Obsolete Posted June 7, 2017 Report Posted June 7, 2017 Are you infuriated with the kind of person you turned out to be? I most certainly am. YOTH 1 Quote
YOTH Posted June 7, 2017 Report Posted June 7, 2017 I'm feeling depressed atm, can't seem to shift it. Can't concentrate, can't focus, can't cope. I could really do without cock anxiety on top of it all and I'm reeling from bullshit at work because people. love. drama. and I haven't got the energy. I'm so fucking tired. I'm not angry (although my fuse is short, no pun), I'm just tired. I'm not meditating because I keep falling asleep but I miss doing it. I'm unbelievably anxious about going back to work, I don't feel ready and yet it's way overdue. I feel like a failure, but don't care either, which makes people crazy. I think I'll just go through it again, no antidepressants, just go through the middle. I'll come out the other end eventually. Quote
Helpless_loner Posted June 8, 2017 Report Posted June 8, 2017 I hate the way I was born (tough, I know) and I hate how that has affected my life on MANY levels. RazeU 1 Quote
IrmaJean Posted June 8, 2017 Report Posted June 8, 2017 I was talking with one of my daughters last night and I noted that she was being particularly harsh with herself. I told her to try to be her own best friend. I asked her how would she treat and respond to a friend who was struggling with something similar? Would we judge another person the same way we judge ourselves? It seems we are often the least compassionate with ourselves. It's something I try to be aware of myself and work on...always a work in progress. @YOTH, you have a new baby and that can be a major change, even when it's a welcome change. Are you getting enough sleep and rest? I hear you about work drama. I do my best to not engage in it or I try to put up an emotional boundary, if at all possible. It can be challenging to be in that kind of environment with no way to physically remove oneself. Does it help to focus on self-care? Maybe do something self-nourishing? I hope everyone sees some light and feels better soon. YOTH 1 Quote
Resolute Posted June 9, 2017 Report Posted June 9, 2017 On 6/8/2017 at 0:45 AM, TinyBlackDick said: Are you infuriated with the kind of person you turned out to be? I most certainly am. i'm very displeased with everything in the world, and with how i and my life have turned out. Obsolete 1 Quote
YOTH Posted June 9, 2017 Report Posted June 9, 2017 Had some sleep and feel a lot better. Had nightmares but can't remember them. I sometimes wonder if heaven would be waking up from this place and not remembering a thing, just some vague recollection of unhappiness. Then half way through the day going "Oh shit, I remember now, I was this creature with a small sex organ, and there were these boxes, with images, I watched them all day...weird". And then shrug it off as nothing and carry on having the universal orgasm for a few billion millennia before I fall asleep again, per chance to dream narf narf. Quote
Helpless_loner Posted June 11, 2017 Report Posted June 11, 2017 And yes, I do feel angry too a lot of times and when not angry, depressed which I hate. I hate the fact I as born with a 5.5 inches long (in a good day) 4.3 inches girth (also in a good day and the one that hurts me THE most) and a almost non-existent one while flaccid. You know, I also HATE that those lacking inches prevented me from feeling better with myself and thus, having a normal life. I would give inches of height, my beard, by hair and even a freaking lung in exchange on being just normal in the likes of 6.5 inches of length and 5 something girth. You know, I don't want to be freaking Ron Jeremy, just a normal average guy.... Oh man, this is tough and yet nothing compared to other's problems. Which, being honest, doesn't help me either. Quote
YOTH Posted June 11, 2017 Report Posted June 11, 2017 I'm hating the lack of confidence I have regarding work. I'm fully aware that it's bulge related, and I can't seem to get it together. I can't do anything to fix the problem, I can't seem to change how I look or feel. I was in McDonald's and some fat twat working there was looking at me and smirking, I wanted to shove his fat spotty head in the deep fat fryer. When I'm angry I want to kill everyone who looks at me funny. A world chock full of freaks and they have the audacity to laugh at me!?! I'm so tired atm, so fucking tired. I have a limited time to work and actually make some money but I'm too scared. Every cunt and his dog have jobs and I'm too scared? Scared of what exactly? It's a shitty job for shitty money and I've been out of the have for too long. It was never an issue for me 10 years ago, what the fuck have I become? A recluse. I'm too tired Obsolete 1 Quote
Resolute Posted June 12, 2017 Report Posted June 12, 2017 2 hours ago, YOTH said: I was in McDonald's and some fat twat working there was looking at me and smirking, I wanted to shove his fat spotty head in the deep fat fryer. When I'm angry I want to kill everyone who looks at me funny. A world chock full of freaks and they have the audacity to laugh at me!?! i doubt the fat guy was laughing at you. YOTH 1 Quote
YOTH Posted June 12, 2017 Report Posted June 12, 2017 He wasn't. I think I have postnatal depression. Obsolete 1 Quote
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