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Dreams and Hopes


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I've kind of been lacking motivation. It's not necessarily cock related, but that defo factors in. I'm not unhappy, I just can't answer the "What do you want?" question. I have no clue what I want to do or where I want to be. I've wound my passion for ideas in too. I'd get really excited and hyped up about something, that'd last a week or two then I'll hate whatever it is with the same passion. I'm just not that interested in money, so that closes a lot of doors. Most people do things for financial freedom but I personally put very little stock in it. I don't like being poor, but I'm happy with enough, which we have right now. I'd love to know what my next move is, but as it stands I'm at a loss. 

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1 hour ago, YOTH said:

I've kind of been lacking motivation. It's not necessarily cock related, but that defo factors in. I'm not unhappy, I just can't answer the "What do you want?" question. I have no clue what I want to do or where I want to be. I've wound my passion for ideas in too. I'd get really excited and hyped up about something, that'd last a week or two then I'll hate whatever it is with the same passion. I'm just not that interested in money, so that closes a lot of doors. Most people do things for financial freedom but I personally put very little stock in it. I don't like being poor, but I'm happy with enough, which we have right now. I'd love to know what my next move is, but as it stands I'm at a loss. 

I feel the same way you do about money. I'd be happy with just enough to survive on my own. I'm no longer looking to have a family so I only need to think and take care of myself. I'm no longer interested in owning the latest German sedan/sports car/suv either. Hell I'd be happy with a Ford Fiesta or even a Renault Sandero. 

I still want to lose weight, learn to be a decent cook, be slightly more adventurous but to be honest it's for me, merely ideas to pass time. I'm not looking to be the best version of myself so I can make friends and influence people. I guess I'm just looking to make my existence as painless as I possibly can and nothing else. I think I'm making sense.

 

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My 2 cents I think it is important to engage in goals where we enjoy the process of getting there.  Guys that are depressed and anxious don't do well w a grueling hellish schedule.  We need to like the work or we will just say fuck it.  

Me, I have to be aspirational to some degree.  If it ever becomes all doom & gloom I will just walk in front of a train.  

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21 minutes ago, Small said:

So you are human? Do you mind sharing these projects with us?

That's what I'm told. I'm one of these *humans* everyone is talking about. I'm writing a book (I can't even look at it). I'm writing a musical which I love (can't bear to think about it atm). I made a magazine to sell on the street and now my spare room is filled with them (I could sell them, can't be arsed). I started painting, and then turned against them and threw my paintings in the attic. I wanted to start my own cleaning business so I arranged to meet a woman who had one. Before I met her I'd fucked it off and wanted to eat own head, so I cancelled on her. I write tons of music that I love, then if anyone asks me to play something they like, I hate the song forever. I started a band, got a great response, got back on the booze, had to kill it. I'm not unhappy, I just don't get any satisfaction from the things I'm supposed to do. If I followed any of them even half way down the line they'd work, but I'm not interested. I can create, but I don't have the patience to nurture. I make an exception for my kids ?. I absolutely HATE being complimented or acknowledged positively, that's why 95% of bands never top their first album, after that you're scrambling for validation. I dunno what I'm talking about. I'm happy, why chase peoples expectations? Get a job, provide, be a man. It's almost like people will sacrifice being a good person to be a 'working' dickhead. Lead follow or get out way!?!..........I'll get out the way.

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@YOTH

I tried to write once but, my writing came off either rushed or lethargic. I've said this before on the forum, but I'm at constant odds with the 9-5 working day & 40 hour week. Most people slave away and for what? A roof and running water? There's something very wrong there. We're not designed to live like this, some adapt and others never can. 

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@Small I have the same problem with writing, I really enjoy writing but don't enjoy what I've written until a few months later. I wish I could express in words how I talk, because I read like a different person. Me speak good, me no write goodly. All my working class charm is juiced out of my writing leaving nothing but a fruity husk of my former blah blah yada yada blah!

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I have the opposite issue; I communicate and express myself more effectively through the written word than I do verbally, though I still feel uncomfortable writing on my phone. :/ Me write good, me speak not so good. :P

I think it helps if one enjoys the work one is doing and gains something out of it, aside from money. For me, I like to see that I make a positive contribution, both at work and at home with my family. I generally feel at peace with my life as it is, my main concern now is my children's well-being and their future.

Take care, everyone.

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5 hours ago, YOTH said:

@Small I have the same problem with writing, I really enjoy writing but don't enjoy what I've written until a few months later. I wish I could express in words how I talk, because I read like a different person. Me speak good, me no write goodly. All my working class charm is juiced out of my writing leaving nothing but a fruity husk of my former blah blah yada yada blah!

At least you tried. 

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3 hours ago, Small said:

@TinyBlackDick

I have things that I work towards - goals and variations of them. I understand we can't all have this, but realistic targets met with consistent forward momentum are helpful for a man. Measure is very important too, over exertion never helped anyone.

I apologise for the negativity I guess I just fail to see what I could possibly offer this world but thank you for the advice. 

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@TinyBlackDick You offer hope, I know that much. A lot of guys in here are blindly falling through life but you always engage and start amazing conversations. You kind of make people want to answer you. That's not nothing. There will always be people coming through here and I'd rather they find you than some of the others (not that I'm slagging people off). You should maybe look into helping people with the same issues as you, I think they'd get a lot from talking to you. You know the ins and outs of this thing, a lot of younger guys don't have a clue. You are suffering, but you're always there, replying. Sometimes that in itself is a huge weight off. Don't be so hard on yourself TBD, it wouldn't be the same in here without you. 

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53 minutes ago, Small said:

Ouch.

Did that sound harsh lol? Fuck, I wasn't talking about anyone in particular, although looking back it does look that way. I just hate it when he says things like that about himself, he's got a lot to give, especially in here. I was referring to the anti-hope brigade. I can put up with guys going through stuff, but the no hope stuff is depressing as shit. I fucking hate writing in here, my context is all out of whack. I was referring to the few occasions where I've had my comments dissected and shit on, I'd prefer to find someone like TBD rather than have one of those experiences. 

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