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I don't know who I am


PrettyLou
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Hi, I just joined the group. 

Im having a bit of a hard time, I'm 23 and have 2 recent major achievements in my life, but my depression takes away from it all. I don't know who I am, where I belong and why I should still stay here. I have seizures so I can't afford to leave home as I can't get a 9-5, even though I have 2 jobs I don't earn enough to be able to save. 

In my life I would like to get married to someone caring, loving, supportive and handsome. That would make me happy, to be with someone I love. God has revealed his plan for my life and I have acted on it very quickly, to the point where people think I have it made, that I'm happy, but I'm not. 

I need to leave home and be somewhere safe where I don't feel so horrible. There's too many bad memories and stuff going on with different people and I have no one to talk to. Or I have people to talk to, but don't know where to start. I am embarrassed about some of the stuff that has been happening to me. 

I hope I can talk to some of you...

Love from PrettyLou 

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Hello, PrettyLou, welcome! :) 

I'm sorry your depression and seizures are taking so much away from you :( ...

Trying to find out "who we are" and "how to live" is (and/or "should" be?) part of the lives of most of us. But trying to do it while struggling with depression is much more challenging...

Do you have a therapist?

I hope you'll find a way to share more your issues here with us and that then it will become easier to do it also in person, with at least one good friend.

We are here to listen :) .

Take care! 

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Hope you find a way forward, PrettyLou.

Just because your career and relationship aren't finished yet, that doesn't make you a failure.

Plenty of people are in your situation when they're your age; i remember i certainly was.

It looks very hopeless, i know; but it's not.

Keep doing good work at the jobs you have, and try to find options for further education.

I don't know what country you're in, but if you're in the USA or Canada (as it sounds), there are community colleges that can give you very useful (and inexpensive) career education.

 

PrettyLou, there's a company somewhere out there who needs you.  Not somebody like you; you.   There's a young man somewhere out there who yearns for a girlfriend, and you're perfect for him.  

Don't lose hope.  You'll make it to your destination one day at a time.  Keep going to work and meeting people.  You're perfect for someone.

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Thank you. I don't have a therapist. I was in therapy for around 6 years. Just to clarify I do work just not as much to save or have financial control, and I have a first class degree. Having said that, the work that I do means I travel for some of the year and so I just feel like it's pointless to start therapy. I really didn't like therapy anyway, I just felt really emotional all the time. 

Recently, I've been receiving a lot of prayer and I think I might be healed from my seizures, but I'm too scared to declare it. I would hate for them to come back...

 

And thank you, I think there is someone out there for me too! ☺

Thanks so much for talking to me!

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