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Hello everybody, I'm new to this site, so please don't be so harsh if I did something that is out of rules, and also sorry for my English, it is not my native language.

 

I'm a 19 years (virgin) boy, who has a very small penis which means around 4-4.3 inches when erected. I'm also obese (5'9 feet and 222 lbs), I'm just mentioning it because some said if I'll lose weight my penis will be bigger (under that I'm not meaning, it'll actually start growing, but more will be seen after the fat pad went away, which is not that big anyways and not so soft so I do not know.). Actually, when I'm in "doggie style" and having fun with my "artifical vagina" its 4.7 inches. When I grab my penis and push it back until (almost) the bone its 5.9-6 inches, but as I heard its a fake size because it is impossible to put it that deep into a girl since it is not even possible to reduce the fat pad down the bones. I also have a strange fetish which might be funny for you (I do not know how is it called in English, but its about tying something around my balls that will make it go lower, I hope you understand what I mean....) so when I do it and of course it makes my skin stretch or I do not know my penis is actually bigger like around 5.1 inches... That might be my real size if I'd lose weight? Or is it just another fake size that does not even matter? Also my other question would be men who has the same (hilarious) size: Have you ever had a sex with a girl that did not laugh at your tiny penis? Or do you even have a family? Because soon I'll want to have a family since I won't be able to live alone... To go home to an empty house that I can't even call a home.... I think I'll commit suicide if I'll be rejected that much .. I'll most certainly give it up .. Anyways, another question, which is for women: Would you live your life with a man who has this tiny penis I have ? And please tell the truth I'm not here for lies, I know what I know, but I must know other people's opinion too. Also if someone here, who has the same sizes and have a family please contact me in PM, I'd like to have a chat with him in the near future... 

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Hey there, saw this post and thought I should offer my advice.

Most importantly, please take my good advice and do not commit suicide. Think about it logically - if you do commit suicide then there is no way anything will ever get better, but if you remain alive then you can improve your life and in all honest I think your situation is nowhere near as bad as you think it is, and I will explain why.

Firstly, you have said that you are 19 years old. That means you are young. You literally have your whole adult life ahead of you which means you have plenty of time to improve things and if you put the work in, things should get better if you take my good advice. I am nearly 31 and have enough life experience to be able to tell you a lot of things. I wish I had done things differently in my 20s as I went through some very bad times especially in my early 20s!

Secondly, you can lose weight. You do this by eating proteins such as fish and chicken, fruit and vegetables, unsaturated fats like olive oil, and good carbohydrates like brown bread and pasta, while avoiding sugars, saturated fats and bad carbohydrates most of the time. I have lost weight this year using this method, and my weight has gone up and down over the years. I was very slim when I was 19, but became fat in my early 20s, then lost some, then gained some again, then lost some again. My weight has fluctuated, but basically it can be moderated if you are sensible with your diet.

Thirdly, your penis is not even that small. If it is 6 inches when erect, once you lose weight, then that will be like a normal, average sized penis, or maybe even above average. Honestly, why would you even want a penis bigger than that? Having a big penis makes it hard to get a condom on, makes it hard to maintain an erection, and makes it hard to have vaginal sex as your penis may be too large for a small vagina. I know these things because I have a big penis myself, and it is NOT the wonderful thing it is made out to be. Many women don't even care that much about penis size - it is something that men get much more obsessed over than women do in general.

When I was 19 I did sexual things with 4 different women that year, but none of them I actually had full vaginal penetrative sex with because my own penis is too big. Having a big penis is not what it's cracked up to be. It makes sex more difficult having a large penis, not easier. Those guys in porn with massive penises take drugs and have injections into their penises to help them maintain an erection. The bigger the penis the harder it is to get it to stay erect as more blood is required, and also if it is a bigger penis it is harder to get it into a small hole.

You say English is not your first language, where are you from?

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4 hours ago, Powerhouse8000 said:

Hey there, saw this post and thought I should offer my advice.

Most importantly, please take my good advice and do not commit suicide. Think about it logically - if you do commit suicide then there is no way anything will ever get better, but if you remain alive then you can improve your life and in all honest I think your situation is nowhere near as bad as you think it is, and I will explain why.

