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Posted

It's well established that women can make money online from things like webcam, selling porn video clips, and even "financial domination". Question is, to what extent can men do the same?

Certainly, there is a market for it. Maybe not as big as there is for women, true. But there must be gay men, and probably even some women, that want to see this.

Just out of interest I was looking on a site called Manyvids.com and it seems that in addition to having women, there are men and transsexuals on the site as well. It's a video clip sale website where people upload their homemade porn.

So I decided to sign up just to see what it was about. I stopped at the point where they were asking for your real name and a photo of you. That's a definite no.

But in all honesty if you could make money from having a bunch of gay men watch you, would you do it? I think the most difficult thing about it really would be showing your face and having your real life identity discovered. That would be the worst part. And the part I couldn't deal with.

I consider myself to be straight but I guess sometimes you just do get curious about things I suppose.

Strangely enough, even though I tried signing up for it last night, coincidentally we got talking about the same subject at work today. Pure coincidence. We were talking about women that get paid good money by strange men to prance about in their underwear or a bikini and we were saying to ourselves whether we'd do the same for a bunch of gay men if we were getting paid enough money. One of my work colleagues said he'd be a prostitute if he was a woman.

This is a bit of an unusual thread but nothing coming from me is unusual.

So what are your thoughts generally on people making money using their sexuality, both online and offline? Is it a good or bad thing? Dodgy way to make money? Honestly, what are your thoughts?

Is it a question of money vs. degradation? When the degrading aspect of it becomes greater than the money, it stops being worth it.

Part of my jealousy of women seems to stem from how much money, attention, power etc they can get just using their sexuality, and that is feeding my self-hatred.

Yes I know I'm fucked up and confused, but isn't that EXACTLY what this forum is for?

Posted

I sort of wanted to be a stripper when i was younger. I even toyed with the idea of doing gay porn. I sent photos in to a gay porn site and got a huge rush from getting a quick resoonse that they wanted to meet me. But the idea of being seen and recognized kept me from pursuing it further. Also, fear of HIV of course. But a few times, i did have sexual encounters with men for money. Mostly for the thrill.

My ex-gf did camming and made pretty good money, even though she wasn't exactly a 10. But for a man, you have to be something extra special to make money in that arena. Huge muscles, huge penis, ... Women just have more market value in the sexual marketplace, especially those who are willing to do very dirty things. You should not resent them for this. Men are valued more in almost every other sector of society. The ones who do the dirtiest things get paid the most. So nitnonly are they objectified for money, but they are being taught that their value is in disrespecting themselves. It's a toxic situation. My ex handled it well though. She knew her limits. Her friend went through some mental torture from doing some of the same stuff though. She attracted (was attracted to?) these very verbally abusive men online, and it made her scared of men in general. She was a much more timid frail person than my ex though.

Posted

I said many times in my younger years that I am very thankful God made me a man. If I had been a female with the same mindset and sex drive then there is no doubt that I would have been a prostitute, porn star,  stripper, or at the very least a slut for rich guys who would buy me stuff. I've often made the comment that as woman I would be rich.

I also personally do not find anything wrong with people, male or female, using their sexuality to make money if this is by their free choice and if they are okay with it mentally. To me it's a logical market dynamic. There is a high demand for women, men, transgender to show their bodies and perform sexual acts (just type in "chat sites" in google if you don't believe me). If there is demand which reaps monetary rewards then someone will be willing to supply it. In one of my "dark" periods recently I was on a cam site and watching this one female's feed. She was pretty but not a "10" and she seemed to like to talk about all kinds of topics (kind of unusual for these sites but I really liked it). She doesn't even ask for "tips" but said she makes $6K/m from them on this one site and she is not even one of the top followed individuals! I find $72K/year not to be a bad year's work for probably less than 4 hours/day of effort.

I agree with @Lodz in that it's much easier for a woman to do this than a man simply because, as men, we are visual creatures so whether gay or straight we like to "see" the sexuality. Women tend to have a much stronger sense of fantasy than men so the visual aspects aren't as important. I also feel that women's bodies are artistic in nature with the gentle curves, smooth transitions, and soft tones where as most men's bodies are not very artistic looking.

