What is wrong with me?

[Karen]

I have veen diagnosed as depressed for 12 months now and am on 60mg citalopran. i constantly think of taking tablets to end things - i don't think i would do so but knowing i could is comforting. i liken my tablets (I have a stockpile ready) as a comfort blanket - take it away and i don' know what i would do. why do i feel like this? When will it stop?

[crowyhead]

If you've been on the same med for 12 months and you're still feeling this bad, it sounds to me like you need to go back to the doc and get your meds checked, because I don't think they're working properly.

I've had similar kinds of suicidal thoughts before; not necessarily PLANNING on it, but wanting to have the means there. It's both scary and weirdly comforting, but it's not a good place to be. If you feel like you're going to use your stockpile, please call a crisis hotline or your doctor or go to the emergency room, ok?

crowy

[Mark]

Karen,

If medications you are taking for your depressive symptoms are not substantially lessening your symptoms within about a two month period, then something isn't working quite right with your treatment, and that's not your fault - it is a problem with the medication. maybe the dose isn't right for you, or maybe the particular medication you're on isn't a good candidate for your body and brain. Not every medicine works well for every person. Please call your doctor and tell him or her that you aren't feeling any better and could he or she see fit to adjust your medication, or alter it?

Keep in mind that there are good non-drug therapies for depression, as well as good drug therapies for depression. If you want to try something that has no side effects and is scientifically proven to help depressed people get better as well or slightly better than working medication, please see about finding a psychotherapist who can provide you with a course of cognitive behavioral therapy for depression.

Mark