" and exaggerate the magnitude/importance of unpleasant, unfair, sad, ... things that happen to us. I know the feelings are real and "denying" them wouldn't be helpful at all, but trying to see them more as a symptom of depression then as an adequate reaction to "the unbearable world / life" could be, at least in some cases, a way to getting better. I cannot know if this would be your case, but we could find out if you feel like writing more about yourself . Good luck, take care and keep posting! Edited June 22, 2016 by LaLa added content Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThomasKimbrell Posted June 30, 2016 Author Report Share Posted June 30, 2016 I have been doing stupid things at work that I should not be doing. I am scared they are going to fire me. I am 60 years old and I am very aware of age discrimination. I will end up on the streets again with God yelling in my head it's all my fault, I brought on my myself. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LaLa Posted June 30, 2016 Report Share Posted June 30, 2016 Isn't there a possibility to defend yourself by the fact that you're suffering from a mental illness? Perhaps that was "the underlying reason" why you did those things and perhaps it could be understood, mainly if you "show" to your employer that you're well medically treated so you suppose to "get / do better". Are you indeed in some kind of treatment? Could you get more - like if you're only take meds, could you see a therapist for some time to learn to deal better with life and with your inner harsh voices? I suppose you might think, due to depression, you don't deserve help, compassion, forgiveness, ... but you do. When you only let yourself to be punished by others and you even punish yourself by your self-blaming and by refusing help, it can really go worse - I understand that you're scared ... But I believe you still have some possibilities to do something "to prevent the worse", although it's probably hard to actually do it - to initiate the change for better... What do you think? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IrmaJean Posted June 30, 2016 Report Share Posted June 30, 2016 Did someone talk to you like that in the past, Thomas? Sometimes we develop an inner critic too that can be very harsh. Do you also have an inner voice that encourages you and takes care of you? How might you take care of a friend who felt the same as you do? How would you talk to him/her? I'm not sure what might be happening at work, but is it something you might be able to prevent or are you not feeling confident? Is it possible that you're judging yourself harshly? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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