Firstly, you have said that you are 19 years old. That means you are young. You literally have your whole adult life ahead of you which means you have plenty of time to improve things and if you put the work in, things should get better if you take my good advice. I am nearly 31 and have enough life experience to be able to tell you a lot of things. I wish I had done things differently in my 20s as I went through some very bad times especially in my early 20s!

Secondly, you can lose weight. You do this by eating proteins such as fish and chicken, fruit and vegetables, unsaturated fats like olive oil, and good carbohydrates like brown bread and pasta, while avoiding sugars, saturated fats and bad carbohydrates most of the time. I have lost weight this year using this method, and my weight has gone up and down over the years. I was very slim when I was 19, but became fat in my early 20s, then lost some, then gained some again, then lost some again. My weight has fluctuated, but basically it can be moderated if you are sensible with your diet.

Thirdly, your penis is not even that small. If it is 6 inches when erect, once you lose weight, then that will be like a normal, average sized penis, or maybe even above average. Honestly, why would you even want a penis bigger than that? Having a big penis makes it hard to get a condom on, makes it hard to maintain an erection, and makes it hard to have vaginal sex as your penis may be too large for a small vagina. I know these things because I have a big penis myself, and it is NOT the wonderful thing it is made out to be. Many women don't even care that much about penis size - it is something that men get much more obsessed over than women do in general.

When I was 19 I did sexual things with 4 different women that year, but none of them I actually had full vaginal penetrative sex with because my own penis is too big. Having a big penis is not what it's cracked up to be. It makes sex more difficult having a large penis, not easier. Those guys in porn with massive penises take drugs and have injections into their penises to help them maintain an erection. The bigger the penis the harder it is to get it to stay erect as more blood is required, and also if it is a bigger penis it is harder to get it into a small hole.

You say English is not your first language, where are you from?

First of all thanks for you reply. I know that adult life is just ahead of me and I might overreact the situation I'm currently in, but I do not know.. I've heard so many stories about guys got left behind by their "love" just because their penises were NOT even that small than mine, but just slightly under the average. The 6 inches size I mentioned is understood when I totally push it back to the bones so I could never achieve this size even with a strong diet. I'd be even happy with 5.1 inches to be honest but I do not know if I'll ever lose weight will it happen or it'll just stay as small as it currently is. I've read many discussions about this question "will I have bigger penis I lose weight" and everyone said nope. Even if most of these people who ask those questions might think it really going to grow, but I just mean fat is around the penis, even if not that horribly amount of it but there is. If I just could get 0.8 inch or 1 inch by losing weight I'd most definitely start doing some diet or thing like that.. But I'm not sure if it'll give me my extra inch, and if its indeed not, there is no reason I should lose weight. I do state that 4 inches or 4.3 inches penis is hilariously small so that whenever a girl would see it she would crack up laughing immediately, also I've seen many videos of a guy who was doing a kind of "survey". He went online on different sex cam websites showing his penis (he was slim, having around 5 inches penis) and all the girls he had a encounter with just laughed at him telling different jokes or rude, harsh things, like their clitoris were even bigger than his penis and evil things like that.. That is why I'm afraid to go out with a girl or just to start doing anything with myself...   I'm from Hungary by the way.

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Hello @DontWannaLiveNoMore and welcome to this forum. As Powerhouse stated, you are young and have your whole life to live.

I'm much smaller than you and have been happily married for years with two children.

Having a small penis (or thinking you do) sucks but it's not the end of it all. If it was then no one would be on this site.

Boned pressed is the correct way to measure if you're comparing with scientific studies and yes if you lose weight it helps with the fat pad and can show more visible length.

Based on your measurements, it sounds like you're average or maybe a little better. 5.25" boned pressed with about a 1" Standard deviation appears to be the "universal average" and you fall nicely in it.

 

 

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You are not too small, even if you are smaller than what you believe is acceptable.  I wasted a few decades worrying about this, along with other aspects of the appearance of my dick.  I agree with those who are telling you to try to improve your physical shape; it will do more for you that any kind of stretching out of your genitals.  I'm 50, and I have only recently discovered that my dick is good the way it is (about 5"or slightly more, fully erect...girth similar).  It would look very small side by side to a porn star's, but I don't plan on making such a comparison.  I also think FUNCTIONALITY is important.  Don't overdo it with porn and masturbation... That can reduce your ability to perform in the real situation.

 

Hope you take some hope from sharing your fears.  You deserve to try to enjoy life.  And don't give up if you meet with failure.

