Really Need Help... This is Messing me Up

[negligibleselfesteem]

This is the first time I've got this off my chest... ever. I am 19, and have had 5 sexual partners. I am currently in a relationship that I REALLY want to last. I never worried about my size until one time, I shit you not, my "friend" and his cousin looked under my pants while I was asleep (we were 15 at the time). They, off-hand, mentioned it the next day, like it was no big deal that they did that. I used to be much bigger (in weight) and at the time, was much smaller (in penile size). Now, at my hardest, I measure roughly 4.2 inches in girth, and 6.6-7 inches in length when I push back groin fat. with groin fat, I appear to only be 6-6.2 inches long).

I am aware that according to statistics, my length is above average, and my girth is below average. My worries are as follows:

1. My girth is so fucking small it makes me depressed any time I think about it.

2. My girlfriend says that when she had sex before, it always hurt, but with me it feels good (which leads me to believe I just have a really thin penis, and thus only makes me feel worse)

3. Due to my contemplative nature, I think about how, because of my size, any girl I'll ever develop feelings will inevitably cheat on me because I will be unable to satisfy her. (I have an obsessive, extremely-hurtful thought that I will be cuckolded by any woman I like.)

4. My self-esteem and confidence suffer greatly due to the aforementioned reasons.

5. I'm unable to take pride in my intelligence, kindness, and emotional maturity -- ironic, right? -- due to this constant fear and anxiety.

6. Any time I see another male, regardless of age, gender, etc., my mind INSTANTLY goes to thinking that he must have a very large penis.

 

Now, I am able to consciously identify how insane this sounds. However, my fears nonetheless negate any logic. This is difficult for me, because besides this one fear/obsession, I am majorly logical. PLEASE help me... I've experienced several apathetic and even suicidal episodes because of this. Thank you... 

[YOTH]

We, as humans, have an uncanny knack at finding our own flaws and magnifying them to the point of insanity. I won't bang the old drum and tell you how lucky you are to be above average blah blah because I know from experience, it doesn't help. Some guys in here have micropenis' and although you could argue that their struggle is a more obvious hell, SPS affects every average man on the planet in one way or another. And the rest of the above average men suffer from PS at the very least, because our world revolves around the little fucker. But be assured, you are normal. You are NOT going to get cuckolded because you're causing pleasure rather than pain. I know we are convinced every girl loves the pain of a big dick but it's bollocks. They want to enjoy the pleasure of sex just like we do. Push comes to shove, ask her would she prefer if you were thicker. I know she mentioned her previous boyfriends had more girth, but she might actually prefer yours. Personally, pal. As a guy with a statistically low average 5.5, you've got nothing to fear. You sound like you've got your head screwed on and you don't sound like you're crap in the sack. Count your lucky stars, appreciate what you're blessed with and if you really want extra thickness, buy a rubber sheath thickener. You don't lose any sensation because your bellend comes out the end. But that's only if you're desperate. You owe it to yourself to have your own back. You don't have a small cock, and your gf won't cuckold you. I hope you find the peace you're looking for. You posted on here, that's the first step. Maybe go read through some previous posts, some are heartbreaking. Good luck in whatever you do, I reckon you'll be alright. Take it easy ☮