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tired


pardal
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I’m very tired of feeling bad. I have this permanent anguish. In these days I just think about giving up. Tried to go to a therapist. Felt so stupid, so not normal. People say to me this is a phase. But I know is not a phase- It lasts for too long. Is who I am, I have this disease and I’m tired.

On the other hand, I don't whant to give up. I need to organize my mind, set up a plan, do something before I break.

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Hi Pardal

I’m very tired of feeling bad. I have this permanent anguish. In these days I just think about giving up. Tried to go to a therapist. Felt so stupid, so not normal. People say to me this is a phase. But I know is not a phase- It lasts for too long. Is who I am, I have this disease and I’m tired.

On the other hand, I don't whant to give up. I need to organize my mind, set up a plan, do something before I break.

I tried my Therapist for the first time on Tuesday just gone. I wouldn't go to one, but after that much mithering from my Psychiatrist, I agreed to give it a try!

Well, my first meeting didn't go to well as I turned up 15mins late. I had never been to where she was situated or even met her before. I explained that I had got lost, but she were having none of it...

She informed me that if I were late again, then I wouldn't be seen... If only she knew that I didn't want to be there in the first place, not to mention the obstacles that I faced at meeting her with my Anxiety problem...

She started telling me that she would be doing a lot of writing as she was assessing me at the same time. I weren't arsed what she did. She started asking me questions about myself, then my family. Then how long I'd been under a Psychiatrist, what medication I were on, how many times I've been hospitalised and how long for?

So I kindly informed her that if she were a Therapist like she's telling me she is, then she would know the answers to all her questions as it was my Psychiatrist who had got in touch with her in the first place.

So that was my first meeting with my Therapist. I go again next week. Will keep you informed of my nxt meeting, should be exciting, shouldn't it!

Are you seeing any other professional? You don't really say much do you? Could you possibly come back with a bit more info please...

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I am glad to hear you are not giving up and you are looking for a way out of the darkness. First off, ignore those who say it is "just a phase." That statement is one of the most crippling I have ever heard!

I would highly recommend giving therapy another chance. Perhaps the therapis was not a right fit for you. Sometimes it takes several before you find the one for you! I went through several the first time before I found one I "clicked with" but, once I did, I did see improvement in certain areas. Then, I moved. My current T I found on referral by a friend who is a SW and this T has been great for me. Honestly, our sessions are more like chatting with a friend sometimes!

Your description definitely sounds like you are dealing with some facet of depression and its difficult to face alone. I think seeing a doc and a therapist could help you a lot.

Hang in there. Feel free to share what you feel comfortable with and I'm sure there are others who will be able to offer advice and support based on their own experiences.

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Paula you are right, i don't talk to much. I don't like talking about myself. I suppose that is one of the reasons why my visit to the therapist was so unsuccessful. I was hoping she would give some advice or some suggestion. But she just stayed there, looking at me, waiting for me to say anything. 45 min. seemed like a long day.

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Guest ASchwartz

Hi Pardal,

Seems that you are really struggling with a lot of depression. Are you taking any medication for depression? Is this your first time in therapy. My hope is that you are seeing a therapist who used cognitive behavioral therapy as that is what works really well with depression. A lot of therapists still do not use this method. I do not know if you have posted elsewhere but, can you tel us more about yourself and what may be the cause of your current depression?

Allan

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  • 2 weeks later...

I’m not taking any medication now. I hate what I have become as a person. I don’t know how to relate with other people and I’m not able to establish a relationship with anyone. I’m now trying to discover a new therapist since I hated the one I have tried. But I must confess that the idea of talking about me and my pathetic live whit someone (even a therapist) is very difficult.

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