A man can make money doing these things, just like a woman,  but they have to be willing to let go of their anonymity, be bi-sexual so as to maximize the opportunities, and have something "special" like a very good physique, be extremely attractive, and have a big good looking cock. Unfortunately I currently do not fit any of these requirements so I will continue my normal occupation until retirement and just dream about what could have been. :Dunno:

Posted
1 hour ago, Lodz said:

I sort of wanted to be a stripper when i was younger. I even toyed with the idea of doing gay porn. I sent photos in to a gay porn site and got a huge rush from getting a quick resoonse that they wanted to meet me. But the idea of being seen and recognized kept me from pursuing it further. Also, fear of HIV of course. But a few times, i did have sexual encounters with men for money. Mostly for the thrill.

My ex-gf did camming and made pretty good money, even though she wasn't exactly a 10. But for a man, you have to be something extra special to make money in that arena. Huge muscles, huge penis, ... Women just have more market value in the sexual marketplace, especially those who are willing to do very dirty things. You should not resent them for this. Men are valued more in almost every other sector of society. The ones who do the dirtiest things get paid the most. So nitnonly are they objectified for money, but they are being taught that their value is in disrespecting themselves. It's a toxic situation. My ex handled it well though. She knew her limits. Her friend went through some mental torture from doing some of the same stuff though. She attracted (was attracted to?) these very verbally abusive men online, and it made her scared of men in general. She was a much more timid frail person than my ex though.

Thanks.

Actually, I do have big muscles and a big penis. In fact, everything about the way I look physically is really good except one thing. I am tall, relatively good looking, muscular, have a large penis, a deep voice - all the desirable characteristics you could want physically in a man. The only thing I've got going wrong is that I'm overweight and have too much body fat.

I don't resent them for it. But although I appreciate your post, I also don't like being told how I should think or that my thinking is wrong.

If men are valued more in almost every other sector of society, what examples of things could you give? You could say men are more valued in business, industry, technology, sport, entertainment, politics, etc, even though women can make achievements in all of these fields as well?

That's all fair and well, but for someone like me who is stuck in a dead-end job and living in poverty none of that means anything at all. None of my intellectual talents, if I have any, are being put to any good use at all. I would consider myself good at writing but have had few opportunities to explore that or utilize my skills in that area.

I am nearly 31 years old. I live in a small flat (apartment) alone in a city and I have a small car. I work 5 days a week, 37 hours per week. The money I earn is insufficient.

Posted
29 minutes ago, lostboy1 said:

I said many times in my younger years that I am very thankful God made me a man. If I had been a female with the same mindset and sex drive then there is no doubt that I would have been a prostitute, porn star,  stripper, or at the very least a slut for rich guys who would buy me stuff. I've often made the comment that as woman I would be rich.

I also personally do not find anything wrong with people, male or female, using their sexuality to make money if this is by their free choice and if they are okay with it mentally. To me it's a logical market dynamic. There is a high demand for women, men, transgender to show their bodies and perform sexual acts (just type in "chat sites" in google if you don't believe me). If there is demand which reaps monetary rewards then someone will be willing to supply it. In one of my "dark" periods recently I was on a cam site and watching this one female's feed. She was pretty but not a "10" and she seemed to like to talk about all kinds of topics (kind of unusual for these sites but I really liked it). She doesn't even ask for "tips" but said she makes $6K/m from them on this one site and she is not even one of the top followed individuals! I find $72K/year not to be a bad year's work for probably less than 4 hours/day of effort.

I agree with @Lodz in that it's much easier for a woman to do this than a man simply because, as men, we are visual creatures so whether gay or straight we like to "see" the sexuality. Women tend to have a much stronger sense of fantasy than men so the visual aspects aren't as important. I also feel that women's bodies are artistic in nature with the gentle curves, smooth transitions, and soft tones where as most men's bodies are not very artistic looking.