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By the way @DontWannaLiveNoMore, I am a little overweight as well and have a fat pad. There are some important things to consider with a fat pad.

1) Losing weight will make your penis "look" larger but the actual size does not change because it "is what it is". Definitely helps with the appearance though.

2) All scientific measurements are bone pressed because we all have differing layers of a "fat pad" and this is the only way to get your "true" size.

3) The fat pad does compress and displace during sex. Just try the experiment where you place a hand on each side of your penis and gently press your fat pad in like it would be meeting a female's pelvis during sex. The fat pad is somewhat soft and flexible so it does move some and when you do this you will see more of your penis just like the female will "get" more of it during intercourse.

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I am so thankful I don't live in Europe...everything I've read here leads me to believe that small dick shaming is horrendous over there. At least in USA there are still isolated pockets where the women haven't devolved into absolute whoredom. Don't kill yourself friend. My dick is truly a pencil dick and nub all rolled into one. If for no other reason, stay out of spite. If you kill yourself, it's no different than putting an actual weapon into the hand of those women you mention. That's the only reason I stay (other than cowardice) because it's letting them win. Fuck that. Personally I'm hoping a leader will emerge from among us and release SPS rage onto the world. There have been hints, like that TSA agent who beat the shit out of a coworker for making fun of his size.

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2 hours ago, DontWannaLiveNoMore said:

 I start to feel I still have a minimal chance to have a family once.

You have a chance, there are numerous examples of small dicked members, past and present, who have participated in physically satisfying relationships. Even I, Klingsor the Vile, must admit that. It requires much more effort than normal though, on many fronts, to succeed. It's a question of how much effort you're willing to put in and how well you play to your strengths, assuming you have some which most people do.

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@DontWannaLiveNoMore yep, you are above average. There are guys in here such as myself who are less than 4 inches bone-pressed. I did pretty well in the dating world once i mustered up the confidence. I am not overweight, but i have the opposite problem. Short, small, thin body. So like an overweight guy, i'm not the ideal body type and not on the top of anyone's sexiest man on earth list. Part of it was i just dated for the fun if dating. I enjoy the company of women. I tried not to put too much pressure on myself to "succeed" (make her like me, get to 2nd base, get laid, get a relationship, perform well in bed, etc). I just enjoyed it for what it was worth. I was honest about my penis size at the earliest appropriate opportunity (when asked or when things started to get intimate), and still got some unsavory reactions at reveal time. But i also met a lot of great girls and had a lot of fun. I miss being single. I miss facing the challenge of dating with a small dick. Facing my fear and conquering it. My challenge now is how to stay sane and feel like a man within my marriage. My wife has told me she enjoys sex with me and that i am a great lover and she mostly enjoys oral anyways, and that big dicks have not been all that great in her experience. But i still feel like i'm not enough. Like i need to keep my eyes open for potential new partners because any day she might decide she needs to kick me and my small dick out the door. Which is INSANE. We've been together 6 years and if she'd wanted to kick me to the curb, she could have done it before we moved in, before we got married and had kids. She's happy with me. She loves me. But in my bizzarre mind, my dick must be a deal breaker. It absolutely must. I'm committed to it. To set myself up for failure, not because of anything i can control, but based on one part of my anatomy. It's self preservation in the form of self sabotage. I can't fail if i don't try, and i can't succeed because i have a small dick. And nit just at relationships, but careers, friendships, everything. But when i say that (like i do to my therapist) i hear how stupid it sounds. And i see how my dick is not my biggest problem. It's just a mascot for my own feeling that i cannot succeed.

Not to make this all about me. I just think you are doing the same thing that i do. You convinced yourself that your penis size (which again is not small) has cursed your entire future. Don't believe the lies you tell yourself. It sounds like an easy thing but it's deceptively difficult to recognize it when you just keep these thoughts in your own head. So keep talking about it. I'm glad you're here.

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@DontWannaLiveNoMore  I have u beat by half an inch buddy. I'm 4.5, 4.7 at its hardest. I completely understand the anguish that comes with it. It's like a gut wrenching torture that u can feel from deep inside your stomach. I can't really give u much advice because I suffer from the same extreme insecurity and feel ssuicidal from it on a daily basis, but I can definitely tell u your not alone. There's people who have it worse. Look at me for example, on top of feeling like I have a small penis, I also suffer from a sexual dysfunction that prevents me from feeling sexual pleasure at all. I literally can't feel my orgasms. I ejaculate and feel absolutely nothing. I also suffer with severe mental health problems. That along with the feeling of having a tiny penis makes me a pretty miserable man. Might I add I'm only 1 inch flaccid, which emotionally kills like crazy. Just keep your head up. Let's try to be positive together. I'm here if u need anything man.

