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feel like to suicide


breathless
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my parents don't know that they push me into such a horrible feelings. i feel depressed all the time because of them. they laugh at me all day today..they think that im the most useless person in the world. without their help im just nothing..what's the point to live a life like this..i wonder..

i can only show that how angery i am when they hurt me with their stupid ways. but they will never know that how much tears i hold inside of me. how hopeless that i feel about my life. should i just do it..just to suicide..? i have a boy that i love very much..i have a grandma that i have to support in finance..without me..will they be ok to live a good life..? i think that's the only thing makes me to continue this crazy life..

i believe suicide isn't a stupid choice to me.

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Hi Breathless

i believe suicide isn't a stupid choice to me.

I know exactly what you mean! I have been there soooo many times myself!

i can only show that how angery i am when they hurt me with their stupid ways. but they will never know that how much tears i hold inside of me. how hopeless that i feel about my life. should i just do it..just to suicide..? i have a boy that i love very much..i have a grandma that i have to support in finance..without me..will they be ok to live a good life..? i think that's the only thing makes me to continue this crazy life..

It will hurt, it will hurt you like crazy! But you've got to prove to them that your stronger than that! Let them laugh at you, but you know what... He who laughs last, laughs longest! It's a true saying!

You mention that you have a son. What will happen to your son if something happens to you? Some day... He could be in the position that you are in now? Think about it!

Also, what will happen to your Grandma... No one deserves to be treated like this!

Could you not have a word with your parents & explain to them what this is doing to you? How this is affecting you? Just exactly how you are feeling! It takes a lot of guts to try & commit Suicide, I don't care what anyone says! It's also a desperate cry for help!

You don't mention whether you are under any Psychiatrist, Psychologist, or in any kind of Therapy. I would suggest you make an appointment to see your Doctor & explain how your feeling at the moment... He could put you on Anti-Depressants to try and lift your moods a little...

Please keep posting, we are all here for you!

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Guest ASchwartz

Breathless and Paula,

Paula, wow, thank you for the wonderful way you respond to Breathless.

Breathless, do you realize how Paula really understands and is there for you?

Listen, Breathless, suicide is not a stupid choice, not at all but, it's a hopeless choice that leaves you with nothing. I guess that is my way of saying that I do not want to lose you and neither does Paula or anyone here.

What can you do to make your family less influential in your life?

Allan:(

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My dear Paula and Allan

thanks so much for reading my post..and thanks for writing me such wonderful words..

I didn't make it..sorry make you guys worry about me..

I feel depressed as usual..I feel every tiny thing makes me feel like to die..

I feel really bad that my husband isn't close to me anymore..there is no way for me to be an attractive woman that he desires for..last week I bought a VIP Card from gym and i thought he would love a girl who is active and loves sport..i try to be a woman that he may like..i don't know what im doing everyday..i feel no matter what i do..he is distant now..maybe forever..

but my marriage only last a few months...it dies so fast??

at the moment..im not able to tell my sadness to anyone but ppl here..

he(my husband) used to be someone who listen to me and gives me support..

but i guess he finally getting tired of it..i can not blame him. i was wrong cos i should never marry him when im mentally sick..

last night i had a long night talk with my cousin. she told me that she feel depressed too but i didn't tell her im even worse than her. she will never know how i feel..nobody..

i know that everyone feel depressed sometimes..but why can't i just pull myself out of this mood for so many years??!! why do i feel so low confidence..my husband doesn't send me email from his work like he used to be..he doesn't call me like he used to be..what im so worry about..

i live for nothing..not for my family.. not for myself..i live just for live..

Edited by breathless
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Hi Breathless

I didn't make it..sorry make you guys worry about me..

I feel depressed as usual..I feel every tiny thing makes me feel like to die..

I feel really bad that my husband isn't close to me anymore..there is no way for me to be an attractive woman that he desires for..last week I bought a VIP Card from gym and i thought he would love a girl who is active and loves sport..i try to be a woman that he may like..i don't know what im doing everyday..i feel no matter what i do..he is distant now..maybe forever..

but my marriage only last a few months...it dies so fast??

Could you please give us a little more information on your marriage, and where you think it has failed?

If your husband wanted someone who was energetic, then he would of married someone energetic! Breathless, don't be so hard on yourself! If your husband though that your marriage was a failure, then he would of packed his belongings and gone by now!

Your husband is probably worried sick about you, & that is why he is so quiet? Have you talked to your husband about how you are feeling? He could think a number of reasons why you don't include him your problems? He could be thinking on the same line as you, "That you don't want him?"

at the moment..im not able to tell my sadness to anyone but ppl here..

he(my husband) used to be someone who listen to me and gives me support..

but i guess he finally getting tired of it..i can not blame him. i was wrong cos i should never marry him when im mentally sick..

This is exactly what I''m talking about! He could be thinking that you are closing him out of your problems?

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