A man can make money doing these things, just like a woman,  but they have to be willing to let go of their anonymity, be bi-sexual so as to maximize the opportunities, and have something "special" like a very good physique, be extremely attractive, and have a big good looking cock. Unfortunately I currently do not fit any of these requirements so I will continue my normal occupation until retirement and just dream about what could have been. :Dunno:

I've never actually been on these cam sites and actually paid to watch a woman.

Personally I do not have the money for that kind of stuff. It's really expensive as well as they get paid by the minute for being online don't they?

Who actually has the money to throw away on this kind of stuff? Super rich oil industry bosses, bankers and technology company executives?

It sure isn't me anyway, not with the low paid job that I do.

Posted

@lostboy1 same here. Since i was 12, i fantasized that if i was a girl, i would wear the skimpiest clothing, show acres of cleavage, and just have men wrapped around my finger. But it doesn't exactly work like that. For every man like me who worships women like that, there are a half dozen ready to abuse her and a few dozen to slut-shame her.

Posted
3 minutes ago, Powerhouse8000 said:

Thanks.

Actually, I do have big muscles and a big penis. In fact, everything about the way I look physically is really good except one thing. I am tall, relatively good looking, muscular, have a large penis, a deep voice - all the desirable characteristics you could want physically in a man. The only thing I've got going wrong is that I'm overweight and have too much body fat.

I don't resent them for it. But although I appreciate your post, I also don't like being told how I should think or that my thinking is wrong.

If men are valued more in almost every other sector of society, what examples of things could you give? You could say men are more valued in business, industry, technology, sport, entertainment, politics, etc, even though women can make achievements in all of these fields as well?

That's all fair and well, but for someone like me who is stuck in a dead-end job and living in poverty none of that means anything at all. None of my intellectual talents, if I have any, are being put to any good use at all. I would consider myself good at writing but have had few opportunities to explore that or utilize my skills in that area.

I am nearly 31 years old. I live in a small flat (apartment) alone in a city and I have a small car. I work 5 days a week, 37 hours per week. The money I earn is insufficient.

@Powerhouse8000 I would be curious why you think that you are stuck? Have you made extraneous efforts to get out of the dead-end job? Are you actively looking for other opportunities, interviewing, becoming more educated, more marketable, etc...?

I don't say these things to be condescending or provoking so please do not take my comments out of context. I'm just curious if you feel that you have really done everything possible to change your circumstances and situation. You're still fairly young in your career so there is still lots of time for you to be as successful as you would like but at the end of the day I find that getting out of a rut always starts with you and your motivation to do so.

I agree with you that being a white man these days is not all it's cracked up to be. Thirty or forty years ago it was much easier for a white male to be successful than today. Most companies have diversity statistics they are trying to reach and even if you are the most qualified it is altogether possible that you will be passed over for someone more diverse and less qualified. While this sucks it should also incentivize us, as white males, to work even harder at setting ourselves apart. If we want to be successful we can't just be "as good", as the next person we have to be much, much better and this takes determination on our part. I, personally, am currently working my ass of to get further ahead. I'm not doing bad right now but I want to do even better. I also worked my ass of to get where I am, today. I went to school while working night shift, scrimped and saved every penny for years, found ways to set myself apart from the next person. Went "above and beyond" in every job that I have had and pounded the pavement for years to continuously find better opportunities and to capitalize on them.

I'm not saying my way is the right way or the only way but it seems to have worked but only because I put the work into it.

Posted
11 minutes ago, Powerhouse8000 said:

I've never actually been on these cam sites and actually paid to watch a woman.

Personally I do not have the money for that kind of stuff. It's really expensive as well as they get paid by the minute for being online don't they?

Who actually has the money to throw away on this kind of stuff? Super rich oil industry bosses, bankers and technology company executives?

It sure isn't me anyway, not with the low paid job that I do.