And if it makes u feel better, I've litterly never had any complaints. I'm still a virgin, but I've had some sexual experiences with oral and being masterbated. I'm so insecure that every time someone would see it the first thing I would ask is "it's small huh?" And they would always tell me "no" and that I'm "average". I once asked someone to estimate how many inches they thought I was and they said "6" which is pretty average to me. So u being not that far off from me, I bet you'll get a similar reaction. Cheer up man. I hope all gets well with u. I sure hope the same for myself.

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On 10/23/2017 at 6:41 PM, Lodz said:

She's happy with me. She loves me. But in my bizzarre mind, my dick must be a deal breaker. It absolutely must. I'm committed to it. To set myself up for failure, not because of anything i can control, but based on one part of my anatomy. It's self preservation in the form of self sabotage. I can't fail if i don't try, and i can't succeed because i have a small dick. And nit just at relationships, but careers, friendships, everything. But when i say that (like i do to my therapist) i hear how stupid it sounds. And i see how my dick is not my biggest problem. It's just a mascot for my own feeling that i cannot succeed.

Your words are so poetic and so true. I cannot improve on this statement so I will just say "ditto".

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i advice you to try to lose weight like me , i lost weight in the previous months ,by jogging and eating less at night , and like others said it will make your penis look bigger, also 4.3 inches is not not desastrous i'm like you 4.5 inches , and i see many men in porn even with that size ahahh !  they fock and they don't care , ,you can overcome the small penis nightmare with practising sport, and praying there's nothing better than that can help you, also do not think about suicide , because only weak person suicides i'm 28 and still virgin , suicide leads to hell bro, so you don't want to  lose here and there , so whatever happens to me , even if i'm too sick and dying i let myself die vein after vein and never suicide , if you are a good man ,and believe in your god we still have our chance in next life.

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A friend and former member of this community killed himself recently. He was anything but weak. The argument about suicide being the "weak" man's way out is just another way of saying society or the community owns you, your life. Anyone who believes that has a slave mentality and is ruled by public opinion. Fuck society and what anyone thinks. The only reason society pretends to care about suicide is to retain an element of losers it can perpetually shit on and berate for needing an "attitude adjustment". 

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I always thought it took guts myself. If the people who shit on the actual reality of it thought about it for five minutes  they would realise pretty sharpish how unwilling they are to do it even if they contemplate it from time to time. Not that I condone it or anything, but it obviously happens more than society cares to talk about. 

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@Helpless_loner

That's my point. Suicide victims have family & friends that they love too. So the mental fortitude required to follow through on their plans must be strong. Even after all that, the psyche & body is wired for pain & death avoidance.

 

An easy example - try punching yourself in the face as hard as you can. Or keep your hand over a lit flame. You will find a great deal of physiological resistance to it. Now imagine the physical, mental & emotional defences that come into play right at that moment of planned suicide? I am not trying to glamourise it. Just saying that a weak mind won't see it through.

 

 

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So much, so so much of what we are is down to genes. You either have something or you don't. You are or you aren't. It defines & limits us. Choice plays a very small role in the formation of a man. A 6 foot 5, good looking man with a big penis did nothing differently to me to achieve his physical characteristics and that is what pisses me off the most about this entire topic. WE ARE NOT CREATED EQUAL.

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I have a wish that there would less stigma about suicide, that there could be more open dialogue about it with the hope for less judgment and more understanding. Maybe if we learned and listened, we could help one another more. 

Human beings have a tendency to push away discussion that is uncomfortable, I think, and may distance themselves from this by making judgments. I don't know that any of us are immune from potential depression or the effects of it.

It's still heartbreaking (and hard to believe) to know we lost a forum family member, Resolute, to suicide. :( :'( He is remembered and missed here.

@DontWannaLiveNoMore, you reached out here and I hope you find the community to be a source of support. We all need support at times, I think. I hope things look brighter for you in the future. Take care of yourself.

 

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