AndreaB Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 It's easy in this day in age with all the destruction in the world to forget about God. I grew up in church, but I no longer attend. I don't consider myself a religious person. I'm not going to lie part of it is because I've suffered through so much that I needed to blame someone. And that someone was God. I don't forgive God completely for the things that happen to me nor do I really blame Him. I just feel like He deserted me in my time of need. Last night for some reason I felt a brief period of peace and calm. That's weird because out of the blue here I am thinking badly about myself once again, but also here's this peaceful feel. I believe that was God letting me know that He's still with me. I don't believe in going to chruch or reading the Bible to get a understanding of God although it has helped me. I find myself with a cure for depression besides the therapy and medication and that's having a relationship with God. My only fault is it's difficult when I have to suffer and I can't hold on to Him like I wish I could. If I could just remeber He's here and that I can survive I won't feel so down. Having depression and believeing in God puts me at a crossroad. One point God loves me and at another why does he let me suffer with this horrible illness? But than I'm reminded of Job, who suffered for no reason, but still loved God inspite of it. His children where killed, his fortune was gone, and he suffered terrible physical pain, but he still loved God. I want to be as Job was to worship God no matter how hard life gets...I remeber this one Bible passage that I agree with whole heartly....Timothy 1:15. Just take a minute to read it and you'll understand. I ask God why do I suffer and God replies what makes you so special that you can't suffer? My life with God is going to continue to be a struggle, but the simple peace he gave me last night was enough for me to know He's there....p.s. If you don't believe please don't comment back negatively this is my opinion and my own belief. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smallstar Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 Hi Andrea, so if you believe in God, and have faith, than surely you need to learn to live that faith in good times and bad. Kind of like a marriage. You can't only believe when things are going your way, you need to have faith during the difficult times that God is with you, this is His plan for you. We need to accept His will even if it differs from ours. Being depressed, yeah it stinks, but I think it's great you talk to God when you are feeling particularly bad, it must bring you some kind of relief. I know when I am dealing with something and I am feeling overwhelmed, I can no longer figure it out on my own, I do turn to prayer, sometimes it is the only thing that can calm me down when I get myself so worked up. I'm not trying to preach, mainly because I don't really "know" anything, but you brang it up so I just wanted to share my feelings on it. One thing I truly try not to do is ever blame God for what is wrong in my life. The thing I have to learn that I personally have trouble with is learning not to turn away from Jesus when I feel like I'm in need. I don't mean by blaming him or stopping believing but I look to other places for comfort. I realize this and I am trying to change it. Anyway Andrea, I am glad you had a calm and peaceful night, it allowed you to feel Jesus in your life, and you recognized that feeling, that is great. One thing that helps me is to remember, I think it's a song, "this is the day the Lord has made, let us rejoice and be glad", when my mom was in the hospital asleep my dad would write that on the dry erase board in her room everyday, and believe it or not it was a comforting thought. Just try and remember that your faith should be your rock, it should be the thing that keeps you going, not something to blame for your problems. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
malign Posted April 29, 2009 Report Share Posted April 29, 2009 Andrea, I think it's great that you found a place of peace in the midst of your pain, and I say, hold on to it, whatever it's called.My only concern is that you not turn to blaming yourself, instead of God. Maybe the best thing would be to forget about blaming anyone, and just keep moving forward. It sounds like you're making progress. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndreaB Posted April 30, 2009 Author Report Share Posted April 30, 2009 thank you both for you're advice:) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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