The one's I have been on are free although to get the people to do what you want does cost money. I have not paid a penny for these sites but I do enjoy the spoils of those who do decide to pay. My guess is the people who are paying aren't rich. I would actually expect that most are either lower income or lower middle-class at best.

Just like with lottery tickets, gambling, smoking, drinking, etc... most people who enjoy these sites are spending the very little expendable money they have on them as their sole means of entertainment.

Posted

I have spent money in those sites. I have a middle class standard of living, though any other partnof the world, my income and my wife's would make us upper middle or upper income. Those sites can fleece you to the point you realize, shit i should have just seen a prostitute. Dangerous mentality.

@Powerhouse8000 sorry i didn't mean to tell you what to think. Just wanted to point out that women don't have it easy. Sex workers, in particular, are heavily exploited and devalued. I understand you feel devalued as well, so i don't want to minimize that. What women have that men don't is social support. It's not cool to share our problems with each other, so we shut down and isolate, whichnis poison. So, whike we have advantages in business, sports, politics, etc., we are hurting. We are angry. We find shitty ways to cope, like porn and drugs. And worse. Women are still paid less for the same work and don't get promoted at the same rate, but these mass shootings and terrorist attacks aren't being committed by women.

Posted
19 hours ago, lostboy1 said:

@Powerhouse8000 I would be curious why you think that you are stuck? Have you made extraneous efforts to get out of the dead-end job? Are you actively looking for other opportunities, interviewing, becoming more educated, more marketable, etc...?

I don't say these things to be condescending or provoking so please do not take my comments out of context. I'm just curious if you feel that you have really done everything possible to change your circumstances and situation. You're still fairly young in your career so there is still lots of time for you to be as successful as you would like but at the end of the day I find that getting out of a rut always starts with you and your motivation to do so.

I agree with you that being a white man these days is not all it's cracked up to be. Thirty or forty years ago it was much easier for a white male to be successful than today. Most companies have diversity statistics they are trying to reach and even if you are the most qualified it is altogether possible that you will be passed over for someone more diverse and less qualified. While this sucks it should also incentivize us, as white males, to work even harder at setting ourselves apart. If we want to be successful we can't just be "as good", as the next person we have to be much, much better and this takes determination on our part. I, personally, am currently working my ass of to get further ahead. I'm not doing bad right now but I want to do even better. I also worked my ass of to get where I am, today. I went to school while working night shift, scrimped and saved every penny for years, found ways to set myself apart from the next person. Went "above and beyond" in every job that I have had and pounded the pavement for years to continuously find better opportunities and to capitalize on them.

I'm not saying my way is the right way or the only way but it seems to have worked but only because I put the work into it.

No I don't make much effort to get out of it, but fuck that. I work hard enough.

Posted
18 hours ago, Lodz said:

I have spent money in those sites. I have a middle class standard of living, though any other partnof the world, my income and my wife's would make us upper middle or upper income. Those sites can fleece you to the point you realize, shit i should have just seen a prostitute. Dangerous mentality.

@Powerhouse8000 sorry i didn't mean to tell you what to think. Just wanted to point out that women don't have it easy. Sex workers, in particular, are heavily exploited and devalued. I understand you feel devalued as well, so i don't want to minimize that. What women have that men don't is social support. It's not cool to share our problems with each other, so we shut down and isolate, whichnis poison. So, whike we have advantages in business, sports, politics, etc., we are hurting. We are angry. We find shitty ways to cope, like porn and drugs. And worse. Women are still paid less for the same work and don't get promoted at the same rate, but these mass shootings and terrorist attacks aren't being committed by women.

It's quite possibly the case that only "alpha males" - the rich, successful and talented minority - really enjoy the true benefits of "male privilege". All other males largely get overlooked.

Not really in the mood for this discussion right now as I just got home and it's the weekend. That is probably a good thing.

Posted
18 minutes ago, Powerhouse8000 said:

No I don't make much effort to get out of it, but fuck that. I work hard enough.

@Powerhouse8000 I hope you can realize the irony in your response. Again, I am just trying to offer assistance and I'm not being critical in any way because I know we all have our own shit to deal with and everyone is different.

It's just that you say you want to get out of a dead end job but you don't want to do anything to make that happen. You want to be successful but if it requires extra effort you don't seem to be interested.

There are a very small number of people in this world who have fortune handed to them. For the rest of us, it comes with working our asses off to improve our own situation through continuous improvement. If you don't want to put in the effort then you may need to question if you really want out of your current situation. I am a firm believer that those who put in the effort will get rewarded and if it's not worth your time and effort to go above and beyond then that is fine but you need to re-calibrate your expectations because chances are very high that you will never "magically" become rich so you need to expect to receive what you put in to it.

It's a self-fulfilling prophecy to hate being in your current situation but refusing to do anything to change the circumstances.

Like I said, we all have our own shit and we can't all understand each others circumstances or motivations so I personally struggle to connect with your thoughts here. If I was miserable in my current circumstance then I would want to work my ass off to get out of it. For me, personally, this is having a small penis and if I knew that something could safely improve this... like something as silly as 1,000 pushups/day would make my dick grow, then I wouldn't be typing on this keyboard right now and I'd have pecs, biceps, and triceps of steel.

Since I personally cannot connect with your circumstances or mindset, I'll simply quote a comment you made to me in a different post where you couldn't connect with mine...

"Oh well. Each to their own and all that"

I do wish you the best and hope that you ultimately find what you're looking for in life and love.

Posted

Yeah, didn't mean to come across the wrong way there.

But I just don't see it happening. It may be a dead end job but there are also worse paid jobs and it has good holidays, pensions, etc so I am sticking at it for the moment. Changing jobs is too risky and I've tried the education route and didn't like it so what options do I have really?

In a certain sense I could be an "alpha male" as I am tall and well endowed physically with muscles and broad shoulders, but I am also carrying too much weight as well. Fat women seem to find me attractive, but slim women less so.

Posted

@Powerhouse8000 changing jobs is risky but "no risk no reward". It can be a leap of faith but if you're as poorly paid as you indicated then it shouldn't be terribly hard to find something to fall back on if the "leap" doesn't work.

I don't know what type of job you work in (office, factory, etc...) but you don't have to go to college for a long time to make yourself more marketable. Learning a trade can also be a really good move and requires much less schooling.

What I'm getting at is change starts with you. You have to find your direction and charge forward. You have to be willing to stretch your capabilities and sacrifice your time. If you really want to improve your situation then this is how it all begins.

Posted

I agree @lostboy1 what a man does for a living is hugely important.  

I think PH8 does manual labor. Lifting and moving, that sort of thing. If I am wrong set me straight.

I do customer service and admin work for a corporation.  It's ok but they constantly have layoffs and I live in fear of that.  What I need to do is prepare and not just be frightened dip-shit. To be fair I have been preparing by spending less, not drinking very often & drinking less when I do, and improving my diet.  The plan is that if I do get the boot to use the time on unemployment to take some courses.  

If I could do over again I would choose something w more security and more money.  

Posted

@Victimorthecrime, I've learned that there are very few truly "secure" jobs but the more marketable you can make yourself and the more that you can set yourself apart from others the easier it is to transition from one role to another. If there is "nothing special" about your skill sets or traits then you are competing with a much larger group of job seekers than if you have something special that few others have.

I agree with you that being in a position to survive a job loss is very important because that allows you to me more selective versus being desperate. When we are desperate we will take anything and once we are employed, even in jobs we don't like, we are much less motivated to try and improve our situation. I think this might be what @Powerhouse8000 is facing based on his comments.

There is no "one answer fits all" solution because we all have differing circumstances and differing skill sets. Each person has to figure out what works best and meets your individual goals. I truly feel that job satisfaction plays a major role in our psychological health because, aside from sleeping, the majority of people spend more time working than any other single activity.

Posted
22 minutes ago, lostboy1 said:

very few truly "secure" jobs but the more marketable you can make yourself and the more that you can set yourself apart from others

True but increasingly these corporations will find a way to fuck ya.  For example my company in sources nearly all of its software programmers from India and is outsourcing call center staff, included skilled positions like nurses, to the Philippines.  

If I could do over again I would do anything, literally anything other than work for a corporation. I have known people who have been made mentally ill from the endless mind games, put downs, lies, uncertainty.  

I should have been a postman or garbage man or a (so-called) teacher or whatever at least they have job security and pensions.  

Posted

You are correct that I do manual labour - but I actually do landscaping which includes gardening (cutting hedges and grass) and grave digging (we do the whole process of digging graves and do funerals) and also other jobs like emptying bins as well. I work for local government so I do not work for a private company and that means better job security, holidays and pensions.

Posted

@Victimorthecrime I understand your frustration with the globalization and insourcing/outsourcing issues that exist. I'm not a big fan of that either and I think it ultimately decreases the efficiency within a corporation. My guess is that at some point in the future we will see jobs returning to the US, once the standard of living in those outsourced countries start to catch up with the US. This is actually occurring in China, now, which is why you are starting to see jobs either move back to Mexico or to the US.

I work for a corporation too, and while I see some of the same issues you are describing I have to say that the company I work for has really helped me a lot in my career so I have a difficult time complaining. Benefits are good, I've taken advantage of "perks" such as tuition reimbursement, cheap health care, matching 401K, flexible work hours, etc... There is always some degree of uncertainty because companies exist to make money and if they are not making money then they have to get creative or fail. Fortunately the company I work for also doesn't partake in the "mind games, put downs, or lies" that you describe so I feel very blessed in that regard. Unfortunately, I do not think there are any jobs that necessarily have "security" and the jobs you mentioned where you think they have security have all had uncertainty as well. The post office almost shut down completely several years ago. They are making a comeback now, thanks to parcel services, but they are not risk free.

@Powerhouse8000 while landscaping is difficult and physical work, no doubt, I don't necessarily consider it a "dead end" job. Maybe working for the government limits your opportunities but there are a lot of opportunities in the private sector if you have that skill set. I know several landscapers, personally, who are raking in six figure incomes running their own businesses. If you enjoy that type of work then take a class on landscape design or horticulture becasue there are definitely opportunities in that field.

Posted

@Powerhouse8000 - that sounds like a good job to me. Hopefully over time you could move into something less physical such as supervising or whatever.  

@lostboy1 - btw I pro-business. A lot of these corporations have become crony capitalist, deriving their revenue from government contracts. They pay us to act like we are doing something so that they can act like they are overseeing something but it is all inane administrative performance art. It is a lot like counting and categorizing turds 💩 instead of cleaning them up.

Interstingly enough I currently work on one large account and it is in Texas. I talk to people from Texas all day and I must say - very nice folks.   

Posted

Oh yeah, and one other aspect of my job is that it's free fresh air and physical exercise. Many people don't get that in their job.

For want of a better word, it's also quite a masculine job. It is dirty, physically demanding, and tough.

It's strange that I can do what is a fairly masculine job, yet be so self-hating and critical about my own masculinity, isn't it?

Because sometimes I just hate myself for being male. This past couple of weeks it has been a really strong feeling.

Now when I say that this, that does not mean that I desire to be transsexual or whatever. It's just been a very strong self-hatred based around being male.

Posted

Male bashing is so pervasive in our culture that people don't even notice it, the way cat owners don't notice the shit stench.  Every idiot and every bad guy in every TV show, movie or commercial is male. Nothing good is ever said about men as a group.  Ever problem, every bad thing in society and in history is 100 percent the fault of men.  The innumerable accomplishments of men are never so much as mentioned - advancements in agriculture, medicine, engineering, economics, accounting, law etc etc etc all ignored in schools and the media.  

We are supposed to be these super human, never-get-sick, high earning high achieving competitive work-horses that are nonetheless deeply compassionate and emotionally available at all times.  

So it's little wonder men are angry and self-hating.  

 

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